cancerious20 joined March 29, 2013
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ya i think that is it...she just has to be sure of her emotions and she isn't just yet.
I spent all day Saturday with her, almost all of Sunday, and then Monday as well. Slept there every night. She told me who the other guy was. We talked about it and she says she is completely done with him. She said a lot that she is scared to commit to me bc she knows its it, done forever. She said she talked to her mom about everything for 3 hours and her moms response was you keep answering your own questions. As in she knows what she wants. Which, I have known what she wants the whole time and that is me. It's weird. She kept saying that we need to slow down, but that lasted for like a day. She couldn't with me and her actions just kept showing it. I think she has finally realized what she is doing. When we talked about things she once again said "I don't know what I'm doing with anyone else, I have known forever that you are what I want, but I just had to make sure of things and figure it out on my own." Things are just amazing right now. I know she is focused on me and wants to be with me. We just need a little more time so she isn't as scared. A little more time so I can keep my eye on her as well, although I am not doubting her anymore on what is going on, but still.
I told her I wasn't quite ready to be official yet. She kinda questioned me about it. Saying "what would be dif" I was like nothing really. She is like then why aren't you ready? We both know that we are together right now, but just not label. She is scared to commit for her reasons and I am as well. She said she needs just another week or so. I don't put a time table on it. 2 of her friends now have told me she is in love with me. Shit is so crazy. For now things are amaazing and I think this will happen within a month or so.. Excited..
I spent all day Saturday with her, almost all of Sunday, and then Monday as well. Slept there every night. She told me who the other guy was. We talked about it and she says she is completely done with him. She said a lot that she is scared to commit to me bc she knows its it, done forever. She said she talked to her mom about everything for 3 hours and her moms response was you keep answering your own questions. As in she knows what she wants. Which, I have known what she wants the whole time and that is me. It's weird. She kept saying that we need to slow down, but that lasted for like a day. She couldn't with me and her actions just kept showing it. I think she has finally realized what she is doing. When we talked about things she once again said "I don't know what I'm doing with anyone else, I have known forever that you are what I want, but I just had to make sure of things and figure it out on my own." Things are just amazing right now. I know she is focused on me and wants to be with me. We just need a little more time so she isn't as scared. A little more time so I can keep my eye on her as well, although I am not doubting her anymore on what is going on, but still.
I told her I wasn't quite ready to be official yet. She kinda questioned me about it. Saying "what would be dif" I was like nothing really. She is like then why aren't you ready? We both know that we are together right now, but just not label. She is scared to commit for her reasons and I am as well. She said she needs just another week or so. I don't put a time table on it. 2 of her friends now have told me she is in love with me. Shit is so crazy. For now things are amaazing and I think this will happen within a month or so.. Excited..
@cappguy...
Don't get me wrong man, I def feel like is exactly what she was doing. I mean that is pretty obvious. That is why I told her I'm not ok with this. That convo was last Mon/Tues. I was short in text and she noticed, saw her last Thursday and things were fine. Then it was "i miss you" on Friday. Then went out together on Saturday and that is when she said I want to just focus on you. Like I have already said, I told her she has to prove that to me.
Really things haven't changed at all except for the 3 days or so she left 2 weekends ago. It's like she freaked out those days, idk. She comes home and tells me we need to slow down bc she is still talking to someone else. Which like you said she wants her cake and eat it too. I was like um f that. Maybe she was confused or something, but since she has been back home things have been the same and getting better by the day. We hung out 5 of 7 days leading into her leaving, she comes back and says we need to slow down and hang less frequent, but I still wanna see what happens. Now we have hung 4 of the last 6 days. Literally makes no sense. She says one thing and then does another. She text me all day everyday. Has said she misses me everyday the last 6 days or so. She said she took the time to think about things and realized that I am what she wants. So far it seems true. I am def still watching her. I am still distant in a way. I don't really share my feelings much or affirm her. I don't say I miss you first. I haven't asked her to hang out. Everything has been on her.
Idk what to say. I guess time will tell. As of right now it does seem like she is focused on me and not as scared to say how she feels and be more vulnerable. It's just confusing bc she had a speed bump while leaving, but comes back and now we are taking off again (which we always do.) Maybe she really did realize this is it, either way atm I'm still being cautious.
