I was a Virguy's other woman and never knew it : (

Oh boy...any insight is welcome here.

Background: I was seeing a Virgo man for the last year. I am Cancer. We have had insane chemistry since our first meeting. It was an ideal relationship for me because I work a lot of hours and don't have a lot of time to devote to a serious relationship. We would manage to meet up sometimes a couple of times a month, sometimes less. He owns his own business, so the lack of time together didn't seem odd-it just made the time we had together that much better.

Well-color me stupid-because after we saw each other a few weeks ago-his WIFE called me. I never saw it coming. I really trusted this guy. I have trust issues to start with but I never felt any sense that he was lying to me, ever. I can not begin to tell you the pain this has all caused me. I have been angry, hurt, confused. I went through a divorce because my ex was unfaithful. We did the whole counseling thing...but after a year I realized that I didn't want to live with someone who would do that to me. Now, here I am-the other woman. I have not seen him since...but we have spoken/emailed.

I am so confused...now I question my own judgement about people. I used to pride myself on having good intuition about people. I really believed him when he shared his feelings and told me he loved me. He wasn't open by nature but we talked all the time, about everything. Physically...it was the best. I don't know how to move on from this. Any advice? Thanks.

Well, the two of you could've talked about eveything because you didn't know he was married.

I'm sorry Bulmoon 😢 I've been there before too, but my relationship with the guy wasn't that long -- thank god.

You need to break all ties with him, leave him be, don't answer his phone calls, his text messages, emails, nothing. If he wants to talk, avoid, do not let him pull you back in.

"I don't know how to move on from this."


If you don't know how to move on from this, then in your mind, you will have lingering doubts ... telling you that maybe he was being sincere with you and perhaps he really wants to get away from wife to be with you.

When people are in doubt, while the writing is clearly on the wall .. is essentially a set-up for ourselves to take a leap in which our good senses tell us is WRONG. This is human.

So, my advice to walk away from this is to program in your mind that you CAN MOVE ON .. tell yourself every second, make it reality.

Thank you for responding. I am lucky to have some great friends IRL but sometimes I need an unbiased view of my situation...and your responses really were the kick in the rear that I needed. It still really sucks...but what's done, is done and I CAN move on. It is just a matter of sticking to my resolve.

Wish me strength : ) Right now I am feeling like I could kick his ass! lol. Thanks again...it is appreciated.