Hi guys,
As you can tell by my name, I am triple Aries and I've recently met my first Cancer.
We were on a plane together coming back from Thailand. He lives in Spain, I'm in Italy. There is a significant age difference. (He's younger).
He was sitting next to me and within 3 minutes of sitting down he was talking to me. I rarely talk to people on planes but he got me the second I saw him. By the time the plane took off we were deep in conversation.
Basically we talked the whole flight. As we get near landing he kisses me. Then he asks me if I would be willing to visit him in Spain and if I had a problem with the age difference. I said of course I'd come to Spain and no the age wasn't an issue for me.
We kissed again and were holding hands in the terminal. He had to leave for his connecting flight and me for mine. We connected on Insta (these millenials!) and I sent him an empty email so he would have my address.
The day he got back he wrote me how amazing it was to meet me and nothing else. I responded that I would never forget that airport ever again and he wrote back "me neither". But there was no additional conversation or talk about seeing each other again. He's quick to like every picture I post on Instagram but since we got back we haven't spoken again. I know he was with his family and friends for a few days, rounding out his vacation, and was partying pretty hard. I think today is his first day back in the office and at his home.
Do I wait for him to reach out? Should I send him a mail? I know Cancers sometimes pull away to see if you like them, and given the age difference he might be concerned that I thought the whole thing was a funny plane story and that's it. But he didn't seem shy about taking the lead before so I don't want to come on too strong.
Any advice or ideas is welcome!!
Thanks
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Jun 27, 2016Comments: 975 · Posts: 5791 · Topics: 44
Kissing someone sooo soon and randomly like that makes me think he was only attracted to you physically. Also think that because he hasn’t messaged you. Cancers love to talk to the ones they really like. They don’t care about who talks first. I’m pretty sure it was just a “fling”.
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Nov 10, 2010Comments: 287 · Posts: 30828 · Topics: 650
You brought up the age difference twice. What is it?
Message him with open ended question. Cancers do love to talk but sometimes a small nudge might help. Risk it.
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Jun 14, 2017Comments: 1119 · Posts: 10883 · Topics: 28
Reach out 😊 You don’t have anything to lose
maybe I should just flat out ask him if he wants to keep in touch. the only thing it will hurt is my ego. I mean if he's not interested I just lose something that was never mine anyway.
I’m sure he was! No doubt. But realistically, probably knows it wouldn’t work out. And he may have a gf or like someone else from his hometown.
:-) No I doubt that there's any chance for a serious long term relationship to happen - though one never knows. I know he doesn't have a girlfriend. We went over his whole history. Said he was so picky about women.
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Nov 10, 2010Comments: 287 · Posts: 30828 · Topics: 650
28 is a good age. He could be more mature than you know.
28/29 is a life changing time for people. Saturn Return etc.
I met my sag lover when I was 28 or so and he is 7 years older than me.
He is what I needed at the time.
You may be whay he needs.
But you never know till you shoot your shot
Well if it's just for sex go chase him. If he's interested it shouldn't be that hard....right? Just sex.
You would think, but men these days leave me frequently speechless. It’s like they feel used or something if you tell them you’re ok with just sex.
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Aug 21, 2016Comments: 0 · Posts: 328 · Topics: 12
Back in June I also met a Cancer while on holidays. He too is younger, even though not so young.
We met at a diving club and he was one of my diving buddies.
I immediately found him gorgeous but when I heard his age I put the idea aside. But we had a great time and ended up kissing.
To me it was all a vacation fling.
But once we returned to our home countries he did the chase.
We spoke every single day since we met, 6-7 months ago. And we still do.
He made all the arrangements for us to meet, sent me flowers to work, surprised me at the airport with flowers, showers me with attention.
I think the difference between your story and mine is that I never took this very seriously. I even considered stop it a few times because I was not comfortable with him being younger.
But I have to tell you that a few weeks after we met, even though we were speaking everyday, I told him straight away that I didnt give anyone else that sort of attention. That if I was using my time speaking to him everyday he would better move his ass and visit me (we live 3 hours away). I hinted he was being all talk and no action! He immediately arranged to meet me 😀
I struggled a bit in the first months but now I feel fully ready to accept his love! We are planning to move in together.
My mum is going through some seriously health issues and he is showing to be a great MAN. We came to see my parents twice already and he even takes care of my mum while she is sick..helping her eat, etc
So anyway, what I wanted to say is that even though Im living a beautiful love story now (After a big fail with a Sag), in the beggining I told him to walk the talk or I would be out. Long story short, tell him you enjoyed meeting him and the kiss, but now you wanna see some actions, otherwise you move on.
