ladyin_blue
@ladyin_blue
10 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 8 · Topics: 1
Virgo cast a spell
Posted by ladyin_blue
Ello, ello, ello
I was going through a hard time
Explain this hard time exactly.
If this hard time was actually hard time...then he isn't into you. I don't know any Virgo that would abandon a partner or flake on them when they are going through a hard time. It's when we are right there in the trenches with you.
But if this hard time is something overblown and dramatic and not a hard time at all, I would avoid it completely and "be busy".
There are some contradictions in your post too. You say you make men work for it..which to me says you're not into reciprocity. That is a huge problem with Virgos. Then you say you never let emotions interfere withr your judgement but you strike me as emotionally needy.
I see a strong sexual infatuation you're mistaking with love. The way you describe this is more lalaland than real life partnership.
You said his "disappearing acts" never lasted more than a day. That's not a disappearing act, it's being alive and having other things to take care of. But by the way you called that a disappearing act...I feel you are very demanding in general. In which case his 2 weeks disappearance might've been his way of cutting this fling short.
It would depend on that hard time you had vs his troubles with his family.
The need you asked of him and the lack of response on the virgo is a red flag.
Either he is not that interested or something happened between you two that, on one hand is to small to take into consideration but to the virgo is a big deal and needs time to think.
Either he is not that interested or something happened between you two that, on one hand is to small to take into consideration but to the virgo is a big deal and needs time to think.
hi Damnata thanks for your reply
I wouldn't be surprised if it was infatuation.
to go from messaging every hour (even at work) except to sleep every day to nothing for a whole day, I call it disappearing. first day found it weird but realised its just how he handles stress. I guess it didn't help that we both came into each others lives during a difficult time and were using each other as a distraction.
both our problems are family. mine parents and him sibling. i didn't tell him what the latest drama was from my side, just that i was having it hard and could use some tlc. he did tell me the latest drama from his side a few days before and how fed up he was with it. that was the last real convo we had. after that he was distant.
I wouldn't be surprised if it was infatuation.
to go from messaging every hour (even at work) except to sleep every day to nothing for a whole day, I call it disappearing. first day found it weird but realised its just how he handles stress. I guess it didn't help that we both came into each others lives during a difficult time and were using each other as a distraction.
both our problems are family. mine parents and him sibling. i didn't tell him what the latest drama was from my side, just that i was having it hard and could use some tlc. he did tell me the latest drama from his side a few days before and how fed up he was with it. that was the last real convo we had. after that he was distant.
hi weeds.
maybe. he did tell me a few times if we were ever to break up he would tell me, he wouldn't just vanish.
maybe. he did tell me a few times if we were ever to break up he would tell me, he wouldn't just vanish.
Posted by ladyin_blueMy thought process on how a partner would bring it up to me..
hi Damnata thanks for your reply
i didn't tell him what the latest drama was from my side, just that i was having it hard and could use some tlc. he did tell me the latest drama from his side a few days before and how fed up he was with it. that was the last real convo we had. after that he was distant.
Partner : Hey I need TLC. I'm having it tough these days.
Me: What happened?
Partner: I need TLC.
*me putting your issue on the shelf because it seems you have no real trouble since you won't share*
You also mention he opened up to you about some issues in his life a couple of days before. Did you show any support for it? Because if I am struggling with something in my life and someone just needs TLC without bringing up what's happening in theirs, then I will focus on my issue and not your TLC.
I'd like to know how many times you contacted him. At the beginning you mentioned you don't chase guys, make them hard to work bla bla..and if he went from messaging every hour to nothing...maybe somewhere along the way you were only reciprocating 1/10 of his efforts. If that is how it went, it's a very high possibility you got relocated to fwb zone. Virgos want partners that reciprocate.
Hi Ladyin....
