Ebonyjade joined June 20, 2011
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That's what encouraged me to give him the Christmas card stating how I would like to start fresh in 2013 and be friends again. So when he came back to the office mid last week I knew he reacted positvely as he sat with me but then I barely acknolwedged him. I know..stupid! I just wish he wouldn't play games as even though I know I haven't been innocent, I've explained to him I act strangely sometimes when I'm attracted someone. I've been quite upfront with him.
Uker83 - thank you for reminding me to have fun with it. I get so caught up in my emotions sometimes. But hte last thing I've been is clingy, if anyhting I've been the exact opposite. He said Good Morning to me today but he sat on the opposite side of the office. Was his little performance (purposely ignoring me last week despite sitting with me when there were plenty of other seats to sit at) just a little act to get my attention? Or was that his way of telling me he wasn't interested? So confusing!
Oh - and another thing. When I mentioned before that I had started seeing someone else, it was only a couple of dates, nothing serious. If that was the case, I would still not be obsessing over this Virg!
Thanks!
Uker83 - thank you for reminding me to have fun with it. I get so caught up in my emotions sometimes. But hte last thing I've been is clingy, if anyhting I've been the exact opposite. He said Good Morning to me today but he sat on the opposite side of the office. Was his little performance (purposely ignoring me last week despite sitting with me when there were plenty of other seats to sit at) just a little act to get my attention? Or was that his way of telling me he wasn't interested? So confusing!
Oh - and another thing. When I mentioned before that I had started seeing someone else, it was only a couple of dates, nothing serious. If that was the case, I would still not be obsessing over this Virg!
Thanks!
GeminilovesVirgo...the Virgo web..you got that right! But I really hope that what you say in regards to it being worth it is right. It's been a hectic ride so far, and my emotions have certainly been through the ringer a little but we'll see. Thank you for sharing your experience too. It's always comforting to know someone is going through something similar.
Virgoflirt..the 'spat'. Ok, so basically in the lead up to the actual night of the 'incident' he was sending me signals left, right and centre that he was interested. Even when someone would raise the fact that I had started seeing someone else in conversation, he would talk over them and change the subject. He just didn't want to know about it. So we went to the function but I noticed he wasn't talking to me as much. A lady from another department in our workplace showed up and his attention was focused on her, even though I knew he wasn't interested in her as it wa common knowledge she had a massive hting for him. She wasn't all over him but she was def showing her interest. Anyway, I had to leave early as I had another function to attend. I caught him staring at me so it gave me enough confidence to take the initiative. Now before I tell you what I did, please note I KNOW my mistake! I know what I did was dumb. H approached me and asked if I wanted a drink (he ws buying the next round), I said no but I'd go into the bar and help him. So he got the drinks and I told him to come back in after he finished distributing them as I needed to speak with him. He looked quite excited and I saw him coming back into the bar. I figured because there were work people everywhere I would walk off to the back of the bar so no one would see. What I didn't notice, there were work people there too. As I turned around, he had turned around and gone back outside. I was guttered. I walked back outside and he wouldn't look at me. I said goodbye to everyone holding back to tears and then left for my next party..in tears. I was just humiliated, hence why I refused to speak to him for weeks. I was also disappointed as despite him constantly sitting with me at work, talking to me, joining in all of my conversions (he's the kind of guy that if he's not interested in speaking to someone, he won't), he never apologised or explained himself. After about a month, I softened up as I realised being angry and b*tchy wouldn't get me anywhere. So slowly our relationship starte to mend and he was def reacting positively.
Virgoflirt..the 'spat'. Ok, so basically in the lead up to the actual night of the 'incident' he was sending me signals left, right and centre that he was interested. Even when someone would raise the fact that I had started seeing someone else in conversation, he would talk over them and change the subject. He just didn't want to know about it. So we went to the function but I noticed he wasn't talking to me as much. A lady from another department in our workplace showed up and his attention was focused on her, even though I knew he wasn't interested in her as it wa common knowledge she had a massive hting for him. She wasn't all over him but she was def showing her interest. Anyway, I had to leave early as I had another function to attend. I caught him staring at me so it gave me enough confidence to take the initiative. Now before I tell you what I did, please note I KNOW my mistake! I know what I did was dumb. H approached me and asked if I wanted a drink (he ws buying the next round), I said no but I'd go into the bar and help him. So he got the drinks and I told him to come back in after he finished distributing them as I needed to speak with him. He looked quite excited and I saw him coming back into the bar. I figured because there were work people everywhere I would walk off to the back of the bar so no one would see. What I didn't notice, there were work people there too. As I turned around, he had turned around and gone back outside. I was guttered. I walked back outside and he wouldn't look at me. I said goodbye to everyone holding back to tears and then left for my next party..in tears. I was just humiliated, hence why I refused to speak to him for weeks. I was also disappointed as despite him constantly sitting with me at work, talking to me, joining in all of my conversions (he's the kind of guy that if he's not interested in speaking to someone, he won't), he never apologised or explained himself. After about a month, I softened up as I realised being angry and b*tchy wouldn't get me anywhere. So slowly our relationship starte to mend and he was def reacting positively.
