When someone is being nice to you

This topic was created in the Virgo forum by colors on Wednesday, December 16, 2020 and has 22 replies.
Virgos does that make you anxious? We are usually the care takers and want to be nice and remember details about others, so how does it feel when someone is being nice to you and appreciative of you? How do you deal with that? Is there a chance that they are also a virgo Big Grin Do you wait for them to not be nice, because that is how usually things are?
They are nice in a genuine way, I don't doubt that. What makes me anxious is for how long? And what if I get used to this niceness and then they start ignoring? How do you stay detached.
Posted by MadTwins80

Lol I have seen this . On the surface you act effusive and make a fuss about how nice it is to be praised and appreciated but underneath it seems like you don't really believe it 🤔😅


I believe it, but am scared of getting attached to this behavior, because the person cannot always have you on their mind right?
Posted by MadTwins80

Lol I have seen this . On the surface you act effusive and make a fuss about how nice it is to be praised and appreciated but underneath it seems like you don't really believe it 🤔😅


I guess how to go with the flow, appreciate their niceness but not get too used to it?
I guess it is easy when your emotions are not involved, you can appreciate and move on.
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80

Lol I have seen this . On the surface you act effusive and make a fuss about how nice it is to be praised and appreciated but underneath it seems like you don't really believe it 🤔😅


I believe it, but am scared of getting attached to this behavior, because the person cannot always have you on their mind right?


Well the virgo I know will react in a way that sounds grateful but underneath you get the impression she doesn't much like being praised or complimented . Well , she does like it but she doesn't trust it as you say. Also she is very aware of her "imperfections" so it's like she doesn't really believe the praise in that way

It's a strange one. Can't you accept the nice words or deeds without attaching anything more significant to it?
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No, in this case, I am not doubting the nice words or deeds, I am just worried of getting attached to the person due to his niceness. And maybe I am noticing the niceness more because I find that person to also be nice and kind. So I am like please don't be so nice or it will be hard for me when you stop being nice or I will start expecting you to stay this way always, which is not practical thinking. Big Grin
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80

Lol I have seen this . On the surface you act effusive and make a fuss about how nice it is to be praised and appreciated but underneath it seems like you don't really believe it 🤔😅


I believe it, but am scared of getting attached to this behavior, because the person cannot always have you on their mind right?


Well the virgo I know will react in a way that sounds grateful but underneath you get the impression she doesn't much like being praised or complimented . Well , she does like it but she doesn't trust it as you say. Also she is very aware of her "imperfections" so it's like she doesn't really believe the praise in that way

It's a strange one. Can't you accept the nice words or deeds without attaching anything more significant to it?


No, in this case, I am not doubting the nice words or deeds, I am just worried of getting attached to the person due to his niceness. And maybe I am noticing the niceness more because I find that person to also be nice and kind. So I am like please don't be so nice or it will be hard for me when you stop being nice or I will start expecting you to stay this way always, which is not practical thinking. Big Grin


but you're nice

maybe he won't stop being nice lol
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haha not saying I am nice, or this is even not about him continuing to be nice, but more about how do I not get attached to him. I think I need to stop thinking so much and let him be anyway he wants to be and not take things too seriously.
It makes me squint with suspicion yes

I love praise but I’m quite modest and feel uncomfy getting too much. In terms of someone being nice, idk I’m learning to be grateful and accept compliments better
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80

Lol I have seen this . On the surface you act effusive and make a fuss about how nice it is to be praised and appreciated but underneath it seems like you don't really believe it 🤔😅


I believe it, but am scared of getting attached to this behavior, because the person cannot always have you on their mind right?


Well the virgo I know will react in a way that sounds grateful but underneath you get the impression she doesn't much like being praised or complimented . Well , she does like it but she doesn't trust it as you say. Also she is very aware of her "imperfections" so it's like she doesn't really believe the praise in that way

It's a strange one. Can't you accept the nice words or deeds without attaching anything more significant to it?


No, in this case, I am not doubting the nice words or deeds, I am just worried of getting attached to the person due to his niceness. And maybe I am noticing the niceness more because I find that person to also be nice and kind. So I am like please don't be so nice or it will be hard for me when you stop being nice or I will start expecting you to stay this way always, which is not practical thinking. Big Grin


but you're nice

maybe he won't stop being nice lol


haha not saying I am nice, or this is even not about him continuing to be nice, but more about how do I not get attached to him. I think I need to stop thinking so much and let him be anyway he wants to be and not take things too seriously.


I did read that Virgos appreciate it if you let them set the pace when getting to know them. So maybe you're finding it too much too soon in that regard? You like him being nice but you'd prefer him to be a bit more neutral until you know him better and feel more comfortable with having some attachment to him?
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Or rather not developing attachment to him as I know he is not available. I think I feel a connection to him so it is not helping that he is being nice. I know I also don't want him to not be nice. Big Grin Like you said maybe things just need to remain neutral (at least emotionally) and cordial.
Posted by Sunsetvirgo

It makes me squint with suspicion yes

I love praise but I’m quite modest and feel uncomfy getting too much. In terms of someone being nice, idk I’m learning to be grateful and accept compliments better


Yes, exactly I feel gratitude for his comments and observations, but same time I am not used to it. It's like he notices and is thoughtful. I am like wait what?
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80

Lol I have seen this . On the surface you act effusive and make a fuss about how nice it is to be praised and appreciated but underneath it seems like you don't really believe it 🤔😅


I believe it, but am scared of getting attached to this behavior, because the person cannot always have you on their mind right?