Don't get me wrong man, I def feel like is exactly what she was doing. I mean that is pretty obvious. That is why I told her I'm not ok with this. That convo was last Mon/Tues. I was short in text and she noticed, saw her last Thursday and things were fine. Then it was "i miss you" on Friday. Then went out together on Saturday and that is when she said I want to just focus on you. Like I have already said, I told her she has to prove that to me.
Really things haven't changed at all except for the 3 days or so she left 2 weekends ago. It's like she freaked out those days, idk. She comes home and tells me we need to slow down bc she is still talking to someone else. Which like you said she wants her cake and eat it too. I was like um f that. Maybe she was confused or something, but since she has been back home things have been the same and getting better by the day. We hung out 5 of 7 days leading into her leaving, she comes back and says we need to slow down and hang less frequent, but I still wanna see what happens. Now we have hung 4 of the last 6 days. Literally makes no sense. She says one thing and then does another. She text me all day everyday. Has said she misses me everyday the last 6 days or so. She said she took the time to think about things and realized that I am what she wants. So far it seems true. I am def still watching her. I am still distant in a way. I don't really share my feelings much or affirm her. I don't say I miss you first. I haven't asked her to hang out. Everything has been on her.
Idk what to say. I guess time will tell. As of right now it does seem like she is focused on me and not as scared to say how she feels and be more vulnerable. It's just confusing bc she had a speed bump while leaving, but comes back and now we are taking off again (which we always do.) Maybe she really did realize this is it, either way atm I'm still being cautious.
I mean she didn't say 100% she is gonna focus on me. She said she is gonna try her hardest to do so bc all things lead her to me and that what she was doing before wasn't working for her. That is why I am gonna be watching her to see how consistent she remains. I think this is what she wants (for now) - to focus on me and see where we go etc. That doesn't mean in 5 days she won't say something completely different.
We have always talked all day everyday. That has never changed. She has always said she has never talked to anyone the way we talk.
I understand that a woman wants me to come across trusting. I'm sure that is attractive. I really like this girl and obviously wanna see where this goes, but I don't want to be played a fool. I am rather certain that when she went outta town 2 weekends ago she went to see this other guy. I understand that she felt like she couldn't tell me bc of what I might do. Like argue, leave her, etc. At that time we kinda both admitted we were together w/o a label. Like she said just talking to this other guy makes her feel like she is cheated on me. I think she made up where she was going that weekend to keep things level between us. Now she can't tell me a damn thing about the guy bc if she does I will start piecing things together. She knows how I am. Once you cross me in a certain way you are zip to me after that. So she is scared to tell me what really happened bc I'll find out she lied about where she was and now a bunch of other small lies to cover up that big one. I'm about 95% certain on this. So, idk if too trusting is the word, bc just saying this now obviously I don't completely trust her. There are just too many things not right about this situation. I can understand why she would lie tho bc when we are hanging out lots and talking daily it would be very hard for her to say "I am going to visit this other guy I'm talking to for the weekend." I just know she is lying about something and it's very hard for me to deal with right now. So I don't wanna be too trusting and look dumb.
We have always talked all day everyday. That has never changed. She has always said she has never talked to anyone the way we talk.
I understand that a woman wants me to come across trusting. I'm sure that is attractive. I really like this girl and obviously wanna see where this goes, but I don't want to be played a fool. I am rather certain that when she went outta town 2 weekends ago she went to see this other guy. I understand that she felt like she couldn't tell me bc of what I might do. Like argue, leave her, etc. At that time we kinda both admitted we were together w/o a label. Like she said just talking to this other guy makes her feel like she is cheated on me. I think she made up where she was going that weekend to keep things level between us. Now she can't tell me a damn thing about the guy bc if she does I will start piecing things together. She knows how I am. Once you cross me in a certain way you are zip to me after that. So she is scared to tell me what really happened bc I'll find out she lied about where she was and now a bunch of other small lies to cover up that big one. I'm about 95% certain on this. So, idk if too trusting is the word, bc just saying this now obviously I don't completely trust her. There are just too many things not right about this situation. I can understand why she would lie tho bc when we are hanging out lots and talking daily it would be very hard for her to say "I am going to visit this other guy I'm talking to for the weekend." I just know she is lying about something and it's very hard for me to deal with right now. So I don't wanna be too trusting and look dumb.
