In Love with my Libra Best-Friend (Page 3)

Chatz.. see you think like me!! We could be dangerous together if we hung out!

Nicodemus is quite interesting.. eh!

oh nic is doing really well.....ok well I like being dangerous so how about you get YOUR butt over here and we can party—? *smiles sweetly*.....pity huh? 😢

Me married? No poor soul deserves such a thing. I like the drunk side of miss aqua, it's only fun when it's dangerous 😉 Ok, ill be real, I like the drunk side of most girls (shifty eyes)

I agree with intelligent fun, I need someone I am comfortable enough around to uncage my wit and cynical sense of humor. It is hard keeping yourself wondering if people realize your joking or not.

Well we realize it and love it! You're really funny and witty! So what else ya got for us.. I have not had a chance to check all the other threads.. I will get back with you all in a minute..

Chatz.. girl what is that like a 24 hour flight, at least. ya talking major time.. awww.. what's a girl to do?? 😢

for 24 hours you can stay drunk!!! easy fix....I have a solution for EVERYTHING - you will learn this about me in time LOL

nic....oh come on, now don't go putting yourself down like that, Im sure you're a great catch but we're glad you're not married or you'd be all boring and not come here and amuse us *smiles* and yeah I think you guys do like the girls a bit drunk - noticed that.....scarey though coz mine at least likes to drink a LOT. Wonder if thats the way he copes with being around me LOL....mind you he LOVES it when I flirt with him after a few drinks - all those inhibitions and all.

Now Brat...come on jump on that plane...order some booze and enjoy the flight...I can pick you up - promise I drive very well hehehehe....you'll be here in time for NYE 🙂

Chatz,

I did compliment her, it was actually through her that I realized I didn't compliment the ones I was with enough in the past. One of the great things about her was that instead of being suspicious about my over-generous pillow talk like most girls, she understood that the sincerity came from my desire to woo her, and not the words I was using. We saw through each other quite well.

sound like a pretty good r/ship

It was, it would take ten pages to articulate it and it would still come across as mysterious. We believe that we are soul mates, and in that decided to let each other go and accomplish what we need for ourselves. Strength in this life, happiness in the next type of thing.

If there is anything that existed in that relationship that I wish to have in whomever I settle down with, it would be the lack of posessiveness and the chemistry that made us drunk with passion. The intimacy aspect was completely on another dimension.

Okay.. did I miss something?? Let me go back and read what transpired since I have been gone.. had to answer you all's other messages.. good stuff out there, go check it out after we finish here..

Nicodemus..."instead of being suspicious about my over-generous pillow talk like most girls, she understood that the sincerity came from my desire to woo her, and not the words I was using"

Okay... see this is what I am talking about.. who says.. over-generous pillow talk?? And uses phrases like, MY DESIRE TO WOO HER?? Love it..

This is why we are in trouble here.. stuff like that.. Sorry but it's true.. Your mind is so uncoventional, and your logic is so mysterious to even the most intellectual of signs.. why?

Nicodemus.."If there is anything that existed in that relationship that I wish to have in whomever I settle down with, it would be the lack of posessiveness and the chemistry that made us drunk with passion. The intimacy aspect was completely on another dimension."

Why would you let that go? It seemed to be so perfect? We are looking to keep or obtain a libra because we know his potential to make US drunk with passion and it is driving us mad... this is what every woman wants and needs in her life, regardless of signs/wonders/mystery.

*looks on but shuts up*

Chatz?? Agreed?? Or am I in left field?

I agree - thought I'd let you two go for it though....you're doing really well 🙂

"Why would you let that go? It seemed to be so perfect?"

Because we both had to and we knew it. Regardless of how we feel for each other there are things in her life she NEEDS to accomplish or she won't be happy. We could make time for each other and put other things off but it would only make us resent each other in the end. If you love it, let it go. And I did. That doesn't apply everywhere so don't get freaked out, it was just an understanding that existed between us and only us.

"Your mind is so uncoventional, and your logic is so mysterious to even the most intellectual of signs.. why?"

