Help with virgo behaving totally crazy?! Is this a virgo thing? Is there virgo logic in it? Help

This topic was created in the Virgo forum by haylz124 on Wednesday, August 16, 2017 and has 23 replies.
So Iv been dating this virgo I really like him Iv posted about his bizarre vanishing acts a few times. However, some new info has come to light!

This virgo vanishes regularly which is annoying as hell we are FB friends and all his posts seem to target me. When we speak he is overly nice and heavy with me I'm his girl etc etc but them poof he's gone again.

So I bumped into one of his friends and got talking as we all went to school together many many years ago. Anywho apparently he's obsessed with me he talks about me constantly, checks my FB loads, reads everything on it and checks how often I'm online and yeah the statuses I thought were about me were to provoke a response from me! He's got no issues hiding this to his friends even speaks about me like I'm his GF to them!

He goes for weeks at a time and I wouldn't call myself his GF cos he keeps pulling away from me. He leaves ME hanging

If he likes me so much why would he keep vanishing? Is there a kind virgo that could shed some light onto this for me? Or is this all nothing to do with being a virgo?
Just to add I'm at the end of my tether with him and about to call it quits all together with him and his crazy behaviour
Posted by TomSawyer
You remind me of my bullette-ex.

Are you a Taurus?
Either that or Sag/Cancer. Lol can never go wrong with the fruitloop classics.

User Submitted Image
Posted by sierraleoone
but why don't you just ask him directly about it

i promise you that nothing will be resolved if you are not direct coz right now he is being very passive-aggressive and will likely stay that way unless you do something about it

also.. you still want to be his girlfriend?


If I ask him I never get the real answer I always feel his feeding me total BS Iv got no issue calling someone on their BS but he won't give a straight answer

I was letting him go I'd decided enough was enough a few days ago so started moving on mentally then today I get this info so now I'm just really confused. He is so amazing the weeks we talk then bam he's gone I thought he might have been a player or just using me but then I hear this! I just don't get it at all

Posted by TomSawyer
You remind me of my bullette-ex.

Are you a Taurus?
Taurus wrong

Also

Sag wrong

Cancer wrong

Wanna keep guessing? I could go all day none of these signs are even In my chart ?
Posted by sierraleoone
Posted by haylz124
Posted by sierraleoone
but why don't you just ask him directly about it

i promise you that nothing will be resolved if you are not direct coz right now he is being very passive-aggressive and will likely stay that way unless you do something about it

also.. you still want to be his girlfriend?


If I ask him I never get the real answer I always feel his feeding me total BS Iv got no issue calling someone on their BS but he won't give a straight answer

I was letting him go I'd decided enough was enough a few days ago so started moving on mentally then today I get this info so now I'm just really confused. He is so amazing the weeks we talk then bam he's gone I thought he might have been a player or just using me but then I hear this! I just don't get it at all

just leave him be

maybe with some amount of time, he can think about what he's doing wrong
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Thankyou I for my sanity have to call it a day I think patience and illusions are not my thing I'm more of a honest, blunt straight to the point person

Posted by TomSawyer
Posted by haylz124
Posted by TomSawyer
You remind me of my bullette-ex.

Are you a Taurus?
Taurus wrong

Also

Sag wrong

Cancer wrong

Wanna keep guessing? I could go all day none of these signs are even In my chart ?
Nah, I don't.

Need to make some food.

Gl with your Virgo.
click to expand
TY

I've said this before and it was a lesson learnt from my past mistakes..don't waste anymore time on someone who keeps popping in and out of your life. If you don't like his behaviour now then don't put up with it. Let him know that you don't like it when he keeps disappearing and if he still continues obviously he didn't care enough to put your feelings first.

Regardless of how he's obsessively stalking you..unless he walks the talk I think you should move on. Find someone who communicates and who wants to spend time you. Not someone who keeps coming in/out of your life on his own terms. That's just selfish on their part. Who needs that?


Scorpio?



Nope ?


Posted by Pisces1803
I've said this before and it was a lesson learnt from my past mistakes..don't waste anymore time on someone who keeps popping in and out of your life. If you don't like his behaviour now then don't put up with it. Let him know that you don't like it when he keeps disappearing and if he still continues obviously he didn't care enough to put your feelings first.

Regardless of how he's obsessively stalking you..unless he walks the talk I think you should move on. Find someone who communicates and who wants to spend time you. Not someone who keeps coming in/out of your life on his own terms. That's just selfish on their part. Who needs that?
Yes thankyou he knows I hate him vanishing Iv told him enough times! But here we are again and this time he's really vanished I usually get a comment or like on my posts at the moment I'm getting nothing. I don't think he's stable mentally this behaviours just wrong and I am so I don't need that type of person in my life if they aren't helping themselves

First, I feel obligated to say: please don't judge your relationship on how quickly or often someone likes your Facebook posts... from my experience, that's not a very mature thing to do. I'm not sure how old you are, but I would have a hard time taking a girl seriously if that even came up in conversation.