Even when she gets disappointed by me, after 3 more weeks of talking we are flying away. This time is different bc I have been consistent. This one is on her. All I'm saying is that no matter what is going on in her head at anytime since we have been talking we always get to the same great place. This past time before she slowed things down a week and a half ago we had reached new heights. She slowed us down because of this other guy. Now it seems she is done with that and focused on me. We'll see. It does seem like we are headed down the path to the great place again for sure. She has called me after we hung out on Thursday everyday since. Give it about 2 more weeks and I guess I'll see where I'm at with her.
Do I seem too trusting here? Am I a giant idiot for putting up with all this? I ask this bc I'm a one woman guy. I'm serious about dating this girl. I feel like it will be so worth it once I finally get her over that hump, but it has been a process. I tell her this and she says "it took me 5 damn years to get you here, you can be a little patient with me." Something along those lines lol. It's hard for me bc I like her so much. When we are together it really is written all over her face how smitten she is by me, which even she admits. Once we are away tho she gets to thinking and that is when things sometimes go to hell. I just don't want to be some giant idiot here for putting up with all this crap I think may be going on. Seems like I can't say a word about it, if I do it annoys her, pushes her away. If I hold it in then sometimes I want to explode. Idk what to do sometimes. But thinking about things she is basically always getting her way.
Only good thing is that she said she needed to figure all this sh1t out on her own and she finally has. Focused on me now. Ill keep an eye on her. See where it goes.
Do I seem too trusting here? Am I a giant idiot for putting up with all this? I ask this bc I'm a one woman guy. I'm serious about dating this girl. I feel like it will be so worth it once I finally get her over that hump, but it has been a process. I tell her this and she says "it took me 5 damn years to get you here, you can be a little patient with me." Something along those lines lol. It's hard for me bc I like her so much. When we are together it really is written all over her face how smitten she is by me, which even she admits. Once we are away tho she gets to thinking and that is when things sometimes go to hell. I just don't want to be some giant idiot here for putting up with all this crap I think may be going on. Seems like I can't say a word about it, if I do it annoys her, pushes her away. If I hold it in then sometimes I want to explode. Idk what to do sometimes. But thinking about things she is basically always getting her way.
Only good thing is that she said she needed to figure all this sh1t out on her own and she finally has. Focused on me now. Ill keep an eye on her. See where it goes.
@Rapunzel....
She hasn't really discussed other guys. Usually they only come up when she has dropped them. A week and a half ago she was telling me she was slowly dropping all the guys she talks to. We haven't really had long conversations about other guys either. I asked her if the other guy was her x bf through text, she said no. Then said again at dinner a lot of things lead me to believe it's him and she swore it wasn't. I want to believe her, but idk. It's very hard for me to trust ppl in general. She hasn't ever given me a reason to doubt her tho.
I am not a territorial or jealous guy whatsoever or at least I haven't been in the past. However, something is not quite right in this scenario so that is why I have questions. She is the type of person that would tell me if it was a random John from a bar. She hasn't. I have questioned about who it is bc she is hiding something. She obviously would rather me ask and not trust what she is saying than to just tell me. It's obvious she is scared to tell me.
I will continue to be myself and see where this goes. I will try my hardest to just forget about it and trust that she is only focused on me now. However, I will proceed with caution bc she still needs to prove to me she is going to remain consistent. So far so good. I do believe her when she says she wants to focus on me and that everything leads to believe it's me she should be with. Time will tell. I will guard my heart. I don't think something is off about the other guy so no need to keep an eye on him.
I agree that if she was serious about ONLY me it wouldn't be this hard. I haven't encouraged her to drop anyone. All I tell her is that I know if she does wanna date around it will just make her realize how special we have it and pull us closer. That I am very confident in me and her. She has done the dropping of the guys on her own and apparently just recently decided to focus on just me. Her words were she is gonna try her hardest to just focus on me bc everything leads her to me. I know how she feels about me that isn't the problem. I just know she really wants to make 100% certain it's me she wants to be with that way there are no "what ifs" bc she feels like once she gets with me she is done forever. Her words. Talk daily, says she misses me, text all day. It's only been a few days, but good so far. No matter who she is talking to or what she says we always get to the same amazing place....
