Cancer man never takes initiative?
Posted by Indigo1974Do you pay for the dates since you suggested them?Posted by LadyNeptunePosted by Indigo1974Posted by LadyNeptune
I don't agree that you should stop contacting him and suddenly assuming a passive roll. That's going to send the message that you are uninterested. Especially as you've said your always the one to initiate so far.
Perhaps he, understandably so, is under the impression you prefer to be the initiator as that is what you've shown him in the time you've been dating.
Just tell him you'd like him to plan the next date, and your free on x, y, and z days coming up. Then sit back and let him step up.
After a month, I think I’ve accepted that I’m driving the bus here. Every time I suggest a date, he very enthusiastically accepts. If that’s how I’m going to spend time with him, then that’s fine. Maybe I’m just so used to the traditional role of the man being the pursuer that I’m just not used to this new paradigm. I’ve read in many places that cancer man prefers to be the passive one in the relationship, and likes a bold woman who takes charge. It’s just a tricky spot because I don’t want to push him, but if I want to see him and spend time with him – which I always do, as a Libra Woman — then I need to be the one suggesting plans. I did talk to him about initiating texts, and he just explained that’s his thing and he’s gotten criticized for it before. But he’s actually really stepped up and made much more of an effort to reach out to me first, which I appreciate.
Perfect! So you've already communicated with him about initiating communication (texts) and he has made an effort. He likes you! Usually you have to say it a few times before it sinks in. He received your critique without retreating into his shell and catching an attitude.
So apply that same approach here. Let him know that while you do enjoy planning outings for the two of you, you would love it if he could take control and do so once in awhile. Give him the permission to do so.
Be bold! If you can take his dick in your body you certainly can tell him what you want out of the bedroom. (Crass I know, but true).
I'd also throw out all the generalizations you've been reading about Cancer men. Don't rely to heavily on that. He will show you who he is more than embittered strangers online.
We have our next date on Tuesday night, which I suggested of course, LOL. I’ll probably mention this to him then. He’s been very good about accepting my communication of my needs. I tried flirting with him while I was out of town last week, and he didn’t really reciprocate. It’s been like that for a couple of weeks, and it’s almost like he’s afraid to say anything that might give me the impression that he likes me. I’ve sent him a few sexy/racy photos that were a little more artsy – black-and-white – which is very vulnerable for me as a wheelchair user. He complimented them for the artistic quality and made no comment about me being sexy or pretty or anything. I’m like, seriously? You love the black-and-white contrast, but you can’t give me a compliment on my body? Every time I sent him (normal) photos of me, he would just say something like, looking good! I finally just told him, please for the love of God, just tell me I’m pretty. Looking good is something you would tell your kid after throwing a good pass at football practice. Then he *finally* told me I looked beautiful. He was SO free with the compliments the first week. I mean, GUSHING over me, but after we agreed to slow it down, he just can’t seem to let one go. It sucks because the Sexting was so heavy in the first week and I loved it SO much. I told him that it makes me feel a bit rejected when my efforts to flirt or sext aren’t reciprocated, and emphasized how much I enjoy doing that with him. I make it all about me and how good it makes me feel when he does certain things as opposed to criticizing anything he does or doesn’t do. That seems to be working.click to expand
Leave Your Feedback
We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.
Related Messages
Posted by alexscariesDavid Cameron scraping the barrelPosted by peachy06Posted by nanobotz
Harry should not have kept the identity of those racists within the royal family private for their sake. They deserve to be dragged like the ethnocentric bigots they are. British media still would somehow find a way to excuse the racist remarks though.
The dude wore the nazi symbol once. He is in it too.
So did Sid Vicious. So do punks in Japan as a tribute to 70s punk. It's shock value nothing more.
The super rich get free reign to do weird stuff like going to a fancy dress party as a nazi or David Cameron putting his penis in a dead pig's mouth for a university club photo. I'm not saying it's right, I'm saying they play by different rules.click to expand
🤣🥴😂
Posted by ScorpArieHilarious 😆Posted by MyStarsShine
His Scorpio 👁👁
And his “hiss” 😈
“Choke me”
😂😆🤣
I enjoy himclick to expand
you need to grow up.
