Heart

This topic was created in the Virgo forum by Reiniba-Chan on Saturday, January 20, 2007 and has 35 replies.
when virgs commit to a bf-gf relationship...do they give their whole heart over, completely 100% attached.. or do they leave some of it open so they won't get a burn that they can't handle a few years later in case things may not work out..???
just wondering if they are smart enough to not be 100% attached to anybody even if they are in a "committed" relationship.
I told my last bf that I would only be 70% attached and that he should do the same.
don't worry about how I get my percentages!! LOL
Well, I have to say, Virgo or no Virgo, you'd be settling for second best if you either gave or received anything less than 100% . Robots are programmed to run like this....not humans?
I beg to differ, Robots are programmed. Let's face it branh, if you give less than 100% in any area of your life, would you expect 100% back?
I wouldn't feel right if I gave anything less my 100% . If you are in a committed relationship . . . you should be able to trust the other person completely with your heart. Of course there are those who get hurt by doing so . . . it's how we learn, grow, and decide what path is right for us. Yes you may get hurt by giving 100% , however I think if you never are willing to ive it out 100% , then you might miss out on some wonderful things . . .who knows. . maybe even "the one".
It seems Branh, in your world, humans seem to be following 'your' script.
In the real world I think you will find that irregardless of the personal defintion of 100% most people would consider themselves losers to have given any less than 100% of THEMSELVES to any cause they are passionate about during theore lives.
But then if you can compare yourself with a robot I can completely understand why you feel 100% is not attainable. Clearly you have issues. Good luck to you.
branh, maybe try to stop being so cynical - I thought this was a Capricorn trait! Your 100% is what YOU give, and can only be measured by YOU. How you live your live and how successful you are equally is also measured by YOU. Other people, well if they don't think that you are giving your 100% that's their problem and insecurity surely? As you say balance is the key.
You are passionate from the way you write so I have no doubt that you give 100% .

oh my goodness.. talk about a waste of damn time.
I don't have time for bickering.
I was talking about the HEART not how much "love"(whatever love is to you) you're throwing into a relationship...my goodness..
when you give your heart 100% over that means you you are just waiting to get hurt. If you give your heart 70% over which means you don't trust them completely and you will leave the relationship when needed, then you don't get hurt as badly as you would giving 100% attachment..
if you give 10% then if the person hurts you by breaking up with you etc.- you won't care much at all whereas if you gave 50% you'll probably complain about it and take about a week or so to get over it, BUT you WILL get over it pretty quick...
if someone gave 100% lol....you may never get over it for years and you'd probably want revenge for that person.
the only thing that can help cancel all this out is what you believe..
Another thing: I put 100% love and faith, saying all my faults, hopes, dreams, sacrifice after sacrifice..on and on..for my first love...yeah..I gave all of myself (except for my body)..and I got a huge slap in the face...
Never will I give 99% of my heart ever again!! >_>
You always carry your first love in your heart..
Love takes you really high ^___^
Don't have time for bickering RC?
What are you doing on here then?
lol Currently, and most of the time, I don't have time for bickering.
In fact, that one topic called "Okay Virgos Bring it"
Yeah, I did that during the holiday mostly and it was actually somewhat fun annoying strangers.
I don't spend but 5 to 10 minutes at a time on this site. I check this site totally at random. : P
Ya'll spend hours arguing about absolutely nothing. I see the time stamps. : P
Trust me, I get bored really quick. And the only thing that I would waste my time with would be a guy that I'm in love with. Hence, Aqua Obsession to the extreme(trying to figure him out etc.) and DON'T expect me to wait around for an answer forever. I don't do that with a guy I'm in love with either.
Ya'll yap about nothing when answers are really QUITE SIMPLE. You all go in gray all day long when there is plenty of black and white that you never notice because you can't ever get over yourselves. If I waste anymore than 20 min max on this site, it's because my humanitarian trait makes me feel sorry for you people! And I DON'T care if you think I'm arrogant. smile