Weeds & Damnata are both correct. The last guy I dated was a Taurus, both of us had our own issues, which caused a split on his end for 6 months then we reconnected, few months later a split on my end for 8 months, then we reconnected for a few more months. This last split has been on my end for the past few months because he slipped up and said "I'm keeping you no matter what you say!" (typical Taurus possessed behavior). He doesn't know that's why I've shut down because I never communicated it and just silently backed away with no comms (not a huge fan of being "told" I'm anyone's property!). He's smart though so he either figured it out, got more problems of his own to deal with, or just figured me "distancing" myself is normal behavior on my part, and hasn't bothered me as of yet. He knew I would be out of town for a couple months as well and unavailable, so it could be a bit of all of it. Not saying this is even similar to what ur going thru with ur Virgo, except in the fact that us Virgos sometimes will detach w/out comms to avoid a dramatic exit, especially if we're already going thru some stressful stuff of our own. And even if we let a person get a "sneak-peek" into our lives...they may feel they've been let in, but we're the only ones who know they're really not let ALL the way in and will still slice precisely. Alot of us Virgos are extremely private people because it helps keep things organized & controlled...suffice to say....less people = less risk = less drama. One thing's for sure though, once we detach....which in ur case it "seems" like he has though....u are not going to be able to force him to "re-attach" no matter how much u "charge" in as a bull. IF he decides to do it, it will be on his own accord & in his own time.
Weeds & Damnata are both correct. The last guy I dated was a Taurus, both of us had our own issues, which caused a split on his end for 6 months then we reconnected, few months later a split on my end for 8 months, then we reconnected for a few more months. This last split has been on my end for the past few months because he slipped up and said "I'm keeping you no matter what you say!" (typical Taurus possessed behavior). He doesn't know that's why I've shut down because I never communicated it and just silently backed away with no comms (not a huge fan of being "told" I'm anyone's property!). He's smart though so he either figured it out, got more problems of his own to deal with, or just figured me "distancing" myself is normal behavior on my part, and hasn't bothered me as of yet. He knew I would be out of town for a couple months as well and unavailable, so it could be a bit of all of it. Not saying this is even similar to what ur going thru with ur Virgo, except in the fact that us Virgos sometimes will detach w/out comms to avoid a dramatic exit, especially if we're already going thru some stressful stuff of our own. And even if we let a person get a "sneak-peek" into our lives...they may feel they've been let in, but we're the only ones who know they're really not let ALL the way in and will still slice precisely. Alot of us Virgos are extremely private people because it helps keep things organized & controlled...suffice to say....less people = less risk = less drama. One thing's for sure though, once we detach....which in ur case it "seems" like he has though....u are not going to be able to force him to "re-attach" no matter how much u "charge" in as a bull. IF he decides to do it, it will be on his own accord & in his own time.
interesting.
the messages actually went
me: tired, going through a hard time, could use some TLC
him: busy
me: Ok
was upset at first but let it be but lost myself in a book. didn't message him again that day. When he wanted to talks a few days before i was all ears and support.
normally i start contact first caz my day starts earlier then his. 5 messages down the line he then wakes up and joins me.. on days that i'm busy and haven't messaged him he'll message me and i reply.
the day after that i messaged him as usual in the morning with something funny i heard. i only sent him the 1 and i got no reply. few days later sent him a message saying hi and still nothing. a few days after that i figured he must be going through a tough time so i sent him a txt with his fav things he likes to hear and decided to leave it at that. if he wants to get in touch he knows my num and address.
we've been together 8 months and even though we disagree from time to time and had 1 fight 2 months back, we've never broken up. hes the one who says "i own you, your mine", "i love you, your my best friend" and "i'm letting you in, i'm trusting you, dont hurt me. i dont like having my walls up around you"
i want to give him the benefit of the doubt. told him last month i was gonna be busy from this week till end of july so i wont be in touch much. will see what happens after. in the mean time the distance will do me good.
Lovelyisis i dont like messy exits either. i do the same, distance myself till we drift apart. hmmm could he be doing that? if he was im sure he wouldn't of told me he loved me 4 days before he vanished
.is this normal Virgo behaviour?
Posted by Lovelyisis
He doesn't know that's why I've shut down because I never communicated it and just silently backed away with no comms ....
