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This topic was created in the Virgo forum by missmorals on Tuesday, September 5, 2006 and has 70 replies.
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Hi People..Seeing as Dy is a popular agony uncle on here, this is a thread specifically designed for you to ask Dy your questions....
Ready, steady....GO!!!!!!!!!!
Alright, I'll start . . .
If you were dating someone that you really liked, then for a reason you couldn't put your finger on . . she pulled away and wouldn't contact you for several days, nor, take your calls . . how would you feel? Would you then wonder, and maybe even worry, that something had happened that you weren't aware of?
Well Dy, as you know my story I was wondering just out of curiousity two things. I haven't had contact with the Virgo guy in my case since the ending of July. I've attempted to take contact with him but he just ignores me and my text messages. As far as I know of I've done nothing wrong so this is why I don't understand why he's ignoring me. I've basically given up the whole thing. However, just wondering though, do Virgos go months before they take contact again? Or is it once Virgos disappear they never return? He knows I'm not mad anymore (although I really am but he doesn't know it since he's ignoring me) so I don't quite get the silent treatment.
The other thing I was wondering about is his birthday is on Friday. Would it be a good idea to attempt to call him again to wish him a happy birthday, or just send a text, or just ignore the whole thing? Could he be waiting for me call him as I haven't done that as I've sent text messages? Or is the way he's acting his way of keeping me at arms' length? I'm really tired of the silent treatment.
I'm only asking just to rest my curiousity and maybe prepare myself for an unexpected surprise.
Thanks in advance.
Thanks, Dyr . . however that's action. How would you feel?
I'm a Virgo, I don't have any feelings... IF I had feelings, my first would be CONCERN (not panic) that she couldn't communicate.
Tsk, tsk... Come now Dy, do we need to dredge up your first few posts from when you started seeing your Scorpgal 5 months ago. Not panic indeed...
Okay, Dy. Thanks. At times, I've thought I was completely insane because I've never experienced in my life a guy to act so immature and odd in my entire life. It just doesn't make sense to me at all. Unfortunately, my rational thinking has taken a bit of a bruising because I've done everything I know of to make things work and failed. I don't like failing either. However, it's even more frustrating when you don't even know what happened. It came out of left field the silent treatment. I guess, he was warning me in his Virgo way by saying there are a lot of things sick about him, that he isn't good for me. How odd that is that he wanted me to know that. I also guess that was his way of letting me go and not wonder about him. I'm baffled but will move on. However, it's weird the whole thing. He really is losing a great catch. What doesn't make sense to me is he doesn't even see it. He must not be thinking clearly at all. Anyway, I've bounced back. Already have my eye on a Med.student. Hope I see him again. Even though this Virgo has given me a lot of grief, I've come through it with my dignity intact and I've even become a better person. I've learnt a whole lot with getting to know him to which my life has been enriched, crazy as that seems. I just hope he realizes one day what he let get away.
Sorry Dy..I didn't think anyone would take it seriously!...
**guilt trip**
LMAO @ Dyxpnet.com..hahahah..
Mystical you still seem pretty hung up about this guy...
MM,
Yeah, I'm getting over it. Taking me time though. His birthday is on Friday so I've been in thinking mode as what to do. I got good advice from Dy (thanks for starting the thread) so I know what to do. My problem is when I let someone in my life, I have a hard time letting them go just like that. I have to go through a lot of different emotions. Right now I'm at the ending regarding this Virgo so I'm at the anger stage with him. When I'm at the anger stage I don't have much left for a person. I admire with Scorpios that they are able to cut someone off just like that. At times, I wish I had that ability but I don't. Anyway, after Friday things will be much better and I'll be done. One thing with me is when I'm done, I'M DONE.
Dy: Uh, I was being sarcastic
Yeah, I kinda figured that was your tongue sticking out of your cheek - especially as it was directed at P-Angel...
P-Angel does have a point though... Sometimes you Virguys get caught up in the technique and forget to just relax and let it flow! But I do think you guys can be taught (or at least reminded Winking )... Oops, wasn't that another thread?
"Yeah, anyone who's read my rantings & ventings on DXP would know the very passionate core generating all that steam!"
Tell you the truth, I see no fire in you at all, just talk about such things. To stay completely calm and composed at all times isn't fire waiting to explode.
What I see in most responses is, "perfectly reasonable and appropriate to the given situation..."
But, don't my word for it . . I'm just one out of the numerous people who come in here and say the same thing, so what do I know?
