Virgos are you really that sensitive? Help please
This topic was created in the Virgo forum by takahashi09 on Saturday, August 10, 2013 and has 27 replies.
Whoa. I always understand when this Virgo couldn't respond to me when he's busy.
We have separate lives, far away from each other, though, we're real close.
We do not talk everyday, but we don't lose our connection.
Every time that we spent to talk was always a quality time. It's really good and full of sense.
This guy is a secretive kind of guy. He doesn't share most of his feelings. He's a typical virgo, can turn hot and cold, close and distant. I'm kind of used to it already. But lately he's been opening up to me, telling me he was really sad because of the death of his grandma, it's like he accepted my invitation for a company, I guess he really needed me, needed someone to lean on that time. Then we really were getting along afterwards. He's appreciative, open, and happy more than even.
There was a time when he initiated a conversation, like he was really excited and in the mood to talk...but I indirectly told him that I was busy, he got it and said that I should continue with what I was doing. I was glad because I thought to myself, oh he understands me, too, this time that I'm busy. That's great. The timing was really wrong for the first time(with me doing something, because it was always okay if I initiated and he was busy that time so we would just catch up some later time, that was the case) so I really didn't compromise just to talk to him. Maybe next time. And considering it was his exams week that time I wondered why he wanted to talk to me, usually we talk before exams week, not during the week.
And now he's not talking to me again. He won't reply. Didn't talk to me for a week. I respected that so here I am living my life, and also not texting him for a week now. Texted him yesterday, no response. I say to myself, he'll come back, because he always does. It will just really take time.
But I really was wondering if he felt rejected, or if was that really a big of a deal? I guess not. Hehe. But I don't know for Virguys, but I want to understand.
We have separate lives, far away from each other, though, we're real close.
We do not talk everyday, but we don't lose our connection.
Every time that we spent to talk was always a quality time. It's really good and full of sense.
This guy is a secretive kind of guy. He doesn't share most of his feelings. He's a typical virgo, can turn hot and cold, close and distant. I'm kind of used to it already. But lately he's been opening up to me, telling me he was really sad because of the death of his grandma, it's like he accepted my invitation for a company, I guess he really needed me, needed someone to lean on that time. Then we really were getting along afterwards. He's appreciative, open, and happy more than even.
There was a time when he initiated a conversation, like he was really excited and in the mood to talk...but I indirectly told him that I was busy, he got it and said that I should continue with what I was doing. I was glad because I thought to myself, oh he understands me, too, this time that I'm busy. That's great. The timing was really wrong for the first time(with me doing something, because it was always okay if I initiated and he was busy that time so we would just catch up some later time, that was the case) so I really didn't compromise just to talk to him. Maybe next time. And considering it was his exams week that time I wondered why he wanted to talk to me, usually we talk before exams week, not during the week.
And now he's not talking to me again. He won't reply. Didn't talk to me for a week. I respected that so here I am living my life, and also not texting him for a week now. Texted him yesterday, no response. I say to myself, he'll come back, because he always does. It will just really take time.
But I really was wondering if he felt rejected, or if was that really a big of a deal? I guess not. Hehe. But I don't know for Virguys, but I want to understand.
Posted by VirgoFlirt
REJECTED
I co-sign this.
I am feeling the pain he felt when you rejected him.
I know it hurts so bad and I feel it and will do exactly what he did.
Silent sanctuary.
Yes, they are sensitive. As silly as it is he felt rejected. Some virgos are self centered. Their feelings easily get hurt when something does not go the way the want. They forget about what you did for them b/c they are focused on how they feel at that present moment. While its good to be able to understand their fragile feelings, it also requires a lot of patience b/c it can get tiresome. As far as a week of no communication that's beyond sensitivity, thats ust plain rude. My ex never pulled no stunt like that feelings hurt and all. If I was you I'd address it before it becomes a habbit that leads to a bigger issue.
He felt rejected. He's trying to possibly get you to pursue himso he doesn't have to get rejected twice. We don't know the whole story but if you make someone feel less significant than they want to feel, and there's Virgo in them, the likely thought he had was, "excuse me... Sorry to bother you and take up your time. Maybe i shouldn't have let you in in the first place because I trusted you and now I have to follow your rules as to when we talk? You're busy? I'll show you busy."
Sorry, but you asked.
Best advice I can give you, start to show him you'll put him first and make him #1. Ask about things that really matter. Dump heart into an email. If nothing works, you may have pushed him away and he may be too proud to tell you that you hurt him.
Sorry, but you asked.
Best advice I can give you, start to show him you'll put him first and make him #1. Ask about things that really matter. Dump heart into an email. If nothing works, you may have pushed him away and he may be too proud to tell you that you hurt him.
I wear my heart on my sleeve so I can't relate with the whole secretive thing. I will say that timing is everything.
Usually if I want to share something like that, the timing has to be right. If it doesn't feel right, I'll wait until it does.
Usually if I want to share something like that, the timing has to be right. If it doesn't feel right, I'll wait until it does.
