I feel played by the virgo

This topic was created in the Virgo forum by Sparky2015 on Tuesday, October 4, 2016 and has 26 replies.
So i met up with my virgo after 10 years everything went well the feels came back and it felt right! Fast forward the next day we were texting and it was ok kind of slow then he stopped texting me! i finally got up the courage to tell him to call me, as soon as he called he picked up the phone he says " you're wondering why i haven't called you or texted you right"? i was like well yea so whats going on, i told him i expected to see him that night and end up being bad but instead it went well. I thought he would be more forward with me since after we saw each other because the chemistry was there! He then says " well i didn't expect the chemistry to be there but it was that was genuine and i didn't put much thought into it after we left. I told you im just a bad texter its nothing personal its just what i do. So then he says i dont know what you hope to gain from this um if you're looking for a romantic thing i would have to say no because ive just got out of a bad relationship and im not ready to get back out there. Im not opposed to us because clearly the attraction is there as it was back then but right not im just enjoying me. I dont want you to feel like im playing you because that's not the case, then someone called him he hung up and said hell call me back and never did.

I guess i just feel weird because all the emotions came back from the past and i know he felt it too but instead of acting on it he's taking steps back! And im so forward and blunt i step up and take the initiative and i get shut down.

is this typical behavior should i just let this go or just do me and see how this plays out!
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im a cancer by the way

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You can't be serious.

....right?
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lol im serious as a heart attack smile
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jesusfuckingchrist
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I don't think he could have been any more straight up with you so the title...I don't even know what to say.
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Posted by Sparky2015
and i know he felt it too
Reality:

Posted by Sparky2015

i dont know what you hope to gain from this um if you're looking for a romantic thing i would have to say no because ive just got out of a bad relationship and im not ready to get back out there.
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it just caught me off guard because when we saw each other he said alot, the exact opposite of what he said on the phone, the only thing i heard was that he did feel something but he's not going to act on it! That's what is weird to me regardless of the whole situation if you feel something and it felt right like he said then why?
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thank you breterpan for you're input i just needed to wrap my head around the situation ,it really could go both ways but i'm hoping its because he's a genuine person!!
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throws hands up in the air and walks away into the sunset ...
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YUPVIRGO ..i felt played because when we were together hes telling me his personal feeling towards me, hes kissing me, hes clinging onto me, and telling me he felt something that he didnt think he'd feel...It wasn't like i was doing this he was. I didnt go to grab his hand he did... Then the next day nada, zilch, Ghost, non existent, we were supposed to see each other the following day and he didnt show and he stopped texting! So yea i sort of feel played by the situation, i react on my feelings and i go for it! I HEARD what it is that he said after the fact that "hes not looking for romance". At the moment i just want to see him more and go from there, but the fact that he saw me and did all that then go home and take steps back im flustered. SO i wanted to hear from other virgos what his thought process is if he said he felt something as well and he wasn't playing me
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tcta while you are walking in that sunset perhaps you'd like to contemplate why you even felt the need to comment in the first place instead of showing how dramatic one can truly be -_-
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That honestly makes sense so i appreciate that, it was mostly my doing for wanting to act on it right off the back but like you said if it doesn't measure in your head i cant control it. So im going to take a huge step back, id like to keep in contact with him as a friend but i think at this point it will probably just register as pathetic to you virgos huh?
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Rommy thank you for your input, and no i'm not saying "im going to take a step back to please anybody" i made the conscious decision that i wanted to hear what he had to say, i put my pride aside by asking him to call me when he was available and i laid everything out on the table! I dont like games and i hope from me and his past he would respect me enough not to bs me. I wasn't asking for anything romantic at the moment i was just asking to see each other often and go from there. I totally agree i did get benched lol but he made it clear to me when he never called back! Like i said in the prior post i really just wanted to know the inner workings of a virgo or what you virgos deemed it!

Im not looking to be viewed as pathetic or the clingy individual.

but thank you once again i appreciate the cut and dry
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tiziani lol that is no problems for me for the simple fact that ive said everything that i had to say in regards to the Feeling department over the phone... there is no question about, i went all in and acted on it.
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Also i didn't have sex with him, just to throw it out there
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Why didn't it work out 10 years ago?
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Benched means put aside. You're out. In a baseball game you strike out then you're benched.


Girl he sounds emotionally retarded and kudos for him to give you a heads up about his baggage. It would be awful to find out the truth later.

Just keep going.
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benched= like watching sports there are players on the sidelines and the coach tags a player in when they are ready to be used @yupvirgo

@LadyNeptune i had to move due to my mom's profession, so we ended the day i had to leave and fell out of touch till recently
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Ghosting is when a person you thought you were in a relationship disappears hoping you take a hint and realize you were dumped. It's pretty cowardly.
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Posted by yupvirgo
Posted by kissmygrits
Ghosting is when a person you thought you were in a relationship disappears hoping you take a hint and realize you were dumped. It's pretty cowardly.
I have no idea how anyone can get confused if they're in a relationship or not.
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Oh it happens.
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Posted by yupvirgo
Posted by Rommy

When your dealing with a Virgo you're dealing with the inner workings of a mind mole, drilling in and out of one thought to the next. The endless reasons are uncountable. A plethora of abandoned thoughts met by actually concrete ideas thoughtfully planned out.