I and I assume we all, are unconventional in mind becuase I feel, think and believe that everyone deserves a trip beyond the walls of convention. I feel it necessary to blend in to society but at the same time can't help feeling that pushing the bounds of convention is enlighening to us, and stimulating to the ones we are with. Our logic is mysterious because it is illogical. Our minds play with logic like a kid plays with putty, twisting, turning, morphing it into something it wasn't yet still resembles truth. Logic is only as important to us as required to understand it, and we only need to understand it enough to manipulate it. All of us Libras get stuck here, we know that "reason" is the most powerful thing in the world we live in, powerful enough to be the tool to bend logic. Thats why we are so confusing, it's not that we have trouble finding ourselves, it's that we are never done looking. And in that quest we seemingly turn a clear world into a mysterious one. This is why we can create romance when we want it, sucess where we need it, and proof where there is none. And it typically shows itself in at least one glaring area. For your guy it might be his work as a dj, or business in general, for others it is their hobby. for me, it is the worst of them all.....when in the presence of a woman.

There I go talking all over the place again.

Simply, we make things into how we want them to be, but we do it without making waves and accomplishing those two things together is what makes everyone else to confused to stand up.

Nic..Simply, we make things into how we want them to be, but we do it without making waves and accomplishing those two things together is what makes everyone else to confused to stand up.

See this is why just about every woman on this board is up pulling their hair out at night.. instead of gettin their much needed rest to deal with ya'll.. How is anyone to know what to do, if you can manipulate every situation into a good or bad one, no matter what it is... If you have a perfect woman in front of you, you say oh, but she snores or something stupid and petty, and if she is perfectly the wrong one, you say.. oh but she's been through so much.. I can spend the rest of my life trying to save her. At that point, I can not even argue, bc it is so ironious it's pointless!! (hmmm.. ironious, not sure if that is a word, sounds good though)

didn't it just? LOL.....I am totally lost right now - maybe I've now had too much to drink *shrugs*.....I'll enjoy the show regardless 🙂

"At that point, I can not even argue, bc it is so ironious it's pointless!! (hmmm.. ironious, not sure if that is a word, sounds good though)"

Your cute.

Look, it seems like the more I try and clarify the more I end up confusing. I have an INSANE idea, but here me out. get this, look at this situation outside of astrological resoning for a bit, I know, crazy, but there is more. (I was being sarcastic, please take no offense.)

You might have a good 'ol difference of fundamental needs and desires. That might be why this is so hard. Sit down and write down and think about what are all of the things that are important to YOU not what you think should be or he thinks should be important to you, but what are important to you. Once you have all of that in front of you, take a while to think objectively on weather or not from your experience with him...they match up.

You might want and need commitment and partnership, he might just want and need understanding and loyalty, those don't match because one person will come out with a negatative balance in the wants and needs bank.

There are several psychological possibilites to why you are over analyzing him, and one of those possibilities is that you know that you two would not work out but you refuse to succumb to defeat so you are trying to qauntify your emotion with astrology and other forms of reasoning. I am not saying this is the case, but make sure it isn't before you continue to drive yourself mad.

Even with all of that said, I think that you two have some stuff that needs to be worked out before all of the variables are even known. I know I think highly of sex, but honestly, you guys love each other I think the last hang up on weather or not you guys can fall IN love with each other is chemistry....if you agree I can help you with making him comfortable with that, but you have to square up to the possibility that you guys sleep with each other and remain apart.....which is probably a big part of what is subliminally keeping you guys from making any progress.

Oh, one thing I never asked you, what do you do it and where do you do it, would you be willing to give it up and do it wherever he is doing what he is doing? Don't respond with "well, why can't he?" because if he can't he can't, don't let the reasoning or lack there of distract from the fact that it is not possible. Someone has to give, or neither of you will go anywhere.

wow I have to say that was the most awesome response and dissecting of what you've been trying to get across...I am impressed so you should be Brats!!

Nicodemus..."one thing I never asked you, what do you do it and where do you do it, would you be willing to give it up and do it wherever he is doing what he is doing?"

Do you mean, where does he and I live? Please clarify..

Chatz.. I can't help BUT be impressed.. *mouth is dropped open* this dude is amazing.. I am having so much fun with this site... Who knew??

Okay enough of the fluffy stuff, back to the meat and potatoes...