I was watching a movie with Sean Connery in it and it was a devasting scene, where he thought he lost his wife and was suppose to be broken up by it, his life in shambles.
Then, she appears, she's not dead and he's suppose to embrace his gladness, thankful to his very core that she's alive, oh god . . she's alive. He's an actor, right? And is suppose to portray to the world, watching this movie that she means everything to him, that he might as well die without her, what does he do to act this out?
Sean Connery gives her a cerimonial peck on the forehead . . . I'm sure every woman wants to be loved that way - NOT. Even in acting, he can't pull it off. If he wanted us to believe that this woman was his whole life, he should have swooped her off her feet and bombarded her with mad, mad kisses all over her face and embrace her whole body with his.
Did he do that? No, he didn't even touch her, except the peck on the forehead.
Dy - I know you were messing kiddo..
Mystical - Good luck with it..
Yeah I love being a scorp for that reason alone..Being able to cut someone off as though they never existed..and having absolutely no remorse whatsoever..Sounds bloody awful but its true..
Damn Miss, you're almost all Scorpio, lol
How rare is that?
I always knew I was unique...
SCORPBLOODYTASTIC
Tongue
I think what makes it so beautiful about virgo men and their almost frozen state of expression is if you are insightful and patient enough you can sense the love deep down inside, and when it creeps out once in a while it is 100 times more precious than the abused and over expressed meaningless infatuation that most other people have been craving. Which is usually misinterpreted as love, but in actuality, it is selfishness. Virgo love and passion (yes, I said passion) is real to the core, and those who are completely and wholely honest with him may experience the passion buried dearly inside his heart.
"Well, I'd like to offer some video evidence of our passion, but Deb won't allow cameras in the shag salon!"
What????? Oh, please . . . there's not a Scorpio alive who isn't wickedly kinky. You should be having to fight HER off from making homies.
"almost frozen state of expression is if you are insightful and patient enough you can sense the love deep down inside, and when it creeps out once in a while"
lol, I'm sorry arieswoman, but, I find that quite humorous eventhough I know it wasn't intended that way.
We don't know it's love because they ain't telling us, or showing us because of their frozen state of expression. . but, if we pay close attention and are patient . . we might sense it. Then, cherish the minimal times that we can sense this because it will only creep out once in a while. lol
Pretty much the only boards I visit regularly are Virgo, Aries and Pisces and Virgo is the only one that's fun.
Aries only talk about how wonderful and beautiful they are.
Pisces is full of woe and doom, poor pitiful me.
Virgo on the other hand, once you get their attention, they are fun to tease. I'm fucking with you guys . . you know that, don't you?
It's just that if someone, which I gladly take this position of "someone", doesn't put some spark under everyone's little butts . . it's so boring.
Talking about little butts . . every V-man I know has little buns. Do tell Dr., tiny buns, or tiny peenie?
"Hey, we are beautiful!! Least I am...hehe...And I don't just like to talk about that...I also like to talk about porn too...you forgot the porn P-Angel"
lol, oh yeah, how could I forget that? hehehehe
male gay porn . . that's rocks . . hell yeah
There's just nothing hotter than watching two men go at it.

Dy,
If you were in the middle of indecision about a loving prospect, which behavior(s) from her would most likely make you lean towards the positive(or negative) ?
1. total silence /withdrawn from the situation seemingly 100% gone
2. confrontation /forcing your decision by asking to lay your cards on the table so she can know where the 2 of you are going with it
3. appeasing / just going along with your indecisive ways
A gf just called me and said she just read a line in a novel that is a perfect way for me to approach my virgoman: "Just out of curiosity, how would you define your role in my life?"
That is a valid question for anyone who you are interested in, I think, and I guess would fall under #2 confrontation above. Whatdyathink Dy?
ltvm
It seems ANY time he is asked something personal, he puts his head down like a young boy to answer any such questions. Some eye contact is asking a lot. What's with that little boy stuff? It's just a Virgothing, isn't it????
I'll ask IF I get to see him. What a game this seems to be and I don't like games.


Are you gonna answer the other stuff re: silence, etc.?
Would love to know...

You know...I really don't understand what all this withdrawing and disappearing stuff with a Virgo is about...I've never noticed it..always found them to be quite accessible...maybe it's just that i'm too detached to care? lol
I don't think that's what it is...