She hasn't really discussed other guys. Usually they only come up when she has dropped them. A week and a half ago she was telling me she was slowly dropping all the guys she talks to. We haven't really had long conversations about other guys either. I asked her if the other guy was her x bf through text, she said no. Then said again at dinner a lot of things lead me to believe it's him and she swore it wasn't. I want to believe her, but idk. It's very hard for me to trust ppl in general. She hasn't ever given me a reason to doubt her tho.
I am not a territorial or jealous guy whatsoever or at least I haven't been in the past. However, something is not quite right in this scenario so that is why I have questions. She is the type of person that would tell me if it was a random John from a bar. She hasn't. I have questioned about who it is bc she is hiding something. She obviously would rather me ask and not trust what she is saying than to just tell me. It's obvious she is scared to tell me.
I will continue to be myself and see where this goes. I will try my hardest to just forget about it and trust that she is only focused on me now. However, I will proceed with caution bc she still needs to prove to me she is going to remain consistent. So far so good. I do believe her when she says she wants to focus on me and that everything leads to believe it's me she should be with. Time will tell. I will guard my heart. I don't think something is off about the other guy so no need to keep an eye on him.
I agree that if she was serious about ONLY me it wouldn't be this hard. I haven't encouraged her to drop anyone. All I tell her is that I know if she does wanna date around it will just make her realize how special we have it and pull us closer. That I am very confident in me and her. She has done the dropping of the guys on her own and apparently just recently decided to focus on just me. Her words were she is gonna try her hardest to just focus on me bc everything leads her to me. I know how she feels about me that isn't the problem. I just know she really wants to make 100% certain it's me she wants to be with that way there are no "what ifs" bc she feels like once she gets with me she is done forever. Her words. Talk daily, says she misses me, text all day. It's only been a few days, but good so far. No matter who she is talking to or what she says we always get to the same amazing place....
In the end I'm not really sure what all matters. Bc she says she is gonna try hard to be consistent with me and put all her focus on that and not talking to any other guys to see where we go. So far so good.
I asked her if she was gonna tell the other guy she isn't talking to him anymore she said no, she just wasn't gonna speak to him. Everything is so weird about this guy. I honestly don't know what to do about it. If I con't to question her about it , it's going to drive her crazy. But she def is leaving so many holes. Why can't she just say something about him if she has nothing to hide? So annoying and not fair to me. I have to push on tho I guess. If she is being serious about focusing on me then I guess nothing matters. I don't think it should be this hard.
I asked her if she was gonna tell the other guy she isn't talking to him anymore she said no, she just wasn't gonna speak to him. Everything is so weird about this guy. I honestly don't know what to do about it. If I con't to question her about it , it's going to drive her crazy. But she def is leaving so many holes. Why can't she just say something about him if she has nothing to hide? So annoying and not fair to me. I have to push on tho I guess. If she is being serious about focusing on me then I guess nothing matters. I don't think it should be this hard.
I mean something is up obv.
Things were great. Then she leaves for a few days. Comes back and all I hear now is we need to slow down bc she is still interested in another guy. It really seems like to me she visited this other guy to kinda see what was going on there. She may have felt like maybe there was so she got home and said we need to slow down bc of it. Then thought about it for a few days, saw me last Thursday and saw how much she liked me. IDKKKK fellas. Last Friday she told me that she wanted me to come over and that she missed me, then Saturday we hang out and things are great again. We have talked everyday since. Either way I think she did take the time to realize that all signs lead to me. I believe her when she says that and that she is gonna just try to focus on me now. Again she still has to prove that.