...they may feel they've been let in, but we're the only ones who know they're really not let ALL the way in
I cannot detect any tone from you in where you realize that this is a very bad quality. In fact, it sounds like it's so normal to you, that you have no clue how terrible it is.
And the New-Dense-Taurus to dxp is also so clueless in how terrible that is ... that she agrees with you, proudly.
Dude .... you're a dickhead. You believe it's appropriate to leave the person in whom you made to believe you could be trusted ... in the dark.
In the dark, without a word, nor a care, apparently from the way you worded it.
So, you will lead them to believe something false, and then once you've got them bared all to you ..... you hang them.
Posted by P-AngelPAngel....and ur a bitter old lonely simp that is in desperate need of a good royal f**** or just a "life" PERIOD! Ur the type of old gal that is only good at one thing and one thing only..."sideline cheerleader telling a quarterback how to play his/her position"....can see ur silly a** comin from a mile away....LOL! Move around heffa and stay in ur own lane...getting the hell outta mine before u get ran the f*** ova w/out even a look back! F*** I forgot...u don't even have a dam lane of ur own...always in someone else's!!! Gotta love sideline chickenheads...LOL! First and last time I "ever" address u on dxp little girl! 😉Posted by Lovelyisis
He doesn't know that's why I've shut down because I never communicated it and just silently backed away with no comms ....
...they may feel they've been let in, but we're the only ones who know they're really not let ALL the way in
I cannot detect any tone from you in where you realize that this is a very bad quality. In fact, it sounds like it's so normal to you, that you have no clue how terrible it is.
And the New-Dense-Taurus to dxp is also so clueless in how terrible that is ... that she agrees with you, proudly.
Dude .... you're a dickhead. You believe it's appropriate to leave the person in whom you made to believe you could be trusted ... in the dark.
In the dark, without a word, nor a care, apparently from the way you worded it.
So, you will lead them to believe something false, and then once you've got them bared all to you ..... you hang them.click to expand
P-Angel everyone is different. what is terrible to you might not be terrible to someone else and what is acceptable to some is not acceptable to others. i see nothing terrible in what Lovelyisis said. i myself am a the same except i do say hi and bye.
Dense, dickhead, anything else?
You can think of it negatively but i'd rather give him the benefit of the doubt and believe he needs some time for him. if a person i'm with handles stress by shutting everyone out then i'll support him by being there when hes back. that's his way of dealing with things, who am i to tell him otherwise? and he does the same for me. if he is being a jerk and this is his way of letting me go then hes done me a favour. either way, i'll live. but i'm gonna take his word that he wouldn't disappear out of my life. hes given me no reasons to not trust him and has always stuck by his word so far.
i just wanted to know if this is normal virgo behaviour.
Dense, dickhead, anything else?
You can think of it negatively but i'd rather give him the benefit of the doubt and believe he needs some time for him. if a person i'm with handles stress by shutting everyone out then i'll support him by being there when hes back. that's his way of dealing with things, who am i to tell him otherwise? and he does the same for me. if he is being a jerk and this is his way of letting me go then hes done me a favour. either way, i'll live. but i'm gonna take his word that he wouldn't disappear out of my life. hes given me no reasons to not trust him and has always stuck by his word so far.
i just wanted to know if this is normal virgo behaviour.
Posted by ladyin_blueOh my to all of this. Now I do understand giving the benefit of the doubt to someone we really like and care about. We all do it. It's human nature. But looking in from an outside perspective to what you wrote, I would assume it may be over. I've heard virgos say if they're really serious and all in to the person, the distance never occurs. Especially not weeks like that. You need to decide if him treating you like this is acceptable to you. Especially if you're looking for something long term from him. I personally have been through this s
interesting.
the messages actually went
me: tired, going through a hard time, could use some TLC
him: busy
me: Ok
was upset at first but let it be but lost myself in a book. didn't message him again that day. When he wanted to talks a few days before i was all ears and support.
