what the hell is he doing??

My virgo bf (ex bf) is driving me nuts.

He broke up with me in March becoz of job issues and he could not handle all the pressure.
2 weeks later he came back to me and appologize, saying he has made a big mistake.
I still love him so we got back together after that.

He was very sweet, caring and text me a lot, call me everyday during lunch, and we meet almost 3-4 times a week.
on the 14th july i went to bali for my holiday, and when i came back on 20th July, he broke up with me saying, we don't mean to be together, and he wanted to tell me 2 weeks ago. he said he met a girl and really really like her...and if our relationship is so strong and good, why would he have feelings for someone else.

I said to him,' so you have been wearing a mask in front of me for the last two weeks? and all your sweet talks and time you spent with me were all fake? he told me OF COURSE IT WAS NOT...

My point is there was no sign at all!!! he even said he will miss me so much when i was not around. but BANG..right after my trip he broke up with me on the phone.

We did not talk to each other since 20th July. and i just called him, asking him if i can get my stuff back this sunday. he said i can come anytime as he has nothing to do during the weekend.

what's wrong with him??

He's insecure.

He's feeling sorry for himself, for whatever reason, and is using your seemingly harmless actions as a scapegoat to why he's just not at a level to commit.

Whether there IS another woman or not, I doubt his feelings for her exist. He's probably testing you to see what your reaction will be, to gauge whether or not you'll care.

Sounds to me like you met a really immature Virgo, sorry about that. I'd ignore him and his calls, if I were you--but I can tell you really love him, and it's not going to be that easy.

Posted by CLCNY30
He's insecure.

He's feeling sorry for himself, for whatever reason, and is using your seemingly harmless actions as a scapegoat to why he's just not at a level to commit.

Whether there IS another woman or not, I doubt his feelings for her exist. He's probably testing you to see what your reaction will be, to gauge whether or not you'll care.

Sounds to me like you met a really immature Virgo, sorry about that. I'd ignore him and his calls, if I were you--but I can tell you really love him, and it's not going to be that easy.

Thank you so much for your reply!
I have been dying for help these few days. As all my friends told me he is a jerk and just let him be.
But deep in my heart i could not agree with my friends. He might be immature, Irresponsible but i dun think he is such a cold blood jerk.
but the things he did to me... really hurt a lot. I did not beg or even cry when he broke up with me. Next day i removed my relationship status and all the pics of us from FB.
He did the same things to me in the next few hours but he kept some of my pics in his photo albums.

He came back from Germany to Singapore on 27th July and we bumped into each other in the club. and he was so shocked to see me. I pretended there is nothing going on between us and just said hi to him and his guy friend. Then he said,' i want to talk to you in person (about the break up, becoz he broke up with me on the phone), but not tonite.' I said, ' it is okay, your guys have fun.' then i left.

But till today he has not contacted me. That's why i decide to give him up and take back my stuff from him on this sunday.

He didn't treat you very well by dumping you the way he did, I dunno if he is a jerk but he definitely is displaying douche bag behavior towards you. He seems really indecisive about what he wants. You handled things really well which is one of the reasons why he keeps coming back, your mature, your not groveling and dragging your body across his feet begging him to stay and men are very attracted to women that have control over her emotions...He'll be back again but if I were you I would pass on trying again, he has some growing up to do.

Posted by tiki33
He didn't treat you very well by dumping you the way he did, I dunno if he is a jerk but he definitely is displaying douche bag behavior towards you. He seems really indecisive about what he wants. You handled things really well which is one of the reasons why he keeps coming back, your mature, your not groveling and dragging your body across his feet begging him to stay and men are very attracted to women that have control over her emotions...He'll be back again but if I were you I would pass on trying again, he has some growing up to do.

Thank you TiKi33 for your reply.
Love is a choice, isnt?

He does not consider my feelings and worst of all, he did not even give us a chance to sort things out.
He thinks good relationship just happens effortlessly.
Think i am gonna cry when i see him on sunday, but NOT in front of him.

After recalling your original story about him being from Germany you from Singapore (or somewhere in the Orient), I was pretty certain he would not see you as a practical option. But that's just me.

Posted by sagiviviane

Posted by tiki33
He didn't treat you very well by dumping you the way he did, I dunno if he is a jerk but he definitely is displaying douche bag behavior towards you. He seems really indecisive about what he wants. You handled things really well which is one of the reasons why he keeps coming back, your mature, your not groveling and dragging your body across his feet begging him to stay and men are very attracted to women that have control over her emotions...He'll be back again but if I were you I would pass on trying again, he has some growing up to do.

Thank you TiKi33 for your reply.
Love is a choice, isnt?