I just freaked out when I saw him, I know..stupid right! So after much thinking I went into work the next day with a new attitude. He made it a point to sit as close to me as he possibly could like he had done the day before (our office is Activity based working - so free seating) but instead of acknowledging me, he talked around me the whole day to other people, never to me. If I was to say something, he would talk over the top of me or just ignore me. I was quite upset but I didn't let him see it. I tried to be normal, spoke to him one on one, he would respond but only the bare minimum. I caught him eyeballing me A LOT though. I still made it a point to say bye to him when I was going home. So I guess my question being WTH is going on? Does he like me? Is he playing mind games? If so, why? Is it from my own doing. I know what I've got to do from here on, but I like the guy so much, I'm not sure why he has such a weird effect on me. Thank you for reading!
Hello! So long story short, nearly two years ago I began to develop a crush on a (Virgo) manager at work (he doesn't have direct reports, he is more of a specialist, but saying that, I am his subordinate). The crush was very innocent for the first 8 or so months, he was an acquaintance and someone who I would admire from afar. I respected that he lived with his girlfriend and was in a serious relationship (as was I at the time). Then just over a year ago, we were at work drinks and it was like a switch, the intensity between the two of us all of a sudden increased. As corny as this may sound, it was like we were magnets drawn to each other. After that night, I would always find him close to me, going out of his way to be near me, talk to me, he would remember every little thing I would say, I'd catch him staring at me, etc. It wasn't over the top where (many) people would notice nor was it sleazy but the sexual tension and nervous energy was definitely apparent. He was also becoming shyer than usual around me. As a result, I found myself becoming quite anxious around him and I would end up avoiding him and even sometimes ignoring him. I'm a very confident person (Aries) but something about this man made me feel so insecure. I realise it wasn't anything he was doing on purpose but I just couldn't be normal around him anymore. Approx 6-7 months ago, he and his girlfriend break up. I'm single at this point too and we start to get closer, flirting a lot more but I am STILL being a p*ssy and not being able to relax around him. I was most definitely making things awkward. I forgot to include that just before he and hi gf broke up, I told him of my attraction for him and that was the reason why I act so strange. I wrote that to him through text but he never responded. A week later, they're spilt up and he is def making it a point to be closer to me. There are a lot more details I could include but the shortest version is end of September last year, something happened. I wouldn't call it a fight but was it was a misunderstanding which made me very angry at him. I didn't speak to him for weeks and it was very evident I was p*ssed. He kept trying to be close to me but I wouldn't have it. I ended up getting over it and softened up and before I went on xmas break, I gave him a xmas card saying I wanted to start fresh for 2013. I saw him for the first time last week and I did the idiot thing where I closed up and didn't even say hi properly.
He is the quintessential Virgo and I am an absolute typical Aries. We seem to mesh pretty well but I just don't want to be too forward with him and scare him away.
Thanks in advance
Thanks in advance
"What has happened these days?
It seems that young women are so misguided about men. To give him the goods doesn't lead to a relationship and for some reason she is in error in believing that it does.
Why does she believe this? Where is this coming from?
Is it coming from being raised with an absent father, and so sees their mother enhancing their sex appeal to gain attention from males? Whereas when we were children, we witnessed our parents respectably relating and working together?
First of all...I did not sleep with him in hoping it would lead to anything. The first time we did it I was less than a week out of a 5 year relationship where I was engaged. I was messed up in the head, lonely and it seemed like a good idea at the time as I was in semi high spirits as I'd had a fabulous night at the work Xmas party as well as thinking he was super cute, I always had. The opportunity presented itself so I figured why not. I NEVER in a million years would have thought it would lead to how I'm feeling now.
Second of all...no absent father. I do and always have had excellent role models as parents. God forbid, I like sex and I decided to go home with a hot guy on the rebound. It's not like I sleep around in hoping for a marriage proposal.
Anyway, I know that I have to figure out what it is that I actually want out of this guy. I have toyed with the idea that maybe my feelings are just a result of the great sex we have together. I haven't 'seen' him in three weeks but I have run into him at the elevators at work a couple of times and we were texting on the weekend. I'll be thinking that the longer I leave it, then the more I'll get over it but the more time passes, the more I want to see him again. It's like I'm addicted to him. I really want to ask him next time where I stand with him as we've never had this 'discussion'. From listening to other peoples' experiences and stories, "Friends with Benefits" don't usually spoon, cuddle, spend the night and hang around in the morning chatting. I've also heard that there is usually that talk of clarifying what the relationship is before it begins so as to prevent this exact situation from happening. I'm so new at this as I have been in a long term relationship since my early 20s. I need some guidance. If I do ask him, what do I say and how should I say it? I'm not the most tactful person in the world and I don't want to screw anything up.