Well the virgo I know will react in a way that sounds grateful but underneath you get the impression she doesn't much like being praised or complimented . Well , she does like it but she doesn't trust it as you say. Also she is very aware of her "imperfections" so it's like she doesn't really believe the praise in that way

It's a strange one. Can't you accept the nice words or deeds without attaching anything more significant to it?


No, in this case, I am not doubting the nice words or deeds, I am just worried of getting attached to the person due to his niceness. And maybe I am noticing the niceness more because I find that person to also be nice and kind. So I am like please don't be so nice or it will be hard for me when you stop being nice or I will start expecting you to stay this way always, which is not practical thinking. Big Grin


but you're nice

maybe he won't stop being nice lol


haha not saying I am nice, or this is even not about him continuing to be nice, but more about how do I not get attached to him. I think I need to stop thinking so much and let him be anyway he wants to be and not take things too seriously.


I did read that Virgos appreciate it if you let them set the pace when getting to know them. So maybe you're finding it too much too soon in that regard? You like him being nice but you'd prefer him to be a bit more neutral until you know him better and feel more comfortable with having some attachment to him?


Or rather not developing attachment to him as I know he is not available. I think I feel a connection to him so it is not helping that he is being nice. I know I also don't want him to not be nice. Big Grin Like you said maybe things just need to remain neutral (at least emotionally) and cordial.


Don't get attached! Let him carry on being nice to you and enjoy it for what it is 😉If he says to you one day that he has split up with whoever because he wants to be with you then cool but don't bring yourself heartache for no reason
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I know Sad
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShow
Posted by MadTwins80

Lol I have seen this . On the surface you act effusive and make a fuss about how nice it is to be praised and appreciated but underneath it seems like you don't really believe it 🤔😅


Exactly, because nice people are usually up to something or want something. Especially if they were never that nice to begin with. @Jumpin_Jupiter that's why I always say Myfartsshine is one of the fakest people here.

She condescended me for the longest time every chance she got because she was Team Ands. Then out of the blue she started being super nice to me - but of course we all know Scorps are full of shit, so I didn't believe a word of it because I knew it wouldn't last long. Much sooner than later I caught her talking discreet trash about me with Cloudy, while not having the balls to say it to my proverbial face.

Needless to say I told her exactly what I thought of her, and she ran for the mute button like the sniveling cowards Scorps are when confronted.

User Submitted Image
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Yo man we got what you call fake nice people here. I try not to buddy buddy up with nobody here. I just never know when they'll turn on me. I come here to post and go. I only respond when someone quote me or if I see a topic of my interest. I find most of the Scorpios with fire moons runs straight for the mute button when shit hit the fan. I'm long over that. I don't care much about muting anybody simply because this place and these users doesn't hold that much value to me like at all. The minute these folks find out some bad flaws about you or even if you talk mad shit about their sun and moon sign they'll run straight for their dear and true friend....the mute button. I ain't got time for them and their balony.

And speaking of Rebecca lynch, the wwe female gif you got up there, I just so happen to be watching this clip


A strange coincident I would say.
Posted by alexscaries

I don't know how authoritative I am as virgo rising. There is the bigger picture though if someone says you are good at something, there's good then there's better and nobody should strive for just good. With regards people doing stuff for you I find it emasculating; just because I am automatous. Not suspicious of their motives.


This is not him saying I am good at something or doing stuff for me, just that he shows appreciation for things I do as part of my job. I know people appreciate each other, but I am not used to people showing appreciation that much, hence the question how to deal with niceness.
Posted by fyrephish

Anyway, it was so awkward BUT I am also SO sentivite and AWARE of the kindness of others because it's not often that's it's shown to/given to me (always expected of me though). So, I am very aware when someone is being genuinely and sincerely kind and I never forget it.

It could be someone from 3rd grade, I'll remember.


^^this. You said it better what I was trying to say.
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by fyrephish
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80

Lol, I have seen this. On the surface, you act effusive and make a fuss about how nice it is to be praised and appreciated but underneath it seems like you don't believe it 🤔😅


I believe it, but am scared of getting attached to this behavior, because the person cannot always have you on their mind right?


Well, the Virgo I know will react in a way that sounds grateful but underneath you get the impression she doesn't much like being praised or complimented. Well, she does like it but she doesn't trust it as you say. Also, she is very aware of her "imperfections" so it's like she doesn't believe the praise in that way

It's a strange one. Can't you accept the nice words or deeds without attaching anything more significant to them?