No one I know IRL is even active on Facebook anymore.

But as a Virgo, I did have one girl tell me once that it was weird that I disappeared and then came back. I tried to explain to her (unsuccessfully) that she had it backwards.

As a kid, I developed a 3-message rule: if I call a girl 3 times in a row and she doesn't call back, then it's over. I absolutely refuse to make a fool out of myself by chasing a girl that doesn't want to be chased.

As an adult, I had to apply this rule to texting, too. If I send you a text and you don't reply, I'm going to wait a few days before sending a second one. If you don't reply to that, I'm going to wait about 2 weeks before sending a third. If you don't reply to that, I assume we're done.

The girl that complained about me disappearing (a Libra, I think) was doing exactly that... not replying to my text, then being offended that I didn't text again, and again, and again, and again.

So if I were the guy in this relationship, the most logical explanation to this problem would be that I'm waiting for you to make some of the effort. Relationships have to be a 2-way street, and I can't be the only one making an effort.

If this doesn't apply then I don't know what to tell you: I don't usually play games, and get bored, fast, with girls that do. If I like you then I'm excited to talk to you, and I'll chat with you all day and night... if I'm not excited, then it means I'm not really in to you.
Posted by csdude55
First, I feel obligated to say: please don't judge your relationship on how quickly or often someone likes your Facebook posts... from my experience, that's not a very mature thing to do. I'm not sure how old you are, but I would have a hard time taking a girl seriously if that even came up in conversation.

No one I know IRL is even active on Facebook anymore.

But as a Virgo, I did have one girl tell me once that it was weird that I disappeared and then came back. I tried to explain to her (unsuccessfully) that she had it backwards.

As a kid, I developed a 3-message rule: if I call a girl 3 times in a row and she doesn't call back, then it's over. I absolutely refuse to make a fool out of myself by chasing a girl that doesn't want to be chased.

As an adult, I had to apply this rule to texting, too. If I send you a text and you don't reply, I'm going to wait a few days before sending a second one. If you don't reply to that, I'm going to wait about 2 weeks before sending a third. If you don't reply to that, I assume we're done.

The girl that complained about me disappearing (a Libra, I think) was doing exactly that... not replying to my text, then being offended that I didn't text again, and again, and again, and again.

So if I were the guy in this relationship, the most logical explanation to this problem would be that I'm waiting for you to make some of the effort. Relationships have to be a 2-way street, and I can't be the only one making an effort.

If this doesn't apply then I don't know what to tell you: I don't usually play games, and get bored, fast, with girls that do. If I like you then I'm excited to talk to you, and I'll chat with you all day and night... if I'm not excited, then it means I'm not really in to you.
Thanks

No I'm not that girl I do text back and last contact we had was initiated by me!

I'm in my 30s and use FB to post pics of my kids for family that live in other countries also just general positive posts about life. Stuff about kids he usually doesn't like which is cool but I was going out last weekend and some pics got put up of me I looked super hot but nothing from him and usually I would. I'm not taking it as a fb like thing but more unusual behaviour of him not only has he not spoken to me he's not commented or even liked my stuff when he vanished before he always did still. It kinda lets me know he's still there for me if you get me?

This is the point that confuses me he is full on and I find it really annoying I don't like to be contacted all day every day although I oblige and keep the convo going. Then poof he's gone nothing. If he gets back in contact from the minute the first message is sent he wants to text 24/7 again

Classic, push pull dynamic sadly. I hope your will is strong ?.?
Posted by Kityyyyyyy
Classic, push pull dynamic sadly. I hope your will is strong ?.?
Just googled this I'm outee don't fancy wasting the next couple of years of my life

WTF is wrong with people why not just go with what you want rather than play games

It's been great virgos but I don't think I'll be reapproaching your sign anytime soon! There seems to be two versions of virgo one side is lovely and helpful and the other has a false air of superiority thinking the rest of the world are for you but when called on your BS retreat or manipulate what was previously said to your favour. No other area of these forums has the same stuff going on as the virgos other signs are pleasant and approachable where as this one is like feeding mice to snakes.

Maybe my future path will cross with a good virgo but I won't hold my breath

Thanks to the few kind helpful virgos that truely carry the good points of your sign, for the advice

Said from a true ............ not Scorpio, cancer, sag or Taurus
Do not let this taint your view, for I too have been where you are. You have two choices the way I see it.

1. Put up with the questionable behavior which causes you undue stress and pain or.

2. Walk away, with your held held high, with a bucket load of self worth in tact.

The choice is yours. I chose self worth.

