Cancerbuddy:
I can tell you're just GORGEOUS!
I can tell you're just GORGEOUS!
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Hmmm...I'm a bit confused ScorpGal5 - you say you "like to get to know someone before the romance begins...then I can be genuine." What if you were genuine to begin with and allowed the relationship to unfold in it's own time - even during the romance as this too is part of the relationship? To me, if I desire a relationship with a "real" person then it must begin with me being real at the onset of any relationship. I also feel that we will always be discovering someone as long as we are in a relationship with them...change is constant. The choice is whether we want to go the distance and is this relationship enhancing my life, my world and me.
Awesome article "Q"! as always you crack open the door to let the light shine in 
Thank you~
Thank you~
just incase you're wondering...
Nothing has happened yet, we somehow got into a little fight, and it's my fault too, but me and my pride... you know how Leos can be! So i've been ignoring him and usually the more i ignore, the more he keeps coming to see me, but this time it's working the other way... I guess he figures "you want to ignore me, no problem! I'll ignore you too!" so THATS what's happening .... ABSOLUTELY NOTHING... and i'm so sad, i wish you, Moloko were here next to me so that you could slap me around a little so that i'd get my act together! ....
The clock is ticking... and he will be gone from here soon... i feel pressured...
Nothing has happened yet, we somehow got into a little fight, and it's my fault too, but me and my pride... you know how Leos can be! So i've been ignoring him and usually the more i ignore, the more he keeps coming to see me, but this time it's working the other way... I guess he figures "you want to ignore me, no problem! I'll ignore you too!" so THATS what's happening .... ABSOLUTELY NOTHING... and i'm so sad, i wish you, Moloko were here next to me so that you could slap me around a little so that i'd get my act together! ....
The clock is ticking... and he will be gone from here soon... i feel pressured...
Hi Freebird,
I like to think I am always genuine... I was responding to Qbone's comment about pretending.
The conversation was about thinking we are 'in love' and who/what we are in love with. I just meant that I would never express that I was in love with someone early on in a relationship - that's just not realistic and doesn't fit with the idea of loving the real person that you can only get to know later. I would want to be more sure that I was in love with the real person - not just the idea of them - before I expressed any sentiments like that.
Hmm - not sure if that explains or not? I'm pretty sure we actually share similar views on this subject.
Scorpgal
I like to think I am always genuine... I was responding to Qbone's comment about pretending.
The conversation was about thinking we are 'in love' and who/what we are in love with. I just meant that I would never express that I was in love with someone early on in a relationship - that's just not realistic and doesn't fit with the idea of loving the real person that you can only get to know later. I would want to be more sure that I was in love with the real person - not just the idea of them - before I expressed any sentiments like that.
Hmm - not sure if that explains or not? I'm pretty sure we actually share similar views on this subject.
Scorpgal
Ok, I am about to put all of my business out there so be gentle, please. As some of you may remember, I have these ongoing issues with my ex. We dated for 2 years in an uncommitted relationship, he is an Aqua too. Well he was cheated on twice by two different girls, I think he might have asked one of them to marry him at one time. He lacks emotion and has issues with rejection. I think a lot of it stems from childhood, his father remaried after a divorce and his mother sent him to be raised by her father while she started another family.
I have always been told that the relationship was probably about sex if he wouldnt commit, so I would second guess everything. I also have issues with trust because both my father and brother-in-law cheated on their wives and had children outside of marriage.
Early December I sent him a letter saying that I didnt want to be with him. Before you all read the e-card, you should know that I think that premarital sex is ok for ME as long as we plan on being together for the long haul, but I cant see myself with someone who is JUST in it for sex..... for me it would be immoral. Anyway after a bad argument and then not talking to him for the next month, he out of the blue decides that he wants to commit. He does stuff suspiciously. He'll block his number. He told me that he was getting a new phone number and I couldnt have it unless I came to see him. He gets so uncomfortable talking on the phone and he always resorts to sex conversation, THE SAME CONVERSATION(dont get me wrong he has intellect and we have good conversations). I figure its because he is uncomfortable and doesnt know how to express his feeling(he is no smooth talker, we didnt engage in sex until 5 months after we met..my choice). We havent been active for about 8 months so maybe this is the problem. In the end I thought he was commiting for the sex.