I am not a Virgo (so feel free to disregard this, if you like), but I think that I understand what you are asking.
If you go into a relationship anticipating the possibility of it failing and not give all of yourself (love or heart) that you have to give, perhaps that, in and of itself, increases the probability of failure. Is it fair to the relationship, to the other person, or truthfully, to yourself to not give it everything? If it is not worth everything, then perhaps it is not worth anything...
Granted, all of this is easier said than done... Just something that has crossed my mind at times that seemed like it might be relevant...
----------------------
"if someone gave 100% lol....you may never get over it for years and you'd probably want revenge for that person"
LOL... Perhaps that is true...
Wow branh, couldn't agree more.
RC do yourself a favour - get over yourself.
guess I hit a nerve there. lol
I didn't say that I had superior intellect. I just tend to try to learn lessons faster than others, (get over myself faster)
btw I STILL love him. smile
You can prove that you're a loser by being a hater all day long..still won't care, brahn.
does any virgo have anything to say about the heart..
and please don't yap all day long about something you don't understand if you really don't..
sweeties, I don't really give a flying flip about how anyone else goes into it..if you don't want to go into it with calculation, don't worry about it. Wasn't asking you all for calculations, if you want to throw in your whole heart etc..go right on ahead..
the guy I deal with gets 100% effort from me and 70% of my heart..so that I don't get hurt as badly.. he wants to put his full heart into it, that's his problem, but 100% effort should be automatic..
hope you get the picture now..
I guess the answer to my question from you non-existent cowardly virgs..is YES, you do give your whole heart!! And it's apparent it ain't much to give..
that's pretty sad.
btw I love economics!!

lol
I'm glad. smile
RC..When I am swallowed up in a relationship, it's usually swallowed whole. If I get hurt I just get hurt 100% . It takes alot to move on to a new relationship, (I need to recharge to be able to give that much again). I'm not really afraid to put myself on someone's chopping block if I love them.
lol. Well, that's why I don't initiate relationships. lol. For some reason, when someone else offers to be with me, I don't get hurt when they choose to leave.
I have to love you first. The thing that really hurts is someone lying to you. That's why you give a certain amount of your heart, or in other words, a certain amount of trust in them..don't you dare put full trust in them. smile
When you rely on someone else to make you happy..lol that's the stupidist thing you could ever do.
Don't give your full heart over!! I'm 17, but I KNOW I will get hurt if I give my heart over to you humans.
Well RC....If you don't give it, chances are that one of us humans are just gonna creap up behind ya and STEAL IT!Winking
You won't even know it's been snatched until it's far far too late.....MOOOOOOOHAHAHA
RC - it's a ridiculous question -- you can't tell someone or even tell yourself -- 'i'm only going to give 70% " pleezzz.... when you are involved with someone and truly in love there are different phases and levels of your love and commitment but it happens/evolves as the relationship does or doesn't.....
and bran - you are a true virgo - "i am there when needed, not when wanted" that's Virgos problem -- they don't do want/desire/passion -- they are whatever works/pragmatics -- i don't know that they can really 'get into' a relationship with their whole hearts/souls....
Oh we do do want/desire/passion yessss. I speak only for myself but often my REAL problem there is putting someone elses' Want/desire/passion ahead of my own so that it is hidden in the shadows and not out for all to see. That is NOT meant to sound like a matyr thing. It is just how I am. I will put my coat in the puddle so to speak. Somewhere in the not so distant past, this was considered a virtue. Now it has done a 180, and putting yourself second means you lack passion. Isn't true passion being true to who you really are. There are so many desires I have, but my REAL passion must be for other people. It's the only explanation I have. It's real. I gain so much from seeing other people happy and at peace and so much discomfort otherwise. It's an ache inside of me which I call my passion.
Wow, if you are true/real then you must be a wonderful person.... do you really live like that tho?....
i would think it a fabulously sweet and gentlemanly thing to do -- it is still a great virtue in my book -- to hold your coat over a puddle....
i think you sound too good to be true...
I am a female. I just used that as a metaphor..but yes..I truly do go out of my way and step into discomfort if it comforts someone else. I'm a mess in alot of ways. Like I'm way too sensitive but yes REALLY my passion is for people!
Sorry Gotta go.....Winkingsweet dreams
Jwalker there is a BIG difference between Virgo males vs. Virgo females! Glad you are the female one, much stable! lol Tongue
RC - it's a ridiculous question -- you can't tell someone or even tell yourself -- 'i'm only going to give 70% " pleezzz.... when you are involved with someone and truly in love there are different phases and levels of your love and commitment but it happens/evolves as the relationship does or doesn't.....
and bran - you are a true virgo - "i am there when needed, not when wanted" that's Virgos problem -- they don't do want/desire/passion -- they are whatever works/pragmatics -- i don't know that they can really 'get into' a relationship with their whole hearts/souls....
ridiculous?..what a "logical" opinion
People don't understand themselves. People do what they feel or do what is right. Until we come to an understanding and wisdom to know the difference, we'll never get anywhere. And how many humans have this figured out? Common sense will tell you: hardly any!! If we had that figured out, we'd be happy as hell. So why the hell would you give your WHOLE heart over to something that will undeniably fail? And still people follow their heart! Even me lately. smile

RC: "So why the hell would you give your WHOLE heart over to something that will undeniably fail?"