Wrong time? She had shit to do. Time does not revolve around this man.
Posted by VirgoFlirt
Here is the real problem that people don't get:
You do anything to help someone then, you get zero help back.
He confided in you about his latent feelings. This is where he give you the time, day and place to marry him of your choosing, right there. You were his to be wife?, most likely in his eyes. You refused to help him, at the wrong time. I did say wrong time there.
That is why there is zero communication from him. It's not looking to good for you at all.
I think that time that he initiated the conversation, it was just some light talk, and light approach that he did there. He was positive and all, and I think there was no helping issue that time, just some, normal talk, chitchat he was trying to have with me.
And yes Eula, that was an important stuff, I was actually doing some computer program together with my friends back then so I think its "reasonable enough" to not talk at the moment.
And again, he said with a "smile" to me, to me that oh you're doing something right now why are you still talking to me, go on and continue that already.
I took it positively. Right?
Then ... that was it he slowly replied to my texts until(seemed a bit aloof)... no response, after a week, still none.
I want to catch up,hopefully, but it's like he's not letting me. Maybe I did really hurt his feelings...unintentionally.
I think he should've understood me and my situation that time. 
I've always wanted to talk to him, and I really missed him, but it was okay for me not to talk, back then, since we're getting along very well and I'm contented with it. In short, I felt secured.
I was doing my thing, and he was doing his, I thought he must have been really busy reviewing for his exams that time, that was why I didn't expect us to talk, and , and it's... fine. really fine i know we're okay and we're going to talk soon... The thing is...It was sooner than I expected.
And he seemed to react way too much. :/
I've always wanted to talk to him, and I really missed him, but it was okay for me not to talk, back then, since we're getting along very well and I'm contented with it. In short, I felt secured.
I was doing my thing, and he was doing his, I thought he must have been really busy reviewing for his exams that time, that was why I didn't expect us to talk, and , and it's... fine. really fine i know we're okay and we're going to talk soon... The thing is...It was sooner than I expected.
And he seemed to react way too much. :/
If his feelings were hurt his 1 week of MIA is no excuse! All I'm saying is if you two do reconnect, address it. If you don't this man is going to make you feel guilty anytime you do something to hurt his "wittle" feelings and it won't take much.
Yeaaaah, Eula. We're not boyfriend & girlfriend. So how's that?
It could just be that he is really busy. If he didn't do well on his exams, he may be obsessing about that. If he did well, then it could be he's obsessing about those things the he felt he could have done better at. They are perfectionists. Just cool your heels a bit. If you are really "in" with him and he does care about you, he'll be in touch again. Right now, he's just lost in his head somewhere, and if he cares, you are there in his thoughts, so the "time" he isn't chatting with you, really has no meaning to him, because you are there in his thoughts anyway. He'll come back like no time at all passed. My virgo friend is the same way. He'll disappear sometimes, but he always comes back.
Posted by takahashi09
This guy is a secretive kind of guy. He doesn't share most of his feelings. He's a typical virgo, can turn hot and cold, close and distant. I'm kind of used to it already.
If you are already used to it, then what's the problem?
The push and pull is not just a cancer and virgo thing, sorry. They do that with everyone and in the beginning it can be interpreted as them playing games. Eventually you come to understand how really sensitive they are. Everyone has some sort of sensitivity, it's just how virgo's deal with it that makes things really hard for the other and you wish that they would just communicate with you. You don't want to nor mean to negate their feelings, however they usually don't or it takes a while...
Posted by EulaPosted by takahashi09
This guy is a secretive kind of guy. He doesn't share most of his feelings. He's a typical virgo, can turn hot and cold, close and distant. I'm kind of used to it already.
If you are already used to it, then what's the problem?click to expand
Then I guess I have to wait on him.
And you're right, it's kinda tiring. And painful.
And unfair. What do I do? It's their thing. They're wired like that.
Damn I just want us to be okay already.
Posted by caster721Posted by takahashi09Posted by VirgoFlirt
Here is the real problem that people don't get:
You do anything to help someone then, you get zero help back.
He confided in you about his latent feelings. This is where he give you the time, day and place to marry him of your choosing, right there. You were his to be wife?, most likely in his eyes. You refused to help him, at the wrong time. I did say wrong time there.
That is why there is zero communication from him. It's not looking to good for you at all.
I think that time that he initiated the conversation, it was just some light talk, and light approach that he did there. He was positive and all, and I think there was no helping issue that time, just some, normal talk, chitchat he was trying to have with me.
And yes Eula, that was an important stuff, I was actually doing some computer program together with my friends back then so I think its "reasonable enough" to not talk at the moment.
And again, he said with a "smile" to me, to me that oh you're doing something right now why are you still talking to me, go on and continue that already.
I took it positively. Right?
Then ... that was it he slowly replied to my texts until(seemed a bit aloof)... no response, after a week, still none.
I want to catch up,hopefully, but it's like he's not letting me. Maybe I did really hurt his feelings...unintentionally.