I don't know exactly, wheelhomies, I saw comments on this a few times here, and also, I have read that the Virgo will run 'n' hide physically, or emotionally from demanding confrontations. ie. getting blasted by someone.
ltvm
Hey Dyr, congratulations on your new board. I posted this question on one of the other sites. Not sure you'll remember my situation since theres so many of us seeking your great wisdom on Virgoes, but I'm in the Cancer Woman/Virgo Man who seems to be slowly coming around and out of the flip flop, hot/cold stage. I've been getting more text messages and phone calls in the last 2-3 days. How will I know if we go to the next level? Do Virgo men ask? Or is it something thats assumed??
ALLLUV72
I've got to say something about myself here...
**MM steps into the Dy's consulting room**
"Silence / withdrawal - This can be a Test of Wills to see who'll break the silence first. If you stick with it, and he really cares, he'll make a move... But, ya gotta hang tough!"
I am fkning brilliant at this!...Nobody could outdo me on the silent treatment..I win hands down EVERYTIME!!!!!!!!
Love is grand. Scorpio + Virgo love is an f'ing miracle. Yeah, we've been blessed.
Amen to that!..Lets hope I can join you for real on this Scorpio + Virgo bandwagon..patience..He's a workaholic, will have to wait and see when we are meeting..possibly next week..If I haven't scared him off..lol..he texts every day without fail so thats a good thing..
Dyr, thanks, still shocked that he's changing the tempo. Hopefully he'll keep it up, I guess his bluntness in the first few weeks and his flip/flop has my guard up even more, so now I'm even more leary.. Me wanting him hasnt changed just the fact that he might be coming around, kind of makes me nervous....
Wow..thanks for your words virgogotme..But I seriously don't remember pm'ing you..Did I? you weren't called something else were you? lol...you know funny thing is..I really don't feel like i've been through the mill at all..I've had to deal with far worse things in my life..what you've seen on the dxp boards is nothing in comparison..Lol..I shrug things off soooooooo quickly, almost as if they never happened..Guess it doesn't bother me enough..Difficult to penetrate the inner core..Lol..
DY: here you go...
1. Do you consider yourself "book-smart" or "people-smart"? I've read way more serious, scholarly, and classical works than Debra, but her brain runs about 5x faster than mine -
I would say I am both book (as I love reading) and people smart..but mostly people smart. And not to sound arrogant but being book smart doesn't make you street wise..I am a human x-ray machine and can read the intentions of people very quickly...Heard of the term "coup d'oeil"..power of the glance? ..Can spot a fake a million miles off...and assess situations very quickly.
2. Do you genuinely like people? I've gotten the impression from other sources/places that's Scorp's are more often aloof than engaged.
I would say aloof..I geniunly don't like a lot of people..at one point in my life I thought I was too strange cos I hated everyone..Everyone was fake and stupid..I have 0 tolerance for stupid/immature people..
But saying that, I always know whats going on around me so can engage in any conversation you may be having..at times my friends say you wasn't listening to a word I was saying...to avoid being cruel and saying "thats because I lost interest as you took about 7 years getting to the point!"..I just say sorry must've been thinking about something else at the time..I am friendly to most people..but I can be equally as narky and horrid to them..they usually know both sides by the end of the conversation!!!..lol..Turn on the charm offensive..
3. Do you consider yourself to be a disciplined person? Deb has a level of self-control that would be the envy of any Coldstream Guard!
OH MAN I LOVE DISCIPLINE...one of my biggest life time ambitions is to in some lead role in the army..Or work for M15..Secrecy and discipline..LOVE IT..Self discipline is a prized asset..I am so passionate about this..I think its fabulous..I think I will be a strict mother..
4. How often do you cry? Deb's only cried 3 times in 5 months that I've witnessed - and one of those was a "tears of joy" moment. She doesn't squall, or carry on, either. And honestly, her silent weeping hits me harder than Libra ex's hystrionics ever did!
I don't cry often...I can't stand people who just bawl their eyes out at every given opportunity, in fact I just want to slap them about!..It irritates me..The only time I will cry is where my family are concerned..I love them too much. Nothing really shocks me..I have the cold detachment of a surgeon!
I can be the moooodiest person yo
The moodiest person you know that is meant to say..
I have a weakness for power, authority and control...I have started studying Law.
LOL @ virgogotme..aww bless you..Yeah it defo wasn't me...but if you want me to pm you, it can easily be arranged Winking
Let me have you and pluto_muse for dinner today..I am starving and don't have anything inside to cook!.
LMAO @ Pluto_muse...
How about Shaka and spice Tongue
wooohoo...I am hungrrrrrrrry...