For whatever reason your Virgo found a weakness or a flaw. It's what they do. It's not right. It's not nice. It's just who they are.


This is my second guess.
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Posted by PrettiPisces
Posted by yupvirgo
Posted by Rommy

When your dealing with a Virgo you're dealing with the inner workings of a mind mole, drilling in and out of one thought to the next. The endless reasons are uncountable. A plethora of abandoned thoughts met by actually concrete ideas thoughtfully planned out.

For whatever reason your Virgo found a weakness or a flaw. It's what they do. It's not right. It's not nice. It's just who they are.


This is my second guess.

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Interesting... Are u a Virgo? Seem to be pretty insightful on these mysterious creatures.... So what would be your take on this;

Virgo guy broke things off with me, said he never wanted to see or hear from me again. Months later pops back up and says he's dating someone but misses me and wants to be friends. W/o anything sexual BTW to not complicate things. I reluctantly accepted in hopes that we would at least still hang out like old times, just excluding sex. Thing is, he barely calls( I don't call him, I always all him to reach out first BC I don't want him to feel pressured, as that was one of his complaints bf was that I apply too much pressure) and when he does he will act as though he wants to initiate contact but seems unsure and leery. Then its almost like he will talk himself out of it. But what's the point? Of like being friends why not just move on altogether if you've already admitted to meeting and seeing someone else after the breakup. I know he's hesitant and scared BC a lot a lot of uneventful things took place on my part as well as his too in which I feel he never takes responsibility for his role in the breakup. I tirelessly tried to salvage our relationship, but after several failed attempts, I gave up and stop attempting to contact him. He had a long list of things he didn't like about my character and the overly emotional approach I take on certain situations. It was almost like he was taking a secret inventory on all my faults and every rocky situation that had ever taken place throughout our entire relationship that he basically held me accountable for. I'm thinking in my mind if he felt this strongly about things that happened so long ago why hadn't he made an exit then...??? Now he wants to be friends???? WHY????
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I'm....probably not as forgiving.

OP...a valuable lesson for you. I'm sorry this happened but learn from this and next time...take it slow when an ex all of a sudden pops up out of the blue.

I'll explain in real terms what he did and the behavior isn't sign specific. OP, you got played pure and simple. Because he felt rejected and needed an ego boost, he called the first person he knew would provide that in a nurturing way. Calls, butters you up, shows up, gets what he needs, and then "puts the OP out if her misery" because it's the "human thing to do"...which is laughable. No, the human and decent thing to do would've been to tell you his situation before you met up with him so you'd be properly prepared...but no if he did that....you'd have your guard up and he'd be less likely to get what he wanted. Hence the convenient line "oh by the way I just got out if a bad relationship" and he tells you after the fact. The purpose of that is fir you to give him the benefit of the doubt and he gets to protect his image. Most likely, that was his new "comfort zone" calling when he got off the phone with you.

Like I said, I'm really sorry this happened but you have to be practical when it comes to people. Good luck
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Posted by PrettiPisces
Posted by PrettiPisces
Posted by yupvirgo
Posted by Rommy

When your dealing with a Virgo you're dealing with the inner workings of a mind mole, drilling in and out of one thought to the next. The endless reasons are uncountable. A plethora of abandoned thoughts met by actually concrete ideas thoughtfully planned out.

For whatever reason your Virgo found a weakness or a flaw. It's what they do. It's not right. It's not nice. It's just who they are.


This is my second guess.



Interesting... Are u a Virgo? Seem to be pretty insightful on these mysterious creatures.... So what would be your take on this;

Virgo guy broke things off with me, said he never wanted to see or hear from me again. Months later pops back up and says he's dating someone but misses me and wants to be friends. W/o anything sexual BTW to not complicate things. I reluctantly accepted in hopes that we would at least still hang out like old times, just excluding sex. Thing is, he barely calls( I don't call him, I always all him to reach out first BC I don't want him to feel pressured, as that was one of his complaints bf was that I apply too much pressure) and when he does he will act as though he wants to initiate contact but seems unsure and leery. Then its almost like he will talk himself out of it. But what's the point? Of like being friends why not just move on altogether if you've already admitted to meeting and seeing someone else after the breakup. I know he's hesitant and scared BC a lot a lot of uneventful things took place on my part as well as his too in which I feel he never takes responsibility for his role in the breakup. I tirelessly tried to salvage our relationship, but after several failed attempts, I gave up and stop attempting to contact him. He had a long list of things he didn't like about my character and the overly emotional approach I take on certain situations. It was almost like he was taking a secret inventory on all my faults and every rocky situation that had ever taken place throughout our entire relationship that he basically held me accountable for. I'm thinking in my mind if he felt this strongly about things that happened so long ago why hadn't he made an exit then...??? Now he wants to be friends???? WHY????
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Hey girl!!! I just want to let you know your virguy still has feelings for you. Trust me, I've been studying Virgos for the past two decades. Him wanting to be friends again is his way of reconnecting with you. All that time while away might have been spent on improving himself. Remember Virgo's not only analyze other but also themselves. Either way this is a something you should definitely pursue but you need answers first. Relationships with Virgos can be quite magical, if you learn how to tame one....
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@ starwars no im fine, i wanted a genuine response and i got it! I haven't reached out to him for the people that has doubted me lol, but you win some and you lose some.
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