He does not consider my feelings and worst of all, he did not even give us a chance to sort things out.
He thinks good relationship just happens effortlessly.
Think i am gonna cry when i see him on sunday, but NOT in front of him.

click to expand

@Effortlessly...Unfortunately for many women they get stuck with very immature men that feel they are falling out of love because he's no longer in the honeymoon phase and the relationship gets real, the energy changes in the relationship and some men feel they are no longer in love, if he was in love and things were working why would he be attracted to this girl or that girl, once he see that he's actually attracted to other women, can actually fall in lust or love with other women they begin to doubt the relationship and most likely end the relationship. Some men feel like if I have to work at it then it's not working, if things have to be fixed and sorted out then it's not working, I dunno why some men feel this way but some just do and once he figures that things need to be discussed, sorted out, fixed he's out of there.

This guy is immature, I think if you try again you will see him backing out of the relationship shortly thereafter, only you know what you will and will not tolerate from this guy, hopefully your sick of being dumped and will allow a better man to come into your life that won't treat you the way he has chosen to treat you.

Tiki, that was PERFECTLY stated. And you did it without being rude 🙂

I love the Virgo section

LOL YAY I got it right this time, no rudeness....this encourages me...Thanks CLCNY30

No that is not sarcasm, I been getting on peoples nerves here lately with my responses so this makes me feel like I'm on track lol.

Thanks Ameth, you never fail to make me giggle at times and contemplate when I read your comments on the message boards, I think we have similar writing style s as well. Your actually bolder than me, I think it but won't say it, you say it without hesitation lol (like that about you)

Thanks@catguy...that's great b/c I don't think I will be on DXP much longer...contemplating leaving soon

I been here for about 3 or almost 4 years now...long time, haven't been able to hit the delete button b/c most of the women I help contact me through DXP that's the only thing that's stopped me thus far, don't wanna abandon those women.

Posted by tiki33
LOL YAY I got it right this time, no rudeness....this encourages me...Thanks CLCNY30

No that is not sarcasm, I been getting on peoples nerves here lately with my responses so this makes me feel like I'm on track lol.

I understand, 🙂 and don't leave--just find those that get where you're coming from and befriend them 🙂

CLC I will take it into consideration....Thanks (:

torn.... exactly...i'm sure i will get clarity soon

I have to disagree with some of the things said here, like .... he's a douchebag, he's immature, he's insecure, etc.


People are allowed to make the choices in their life of who they want to be with in a partnership. And just because a person chooses not to be with you (third person), doesn't make them any of those things mentioned.

I would wager that the reason why he didn't say anything beforehand was because you were getting ready to go on holiday and he was trying to be considerate to not ruin your vacation.


From what you said ... he wasn't hateful, he didn't start a fight, he didn't critisize, he didn't do anything to merit the names called him .... he simply told you that he is not choosing you to be his.


Let me ask people ... if you decide to break it off with your current bf/gf does that make you immature? Insecure? Of course not .. it makes a person exercising their rights to decide who they want to partner with.



:::: shakes head ::::

As always, you see only what you want to see, P-Angel. He's an as.shole for playing mindgames with her; he didn't break it off and leave it there, he played games all over the place. That is a total sign of immaturity, and she is definitely the victim in this situation, from what she has stated in her story. A victim by choice, yes, but a victim nonetheless.

There is no victim when your boyfriend decides he isn't all that into you .... just because he doesn't want to be with you, this doesn't make you a victim.


wtf is the matter with people?


Seriously, don't show anymore of your stupidity .. nothing in here was even suggested that he was playing games with her.

He broke up with her .. nothing more than that. And furthermore, he's decent when he sees her and/or talks to her. When she asked to come get her stuff, or when he sees her in the bar .. he's perfectly nice to her.


CLCNY .... we already know you think you are a perpetual victim, this we learned on the Pisces board .. so, I'm not suprised you would think this way.



:::: shakes head ::::


This man exercises his right as a human being to make his own decision about his life ... and the Princesses come forward with their ass and show why Let-It-Be's thread about women fucking men's heads up to be correct.

And, P-Angel, we already know that you think you know more about people than they know about themselves--so I'm not surprised you're trying to tell me about what you THINK you know. I own up to my sh.it, always have and always will, so you can kick rocks with flip flops, because--as usually, you're completely off your rocker. Judging me off of one story where the villian happened to be a stupid as.s fish, like yourself, is absolutely absurd, cocky, and downright idiotic, but you're a self-proclaimed know-it-all, and just can't seem to help it. I'll pray for you.

He's an immature as.shole. Case closed. You can't have 2 pages of people agreeing on it, and then you come in and say it's just not possible. He's playing games with her. End of story.

Please, do share--why do you come to a board full of a sign that you can't seem to stand? Doesn't that just make you psychotic? Don't you have better things to do with your time?

:::shakes head right the fu.ck back:::

Let's just break this the f.uck down, shall we??



"My virgo bf (ex bf) is driving me nuts.