Nic..."You might want and need commitment and partnership, he might just want and need understanding and loyalty, those don't match because one person will come out with a negatative balance in the wants and needs bank"

Okay so I did this mentally last night as I lay to go to sleep. And you are so right!! It's amazing, can I pay you for this session?? Okay, so when I think about what I want in a man physically and on the outside, job, church, no clubbin'.. etc. he does not match up. BUT when I think about how I want a man to make me feel inside, he is the man I want inside (dual meaning) wow I am so clever...(playin') anyway.. Seriously, he makes me feel so special everytime I see and talk to him, he holds my hand, he says he loves me on a whim, he is creative and very talented, he has a wonderful sense of humor, patient and caring, and no matter what, he is always there for me, year after year, whenever I need him, he is there. Consistancy pays off with me. So, Nic.. is that a bad thing that he is not the man of my dreams, on the outside? Also, he has told me he does not want a girl or a committed relationship right now, so I know that, but really I am not ready for anything serious yet either.. I am still working on my divorce.. but I just want to spend more time with him.. that is my main focus right now. Getting to know him on a more personal, face-to-face level.. He always says.. "if you spent every day with me for three weeks you probably would not like me", but he knows I would and he knows he would be in love with me...He would never let me go. The issue is we live far and his job demands a lot of women in his face all the time.. it is hard for me to compete being so far away.. but I must be doing okay after 6 years and he has not bored of me yet...

So, Nic.. I will probably be the one with a negative balance if I pursue him on a sexual level, as he has told me he does not want a committed relationship.. I would be committing love-suicide.. I know. I can not have casual sex with him.. I just can't do it.. it would hurt too much.

Nic... another question us libra-lovin' ladies have.. LLL
(You know you like that😉 )

What is up with Libra men stating all women have to approach them and have to make the first advance toward them for intimacy or a relationship and what is up with the "oh I'm so shy bit"... why are libra men so afraid to take the lead or at least to admit they take the lead? Is that like a reverse psychology tactic to get the chic to come towards him.. so he does not have to do any work?? See for us aqua's that just doesn't fit. We like our men to move towards us.. we can coax him.. but he has to do all the movin'. This is probably why my libra and me are stuck in a rut now, cuz he's waiting for me and I am waiting for him.. He wants me to take the lead but I will not until he asks me to.. we are both stubborn.. the only reason I won't is because he expects me to..I will if I have to.. like if he is in my face or something like that.. but I would prefer he make it clear to me how he feels then I can take over from there.. That is not hard, but he is making it out to be sooo hard to tell me how he really feels, and yes I have asked, recently.. That may have been the wrong thing to do, and I still have not gotten an answer but at least I gave him something to think about. and after 6 years he really needs to get over the shy bit and be a man. Libra's are capable of being mature men right?? I feel like I am still in high school or something. Just say.. I like you.. like that, and I will know what you mean..something so simple, takes 900 posts to understand.. I don't get it.

I know I seem angry but I am not.. you're just a really good sounding board for what I really want to say to him.. I want to strangle him actually into telling me how he feels.. actually he would probably enjoy the strangulation too much..(playin') see what happens after a small hang over!!

lol@strangulation - guess u could try that but honestly brats, I think you need to take the lead or you will stay in that place you are in now. He probably won't, in fact its probably 99% certain he won't.....maybe something to do with rejection, or you may just have to break the ice a little as I did with mine.....he likes that but once that ice is broken watch out!!! You might be pleasantly surprised and proud of yourself at the same time 🙂

I am glad you took the time to think about both of your needs and desires to see how well you match up. Now I would take it to the next level and write down your personal convictions such as character traits about yourself that are absolute in who you are and what you require from other people. Then look at his wants and desires colum and ask yourself if being with someone like him would require you to change who you are. It likely will, but if it is minimal it is still a workable relaitonship.

Also, take a what he said about being with him for a while and not liking him semi-seriously. When it comes to the psychological and romantic side of a relaitonship we are smooth as silk, but when it comes to everyday life it is a bumpy road. When compared to Aquas we tend to be a bit less disorganized and orderly in everything we do, and we don't like people trying to change that. this might drive you a bit crazy, and trying to "help" him will drive him a bit crazy. Take that into consideration.

As far as things matching up on the inside, but not the outside...the inside is the most important of the two, it is the glue that keeps people desiring each other. But if the outside traits don't match up you will have a hard time finding harmony in every day life.

Why do we like our women to be the agressor?

