littlefish123 joined March 05, 2020
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silent treatment, whole day everyday - that pretty much sums up my cancer ex 
I went through a lot of dark times, believe me
I went through a lot of dark times, believe meno infidelity, I just had some long term self-esteem issues (that I am currently working on) and was constantly being jealous of his girl friends - I did not trust him. and the biggest issue for him was that I constantly was bitching about everything. his friends, him being messy in our household, everything you can think of. this was basically why he gave me silent treatment everytime, as he was exhausted from fighting with me - I am more the type of person who is verbal
He even told me that after I moved out he had bad dreams about me at night, that I was bitching
Last time in DEC 2019 we agreed that I will move out for a while and we will be dating each other like in the beginning - but I didn't do so - I know, my bad. He told me that I broke my promise and our agreement and he doesn't want to be with me anymore as he cannot trust me
He even told me that after I moved out he had bad dreams about me at night, that I was bitching
Last time in DEC 2019 we agreed that I will move out for a while and we will be dating each other like in the beginning - but I didn't do so - I know, my bad. He told me that I broke my promise and our agreement and he doesn't want to be with me anymore as he cannot trust me
Hi everyone,
so long story short - we've been with my cancer ex boyfriend for 2,5 years - relationship had it's great times, but it was also very rocky (as per his moodiness and silent treatments all the time and my aquarius/pisces split personality ).
When I finally moved out from his apartment a month ago we had a big row, but in the end we hugged each other and promised to get in touch after a month.
So, my birthday was on 19/2 and I have received a birthday message from him, which I didn't expect at all. He also suggested to meet in a week - so in the end we met basically after 3 weeks of no contact, which was last Wednesday.
The meeting went well from the very beginning, we had dinner together, talked about some mutual friends, about our families and basically stuff that I would talk about with any other male friends of mine.
As the evening went on, I still did not sense any further feelings between us, so I asked him - so what about us?
And he went silent. He was looking at me, seemed really nervous (also smoked bunch of cigarettes even when he was a non-smoker before and he really disliked this habit of mine). I asked him to be straight forward and tell me what he is feeling. His response was - what would you like to hear. I told him - the truth.
He started to tell me about his previous relationship (which ended in 2015) and basically started to compare me with his ex girlfriend. How natural it was with her, how he fell in love with her more and more during their relationship. This hit me really hard. Than he basically told me that with me it was different than with her. That with my complicated personality, I was distancing myself from him and he lost feelings a long time ago..But in our relationship when the times were good, he was very caring and he was doing everything for me (even when I did not ask for it).Basically I felt that I was his priority. But now when I heard him saying that he basically never loved me, I started to question this whole relationship. Once he even told me he was considering marrying me, but than he changed his mind after I hurt him couple of times.
He still wants to remain in contact, catch up from time to time. He told me there is no chance in ever getting back together as he does not trust me and he thinks the relationship would be the same.
Do you guys think there is any chance for me to be with him in a relationship again? (He also told me he needs to clear his head now and it will take him at least 6 months). This wasn't my first relationship ( I am 30 now), but I never felt so strong about someone before - not even in my previous relationship that lasted for 5 years. I thought that we will overcome all our issues, I started to work on myself and visit therapy (as I am perfectly aware of my own issues). I thought that we would marry some day and have kids - we also planned this before.
Should I still wait for him or let him go forever?
I am confused and really don't know what to do. Previously I didn't have problem with forgetting a relationship after some time, but now I'm stuck
so long story short - we've been with my cancer ex boyfriend for 2,5 years - relationship had it's great times, but it was also very rocky (as per his moodiness and silent treatments all the time and my aquarius/pisces split personality
). When I finally moved out from his apartment a month ago we had a big row, but in the end we hugged each other and promised to get in touch after a month.
So, my birthday was on 19/2 and I have received a birthday message from him, which I didn't expect at all. He also suggested to meet in a week - so in the end we met basically after 3 weeks of no contact, which was last Wednesday.
The meeting went well from the very beginning, we had dinner together, talked about some mutual friends, about our families and basically stuff that I would talk about with any other male friends of mine.
As the evening went on, I still did not sense any further feelings between us, so I asked him - so what about us?
And he went silent. He was looking at me, seemed really nervous (also smoked bunch of cigarettes even when he was a non-smoker before and he really disliked this habit of mine). I asked him to be straight forward and tell me what he is feeling. His response was - what would you like to hear. I told him - the truth.
He started to tell me about his previous relationship (which ended in 2015) and basically started to compare me with his ex girlfriend. How natural it was with her, how he fell in love with her more and more during their relationship. This hit me really hard. Than he basically told me that with me it was different than with her. That with my complicated personality, I was distancing myself from him and he lost feelings a long time ago..But in our relationship when the times were good, he was very caring and he was doing everything for me (even when I did not ask for it).Basically I felt that I was his priority. But now when I heard him saying that he basically never loved me, I started to question this whole relationship. Once he even told me he was considering marrying me, but than he changed his mind after I hurt him couple of times.
He still wants to remain in contact, catch up from time to time. He told me there is no chance in ever getting back together as he does not trust me and he thinks the relationship would be the same.
Do you guys think there is any chance for me to be with him in a relationship again? (He also told me he needs to clear his head now and it will take him at least 6 months). This wasn't my first relationship ( I am 30 now), but I never felt so strong about someone before - not even in my previous relationship that lasted for 5 years. I thought that we will overcome all our issues, I started to work on myself and visit therapy (as I am perfectly aware of my own issues). I thought that we would marry some day and have kids - we also planned this before.
Should I still wait for him or let him go forever?
I am confused and really don't know what to do. Previously I didn't have problem with forgetting a relationship after some time, but now I'm stuck
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Cancer
Hi everyone,
so long story short - we've been with my cancer ex boyfriend for 2,5 years - relationship had it's great times, but it was also very rocky (as per his moodiness and silent treatments all the time and my aquarius/pisces split personality :D ).
@littlefish123
Joined: Mar 05, 2020 · Topics: 1 · Posts: 3