So I sent him this e-card.
http://www.msn.americangreetings.com/view.pd?i=385153339&m=2329&source=msne999
Aww man! Why did I do that. He calls and tells me that that wasnt the reason he made the discision, he was rethinking his life(26 years old and 1 kid) and its time for him to start getting serious but whatever its over now. I fell like such an idiot. I have been in so much pain over the last 2 months worrying if it will heal itself. I can live without him but I dont want to he is a part of me. I really messed it up this time.
I have always been told that the relationship was probably about sex if he wouldnt commit, so I would second guess everything. I also have issues with trust because both my father and brother-in-law cheated on their wives and had children outside of marriage.
Early December I sent him a letter saying that I didnt want to be with him. Before you all read the e-card, you should know that I think that premarital sex is ok for ME as long as we plan on being together for the long haul, but I cant see myself with someone who is JUST in it for sex..... for me it would be immoral. Anyway after a bad argument and then not talking to him for the next month, he out of the blue decides that he wants to commit. He does stuff suspiciously. He'll block his number. He told me that he was getting a new phone number and I couldnt have it unless I came to see him. He gets so uncomfortable talking on the phone and he always resorts to sex conversation, THE SAME CONVERSATION(dont get me wrong he has intellect and we have good conversations). I figure its because he is uncomfortable and doesnt know how to express his feeling(he is no smooth talker, we didnt engage in sex until 5 months after we met..my choice). We havent been active for about 8 months so maybe this is the problem. In the end I thought he was commiting for the sex.
So I sent him this e-card. http://www.msn.americangreetings.com/view.pd?i=385153339&m=2329&source=msne999
Aww man! Why did I do that. He calls and tells me that that wasnt the reason he made the discision, he was rethinking his life(26 years old and 1 kid) and its time for him to start getting serious but whatever its over now. I fell like such an idiot. I have been in so much pain over the last 2 months worrying if it will heal itself. I can live without him but I dont want to he is a part of me. I really messed it up this time.
Well, let's look at this post in reverse.. what if a woman wrote this? My thought would be, how about you stop dating players?
If this were a woman, and SHE dated nothing but married men- or men with girlfriends... then say something lame like, "it's a shame, I was a nice girl at one point in time... I would think that she is delusional.... and trying to blame other people/society for her own bad behavior. I would say that she is jaded because of the people she chooses to date-- and if she wants something better, she needs to get a grip and stop screwing around with men who have girlfriends and/or wives. Also, if she thinks that "outing" a man to his perspective wife or girlfriend, doesn't aleviate her from her role as PART of the trashiness/scandal that comes as a result of the relationship.
Perhaps this is an honest account of someone's life- but I think it's scummy (both him and the ladies he dates).. not because he's a man-- just because seems more like he's part of problem. Why complain if he's only helping to perpetrate?
If this were a woman, and SHE dated nothing but married men- or men with girlfriends... then say something lame like, "it's a shame, I was a nice girl at one point in time... I would think that she is delusional.... and trying to blame other people/society for her own bad behavior. I would say that she is jaded because of the people she chooses to date-- and if she wants something better, she needs to get a grip and stop screwing around with men who have girlfriends and/or wives. Also, if she thinks that "outing" a man to his perspective wife or girlfriend, doesn't aleviate her from her role as PART of the trashiness/scandal that comes as a result of the relationship.
Perhaps this is an honest account of someone's life- but I think it's scummy (both him and the ladies he dates).. not because he's a man-- just because seems more like he's part of problem. Why complain if he's only helping to perpetrate?
And can we please stop blaming the sad shape our culture is on women?
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I completely understand SG5 what you are saying now - thanks for explaining and...yes, we do share very similar views on this subject 
So, how ya doing these days?
So, how ya doing these days?I don't Primegen.. or I are blaming the sad shape of our culture on women. My point.. to this post.. is that the things this guy is noticing does not excuse his own bad behavior. Just because he (the guy who posted this) notices that there are more women who are cheating- doesn't mean he should stop being a "nice guy".... and if he does, sounds like a weakness within himself. Being a better person starts with self... if he finds that a woman has a boyfriend- or a shady relationship with other men-- then don't date her.