How do you get him to be your lover & friend?

I take it that you don't want all of
you're defining this perfect lover and friend in terms of the things you do together...perhaps you should consider the communication aspect...I think that's what it'll come down to...
"I can organize and plan to offer my time to them and I can be committed to the friendship and attentive sexually. Just don't want a full-on relationship." Is this not a F-buddy??? Perhaps you should just hire an escort full time on call...Then again are you willing to make available your finances?