I have a virguy friend and i can relate to that answer. He always likes to give cocky and funny answers until we(me and my taurus friend) came to notice that was his defense mechanism mixed with pride(ego) so that no one can know when he's hurt. If u think he's hurt and felt rejected that probably right coz we cancers also can sense when things are not right with our intuitions, and you are feeling it already.click to expand
Yay you're right. He's THAT sensitive. I hope everything will be fine with us, soon.
I'm not one to sit around and wait for someone who does not communicate to me that they need space. They can be so sensitive to the point they misinterpret what you mean. So, that is why I say addressing the matter could help him understand where you were coming from. Regardless, if it is a relationship or friendship, it's a two way street.
With all this pacifying regarding the virgo guy...what happens when he runs across a virgo gal with the same characteristic?
He sounds selfish and immature. If his feelings are that sensitive that he has to "punish" you with no response, do yourself a favor and move on until he reaches out. Let HIM know you don't appreciate the baby games.
Posted by unlimitedinfinitiPosted by Eula
I'm not one to sit around and wait for someone who does not communicate to me that they need space. They can be so sensitive to the point they misinterpret what you mean. So, that is why I say addressing the matter could help him understand where you were coming from. Regardless, if it is a relationship or friendship, it's a two way street.
I couldn't agree more.click to expand
Eula, yes I will address it. I will man up.
Posted by gemeliorist
The push and pull is not just a cancer and virgo thing, sorry. They do that with everyone and in the beginning it can be interpreted as them playing games. Eventually you come to understand how really sensitive they are. Everyone has some sort of sensitivity, it's just how virgo's deal with it that makes things really hard for the other and you wish that they would just communicate with you. You don't want to nor mean to negate their feelings, however they usually don't or it takes a while...
And when they comes back it's like nothing has ever happened. That we're okay again and I know just there I have to gain (again) his trust, or let's say his heart to feel comfortable of opening up to me again.
Like a 4 yr old. Hehe but I'm saying it not in a bad way, it's kind of part of their nature, but they're genuine, loyal, and always there despite his over sensitivity.After all, he is the best I've ever had.
Posted by caraboo
It could just be that he is really busy. If he didn't do well on his exams, he may be obsessing about that. If he did well, then it could be he's obsessing about those things the he felt he could have done better at. They are perfectionists. Just cool your heels a bit. If you are really "in" with him and he does care about you, he'll be in touch again. Right now, he's just lost in his head somewhere, and if he cares, you are there in his thoughts, so the "time" he isn't chatting with you, really has no meaning to him, because you are there in his thoughts anyway. He'll come back like no time at all passed. My virgo friend is the same way. He'll disappear sometimes, but he always comes back.
Yeah i think so, too. It's like he's just always out there watching me. He doesn't tell me of course, but I can sense it when we talk.
Ixion, I did say on my post that we're far away and yeah our major communication medium is the cellphone, and internet. I hope you understand.
SexyVirgoSiren, don't worry I'm not letting him see that I miss him this much, as I've said in my post, I am living my life. I don't want to appear needy because of him MIA. I texted him once and I didn't get a response, I respected that... And yeah the next time that we speak again, I'll address the issue in a kind way.
Thanks for all of your answer guys I appreciate it you helping me here.
What I worry now is how will he respond after I address the issue, will he be defensive, I'll tell him anyway, and I'll try to talk to him kindly.
I hope it'll get better soon for the both of us.
SexyVirgoSiren, don't worry I'm not letting him see that I miss him this much, as I've said in my post, I am living my life. I don't want to appear needy because of him MIA. I texted him once and I didn't get a response, I respected that... And yeah the next time that we speak again, I'll address the issue in a kind way.
Thanks for all of your answer guys I appreciate it you helping me here.
What I worry now is how will he respond after I address the issue, will he be defensive, I'll tell him anyway, and I'll try to talk to him kindly.
I hope it'll get better soon for the both of us.
Well, I've been the sensitive Virgo guy before. Overreacted in a similar manner. I'd definitely say you didn't do anything wrong, he should simply be more mature. He might just come around and if not, not a huge loss to you.
thanks SV! btw he's 9/12 just sayin'
Posted by takahashi09
thanks SV! btw he's 9/12 just sayin'
Yeah, I recognized myself in him.
It really gets too complicated as we live too much in our heads. I'm sure he has some logic to what he is doing but if he would say it out loud it'd sound ridiculous.
Just send him a short text. "I miss you."
It will give him reassurance, let him know you do actually miss him and it's straight forward and doesn't appear needy on your part. You're just stating a fact.
If he doesn't respond to that, then I wouldn't make any more effort or waste anymore time worrying about it. He needs to man up.
It will give him reassurance, let him know you do actually miss him and it's straight forward and doesn't appear needy on your part. You're just stating a fact.
If he doesn't respond to that, then I wouldn't make any more effort or waste anymore time worrying about it. He needs to man up.
I was having second thoughts if I was gonna text him...
It's been weeks
Sure. I'll text him. Thanks.
It's been weeks
Sure. I'll text him. Thanks.
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