Hahahhaahah....oh my god..crime of the century..I couldn't let you die a virgin...That shit aint allowed in the Scorp vocabulary..its against the rules..
Your freeeee...run my child..run..
Shaka..whatcha talking about..I haven't done anything to the Virguy..just yet..although I am sure his imagination is running wild as we speak...poor lad..wait till I get my mits on him..all his xmas's will have come at once Winking
Pluto_muse..yeah we'll screw you and then some before frying you...oh damn..its getting a bit hot in here...
**missy fans herself**
Right, kids..behave yourselfs..I am going out...
Back laterz....
Adios amigos...
Be good..
Ok, Dy: I met someone new who I really like and am looking forward to getting to know him better. He is a Gemini. He likes to shoot pool like I do, he has his life on track, he already introduced me to his daughter and even brought her over last night for dinner, which he picked up. I have spent alot of time with him since last Friday night. We seem to click and he is so easy going and fun to be around. Well, tonight I'm going to the pool tournament and he is going to meet me there. He actually knows some of the people I do, that play in the tournament and I didn't meet him at the bar. Well, ex-virguy might be there which I hope he won't because the last two weeks he wasn't at the pool tournaments. Well, if he is there do you think he might create a problem for me or will he just leave me alone. When I met this guy on Friday we went to the bar later and played pool and Virguy was there watching me the whole time and the week before he was with some young 21 or 22 year old and she was there on Friday but, he wasn't with her. It made me feel unconfortable that he was staring at me alot so, the Gemini guy and I left and went somewhere else. I didn't tell the Gemini guy why I really wanted to leave, I just used the excuse that I wanted to go some place that wasn't so loud. Well, tonight he may or may not be there and if he is he will see me with the same guy. I just am hoping he doesn't create any problems. (and "yes" he is an immature virgo) I am not trying to make Virguy jealous, I just want to enjoy my time with Gemini man and I don't want to stop going to this place because I am playing in a pool league there. I still believe he has alot of feelings for me but, he doesn't want to grow up and I need a man not a boy and it has taken me a long time to get that. I will always care about him but, I have moved on and this guy that came into my life recently is so good for me and I really like him alot. Do you think there will be a problem?
Thanks DY. He did end up showing up last night. He did stare at me alot but, he left me alone. I made sure not to even look at him but, I could see him from the the side of my eyes that he was watching me. I really like this guy I am with now and I want to be comfortable with him without worring about Virguy acting out because I have seen him get jealous before and he does stuff like bump into a guy real hard and then says he appoligizes but he does it as a warning to the guy to stay away but, luckily he did not do any of that except he decided after a while to sit at the table that Gemini Man and I were sitting at and I mean right next to my Gemini man but, he was flirting with some 21 or 22 year old girl which is probably more on his maturity level than I am. I think him sitting by us was to make me uncomfortable but, I didn't move and I just ignored him. This Gemini man is so good to be around because he wants to be with me and even asked me last night if we could be exclusive which of course I said "yes". Thanks for the help. I so happy for you and Deb. I wish you guys the best. It's good to know that there are Virgo Men out there that knows what he wants and just goes after it and not flip-flop about it.
Ok Dyr, I'm ready to throw in the towel. Here's the latest on Cancer Woman/Virgo Man. My Virgo man has his teenaged nephew living with him. The nephew went out of town last weekend for the long holiday. So when the newphew left for the holiday I assumed I'd see him more, he was away for 5 days, I saw him Saturday night and he stayed until mid day Sunday. I wrote him this week and told him he said the nephew was the reason he didnt come over as much as he'd like to, but with him being gone 5 days I only saw him once. I told him I wasnt trying to argue since we both have stress, he's not working and I just resigned, but was wondering what was up. The critical Virgo wrote back, saying to please don't try to tell him how to spend his time, that is why he is single, that he needed time alone!!! then asked if that was ok with me... The Leo part kicked in,(I'm on the Cancer/Leo cusp). I replied by telling him that I thought I was a geninue friend and that he was one as well, that since he is always stressing friends first I thought he'd care enough to come over and hear about what happend with my job situation. He had been stressing that I stay on my current job, but when I told him I resigned he never called or came over (this is all while his nephew is out of town). But with him not working, I've bought groceries for him and his nephew to make sure he's eating and asked if he needed to borrow money. I told him in the text, I see he's the only one with problems and my situation is irrelveant. I guess that struck a nerve, a few hours later, he called disguising his voice and joking like nothing happened, then he asked me to come over, I told him I was busy (which I was) in a much louder then normal voice, he seemed taken back, but at that point I didnt care. It seems everything that happens between us, is on his time, his way. He comes with it's convenient for him, we're intimate when he wants to.. Now I know I'm spoiled (only child here) and not use to not getting my way but I've also got a heart of gold and being a Cancer always try to look after everyone.. How can he lash out then come back like nothings wrong?? Everytime he goes off, if I just wait him out or push back, he'll come back and act like nothing happened, almost like he analyzed it, felt bad and thought man I'd better do something.