He broke up with me in March becoz of job issues and he could not handle all the pressure.
2 weeks later he came back to me and appologize, saying he has made a big mistake.
I still love him so we got back together after that."


the mere FACT that he GOT TOGETHER with her, then said "OMG, THE PRESSURE! THE PRESSURE! AHHHHH" denotes an indecisive prick, who cares not for hurting HER feelings. He couldn't handle the pressure? So what did he think was going to happen? That she would not hold him accountable for being the other half in the relationship? That she'd never ask for a call, or to spend time with him? For him to THEN come back so soon after that bullsh.it showed how f.ucked in the head he was--had he come back after a longer period of time, it could have just signified his need to get his sh.it together and then try again, and had he not come back at all, it would have showed that he was for real about feeling pressured, and didn't want to play games with either of their hearts. He came back, 2 WEEKS LATER, however. At this point, yes, the OP should have held him at arm's length, but she decided to give it another chance, because HE was asking for another chance.

"He was very sweet, caring and text me a lot, call me everyday during lunch, and we meet almost 3-4 times a week.
on the 14th july i went to bali for my holiday, and when i came back on 20th July, he broke up with me saying, we don't mean to be together, and he wanted to tell me 2 weeks ago. he said he met a girl and really really like her...and if our relationship is so strong and good, why would he have feelings for someone else."


So, he comes back and puts his boyfriendness in full effect--staying in touch, being as close to her as possible, acting as if everything is okay--and the second she goes on a little vacation he becomes so paranoid about "the end" that he breaks it off with her yet AGAIN, and even throws in that he met a girl. So...you don't see how FU.CKED UP it is that not only did he act like it was her fault for the break up, how dare she go on vacation, but he also went and found a substitute in the meanwhile, P-Angel? No the fu.ck wonder--that's a Pisces move, YOU fish play the victim afer hurting someone ELSE, so no wonder your heart is bleeding for this piece o' sh.it pathetic excuse for a "boyfriend". Makes perfect sense.

"I said to him,' so you have been wearing a mask in front of me for the last two weeks? and all your sweet talks and time you spent with me were all fake? he told me OF COURSE IT WAS NOT...

My point is there was no sign at all!!! he even said he will miss me so much when i was not around. but BANG..right after my trip he broke up with me on the phone."


Disgusting. I even have a wild feeling there IS no other woman, he just want to go all Pisces on her and play mindgames to see if she really loves him. Ugh.

This is game playing at its finest, and anyone disagreeing is a game player themselves, as far as I'm concerned. Maybe this makes you feel guilty for being an ass? Maybe this makes you understand how badly you've hurt others with your lies and shenanigans? Either, it's game-playing, and whether the OP put herself in a position to be played or not does NOT excuse that as.sholes actions.

"We did not talk to each other since 20th July. and i just called him, asking him if i can get my stuff back this sunday. he said i can come anytime as he has nothing to do during the weekend.

what's wrong with him??"


He's an immature, unevolved, craptastically retarded as.shole, that's what's wrong. Any woman who meets him is doomed to the same fate, I'm sure. OP, if I were you, I'd go get my sh.it, and be OUT. Don't fall for the "hey, can we talk?", "I really miss you...", "please don't hate me", cuz it's coming. Virgo men can act very similarly to Pisces men, with the mindgames, and the game playing--it's why I've never been attracted to one. Just grab.your.stuff and JET. He doesn't deserve you, he needs to try these mindgames out on a damn Gemini, Libra, or Leo, so they can castrate him and teach him a damn lesson.

Posted by P-Angel


He broke up with her .. nothing more than that. And furthermore, he's decent when he sees her and/or talks to her. When she asked to come get her stuff, or when he sees her in the bar .. he's perfectly nice to her.

You don't get it...

but since you're a pisces, you can be a brutal bitch during the relationship, but if he broke up with you, and he is "nice" than you are cool with it...

Still even if you try to explain, you won't get it...

Posted by sorti-fantastic poney

Posted by P-Angel


He broke up with her .. nothing more than that. And furthermore, he's decent when he sees her and/or talks to her. When she asked to come get her stuff, or when he sees her in the bar .. he's perfectly nice to her.

You don't get it...

but since you're a pisces, you can be a brutal bitch during the relationship, but if he broke up with you, and he is "nice" than you are cool with it...

Still even if you try to explain, you won't get it...

click to expand

For a Virguy to be telling you that— You've gotta be absolutely clueless.

You not seeing how much he used her is the reason PISCES get used. YOU guys are the self-made victims, you've got no room to talk about other signs playing the victim when you invented it.

Hey, shit happens right!?!?!??!

I don\'t believe 100% or any percent of anything anyone is ever saying, everything is always manipulated to be in favor of themselves...Everyone plays the victim at some point or another...Just determines who is more right than wrong.