And why even bother when it "will undeniably fail"?
exactly! you don't bother! lol But you know all that crack cocaine they say "Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all"
Funny how the only time people even bother to have FAITH is when love is the concern. Pathetic.
So I say!
be friends people! be friends!! I know it's hard for you humans but give the whole heart/brain, feelings/what is right some serious thought!!
Maybe then you'll get somewhere. smile
What I meant was, why bother giving ** anything ** if you believe it "will undeniably fail"? (whether that be "70% " of you heart, or your WHOLE heart)
RC: "Funny how the only time people even bother to have FAITH is when love is the concern. Pathetic."
Faith in myself, the people around me, and life (and God) is something fuels my entire existence... For, if you do not have faith in those things, then what point is there to living. Nihilism is merely that....
duh...
and I say again. be friends, people!!
ESCORPIONA, you think Virguys are unstable in a 'bad way' or 'good way'? It's apart of being a human sign in my belief if you're considering the zodiac in all this; Being a human is about being more than your FEELINGS; we are faced with yet another struggle within ourselves and it is the war between our intellect, and our powerful primal urges; being a human sign; (Hell being a human period) is about subjugation of the immediate/libidinal impulses; that could be why some human signs can come off as 'cold and detatched'.....we become aware of ourselves as logical, thinking, percieveing and peaceful, yet waring, fighthing, inconsistent creatures. We are as emotionally powerful as animals, but must hold ourselves to a different standard; not 'higher' or 'lower'....just different, our world tends to be more complex becuase we are thinking beings, and not just of our hearts.....but the fire is STILL there....
Nihilism works for SOME RC; you have to be tolerant of that view as well; it does exist, and depending upon circumstance, it could be an effective living system for some; I'll admit myself as to be one of these 'faithless' people; having faith in people is crazy because people can let us down, change their minds, or do something other completely contrary and arbitrary to our faithful feelings towards them; you can have faith in a parent, but they are human, and ere, and we are left holding out d1cks/tits wondering: "how could they do that? I had faith in them..." So? You had faith, and they have something more powerful the idealism.....free will.
I cannot judge if I am not god...I cannot know if I judge; to judge is to know all, and possess omnipotence; I am human, and I ere; I can only ask of this man what he can spare me, in hopes that it will be on little more than his word that he gives me this parcel....it is out of kindness that this faith may arise; but consider the otherside; the children who come from broken homes, and don't know the kindness and love, and trust in people....you can only have faith in one thing....yourself.
excuse me; typo RC; meant this for alcheme.
Jwalker, I know EXACTLY what you mean.....I enjoy see people happy, and coming to the aid of another; one doesn't have to place their passions second; only be mindful of others FIRST, but recognize at the same time that you are human as well, and you want for things, and need as well; I believe your Altruism; it's very genuine; it's a love so strong, that you sacrifce for others not in expectation; but in knowing that you made someones day that much better.
VE: "Nihilism works for SOME RC; you have to be tolerant of that view as well; it does exist, and depending upon circumstance, it could be an effective living system for some; I'll admit myself as to be one of these 'faithless' people; having faith in people is crazy"
I am tolerant of many points of view (or atleast I try to be, theory and practice are two different things). I was merely stating my beliefs as food for thought and a response to RC's statement that people only have faith in regards to love.
While having faith in others is a noble and beautiful concept, as you said there are many faults to it, and I do not discount that some people have good reason for their lack of faith in others. I, too, have problems with this in practice. Balancing faith in others with practicality and pragmatism, in context with the things that have happened in my life, can be a constant battle. But it is one that I refuse to stop fighting and I refuse to lose. I will not let my experiences cast a permanent shadow of darkness on my existence and steal the one thing that I truly cherish, my soul...
That being said, I did not only state that a person should have faith in other people. I also referenced having faith in yourself and life itself. A person needs to have faith in something, belief in something, otherwise there is nothing. And, to me, that is nihilism...a lack of belief / faith in something, anything. That is what I was trying to get across, not merely faith in others. My apologies for not effectively communicating that...

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