HELP...The Leo in me says two tears in a bucket, F it!! But the Cancer says just hold on a little longer...
Ok ok, where has Dyrstr8 gone??
Oh Dyr, your back, I'm sure everyone on this board missed you. Funny how you chat with someone and some how miss when they're unavailable. Good luck with your baby making I'm sure all will turn out well..
As for situation, Mr. Virgo wrote me yesterday when he saw me logged on to yahoo.im and told me he thought of me this past weekend, which meant something but not much. The parts you're missing are he found out right around the time he lost his job, his mom has breast cancer (his aunt passed of breast cancer) so I know he has a lot on his mind. Bills over course are piling up, I did see he started to come around more and call/text more but I just cant take the rude tongue. To me, presentation is everything, and I've been known to be a little clingy but I didnt think me expecting to see him more then once in a 5 day period since he didnt have his nephew living with him seemed too clingy. I just thought he could have worded him needing time alone better.. To me his response was like bitting my head off, then coming back saying heres your head, like what am I suppose to do now that you just told me I'm sweating you.. Maybe I'm being too sensitive but as I've mentioned in other posts this not the first time I've caught the critical tongue. I know he's probably taken back that since we're both not working and have more free time that I havent called or invited him over. But I just dont have the same feelings about him like before, it's like he bruised my ego/pride so much in that one text, I could walk away with no remorse or feelings. Then the fact that he called back like nothing, infuriated me even more, like dont you realize I'm over here sitting fire...
Lastly tell me this, my friend (who's a Virgo born 9/9) told me theres a hugh difference between a Aug Virgo and a Sept Virgo.. Also Dyr you seem to know Cancers pretty well, by the comment you made about us looking after people. What was your experience??
I just dont get it, soon as I wrote my last post, he calls and ask if he could stop over for a few minutes, it's like he sensed I'm ready to throw in the towel. Strange very strange..
Ok Dyr, we know you and the blonde bombshell are practicing your family making, but are you gonna come up for air. You have patients waiting on you... LOL..
Dy,
Is there a way to test for Virguy "Charmer?"
We have our first date Friday night. I'm nervous.
I've been receiving lessens in non-verbal communication and I've been giving feedback, verbally and nonverbally.
I downloaded lots of specific astrological profiles on each of us and together. You were right...a real easy match, but this is going to take a whiile...forever, I hope. It's exciting, actually, to experience the unfolding of mysteries, that actually make my letter to him obsolete and I'm not sure if I should give it to him.
PS - Am I the only one who worries that their Virguy is reading this board? LOL
ltvm
Heres the latest on the Cancer Woman/Virgo man saga. I asked him to come over because I sold some furniture on ebay and the people were coming to pick it up, he seem over concerned with the idea of me having strangers come to my house. He said he'd come over before they arrived to make sure I as safe. I guess this is the overprotective part of the Virgo coming out. Before they came we slept and cuddled, it was so nice.. After he left I was overwhelmed with the closeness, I sent him a text thanking him for his kindness, I guess we were both in tune with the same emotions because he then surprised me by telling me he missed me and really likes cuddling with me. Now he's still out of work and we havent changed our status from "friends" but something tells me he really is IN to me, though he's moving at a slow pace. Later he called about 11:30pm and asked if he and his nephew could come over, I'm thinking wow he just saw me earlier and he wants to come back. So last night we cuddled some more, not to sound corny but our time alone is so pure, I've read most Virgo men arent romantic, but I think I'd take our time being pure with basics such as talking and holding over rose petals on the bed and candles, I'm a Cancer so romance is one of my wants but for some reason the cuddling has me hooked. Lastly he asked if I was going to be in town for Thanksgiving I told him yes and he informed me his uncle was coming in town for the holiday and he had mentioned awhile back to his uncle he met a nice woman and he wanted me to met him. Now my mind is going in 50 diretions...
Dy,
Could I write my Virgo a letter anytime I want to during this period of transition?
ltvm
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