Gave the Aries a piece of my mind on our situation (Page 2)

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Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
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Posted by bittercupcake
Posted by tiziani
Posted by bittercupcake
Confronting him and then lying about your emotional involvement.

"There's something going on between you and your boss right?.... I'm really happy for you."




Lol It gets worse each time you read it.

OP one day you'll hopefully look back on this and laugh at your texts as what not to do.
I know I’m being harsh on the OP, but she needed to see her own writing objectively. Hopefully she will have and truly move on.
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I actually loved everything you wrote. It made sense and had a BIG dose of reality that was refreshing. I love reading logical answers. Things can be very cloudy when people say stuff with emotions. Reading a different perspective was great. I enjoyed the break down.

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Sheever
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Posted by bittercupcake
Posted by Sheever
Posted by bittercupcake
Posted by Sheever
Posted by bittercupcake
Lol at all the asinine comments on fighting for your territory and man! Aries don’t like that shit. Especially Aries males. They hate drama. They actually enjoy a woman who’s willing to walk away and not put up with their crap because it gives them something to do... like chasing which they love. If you come to them, that’s too easy and boring. Hence why he probably isn’t really interested in the OP, she’s too square for the adventurous Aries and too restricitive and demanding, and they’re not even officially together!

Don’t play games with an Aries, they hate that shit and despite their simplicity, can read through your bullshit. They won’t say it to your face - but they’ll surely laugh behind your back. Annoy them enough and they’ll blow up and humiliate you.

Do NOT toy with an Aries.
Haha, so true!
I unfortunately know a little too well the Aries man. My ex and I used to have these conversations all the time, how he'd just sweet talk a woman because he was bored or just to have fun. He'd keep them on a leash because he had nothing better to do and they were too easy and attainable for him. That was always something he said, "I can have any girl I want. All you have to do is be an asshole and sweet talk them and they'll still be there... and it's not what I want". Luckily I never put up with his sht so he behaves without me asking too.


Not all of us like that. There are many decent one doesn't even want to look at other females as you got everything he wants. One thing for sure. Aries likes when you make efforts. If they see you make efforts, they make twice as much. Take care of him, will treat you as queen.


Yeah that’s what I said. As long as you’re the one for an Aries, (whole package) then he wouldn’t stray or entertain other women. But that’s not the case with the OP. He’s stepping all over her and it’s most likely because he’s not as into her.
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Yes, that's how aries works.the question if one can make sure she will be the one for the aries because aries can make efforts. What she does is free of choice always and aries corresponding to it always.
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Sheever
@Sheever
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Posted by bittercupcake
Posted by sakuraflowers
Posted by bittercupcake

Toying as in playing little passive aggressive games... Let me break it don't for ya:

Guilt tripping him by telling him how he chose her over you.

" I don't act the way I act with you with just about anyone. The sex and almost living together. Making long term plans. You need to be really fucking special for me to do that.....If that girl means a lot to you and you're working on getting her. Enough for you to make a Snapchat and getting angry and drunk over her having a man?"

Confronting him and then lying about your emotional involvement.

"There's something going on between you and your boss right?.... I'm really happy for you."

Interrogating and asserting yourself, as if you're in a committed relationship, and making passive aggressive demands.

So I asked him why he's going to the bar again then? And another text saying: "You're going to see her right?"

Lying about your independent stance and claiming your unaffected when you clearly are

So, I said this to him: "I know I sound jealous but it's not that at all.....

I hope it works out with her!"


Most importantly lying to yourself that he doesn't mean anything and that you'd walk away from this situation. When it's clear, through your own contradiction, that that's not the case.

(I asked because he stopped going out every night years ago. Only does so once every 2-3 months now. But lately? It's way more)

And if you're still in denial about your actions, then re-read what you wrote to him:

"You're a great man and she's going to be a lucky girl! But we'll just friends.

If not? I really miss you and wanna see you tonight or tomorrow"


You basically said, 'it's ok. you can be with her if you want (even though it's not what I want)... but if you don't want to? (which is my way of fishing to see if I matter to you), then I want you to take into consideration that I'm still here pinning for you and will wait as long as it takes for you to get your shit together.' ---> classic doormat behavior 101


Sounds more like a Cap's (or earth sign's) defense mechanism. Seems more like she's saying that if the other girl is in the picture, she will walk away, even though she really don't want to. The Aries probably knows that about her and hence responded accordingly (that yes he wants her and that yes there's a future between them - all of which is a green light to a Cap to stay). Whether he means what he says or purposely saying that to keep her around, is another story.
I get that, but if she were truly independent as she claims, she wouldn’t even give him the option to stay. Tell me if you’d do the same? You know the man you are dating is going out continuously with another woman and trying to get her attention. He doesn’t hide the fact and he’s reverting back to his old ways / addictions. Would YOU still ask where you stand? The most dignified and independent way of doing things would be to walk away without his approval or permission. That’s the issue here...clinging on to someone who is displaying disrespectful behavior.