It seems that young women are so misguided about men. To give him the goods doesn't lead to a relationship and for some reason she is in error in believing that it does.
Why does she believe this? Where is this coming from?
Is it coming from being raised with an absent father, and so sees their mother enhancing their sex appeal to gain attention from males? Whereas when we were children, we witnessed our parents respectably relating and working together?
First of all...I did not sleep with him in hoping it would lead to anything. The first time we did it I was less than a week out of a 5 year relationship where I was engaged. I was messed up in the head, lonely and it seemed like a good idea at the time as I was in semi high spirits as I'd had a fabulous night at the work Xmas party as well as thinking he was super cute, I always had. The opportunity presented itself so I figured why not. I NEVER in a million years would have thought it would lead to how I'm feeling now.
Second of all...no absent father. I do and always have had excellent role models as parents. God forbid, I like sex and I decided to go home with a hot guy on the rebound. It's not like I sleep around in hoping for a marriage proposal.
Anyway, I know that I have to figure out what it is that I actually want out of this guy. I have toyed with the idea that maybe my feelings are just a result of the great sex we have together. I haven't 'seen' him in three weeks but I have run into him at the elevators at work a couple of times and we were texting on the weekend. I'll be thinking that the longer I leave it, then the more I'll get over it but the more time passes, the more I want to see him again. It's like I'm addicted to him. I really want to ask him next time where I stand with him as we've never had this 'discussion'. From listening to other peoples' experiences and stories, "Friends with Benefits" don't usually spoon, cuddle, spend the night and hang around in the morning chatting. I've also heard that there is usually that talk of clarifying what the relationship is before it begins so as to prevent this exact situation from happening. I'm so new at this as I have been in a long term relationship since my early 20s. I need some guidance. If I do ask him, what do I say and how should I say it? I'm not the most tactful person in the world and I don't want to screw anything up.
I'm on my phone so cannot write an extended reply. He's not married, no way. He's a young guy. As far as I'm aware, there is no woman in his life. I'm not that stupid. I know he's def not married as I've been to his place a number of times. But I see it now, married or not, he's buttering me up to keep getting what he wants. Sucks in a way but it is what it is I guess, damn. Still unsure whether to ask him what the terms are or to just leave it altogether?? Thank you for your responses
Hello! I have a question, won't bore you with details but basically I've been 'seeing' a Virgo man - (29th August) since Christmas. We get on very well when we're together, we make each other laugh but it's never gone anywhere further than just hooking up and having $ ex. When we are together, it's not just wham bam, we lay and talk, fall asleep holding each other. He's even asked on occassion if I'd like to get coffee or breakfast with him in the morning. Even at a social work function back in February, he displayed some interest and we stayed back after everyone had left and had a chat and a laugh He's a typical Virgo in pretty much every sense, very critical and sarcastic and also quite introverted. A couple of mnoths ago, I thought I'd take initiative and texted him mid week asking him how his Easter dinner was with family and said hope he was having a great week. He did not text back until 24 hours later, it was nice but very to the point and no questions back. I took that as a bit of a shut down. We've met up a few times since then, the most recent being on the weekend. Again, we got on very well and as always the $ ex was amazing! I'm a little confused as he does seem to really enjoy my company and seems to genuinely like me but I'm not sure how to take this anymore as my feelings for him are growing and I don't know whether to take it to the next level or confront him with how I'm feeling. I've never, ever indicated of my feelings and for all he knows, I could be in it for fun but my opinion is he would actually invest in some proper time with me (taking me out to dinner, show, etc) rather than just random hook ups once in a while.
He even seems to me very comfortable around me, at the beginning he was somewhat shy but now he's opened up and sincerely seems like he can feel he can be himself, perhaps not 100% but I can definetely sense him loosening up.
Some key pointers are: I'm an Aries (23rd March) and I'm 3.5 years older than me. We also work in the same organisation but in completely two different departments. It is rare for the two of us to actually ever see each other, occassionally waiting for the lift.
Any assistance would be greatly appreciated.
He even seems to me very comfortable around me, at the beginning he was somewhat shy but now he's opened up and sincerely seems like he can feel he can be himself, perhaps not 100% but I can definetely sense him loosening up.
Some key pointers are: I'm an Aries (23rd March) and I'm 3.5 years older than me. We also work in the same organisation but in completely two different departments. It is rare for the two of us to actually ever see each other, occassionally waiting for the lift.
Any assistance would be greatly appreciated.
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Virgo
Hello! I have a question, won't bore you with details but basically I've been 'seeing' a Virgo man - (29th August) sinc
@Ebonyjade
Joined: Jun 20, 2011 · Topics: 2 · Posts: 8
Virgo
Hello! So long story short, nearly two years ago I began to develop a crush on a (Virgo) manager at work (he doesn't ha
@Ebonyjade
Joined: Jun 20, 2011 · Topics: 2 · Posts: 8