Do I still love him?
Posted by AmuseOneself
I'm new here so I hope no one minds that I just jump in.
I'd say you are going to have to decide how important sex is to you. You said the attraction faded away quickly so have you actually had sex with him? Does he suck at it? I don't think you should base a relationship on sex but I think to some it's a very big deal.
I'm not like a sexpot myself. I am/was rather happy to have mind stimulating conversations with my guy than to pant between the sheets. But, we did not have sex, for like two years - and we tried, but I just did not become aroused at all. It really made me frustrated (as I wrote in the original post) Because I could be and was turned on by other means.
We had sex, like seven or eight times during our whole relationship... (TMI, maybe? but maybe some details would help people understand the issue?) though he and I was apart for the good half of our relationship due to his academy stuff. The first sex was good -not amazing, but then I've really never had orgasm or mind blowing sex my entire life lol-, then there was a hot make-up sex after one and only big fight. After that, it really did not happen and when it did happen, I hardly felt anything... I suspect I may be frigid. And that is why I feel bad about this whole thing and break up - very likely, the problem is on my end, not on his.
He's rather reserved and shy when it comes to the matter whilst I'm quite the opposite, so I told him directly what would turn me on and work for me and be aggressive and the initiator (and I can say that he appreciated me for my forwardness), and him being a considerate lover and a gentleman, he tried to comply to and understand my needs.
Even though I do not get pleasures from sex the act itself, I appreciate the connection and intimacy sex can bring to a couple. It's quite a different thing from being connected/on the same wavelength on mentally.
The conclusion I drew out so far is - that he and I were just not sexually compatible. And I hate it, if that is the case.
(though I know maybe I just have to accept it as it is... sometimes, that's just life :/)
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