I think the OP is invested here, and I think it has to do more with the fact that she wasted her time on him and feels like she should be compensated. But there are times where you need to realize it’s not going anywhere and cut your losses. Invested your time and love on someone who will return the favor.
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Good analysis. 🙂
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Sheever
@Sheever
8 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 17 · Posts: 1181 · Topics: 11
Posted by bittercupcake
Posted by Sheever
Posted by bittercupcake
Posted by Sheever
Posted by bittercupcake
Posted by Sheever
Posted by bittercupcake
Lol at all the asinine comments on fighting for your territory and man! Aries don’t like that shit. Especially Aries males. They hate drama. They actually enjoy a woman who’s willing to walk away and not put up with their crap because it gives them something to do... like chasing which they love. If you come to them, that’s too easy and boring. Hence why he probably isn’t really interested in the OP, she’s too square for the adventurous Aries and too restricitive and demanding, and they’re not even officially together!

Don’t play games with an Aries, they hate that shit and despite their simplicity, can read through your bullshit. They won’t say it to your face - but they’ll surely laugh behind your back. Annoy them enough and they’ll blow up and humiliate you.

Do NOT toy with an Aries.
Haha, so true!
I unfortunately know a little too well the Aries man. My ex and I used to have these conversations all the time, how he'd just sweet talk a woman because he was bored or just to have fun. He'd keep them on a leash because he had nothing better to do and they were too easy and attainable for him. That was always something he said, "I can have any girl I want. All you have to do is be an asshole and sweet talk them and they'll still be there... and it's not what I want". Luckily I never put up with his sht so he behaves without me asking too.


Not all of us like that. There are many decent one doesn't even want to look at other females as you got everything he wants. One thing for sure. Aries likes when you make efforts. If they see you make efforts, they make twice as much. Take care of him, will treat you as queen.


Yeah that’s what I said. As long as you’re the one for an Aries, (whole package) then he wouldn’t stray or entertain other women. But that’s not the case with the OP. He’s stepping all over her and it’s most likely because he’s not as into her.
Yes, that's how aries works.the question if one can make sure she will be the one for the aries because aries can make efforts. What she does is free of choice always and aries corresponding to it always.


Yup. I’d never tolerate an Aries bull crap, which is something they need (like Aquas) I think that’s why they make a good coupling.

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The point is not about tolerate, but actually being so blind to let the situation go so far... , since aries always let you know first what's up. When someone doesn't listen for few times, they can't be bothered to explain over and over again, and start slowly drifting away as it means you don't care.. .it may sound harsh, but its Your fault not theirs.

The good analysis meant to be a compliment of your deep understanding over the situation itself 🙂

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DMV
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15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

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Posted by bittercupcake
Posted by sakuraflowers
Posted by bittercupcake
I get that, but if she were truly independent as she claims, she wouldn’t even give him the option to stay. Tell me if you’d do the same? You know the man you are dating is going out continuously with another woman and trying to get her attention. He doesn’t hide the fact and he’s reverting back to his old ways / addictions. Would YOU still ask where you stand? The most dignified and independent way of doing things would be to walk away without his approval or permission. That’s the issue here...clinging on to someone who is displaying disrespectful behavior.

I think the OP is invested here, and I think it has to do more with the fact that she wasted her time on him and feels like she should be compensated. But there are times where you need to realize it’s not going anywhere and cut your losses. Invested your time and love on someone who will return the favor.

She's invested, that's for certain. It doesn't mean she would stay if she thinks there is no future between them. That's the question she was asking: Is there a future between them? If the other girl remains in the picture, then she will let them be a happy couple, aka leave. A Cap would stay with someone if they think there is a future with that person, even if there really isn't. But the reverse is true. If a Cap thinks there isn't a future with someone (when there really is), they will move on. I know of a story that was on the Cap board where a Cap had feelings for a Virgo for 6 years and the Virgo had feelings for the Cap too but would remain distant because the Virgo didn't believe the Cap had feelings for them. By the time the Virgo had realized that it was true, the Cap moved on, despite mutual feelings were present.

The problem here though, is that I think the Aries realizes this about her. He knows how to answer to get her to stay. The fact that she had ask where she stands is a bad sign, that probably indicates that he's really just keeping her around, while pursuing the other girl, imo.
maybe true. But why act like a doormat by asking if he’s not trying to be with her, to see her after? Sorry but no matter how much you cry independence, expecting a verbal answer from a man whose purposely trying to get at another is reason enough. She wouldn’t leave. It would take her a while before she does. Capricorn women/energy would wait it out a while before they make the decision to leave. Hence the Capricorn who waited 6 years. My niece is also the same. In a miserable relationship with another cap and no signs of leaving him anytime soon until she becomes a lawyer, which is another 4-6 years.

If the OP wants to stick around for a couple years to wait it out, when the answer is clear that he’s not as interested in her, then that’s her choice. She asked for opinions and we gave ours. If she’s in denial about the situation, then that’s her problem.
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As a Venus in Capricorn, I get it.

Wasted effort.