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Jul 28, 2016Comments: 4222 · Posts: 6474 · Topics: 83
LOL. The charm of the Spanish man... trying to get with a woman.
I have so many Spanish friends I have learned to steer clear of them romantically
However, if op is 42, she's too damn old to be in limerence over an airplane kiss.
She sold herself to the millennia devils by creating an Instagram account because of some stranger on a plane.
Incorrect reporting of the information I provided, but since you've touched on the question of what one should and shouldn't be doing at their age (which is a bit like generalizing millennials) over the age of 35 your levels of oxytocin increase, making it increasingly more difficult to distinguish between love and one night stands. Feel free to Google it. :-)
Just wanted to say a quick thank you to all of the people who tried to genuinely offer their assistance.
I forgot how quickly these message boards degenerate into trashcans for people's pent up aggression.
Be well!
honey, I'm not trying to fight with you. I never said this was love.
have a beautiful day.
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Mar 30, 2017Comments: 6947 · Posts: 3921 · Topics: 152
I think this is a really good story.
Sorry for the drama on this thread, I don't know why people acting so offended..
Don't be scared to just push on him one time, but then remember to keep it cool. Sinces he's younger, be light.. You are Gemini Mars, that's probably natural to you. As a cancer, I know how needy behavior repulses us. We might actually get startled from the aggression.. And then you are blocked. We do things when we are perfectly good and ready.. Not before and not a minute late. Strict on how we take action.
But he sounds cool, like a man worth getting to know. I don't blame you and I don't see why not talk to him just because he's younger. He's legal, and a sexually active adult just like you and that's what matters.. He's not a little ass boy.. I don't know what all that trippin came from. 42 isn't that old, you probably look damn good for your age and I woulda kissed you too if who you are aroused me during that plane flight.
Cancers can like older women, and that's not even hard to believe. We like motherly women and we like them wise.. I'm a Cancer sun with Venus in the 10th. I actually PREFER women to have an age or two on me... But the again, I see myself settling with a younger girl because I'm easy to look up to and attachable.. I probably couldn't shake a younger woman.. I actually always broke up with a younger girl.
But all that talk about him being ugly and that's why he's going after you is some nonsense... I always found that men who were perceived as physically unattractive tend to go for little girls, women that are barely women (17-20), or are just pedophilic to some degree, or date the mentally challenged.. Because it's all about manipulation and control.. It's just easy for a young girl to fall in, regardless of looks, especially if they got money.
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Mar 30, 2017Comments: 6947 · Posts: 3921 · Topics: 152
Old ass men don't want women their age and sometimes a woman might try a man younger...
I hang around too many men not to know these things. Everytime I look up, some old guy talking about "I want some young pussy.. How the fuck is we both in the bed old and wrinkly as shit, I can't do nothing with that.. 21 is just fine, but shit, gimme 18-19).
And those are kind of the exact words I heard from a guy in his 50's ..
They also got strategy on how to game younger women as a man in your late 30's and 40's.
Don't nobody talk much shit when it's a older man wanting a younger women.. That's just the way it goes huh?
Emhendo - He's not ugly and neither am I. If I didn't tell you I was 42 you would never know. I think the confusion (and inexplicable aggression) came from the fact that people thought I was trying to turn this into a relationship. My bad for non explicitly stating that.
In its finest expression, to me, it could have been a couple of weekends here and there of food, wine, fun and sex. My experience with Cancers has only been female and I know that they hate being the one to call, but they also hate when people intrude on them, and they pull back it's always a test to see if the other person is actually interested. So I didn't want to scare him off....from an affair.
But yeah, I hear you on the men. I have two targets younger boys looking for experience & mommy and older older men who need a trophy. I've already had the pleasure of a marriage & divorce, and am setting up a company, so I'm not looking to get into anything serious. Between the boys and the older older men, I'll take the boys.
Arielle says:
So what do u think you're feeling? Limerence or love?
I've dated 28 yr olds and I feel it's just for fun.
Totally not on the same level long term.
Honestly, neither. If he calls me or doesn't call me, not one piece of my life will change.
But, I do like sex. I'm not dating. And a fling with a really cute 28 year old sounds like it could be fun.
Unless he turns out to be enlightened, which I did think he was mature for his age - but not mature - there is no chance that any interaction between us would go past a couple of weekends of fun. I am very clear on this.
I do think that age is difficult, though. I dated a director who was 32 years old and he was about 20 years older than me across the board. But that's not the case with this guy.
Either way, I've kind of already lost interest...like a good Aries.