normally i start contact first caz my day starts earlier then his. 5 messages down the line he then wakes up and joins me.. on days that i'm busy and haven't messaged him he'll message me and i reply.
the day after that i messaged him as usual in the morning with something funny i heard. i only sent him the 1 and i got no reply. few days later sent him a message saying hi and still nothing. a few days after that i figured he must be going through a tough time so i sent him a txt with his fav things he likes to hear and decided to leave it at that. if he wants to get in touch he knows my num and address.
we've been together 8 months and even though we disagree from time to time and had 1 fight 2 months back, we've never broken up. hes the one who says "i own you, your mine", "i love you, your my best friend" and "i'm letting you in, i'm trusting you, dont hurt me. i dont like having my walls up around you"
i want to give him the benefit of the doubt. told him last month i was gonna be busy from this week till end of july so i wont be in touch much. will see what happens after. in the mean time the distance will do me good.
Lovelyisis i dont like messy exits either. i do the same, distance myself till we drift apart. hmmm could he be doing that? if he was im sure he wouldn't of told me he loved me 4 days before he vanished
.is this normal Virgo behaviour?
Sorry it cut off. But here's the full thing -
Oh my to all of this. Now I do understand giving the benefit of the doubt to someone we really like and care about. We all do it. It's human nature. But looking in from an outside perspective to what you wrote, I would assume it may be over. I've heard virgos say if they're really serious and all in to the person, the distance never occurs. Especially not weeks like that. You need to decide if him treating you like this is acceptable to you. Especially if you're looking for something long term from him. I personally have been through this same type of thing with a virgo myself, and I know it's stressful. You're constantly questioning your place in their life.
Also, If I woke up to 5 text messages from one person every day, and it was not an emergency, I would back off too. And I'm a woman!!!! You may not think you're needy, but you're coming off that way. Also if I was ignored twice in a row by someone I was dealing with romantically, I'd be done. That's unacceptable for anyone unless they have died or been in the hospital. He's not that busy to not say anything back at all. That's just being rude.
Oh my to all of this. Now I do understand giving the benefit of the doubt to someone we really like and care about. We all do it. It's human nature. But looking in from an outside perspective to what you wrote, I would assume it may be over. I've heard virgos say if they're really serious and all in to the person, the distance never occurs. Especially not weeks like that. You need to decide if him treating you like this is acceptable to you. Especially if you're looking for something long term from him. I personally have been through this same type of thing with a virgo myself, and I know it's stressful. You're constantly questioning your place in their life.
Also, If I woke up to 5 text messages from one person every day, and it was not an emergency, I would back off too. And I'm a woman!!!! You may not think you're needy, but you're coming off that way. Also if I was ignored twice in a row by someone I was dealing with romantically, I'd be done. That's unacceptable for anyone unless they have died or been in the hospital. He's not that busy to not say anything back at all. That's just being rude.
Thanks guys. if what you guys are saying is true i'd rather move on. my situation has FINALLY concluded, i got the job I wanted in another state. the distance will do me and my parents good. As for him, it was fun while it lasted and wish him the best with his situation.
Posted by Lovelyisis
He doesn't know that's why I've shut down because I never communicated it and just silently backed away with no comms
..... the fact that us Virgos sometimes will detach w/out comms to avoid a dramatic exit, especially if we're already going thru some stressful stuff of our own.
..... they may feel they've been let in, but we're the only ones who know they're really not let ALL the way in .....
You're such a pretender, fake.
You present yourself in dxp like a decent person ... when in reality, you're a terrible person who does the above without any regards to how the other person feels.
You would have to have presence of mind to realize, which you have neither ..... 99% of all relationship issues we hear about in here revolve around a person being left in the dark, without communication in knowing how the other feels, or where they stand.
You are the epitome of douche bag, especially considering that you proudly where it like it's an honor. You are the very type of Virgo that people come in here complaining about. But, you're prancing around, proud of it .... completely clueless that it's a horrible quality.
The bright side is that there are actually good Virgos out there, regardless of how bad you are.