The problem I have is her keeping this other guy from me. She has showed me pics and told me names of other guys she talked to and dropped. None of them were too serious tho. This other guy now obviously is. Every time I mention him she will not say a thing about him tho. If it was some random guy she would say who he is, show me a picture, tell me his name, SOMETHING. It is so odd she won't say a thing. She won't bc she is obviously afraid of what my reaction will be. If it was some random obv I wouldn't care, which makes me feel like it's at least a guy I have heard of and know. That is why I questioned it being her x bf. I feel like it could be one of two dif guys that she knows I wouldn't care for it to be. Both live 2 hours away. So she could of easily went to see them last weekend. This is just very hard for me bc she is obviously hiding something or she would give me some info on the guy. She has sworn up and down that it isn't her x. Whoever the guy is I am almost certain he doesn't live here bc I see all her pics she post on fb and there are never any guys but me in pics. I think she just has to be lying somehow... and now she is building up all the lies and she can't tel the truth now. Nothing makes sense to me. Not having sex with the guy in talking to him for 8 months, not that she is a slut but that def doesn't add up. Plus I was home for in nov. and dec and she was trying to lock me down then.
Things were great. Then she leaves for a few days. Comes back and all I hear now is we need to slow down bc she is still interested in another guy. It really seems like to me she visited this other guy to kinda see what was going on there. She may have felt like maybe there was so she got home and said we need to slow down bc of it. Then thought about it for a few days, saw me last Thursday and saw how much she liked me. IDKKKK fellas. Last Friday she told me that she wanted me to come over and that she missed me, then Saturday we hang out and things are great again. We have talked everyday since. Either way I think she did take the time to realize that all signs lead to me. I believe her when she says that and that she is gonna just try to focus on me now. Again she still has to prove that.
The problem I have is her keeping this other guy from me. She has showed me pics and told me names of other guys she talked to and dropped. None of them were too serious tho. This other guy now obviously is. Every time I mention him she will not say a thing about him tho. If it was some random guy she would say who he is, show me a picture, tell me his name, SOMETHING. It is so odd she won't say a thing. She won't bc she is obviously afraid of what my reaction will be. If it was some random obv I wouldn't care, which makes me feel like it's at least a guy I have heard of and know. That is why I questioned it being her x bf. I feel like it could be one of two dif guys that she knows I wouldn't care for it to be. Both live 2 hours away. So she could of easily went to see them last weekend. This is just very hard for me bc she is obviously hiding something or she would give me some info on the guy. She has sworn up and down that it isn't her x. Whoever the guy is I am almost certain he doesn't live here bc I see all her pics she post on fb and there are never any guys but me in pics. I think she just has to be lying somehow... and now she is building up all the lies and she can't tel the truth now. Nothing makes sense to me. Not having sex with the guy in talking to him for 8 months, not that she is a slut but that def doesn't add up. Plus I was home for in nov. and dec and she was trying to lock me down then.
@Rapunzel
Since she has said those words to me I have been semi distant. Friday she text me that she missed me. I was shocked. Said she wanted to see me yesterday all day. We had dinner and hung out all night. At dinner she had a lot to say. She said that she is very sorry for how she has been this past week. That she has done a lot of thinking lately and she was gonna try to keep all her focus on me. Went on to say that she is having a very hard time juggling 2 dif ppl, but all signs lead her to me. That what she is doing now obviously wasn't working for her and she has been very inconsistent. So that now she was just gonna try to see where me and her go only and not talk to the other guy anymore.
She said she has been talking to this other guy for 8 months. I literally know nothing else about him and she won't tell me a thing, which I actually find very odd. I have questioned her about it being her x bf bc a lot of things make sense for it to be him but she swears up and down it isn't him. They broke up a year ago, but still talk on occasion and apparently knows we talk and got very mad about it lately. She did say they never had sex. She said she was interested in him, but it seems she is done. She went on to say that the guy doesn't compare to me. That every time we start talking we end up getting to an amazing place and the other guy just can't compete with that. Like we take off and the other guy just gets left behind. Which is why she tried to slow us down in the first place. She constantly says that she hates the "what if" feeling. Like it seems like she is trying to make sure 100% that she wants to come toward me before she does?? idk? I used to think she was just scared to get with me bc she feels like she will be with me forever, but now I'm thinking that it does/did have a lot to do with another guy, which she has said lol. She did say those things scare her tho. Honestly idk what to think. 10 days ago we were flying away saying how great of a place we were in, 5 days ago she was saying we need to slow down so she can learn more about her other interest. Now she is saying she wants to put all her focus on me. She is saying the right things atm but I'm still lost....