Just binged on it... 9 episodes in one sitting, it's a great show, imo
https://www.netflix.com/title/81040344
https://www.netflix.com/title/81040344
Me too
Ended like maybe a squid games 2
Ended like maybe a squid games 2
So good!!
Posted by StardustRevolutionJust because you date, doesn’t mean it has to be serious! Find a lady who shares your same viewpoint. It’s nice to have companionship even if it’s mutually agreeable that it isn’t long term. It’s all about honesty and communication.Posted by _ang_anPosted by StardustRevolutionPosted by _ang_an
Date an older woman who doesn't have anyone else to spend her cash on.
Max i would do is 29
Thats an age people want to get married and have kids.
Well its over then, until i get my degree and job i guess i will be the funny guy of the class, the fun friend, idk everything besides dating materialclick to expand
Very good
Koreans make fantastic movies
Koreans make fantastic movies
Posted by stardustmopPosted by LentoBull91Posted by stardustmopPosted by AmessPosted by SassyKiwi
Idk but most likely he won't kiss you cause you're a loser already in a relationship who'd just go and kiss someone else after him if the kiss does not end up giving you these magical sparks you seek or whatever delusion you're chasing
I told you it’s more complicated than that. I’m really just seeking advice on his to get him to go for it. From what i have read about bulls they won’t. They are stubborn and because of morals and principles he won’t. I don’t want to make such a huge decision without knowing. I suppose that may seem dumb to you but you don’t know the particulars of the other relationship
Morals and principles. Lol. He’s already holding your hand and telling you he loves you. You’re putting him on a pedestal. They’re human too.
Be he doesn’t act on his urges the way he would like, which is what our morals are all about, having self control of ones self.
I understood what she said. I do think they will act on their urges though. I’ve witnessed it.
Posted by stardustmopPosted by LentoBull91Posted by stardustmopPosted by AmessPosted by SassyKiwi
Idk but most likely he won't kiss you cause you're a loser already in a relationship who'd just go and kiss someone else after him if the kiss does not end up giving you these magical sparks you seek or whatever delusion you're chasing
I told you it’s more complicated than that. I’m really just seeking advice on his to get him to go for it. From what i have read about bulls they won’t. They are stubborn and because of morals and principles he won’t. I don’t want to make such a huge decision without knowing. I suppose that may seem dumb to you but you don’t know the particulars of the other relationship
Morals and principles. Lol. He’s already holding your hand and telling you he loves you. You’re putting him on a pedestal. They’re human too.
Be he doesn’t act on his urges the way he would like, which is what our morals are all about, having self control of ones self.
I understood what she said. I do think they will act on their urges though. I’ve witnessed it.click to expand
Low tier bulls won’t stand by their morals and what’s right, the more evolved ones will. Those are the real taureans that people should keep an eye out for and seek out. They will test your morals in the process of testing their own. The fact that he admitted to her that he slipped up by holding her hand tells me he knows what’s right and he shouldn’t be doing that, he may back off from her if he feels he can’t keep himself in control. But he also can’t deny the chemistry and urge for physical contact from her.
If his will is not strong enough he may slip up, it can happen. Her being a Virgo will make it a challenge for him from my own personal experience with this type of connection.
Posted by HamstheticsAgreePosted by rabidtalkerPosted by Hamsthetics
Even when they're happened to not be gifted with hot body or nice face, why?
How can you be able to deal with their darkness without a great s3x and hot body in return?
Did not read the other four+ pages, just responding before I read the rest. There are some scorpios (as there are in all signs) who are just gold that are not enshrouded in darkness and negativity. these are the ones that will not hurt you in any way, dont play any games, will look out for you and are very straight forward. However, this is like 1 in 100, the negative stuff you mention is there in others, and in these cases it is not worth dealing with because it is their stuff to work on, not yours.
Scorps and caps are similar to me in that they are both surprisingly sensitive on some things and the pain they feel can be very deep and unnoticed by others. The pain will be due to different things as both are attuned differently and both want different but similar things in life. stereotypically caps wanting status whereas scorps want power for its own sake. This pain, especially if early on in life can shape how they deal with the outside world for a lifetime. Whenever I meet folks of these signs I always hope they dont carry this early life pain.
You are very observant and understanding. Thank you for being so kind.click to expand