No, in this case, I am not doubting the nice words or deeds, I am just worried about getting attached to the person due to his niceness. And maybe I am noticing the niceness more because I find that person to also be nice and kind. So I am like please don't be so nice or it will be hard for me when you stop being nice or I will start expecting you to stay this way always, which is not practical thinking. Big Grin


but you're nice

maybe he won't stop being nice lol


haha not saying I am nice, or this is even not about him continuing to be nice, but more about how do I not get attached to him. I think I need to stop thinking so much and let him be any way he wants to be and not take things too seriously.


I did read that Virgos appreciate it if you let them set the pace when getting to know them. So maybe you're finding it too much too soon in that regard? You like him being nice but you'd prefer him to be a bit more neutral until you know him better and feel more comfortable with having some attachment to him?


In my case, this is true. I like to take affairs of the heart especially or anything emotional (very sloooooooow).

Not jump on too quickly, think things through (many times), pros v cons, list the qualities/values adds to my life to see if we're complementary, run what-if scenarios, evaluate what impacts a union will have on my freedom, you know, typical Virgo over analysis stuff and then after all of that, I all give him my phone # 😂 this is why I'm single!


Sounds very carefree, spontaneous and romantic !
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Big Grin
we've got this virgo 'etiquette manager' at work lol whatever that is

at first, i thought she's gonna be super critical (and i was right!)

but she keeps giving us 30-min breaks every other hour

so now i think i love her 😍😍

anything that makes my life easier and more peaceful is 'being nice' to me tbh
Me but with everyone no matter the circumstances

User Submitted Image


Getting real sick of this phone picking words for me 😑.
@MadTwins80 so this guy talked consistently for days, non personal, work related and then once he was able to ask personal questions he stopped abruptly. We still talk here and there for work but it's like his curiosity was satisfied so he did not feel a need to talk daily anymore. As I had mentioned he is not available so I don't have hopes, but is that what happened, he didn't know much about me and seemed interested in talking, and then when he got his answers, he doesn't feel the need to talk as often? I just feel exhausted.
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors

@MadTwins80 so this guy talked consistently for days, non personal, work related and then once he was able to ask personal questions he stopped abruptly. We still talk here and there for work but it's like his curiosity was satisfied so he did not feel a need to talk daily anymore. As I had mentioned he is not available so I don't have hopes, but is that what happened, he didn't know much about me and seemed interested in talking, and then when he got his answers, he doesn't feel the need to talk as often? I just feel exhausted.


To me it just sounds like he was maybe interested but then decided he wasn't. I can't see any other explanation? Unless it was always work and never personal? but you seem to think there was def a personal element to it at the beginning at least

@fyrephish help me out here. She's a genius, she will tell you the answer 😆
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I mean nothing was going to happen in any case due to his situation, but I think there was and still is a connection, but before he did not know much about my personal life. I feel like it was more wanting to find out causing the frequent conversations. Then one day when we got on a call for work related stuff, he asked many personal questions and it felt like he solved the quiz, now he can relax. Big Grin Or like you said maybe he is not interested. I still feel the connection on both sides, only talking frequency has reduced. I guess I should relax and not stress myself knowing the situation. This just made me think that should you always hold off sharing personal information and keep people guessing for them to stay interested?
Posted by dOpehEad

No. I'm lonely.


what??
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors
Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by colors

@MadTwins80 so this guy talked consistently for days, non personal, work related and then once he was able to ask personal questions he stopped abruptly. We still talk here and there for work but it's like his curiosity was satisfied so he did not feel a need to talk daily anymore. As I had mentioned he is not available so I don't have hopes, but is that what happened, he didn't know much about me and seemed interested in talking, and then when he got his answers, he doesn't feel the need to talk as often? I just feel exhausted.


To me it just sounds like he was maybe interested but then decided he wasn't. I can't see any other explanation? Unless it was always work and never personal? but you seem to think there was def a personal element to it at the beginning at least

@fyrephish help me out here. She's a genius, she will tell you the answer 😆


I mean nothing was going to happen in any case due to his situation, but I think there was and still is a connection, but before he did not know much about my personal life. I feel like it was more wanting to find out causing the frequent conversations. Then one day when we got on a call for work related stuff, he asked many personal questions and it felt like he solved the quiz, now he can relax. Big Grin Or like you said maybe he is not interested. I still feel the connection on both sides, only talking frequency has reduced. I guess I should relax and not stress myself knowing the situation. This just made me think that should you always hold off sharing personal information and keep people guessing for them to stay interested?


Maybe but also you don't know what is happening in his life. Maybe at the start he was going through a rough patch with his partner and he was lowkey looking for someone and now things are better between them?

Or perhaps you didn't give him the signals that he was looking for and he thought you weren't interested? If you are interested lol (sounds like you are) but at the same time you know he is unavailable so prob for your own sake you should try not to invest much in the situation

Or maybe , like you say, he just wanted to find out about you. What sign is he, did you find out?

Yes, I think a bit of mystery is a good thing. Also if you talk too much things can get a bit stale - you need the right boundaries to keep things fresh
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I don't know his sign, but wondering if virgo based on some traits. smile I don't know about giving signs but I think sometimes two people just feel a connection. I guess I need to take it easy.
flustered yet appreciative and proceed to overthink