Since she has said those words to me I have been semi distant. Friday she text me that she missed me. I was shocked. Said she wanted to see me yesterday all day. We had dinner and hung out all night. At dinner she had a lot to say. She said that she is very sorry for how she has been this past week. That she has done a lot of thinking lately and she was gonna try to keep all her focus on me. Went on to say that she is having a very hard time juggling 2 dif ppl, but all signs lead her to me. That what she is doing now obviously wasn't working for her and she has been very inconsistent. So that now she was just gonna try to see where me and her go only and not talk to the other guy anymore.
She said she has been talking to this other guy for 8 months. I literally know nothing else about him and she won't tell me a thing, which I actually find very odd. I have questioned her about it being her x bf bc a lot of things make sense for it to be him but she swears up and down it isn't him. They broke up a year ago, but still talk on occasion and apparently knows we talk and got very mad about it lately. She did say they never had sex. She said she was interested in him, but it seems she is done. She went on to say that the guy doesn't compare to me. That every time we start talking we end up getting to an amazing place and the other guy just can't compete with that. Like we take off and the other guy just gets left behind. Which is why she tried to slow us down in the first place. She constantly says that she hates the "what if" feeling. Like it seems like she is trying to make sure 100% that she wants to come toward me before she does?? idk? I used to think she was just scared to get with me bc she feels like she will be with me forever, but now I'm thinking that it does/did have a lot to do with another guy, which she has said lol. She did say those things scare her tho. Honestly idk what to think. 10 days ago we were flying away saying how great of a place we were in, 5 days ago she was saying we need to slow down so she can learn more about her other interest. Now she is saying she wants to put all her focus on me. She is saying the right things atm but I'm still lost....
@cappa... I appreciate your post...
First off she didn't catch feelings. She has had feelings for me for 5 years. I actually saw her today and we talked about a few things. Before we even started talking about everything she was like I just had a bad few days. I told her that it seems to me like she saw us going down a very serious road. We had hung out 5 of 7 days and things were getting more serious by the day. I said I know you love your life (single life) going out all the time, hanging with friends, getting guys attn, and being a social butterfly. She was like yes I do love that. Then I said and it also seems like you love hanging with and being with me as well. She was like yes I love that too. I said basically it seems like you having a really difficult time deciding/balancing out the 2. She said yes, it's very hard for me. I also said something about how I don't think that this other guy is much of the problem. She said well he is part of it, but not the problem. I said every time you say you are talking to someone else you always say the don't compare to me. She was like ya well they don't. I said it seems like to me that you feel like once you get with me that is it for you. You will be tied down forever. She was like ya pretty much.
So basically, she just isn't ready for all that. She is trying to get her cake and eat it to. She wants to go out and have a good time with her life, but also have her life with me as well. I said it seems like you are trying to tell me that you don't want a relationship with me or at least not one anytime soon and you just won't tell me that bc then I might say seeee yaaaa. She was like no that really isn't it, it's just right now I don't know - I want to keep talking to you and see what happens. It's just odd. Next week she could wanna see me for 5 days straight and then right after that be like o shitttt we are getting close, I need to pull back. I said to her that every time we hit a speed bump we always overcome it and then fly away so it's gonna happen again. She said yes, I know. Who the hell knows guys.
First off she didn't catch feelings. She has had feelings for me for 5 years. I actually saw her today and we talked about a few things. Before we even started talking about everything she was like I just had a bad few days. I told her that it seems to me like she saw us going down a very serious road. We had hung out 5 of 7 days and things were getting more serious by the day. I said I know you love your life (single life) going out all the time, hanging with friends, getting guys attn, and being a social butterfly. She was like yes I do love that. Then I said and it also seems like you love hanging with and being with me as well. She was like yes I love that too. I said basically it seems like you having a really difficult time deciding/balancing out the 2. She said yes, it's very hard for me. I also said something about how I don't think that this other guy is much of the problem. She said well he is part of it, but not the problem. I said every time you say you are talking to someone else you always say the don't compare to me. She was like ya well they don't. I said it seems like to me that you feel like once you get with me that is it for you. You will be tied down forever. She was like ya pretty much.
