Scorpio friend hurting me and Virgos flirtation?

This topic was created in the Virgo forum by aprilkitten on Monday, May 6, 2013 and has 6 replies.
OK, I don't know this Virgo very well, he lives about an hour away from me, and we've been talking as friends since December. But, I'm really starting to like him. And, I feel like he's opening up more and more to me, too. It's a very fun "every conversation gets a little deeper" experience that I've never encountered. I love getting close FAST and I usually dig the guys who chase me...and I feel like Virgo is chasing a bit...but in a discrete way. And it drives me crazy. smile I mean, he told me he remembers what I post on Twitter, and wishes me sweet dreams and says things like "My week needs more AprilKitten in it!" He's interested, right? And, I??m hoping the distance is what??s causing things to go slower than I??d like. Sad

Well, because Virgo??s a super busy college student and lives an hour away, I usually tell him, ???Let me know when you??re in town so we can see each other!?? He always excitedly agrees...yet never makes plans. Instead, I??ve been out a number of weekends with our mutual friend, a Scorpio, and Virgo magically appears, too. ???Aren??t you glad to see me!?? Yes, he??s a very good surprise. Lol. So Scorpio is our middle man when it comes to meeting in person. Ugh, this all feels so pathetic now that I'm typing it out! But, I??ll take what I can when it comes to him.
So Scorpio is our mutual friend. Me and Virgo even met through Scorpio...he invited both of us to a hometown Christmas party, but they weren't on very good terms at the time. They had a falling out (I don't know about what, but it was evidently very personal, and Scorpio's fault.) So Scorpio has been trying to make it up to Virgo ever since. Because I'm old friends (old, not close) with Scorpio, I felt for him. I thought, ???Oh, he misses his friend.?? And, as self-centered as it sounds, I feel like I??ve been helping reconcile their friendship because we all go out together in a group.
Well, lately, I think our Middle-Man Scorpio friend is making it seem like I'm ditching Virgo. I hadn??t seen Virgo in weeks, and when we finally saw each other he asked me "What happened to you on Friday??? and Scorpio interpreted saying I had to work. I had no clue what they were talking about, but actually did have work, so didn??t ask if he thought I had been invited to something.
Then this week I mentioned in conversation to Scorpio that I was going to a dinner with a couple of my friends from college, and he invited himself because he said he wanted to see the band that was playing. I thought, ???Weird, but ok. The more the merrier.?? He mentioned it on facebook, started tweeting me about it, and I kinda felt like it was for show. Why make such a big deal about hanging out? Scorpio texts me on Saturday "We still on?" I explain no, I had a family dinner, so he just responds "Oh, ok." This Scorpio NEVER responds so shortly. Next thing I know, Virgo and Scorpio are heading out by themselves to the exact same restaurant! Now, I totally would've stop by to catch up with my Virgo, I only get to see him on weekends because of his schoolwork. Am I being --ck-blocked?!
So basically, I want Virgo to be assertive and ask me out and stop relying on Mr. Scorpio! I don??t want Scorpio to play middle man because I think he??s using it to his own advantage because he wants to be close friends again with Virgo. Which I totally get, he's awesome. Lol. But, if Virgo really liked me, wouldn??t he text me and ask why I??m not joining them? Wouldn??t he just ask me out? Is he really that trusting to listen to Scorpio, who has a history of lying to friends? Or am I just being strung along, and Virgo isn??t sincerely into me? Ugh. I??m so confused.
Why would 2 men need a female mediator unless they are Gay, having some kind of intimate relationship. To be clear, I don't have an issue with a man being Gay but the way you describe the situation seems a bit off.
He's discreetly flirting with you and my question is...Why? Why would a heterosexual male do that, that's not typical behavior.
" So Scorpio has been trying to make it up to Virgo ever since"
That's what lovers do not straight men, usually they just let it go and move on from it and if it's discussed it's usually a quick discussion. The making up part hmmm. The whole make up factor sends up a red flag for me.
"Because I'm old friends (old, not close) with Scorpio, I felt for him. I thought, ???Oh, he misses his friend.??"
hmmmm again who does that...What heterosexual male pines for another man.
"Well, lately, I think our Middle-Man Scorpio friend is making it seem like I'm ditching Virgo. "
Why? Why would he do that unless he's JEALOUS of your relationship with the Virgo. No reason to throw shade your way like that unless he's competing with you.
"He mentioned it on facebook, started tweeting me about it, and I kinda felt like it was for show. "
Of course it was for show...For the Scorpio. Yeeesh
"Next thing I know, Virgo and Scorpio are heading out by themselves to the exact same restaurant! "
HELLO!! Have you figured this out by now.
"So basically, I want Virgo to be assertive and ask me out and stop relying on Mr. Scorpio! I don??t want Scorpio to play middle man because I think he??s using it to his own advantage because he wants to be close friends again with Virgo."
Why would he need you to make him be close again to Virgo? Unless you're okay dating a man that is into men this whole close thing does not sound right.
A heterosexual male will ditch his friend just to be with you, not use you as a back up plan.
He's not asking you out because maybe he's closer with the Scorpio and doesn't want to ruffle the Virgos feather into a jealous frenzy. I'm sure they won't admit to having some kind of intimate relationship together. I'd bail out on the both of them let them both alone for awhile and go date someone who is willing to display his interest in PUBLIC towards you and not on the down low.
Posted by aprilkitten
... I feel like he's opening up more and more to me, too. It's a very fun "every conversation gets a little deeper" experience that I've never encountered.




Really? So, if you've never encountered the experience where two people get closer and closer with each conversation, as they are attempting to bond into a new relation with each other .... then how have you been doing it in the past?
You just blurt out your whole life in one long run-on sentence?

The next post isn't going to be read by me ..... the first two sentences was enough for me to realize that you're reaching, which I fully know if I read further, I'll find you describing your desperation.
Thanks for the advice! It helped me see the picture a bit more clearly. So, I'll back off of the Virgo. If he wants to ask me out, he will. If not, at last I have a new twitter follower. haha. And, I'll just decline my Scorpio friend's invitations to go out for a while. Step back from it all!
Posted by aprilkitten
Thanks for the advice! It helped me see the picture a bit more clearly. So, I'll back off of the Virgo. If he wants to ask me out, he will. If not, at last I have a new twitter follower. haha. And, I'll just decline my Scorpio friend's invitations to go out for a while. Step back from it all!


Good decision. Observe them more carefully and you'll actually see the answer for yourself. No more mediating and being the go between the 2 of them, grown heterosexual men don't need mediating. They can work out their problems themselves together if they desire to do that. Don't allow yourself to be strung along, you deserve more and better than that.