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Posted by AjnaRePosted by Ariel313
Going through a breakup and Im trying to remember and get back to the things that make me happy. Id say singing, making music playlists, writing poetry and journaling, playing in makeup, experimenting with my style, and last but not least...playing pretend.Lol i want to preserve my childlike wonder... ok honestly, its just fun :-)
Playing in makeup eh
I was getting charcoal all over myself creating days ago. I loove getting messy with what I'm using.
My hugs go out to you though and hope that you have a much smoother ride through your transition.
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thanks!!!
Going through a breakup and Im trying to remember and get back to the things that make me happy. Id say singing, making music playlists, writing poetry and journaling, playing in makeup, experimenting with my style, and last but not least...playing pretend.Lol i want to preserve my childlike wonder... ok honestly, its just fun :-)
Wow. Thank you all very much for your response!! As a fish you know we are sensitive but still value honesty, no matter how abrasive it may seem. I appreciate it! Im going to work on forgiving myself today.
I would like some feedback on my current situation. I met my Scorpio man and we hit it off instantly. Despite the fact that he'd been divorced and seperated for a year after a decade long marriage that created two children, who he has custody of, I gave him a chance. I'd been praying for God to send me a good man. It appeared he was the answer gor a while.
He courted me and took me on dates. He introduced me to his fam and friends, even his children. Everything happened so fast. After a few months of dating little skeletons started to come out of the closet. The more time I spent with him, the more red flags I saw and ignored such as his excessive drinking, his hatred towards his ex wife, the depression, the disappearing acts. Fast foward 4 years later. He cheated various times, I found out by going thru his social media and phone. As much as this hurt, I loved him unconditionally. We couldnt stay apart for long. I moved in with him hoping things would get better.
I loved being a domestic woman. I did the laundry, cooked meals, kept the house clean, transported his children to their destinations..etc. It wasnt appreciated much which really sucked the joy out of doing these things. After making me believe he wanted to marry again and have one more child over the course of our relationship, he became more vocal abt how he will never marry again or have more children. This kills a large part of my dream and plans.
What hurt the most is when I found messages to his ex wife in his phone about giving their relationship another try and he asked her not to marry again or have more children!!! Wtf!!! The same woman he claimed hurt him so much is now his love interest??!! I spent years nursing him back to health, building him up, supporting and encouraging him all so he can go and flirt with his ex wife!!!
Not to mention his month long binges on hard drugs which led to mental and emotional abuse I cannot even fit onto this page!!! Still, I love him. I moved out recently after a year of unwedded co op living, everything just became too much.
Im having a hard time. I feel so foolish and so used and so worthless. Its been a month and he seems to have moved on so easily. He blocked me on social media and on his phone. He says I ran him away being possessive, controlling, and jealous. He seems so happy. I just feel stuck. I gave him 5 years of my love trust and youth all to be forgotten and discarded like an old shoe. Im angry at him. Im angry at myself. Im angry at the world. Im sad. Im lonely. Im damaged. I have no muse. Love was my muse and now its gone. I know time heals all wounds but thats easier said than done. Despite how horrid our relationship became, apart of me feels like he gave up on us. How do I cope. How do I smile again?
He courted me and took me on dates. He introduced me to his fam and friends, even his children. Everything happened so fast. After a few months of dating little skeletons started to come out of the closet. The more time I spent with him, the more red flags I saw and ignored such as his excessive drinking, his hatred towards his ex wife, the depression, the disappearing acts. Fast foward 4 years later. He cheated various times, I found out by going thru his social media and phone. As much as this hurt, I loved him unconditionally. We couldnt stay apart for long. I moved in with him hoping things would get better.
I loved being a domestic woman. I did the laundry, cooked meals, kept the house clean, transported his children to their destinations..etc. It wasnt appreciated much which really sucked the joy out of doing these things. After making me believe he wanted to marry again and have one more child over the course of our relationship, he became more vocal abt how he will never marry again or have more children. This kills a large part of my dream and plans.
What hurt the most is when I found messages to his ex wife in his phone about giving their relationship another try and he asked her not to marry again or have more children!!! Wtf!!! The same woman he claimed hurt him so much is now his love interest??!! I spent years nursing him back to health, building him up, supporting and encouraging him all so he can go and flirt with his ex wife!!!
Not to mention his month long binges on hard drugs which led to mental and emotional abuse I cannot even fit onto this page!!! Still, I love him. I moved out recently after a year of unwedded co op living, everything just became too much.
Im having a hard time. I feel so foolish and so used and so worthless. Its been a month and he seems to have moved on so easily. He blocked me on social media and on his phone. He says I ran him away being possessive, controlling, and jealous. He seems so happy. I just feel stuck. I gave him 5 years of my love trust and youth all to be forgotten and discarded like an old shoe. Im angry at him. Im angry at myself. Im angry at the world. Im sad. Im lonely. Im damaged. I have no muse. Love was my muse and now its gone. I know time heals all wounds but thats easier said than done. Despite how horrid our relationship became, apart of me feels like he gave up on us. How do I cope. How do I smile again?
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