So basically, she just isn't ready for all that. She is trying to get her cake and eat it to. She wants to go out and have a good time with her life, but also have her life with me as well. I said it seems like you are trying to tell me that you don't want a relationship with me or at least not one anytime soon and you just won't tell me that bc then I might say seeee yaaaa. She was like no that really isn't it, it's just right now I don't know - I want to keep talking to you and see what happens. It's just odd. Next week she could wanna see me for 5 days straight and then right after that be like o shitttt we are getting close, I need to pull back. I said to her that every time we hit a speed bump we always overcome it and then fly away so it's gonna happen again. She said yes, I know. Who the hell knows guys.
i don't say anything. She writes plzzz dont hate me, my mind will change everyday, sorry you have to go through with this. I said stop apologizing for how you feel. Then she goes lets ride it out we still have a lot to learn about each other in real life, i think i should see you thursday. Then goes I'm fucking bipolar, our cyber love is fogging my vision. I told her well we do know a lot about each other and still learning a lot, but you are saying we need to stop this. I said stop thinking so much and just relax man. Things would be a lot easier if you would just go with what you feel and not think so fucking much.
Honestly for the first time ever today I questioned if this girl was worth it. That sucked so fucking bad. I mean 4 days ago she was telling me about how happy she was with me, talking about our future, texting me she missed me daily. Now this. It's too much. I said what changed your mind. She said being away from you for a few days and thinking about things. Im not sure what I should do. I think she actually feels the things she is telling me. That we are moving fast and she feels bad about talking to other guys, but why the sudden change outta no where. Why did the guy mean nothing and now all of a sudden it's we need to slow down bc she doesn't want any what ifs. I can't tell if it's just with us she feels like she will be locked down forever and it scares her or what. Seemed like soon as I told her I didn't like what was going on she was kinda like ooo sh1t I dont wanna lose this guy and was all nice saying we should hang. Girls be crazy yo
Honestly for the first time ever today I questioned if this girl was worth it. That sucked so fucking bad. I mean 4 days ago she was telling me about how happy she was with me, talking about our future, texting me she missed me daily. Now this. It's too much. I said what changed your mind. She said being away from you for a few days and thinking about things. Im not sure what I should do. I think she actually feels the things she is telling me. That we are moving fast and she feels bad about talking to other guys, but why the sudden change outta no where. Why did the guy mean nothing and now all of a sudden it's we need to slow down bc she doesn't want any what ifs. I can't tell if it's just with us she feels like she will be locked down forever and it scares her or what. Seemed like soon as I told her I didn't like what was going on she was kinda like ooo sh1t I dont wanna lose this guy and was all nice saying we should hang. Girls be crazy yo
just a update... talked to my girl today about a lotta stuff.
She said she feels like the next guy she gets serious with is gonna be the one she gets married to and wasn't sure if she was ready for that. She said there is still a lot she doesn't know. I said why do you keep saying that bullshit. You know exactly how you feel about me and what you want. She said true. I said you are just crazy about me and it scares the living shit outta you. She goes mayyyyybe. She then said she still talks to one other guy she is interested in, and when she talks to him she feels like she is cheating on me. Then she went on to say she doesn't even know why she talks to other guys bc they don't compare to me.
She went on to say that things with us just seem to be moving very fast. That we need to just chill. She said that she needs us to slow down bc she is still talking to this other guy she is interested in and doesn't wanna feel bad about it. Essentially asking me and her to slow down so she can learn more about another guy. She doesn't want any "what ifs." She said she feels like with us she is gonna need to make a decision soon and isn't ready to that bc of this other guy. She feels like we are basically in a relationship so its hard for her to be talking to someone else so that if me and her aren't as close she wont feel as bad. She said she could try to keep things how they were. I said obv you don't want that. Then she goes "its not that i don't." Then says when she is with me she wants things to be the same just not hang out as frequent. We have hung out like 8x this month, prol like 5 sleep overs. Then I said I'm not really sure how I feel about you telling me we need to chill out so you can let some other guy creep into your life. She got defensive and said "so you are writing me off." She said she told me about the guys from the beginning. I said you are in no way consistent with that, telling me daily they mean nothing compared to me. THen she says she is going to bed....
