She has been writing love poems when not studying. Is this a secret side of her? She has never done it before. Prior to the break during the beginning of the relationships she said that I was her first love and she never felt like like this before.
Hello,
I am in a long distance relationship with a Pisces woman for one year. She's beautiful and wonderful. We meet 3-4 times a year in a different country. We enjoy exploring different culture and the plane rides and countries. Our relationship formed solely based on communication. We trust each other. We empathize with each other. I am a Taurus and I'm very realistic and logical about things. I try to help her with finding passion and career. She has been interested so far. However, she's in school and she works at a place she doesn't like. We had an emotional talk before her last semester exam started, she feels like I'm too scared and feels like it was a routine (we used to call and text each other everyday. Thus that's why she said she felt like it was a routine) and then said she feels worthless, she feels like she's not established. Her feelings were everywhere but I was strong and tried explaining her that this is our down time of our relationship and it's important for us to battle through this. She then said, If I can give her some space and time so she can contemplate on her feelings and focus on exams. Prior to the break, she did say she wants to see me after all this so we can sit down and talk about our relationship and future. (on our trips we did envision a perfect future of us and she was on the same level with me so It's not like we haven't thought about it).
I wrote her a letter during the first week of break expressing that I really miss her. She wrote back and saying she loves me and she feels like a darkness is seeping her so she wants to battle it through. I disappeared for few days and she called me saying she misses me and we expressed our love to each other by saying "I love you" and we also laughed. She also said "Thank you for being strong" It felt really good. I then sent her another letter with a care package so she can get through her exam stresses perfectly. (Tea for soothing and some snacks). She messaged me a saying Thank you and she's loving the package and I disappeared for a week. After a week, I saw a message from her saying morning and hope I'm fine. I replied back and asked is everything ok and she said all is fine. I brought back some memories of food we ate on our trips and she liked it. I also sent her kisses and I just got a smiley face back but no kisses. She then asked she might need help with an essay of hers and I said I'm here for her. We called and she asked me how I'm doing and I asked about her, we then got emotional and she said she loves me and I said it back. She also said she wants to share something vulnerable when we're together and if I think she's disturbed, I can leave. She was vulnerable to me before but she said she hasn't been completely honest and was scared that I'd leave her but now she feels a part of her should be known for a partner that's worthy of her.
We're still on a break. It's been 4 weeks. She still has exams and finals and it's holidays so she spending time with her family and friends. She doesn't take the initiative to message me anymore though. We used to call pet names, and I still do but she doesn't. Her replies are delayed and she doesn't frequently do it anymore. I am respecting her space but whenever she messages me, it's like she's a complete new person. As a Taurus I am fixed and the way she's being so far doesn't feel the same to me anymore.
What's going on? Do Pisces disappear like this? Did we just grew? Am I being too nice? Should I disappear for a little while?
I miss her and I feel helpless.