Well, keep in mind this is pretty much only when things are starting out. After a Libra guy is comfortable with a relationship they have no problem sneaking up behind you, picking you up and throwing you on the bed with your pants around your ankles before you realize your not still in the same room.

In the courtship part though, remember we TURN the girl into the aggressor, it is that suggestive mind control thing we already talked about. I'll answer as it relates to myself. I and I suspect the rest of us do this for two reasons. We like inspiring passion in others...we already went over that so I'll just wrap it up with saying that it is a lot more rewarding for us to drive a girl wild enough to jump on us then it is for us to jump on them.

It also releases us from any liability. think about it, by having the girl make the first big move there is no questioning how much they really wanted it, becuase the obviously wanted it bad enough to come out of their shell. This is most rewarding with girls who "always wait for the guy"...yeah...right we'll see about that. Sometimes if it is the difference between getting laid or......

....not I will make the initial move and then pull back. Teasing and creating a lot of tension until they snap and make it known they want to go all in. You know what though...ask any girl who has been with a libra. We are very agressive sexually it just never comes accross that way because we are very sensual and rarely make the first move. We bring a girl to the point where she is passionate about going all the way becuase once we get going....there are no breaks. For us to initiate and have that same mentality would be pretty overbearing. It isn't because we built you up to the breaking point and when we do get our hands on you it's almost like were doing you a favor 😉

in my firs post I mean that we are less organized....not more, sorry.

I can second that....my last text from my Libran was:..."I think I have created a monster...I feel like doctor frankenstein"...evil laff!! He's loving it but little does he know I was already evil before he met me LOL....but not to the extent I have been with him - he MAKES me take those steps and he acts all innocent and draws out more....dunno what's in that but sure makes the game fun!!

Nic, you have a way with words....I think Brats will get a lot out of what you have written....that's if she's not too busy holding her head and/or a bucket 😉

Thanks chatz, yeah I hope she didn't overdo it last night.

either that or she's gone and put all your advice to good use!!

Chatz.."Nic, you have a way with words....I think Brats will get a lot out of what you have written....that's if she's not too busy holding her head and/or a bucket"

Okay.. I was not that bad.. that the lord.. but tired to say the least..

Yes he does have a way with words huh?? Interesting.. I am up way to early or late bc I had to check you all out. You took the time to write me so I have to take the time to respond.. Luv ya!

Nic..."After a Libra guy is comfortable with a relationship they have no problem sneaking up behind you, picking you up and throwing you on the bed with your pants around your ankles before you realize your not still in the same room"

Okay.. now see.. ummmm... that comment right there, is going to get you in trouble here at DXP, cuz if that is not some visual imagery for ya.. I don't know what is..

You don't even have to write anymore on DXP, Nic.. You can just keep copying and pasting that one right there to anything any female says on this site and they will say.. "thank you very much.. I think I'll be goin'to see me a libra RIGHT NOW" regardless of what just went down between them or what issue they are having with their libra.. Friend or not friends, broke up, fighting.. Yup, that is the answer to all those issues.. that comment right there!!!!!!!! That will clear it up for ANYBODY.. You may want to go to the other boards and post that mug too.. Get some other signs involved.. you will have a lot more interest on the libra board after that!!!!!!!

Thanks. *aqua is now officially speachless* and not at all tired.. WOW! Mind is running rampid.. I know you wrote more but I will have to comment later!

900 posts and still not able to understand?? spend 900 days and still he will remain a puzzle. Thats what we want ourselfs to be. We are way simple infact. But normal people then find us complicated. Then we have to complicate ourselfs so that others find us as simple.

We are naive - u cannot force us to be something else
we are shy - u cannot change that part also
we dont make the fist move - there also there is no way u can change us
we always have our options open - you cannot force us to make a plan with all options closed.

These are static values in various degrees. Its impossible to expect a libra to be different than this. You find someone different, they he wont be a libra. So easiest way is to to learn how to tackle it - like by closing the door without him noticing before u attack him. 😉

Chatz...Okay.. I was not that bad.. THANK the lord.. but tired to say the least.. (hang over issues)

..."After a Libra guy is comfortable with a relationship they have no problem sneaking up behind you, picking you up and throwing you on the bed with your pants around your ankles before you realize your not still in the same room"

Uh huh - gotta admit....I read that over and over - man!!!!!!