She said she feels like the next guy she gets serious with is gonna be the one she gets married to and wasn't sure if she was ready for that. She said there is still a lot she doesn't know. I said why do you keep saying that bullshit. You know exactly how you feel about me and what you want. She said true. I said you are just crazy about me and it scares the living shit outta you. She goes mayyyyybe. She then said she still talks to one other guy she is interested in, and when she talks to him she feels like she is cheating on me. Then she went on to say she doesn't even know why she talks to other guys bc they don't compare to me.
She went on to say that things with us just seem to be moving very fast. That we need to just chill. She said that she needs us to slow down bc she is still talking to this other guy she is interested in and doesn't wanna feel bad about it. Essentially asking me and her to slow down so she can learn more about another guy. She doesn't want any "what ifs." She said she feels like with us she is gonna need to make a decision soon and isn't ready to that bc of this other guy. She feels like we are basically in a relationship so its hard for her to be talking to someone else so that if me and her aren't as close she wont feel as bad. She said she could try to keep things how they were. I said obv you don't want that. Then she goes "its not that i don't." Then says when she is with me she wants things to be the same just not hang out as frequent. We have hung out like 8x this month, prol like 5 sleep overs. Then I said I'm not really sure how I feel about you telling me we need to chill out so you can let some other guy creep into your life. She got defensive and said "so you are writing me off." She said she told me about the guys from the beginning. I said you are in no way consistent with that, telling me daily they mean nothing compared to me. THen she says she is going to bed....
For now, I can accept this. I accept her for her and I like her for her. This is just something new I have learned about her and virgos in general. From what I understand it takes a long time and a lot of patience and understanding to finally capture a virgo. I also have heard that once you do it's truly amazing. I am banking on that, trust me. I have seen this girl open up and show her emotional loving side before. I just turned away bc of the place in my life I was. It was fantastic though.
I do agree that sometimes it isn't fair. You say "who is loving me" "who is feeding my soul" I guess I really don't know what to say about that. You have to make a decision ya know. You either think it will be worth it or you don't. In my situation I know that I have been unfair to her for a lot longer than she has to me. So again, I'm sure my situation is different. I try to focus on the positive things with us. How amazing our time is together. How amazing our convos are once I get her opening up. Yes, it does seem like we are in a hiccup stage, but I'll just fight through it. There are obstacles all over the place when you are trying to get to where you wanna be. It's how you overcome them that will define you and the relationship. I don't give up easily and obviously neither does she.
You say that I will get tired of it and her at some point. I guess in theory you are right. I don't really know how long I can do all of this. Time will tell. I don't know how virgos think, but from what I read if they are saying things like "i miss you" "i can't wait to see you" then that is a very amazing sign. So, I am getting close it seems. She also said twice that things were fine between us and you guys said to believe her. So, I'm sure things will pick back up. She is leaving town again this weekend so who knows what will happen lol
I do agree that sometimes it isn't fair. You say "who is loving me" "who is feeding my soul" I guess I really don't know what to say about that. You have to make a decision ya know. You either think it will be worth it or you don't. In my situation I know that I have been unfair to her for a lot longer than she has to me. So again, I'm sure my situation is different. I try to focus on the positive things with us. How amazing our time is together. How amazing our convos are once I get her opening up. Yes, it does seem like we are in a hiccup stage, but I'll just fight through it. There are obstacles all over the place when you are trying to get to where you wanna be. It's how you overcome them that will define you and the relationship. I don't give up easily and obviously neither does she.
You say that I will get tired of it and her at some point. I guess in theory you are right. I don't really know how long I can do all of this. Time will tell. I don't know how virgos think, but from what I read if they are saying things like "i miss you" "i can't wait to see you" then that is a very amazing sign. So, I am getting close it seems. She also said twice that things were fine between us and you guys said to believe her. So, I'm sure things will pick back up. She is leaving town again this weekend so who knows what will happen lol
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Virgo
Recent post I have explained this situation between me and this virgirl. I have disappointed her a lot and been inconsi
@cancerious20
Joined: Mar 29, 2013 · Topics: 4 · Posts: 42
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Joined: Mar 29, 2013 · Topics: 4 · Posts: 42
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@cancerious20
Joined: Mar 29, 2013 · Topics: 4 · Posts: 42