Join the Conversation. Explore Yourself. Connect with Others.
Discover insights, swap stories, and find people. dxpnet is where experiences turn into understanding.
Create Your Free Account →Related Topics
...and posting tirades of self entitlement and massive ego on this forums. (The genuine crowd need not be concerned with
Ever since falling pregnant Virgo has been on and off with me just for no reason, she's cut me off then come back in to
Virgos, I'd like to hear about how it went down the first time you told the person you were dating that you loved them
..figure out a good present for her Leo cousin. My Leo cousin is coming to Romania for 3 weeks..I haven't seen her in
Hi everyone, I m new to this site and for the past few days i have been reading a lot about Virgos, I never thought i wo
Do you like public displays of affection? Idk, i was hanging with this scorp sun/Libra moon dude n he was all over me. K
So effortlessly angelic looking. And calm. It's something I always wanted to achieve. That's all I gotta say lol!
Mine isn't :(
I recently posted Tortured by a Virgo topic. Now Im certain by his attitude now that I made him feel unwanted in some wa
Its my first time ever writing on internet groups for help. But reading other people made me realise I should reach out
More specifically, what makes me so unlovable? Why are we crazy? Why do we bring out the crazy in others? *sigh* I'm
Lets talk about Mom Virgos!
Ok so it's been said that Virgos are unemotional and uncomfortable with emotional displays. Can you elaborate? For insta
Michael Jackson Beyonc_? Pink Nick Jonas LeAnn Rimes who else?
true or false?
They look so cold and unemotional people (I know they are not this way but still) and I wonder how they feel passion? I
What does it mean when virgo says he wants kids with me and get married? Does it mean he thinks I'm the one? (We are tog
First let me say I am a Virgo Sun...Cancer Moon...Cancer Ascendant. Flashback....1st true love was a Taurus, May 13th
What does this mean? I've read on here a lot to mirror the Virgo in your life. To what end? What is this looking to acco
Help me build my reaction gif repository? If you do, I'll give out that rare Capricorn Affection people suffer withdraw
how are you lovely people?
I've been browsing this section of the message board with interest for a few days now. i'm amazed at the number of people with Virgo relationship problems, esp with virgo guys. lol thought why be left out.
I'm a Taurus with moon in Virgo. i'm strong (stubborn as my parents call it), careful, dont chase guys, any guy who does want in has to work for it and I never let emotions interfere with my judgment. ..... *sigh* until he came along. my first Virgo. never has a man captured me the way this guy has. Theres just something about him that demands attention. to say i'm smitten is an understatement. theres an internal fight going on between my head, my heart and .... my vagina. My head hates the spell this virgo has over me, i'm not one to chase guys nor am I clingy, needy or over emotional yet he brings this out of me. I haaaattee it.... yet my heart wont let him go, no doubt i'm in love. I feel like this is karma biting me in the ass for all the hearts I've broken over the years. My... *ahem* mini me, refuses to let go, she claims no guy can take care of her the way this guy can, mans got skills, she wouldn't mind chaining him to a bed and keeping him forever :p
From his side, he says he feels the same way but I guess has a different way of showing it. for example I've learnt he shows his love by being there, by letting me in, letting me see a side to him that he closes off from everyone else. I even started to get used to his disappearing acts but they were normally for a day and he always got in touch after and tells me all about it. I do find him emotionally distant when hes not with me, is that a virgo thing?
so whats my problem, i'm a fool in love and no doubt emotions are clouding my judgment, is this normal or should I close my heart, tell mini me to shut up and move on.... its been over 2 weeks since his latest disappearing act. haven't heard anything from him. before he disappeared I was going through a hard time and needed some TLC.. he said he was busy, asked him for a little, for comfort and again, said hes busy, that whole week he was distant and when ever i'd ask whats up he'd say busy so I let him be.... haven't heard a thing. last words to me was "i'm busy"
oh and he was stressed about his family. normally when theyre stressing him that's when he vanishes for a day but 2 weeks with no idea when hes gonna surface?
any thoughts on my plight?