Chatz... gotta luv you.. LOL!!!.. See you are at eye level with me.. that is why you're the best! 😉

thelibran.. "900 posts and still not able to understand?? spend 900 days and still he will remain a puzzle"

Okay so now who is bursting whose ego bubble.. I guess you told me....

Nic your statement: "You know what though...ask any girl who has been with a libra. We are very agressive sexually it just never comes accross that way because we are very sensual and rarely make the first move. We bring a girl to the point where she is passionate about going all the way becuase once we get going....there are no breaks."

I have to agree, you are sooooo right on this note. However after they get comfortable with you, they can't keep their hands off of you.

Nic wrote:
"We like inspiring passion in others...we already went over that so I'll just wrap it up with saying that it is a lot more rewarding for us to drive a girl wild enough to jump on us then it is for us to jump on them."

Nic, now see, this must be what draws the Scorp woman and Libra male together. As you are the third Libra male on these posts who has mentioned a scorpio ex.. Scorp women are mysterious, but are straight forward when we want something. No guessing needed. We can be aggressive too.

Nic

.. still thinking about that one... still have no comment... still speechless..

Did I mention to you guys I enjoyed my evening with my LIbran last night? 😉.....thought about that comment at the time.....

..."After a Libra guy is comfortable with a relationship they have no problem sneaking up behind you, picking you up and throwing you on the bed with your pants around your ankles before you realize your not still in the same room"

and

"We like inspiring passion in others...we already went over that so I'll just wrap it up with saying that it is a lot more rewarding for us to drive a girl wild enough to jump on us then it is for us to jump on them."

I can see that!!!!!!!

Aqua....we both have naughty naughty little minds.....I might paste it one more time just for you:

..."After a Libra guy is comfortable with a relationship they have no problem sneaking up behind you, picking you up and throwing you on the bed with your pants around your ankles before you realize your not still in the same room"

What a statement!!!!!!!!!

"We are naive - u cannot force us to be something else
we are shy - u cannot change that part also
we dont make the fist move - there also there is no way u can change us
we always have our options open - you cannot force us to make a plan with all options closed"

Hmmmm yes - in a way you guys are so predictable if one can remember ALL of it *sigh*

Chatz.. yeh.. see how thelibran just kinda cut us down right there.. like as if to say... "if you don't like this about us then go to another board or find a guy with another sign" type of junk..

Oh well.. guess we're going to have to live WITH it.. Nicodemus is putting a spin on this..

Nicodemus.. I'm lovin' the homework..
?write down your personal convictions such as character traits about yourself that are absolute in who you are and what you require from other people. Then look at his wants and desires column and ask yourself if being with someone like him would require you to change who you are?

Ok, so I went through and wrote out traits about myself, and matched them up with his desires, or what I think would be his desires.. and it pretty much matches all except he does not want a committed relationship, but he knows if he is treading waters with me, I don't half-step. The time/distance factor may be the major issues for us also. But both of those things can work themselves out. Per your message on the "libra and distance" post.

?When compared to Aquas we tend to be a bit less disorganized and orderly in everything we do, and we don't like people trying to change that. this might drive you a bit crazy, and trying to "help" him will drive him a bit crazy. Take that into consideration?


Wouldn't try to change him. He allows me to learn a lot from the girls he dates. He tells me all their flaws and what he does not like about what they do.. I learn and don't do those things. Actually, make sure I am doing the opposite.

?Why do we like our women to be the aggressor??

Okay. You drove this point home. Understand now completely. Cannot refute that in any way.


I am trying to think on the next level.. I gotta be more forward with this.. it is just hard as this is not my nature.. I am working on it though, hard!!

Nic.. I went back to the first post you made.. still very true..

"Unfortunately, you Aquarians can be a little naive to the subtle affection of the Libra, it will come across as wishy-washy like it is.

The thing about the Libra male, he needs to hear at first not how much you like him, this will scare his non-commital tendancies, but rather how much you are attracted to him and why. This may seem like ego-stroking, and well....it is and that isn't something the Aquarians do much, but it is what a Libra male needs to get the ball rolling"

I wasnt trying to put an end to conversation. Just reminding that its impossible to change few things in us. Its possible that we realize and correct all these slowly once we get to know people. But when it comes to a new relationship, we are back to the same old libran nature.