Be kind to yourself. ?
Head ^
I really don't know if it's a sign thing (at least, not a sun sign), because I've had the same experience recently from a Pisces (still going through it) and very commonly from Scorpio.

The Pisces surprised me, because my last girlfriend was a Pisces and was borderline obsessed... I would wake up to 4 or 5 messages from her, we'd chat all day, and she would usually fall asleep texting with me. Which, honestly, I kinda liked. But the recent Pisces disappears for weeks at a time, then comes back and acts like everything is normal.

The Scorpio would disappear for months and months at a time, then text me out of the blue and expect to pick things right back up.


The girl that complained about me disappearing (a Libra, I think) was doing exactly that...


I remembered while I was in bed, she was a Cancer, not a Libra. Gorgeous, but hateful as hell and nutty as a fruitcake.
Classic, push pull dynamic sadly.


Can either of you (haylz or Kityy) post a link about what you're talking about? The OP said she googled it and found it, so I'm curious.

I've never seen myself do this, I tend to give exactly what I'm given. So if I'm pushing then it's because you pushed first.

But I AM a Leo/Virgo cusp, so maybe that's more of my Leo side?
Posted by csdude55
Classic, push pull dynamic sadly.


Can either of you (haylz or Kityy) post a link about what you're talking about? The OP said she googled it and found it, so I'm curious.

I've never seen myself do this, I tend to give exactly what I'm given. So if I'm pushing then it's because you pushed first.

But I AM a Leo/Virgo cusp, so maybe that's more of my Leo side?
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I just googles push pull relationships its most likely if you're curious you're the puller not the pusher

Posted by Kityyyyyyy
Do not let this taint your view, for I too have been where you are. You have two choices the way I see it.

1. Put up with the questionable behavior which causes you undue stress and pain or.

2. Walk away, with your held held high, with a bucket load of self worth in tact.

The choice is yours. I chose self worth.

Be kind to yourself. ?
I think option 2 needs to be the one I'm sick of this and I know how much he's talking about me I feel he's making me look stupid and in that case Iv always learnt if someone's 2 faced walk away cos unless you're guessing what they say behind your back correctly it's impossible

Are you a virgo?

Posted by csdude55
I really don't know if it's a sign thing (at least, not a sun sign), because I've had the same experience recently from a Pisces (still going through it) and very commonly from Scorpio.

The Pisces surprised me, because my last girlfriend was a Pisces and was borderline obsessed... I would wake up to 4 or 5 messages from her, we'd chat all day, and she would usually fall asleep texting with me. Which, honestly, I kinda liked. But the recent Pisces disappears for weeks at a time, then comes back and acts like everything is normal.

The Scorpio would disappear for months and months at a time, then text me out of the blue and expect to pick things right back up.


The girl that complained about me disappearing (a Libra, I think) was doing exactly that...


I remembered while I was in bed, she was a Cancer, not a Libra. Gorgeous, but hateful as hell and nutty as a fruitcake.
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Yeah she does sound crazy and that's out of character behaviour for a cancer too!

Like all signs some people act differently to their signs and have traits from their other signs but this really isn't for me. Iv heard of virgos pulling away while they decide what they want but then they don't expect their texts to go unanswered! I'm sorry but if he's going to ignore me for months he need not expect me to rush and text him back I need time too to think about what I want!

I decided my next relationship would be on my terms or atleast for the most part since Iv always catered to other people I thought I deserved it and this definitely isn't that!

I'm sorry but if he's going to ignore me for months he need not expect me to rush and text him back


Astrology aside, from my experience with dating I have to force myself to remember:

If someone wants to talk to you, they will.

If they want to spend time with you, they will.

If they want to be with you, they will.


If they're going for weeks or months without replying, then it means they don't want to talk to you. They're not excited about the conversation, they're not eager to spend time with you. It's really as simple as that.

It's a hard lesson to learn, but don't waste your time and emotions on someone that's not reciprocating.
Posted by haylz124
Posted by Kityyyyyyy
Do not let this taint your view, for I too have been where you are. You have two choices the way I see it.

1. Put up with the questionable behavior which causes you undue stress and pain or.

2. Walk away, with your held held high, with a bucket load of self worth in tact.

The choice is yours. I chose self worth.

Be kind to yourself. ?
I think option 2 needs to be the one I'm sick of this and I know how much he's talking about me I feel he's making me look stupid and in that case Iv always learnt if someone's 2 faced walk away cos unless you're guessing what they say behind your back correctly it's impossible

Are you a virgo?

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I am Scorpio. Dated many Virgos. A lot of push/pull dynamics were in play within those relationships, Some soul destroying. I have learned the lessons, and won't make those same mistakes again. Do what is best for you and your heart. And never settle for behavior that is toxic to you.