How do you Cappy men feel about Virgo women?
Posted by MPosted by Peanutbutter
Why do you say that?
Isn't this question emblazoned on the Virgo family crest?
Bahaha it might as well be..click to expand
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Posted by StillWater
Emotionally loaded...if I am close to that person and it sounds urgent, 1-2 days.
If their disclosure is making me uncomfortable but they are important to me, 3-5 days.
If they are not important and it's just drama, then i don't need time to digest. I'll just reply with something short, like "ok".
Thank you for the clear and concise answer.
Sweethearts, the big picture/problem is that he chose to put himself in a situation that clearly indicates a lack of consideration for the other's feelings. He may do this to his wife all the time b/c there are no real consequences for his actions when he does that. Getting mad for 1 day, but then taking him back & never requiring that he fix that specific issue is NOT considered facing real consequences.
There is such a thing as a dominant doormat. It's when a person convinces themselves that they are sticking up for themselves since they can scream, complain, shout & argue about something that is really bothering them, but yet fail to realize that the best way to teach others how to treat them is to show them better than they can tell them.
If her husband can stand a few moments of an attitude & 1 small argument from his wife, knowing that she'll just be over it in a couple of days, that explains why he's had no incentive to change his behavior during those situations
His wife is still his wife lol so that tells me that he is still doing it, not b/c he's an evil person, but b/c she allows it. And that's human nature. We do things that others allow us to get away with
To be fair, some people don't consider this 1 time occasional lack of consideration to be a deal breaker. Some women chalk it up to men being "men" or people being "people," gripe about it for 2 seconds & then let it go. That is rational considering the fact that deals shouldn't be broken if there is no perceived deal breaker present.
However, the woman who considers this a deal breaker the 1st or even the 3rd time it happens, is being just as rational by leaving the guy or feeling different about the relationship. Why? B/c deal breaking means deal-breaker! Which means it's over if this happens once OR more than once. If she perceives it to be a deal breaker, then she's only screwing herself & giving him no incentive to change if she refuses to act on (cut ties) the minute a deal breaker has happened.
So it all depends. I can understand why some people would consider this deal breaking or the straw that leads to other problems in the relationship. However, I can also understand why some people would consider this small & let it roll off their backs (mainly when their partner does everything else right)
There is such a thing as a dominant doormat. It's when a person convinces themselves that they are sticking up for themselves since they can scream, complain, shout & argue about something that is really bothering them, but yet fail to realize that the best way to teach others how to treat them is to show them better than they can tell them.
If her husband can stand a few moments of an attitude & 1 small argument from his wife, knowing that she'll just be over it in a couple of days, that explains why he's had no incentive to change his behavior during those situations
His wife is still his wife lol so that tells me that he is still doing it, not b/c he's an evil person, but b/c she allows it. And that's human nature. We do things that others allow us to get away with
To be fair, some people don't consider this 1 time occasional lack of consideration to be a deal breaker. Some women chalk it up to men being "men" or people being "people," gripe about it for 2 seconds & then let it go. That is rational considering the fact that deals shouldn't be broken if there is no perceived deal breaker present.
However, the woman who considers this a deal breaker the 1st or even the 3rd time it happens, is being just as rational by leaving the guy or feeling different about the relationship. Why? B/c deal breaking means deal-breaker! Which means it's over if this happens once OR more than once. If she perceives it to be a deal breaker, then she's only screwing herself & giving him no incentive to change if she refuses to act on (cut ties) the minute a deal breaker has happened.
So it all depends. I can understand why some people would consider this deal breaking or the straw that leads to other problems in the relationship. However, I can also understand why some people would consider this small & let it roll off their backs (mainly when their partner does everything else right)
Posted by Sammy20Posted by truecap
You're female and she's female?
Is she gay or does she see you only as friends? If she's talking about guys like that then she may be straight.
Which is why I asked her out and pointedly flirted with her. In a way I guess i'm playing games as well? I'm trying to figure out what her game is. Because she flirts, stares at me when she thinks I'm not looking and is always around. Everytime my class is over she's there to say hi. She was shy and awkward at first then it turns out she can talk just as much as myself, now she's back to shy and awkward. She pays me too much attention yet she'd say something random like "i need a foreign guy" while we're talking about nothing in particular. And when I get annoyed she'd say "you're jealous, I can tell". Despite all this bs, she is a friend first and so I can put this aside if she'll stop playing games with me otherwise I'll just play along until i've had enough.click to expand
It sounds like she's playing games to me. Most likely it's coming from a place of insecurity. OR she's trying to have some sort of power over you - like if you get jealous that means you like her more.
I'd ignore her little comments and let her know indirectly that she's not pushing your buttons.
You might also could try being direct with her and say "look, I'm having a hard time reading you, so I'm going to have to back up here until you decide what you want". Nothing threatening, just a matter of fact, non-emotional statement of the raw facts.
Spot on. Nice post
Posted by james tate
I ALWAYS GO TO TRUECAP
IF I DON,T LIKE HER ANSWER
I GO TO CAPGIRL69
IF HER ANSWER SUCKS I
GO TO AQUA IF THATS NO GOOD
I GO TO THE PUB
Cheers!
*passes Tate a pint*
YOUR POST DID NOT POST ON MY SCREEN
RABBIT BRAIN
RABBIT BRAIN
Posted by mfwb55
I always thought emotionally infidelity was when you with your partner instead of liking s.o. you find yourself liking another. This usually spells the end for relationships though it depends on the two people involved and what their terms of agreement are before going into the relationship before hand.
That is just 1 aspect of emotional infidelity. There are many layers to emotional infidelity. Plus, many people define it in many different ways
A simple definition of emotional infidelity is when you allow someone other than your partner to fulfill an emotional, psychological, sexual or intimate need. Notice I said "allow." It's a choice. A person doesn't just walk up to you, say hi & from there both walking away saying they have a "connection." lol
It takes conversation, energy, time to get to know them, thought & effort. There's way too many things that have to take place 1st before things even get to a point of you feeling a connection worth pursuing with another person. And b/c these things take a lot of thought, effort & time, it def. is a choice.
That is why I cringe every time someone says that they cheated (physically) b/c "it just happened." BULL. Taking off your clothes, putting on a condom & deciding where to have sex is not something that just happens. And if so, you need to run like hell from the person who is walking around sexing everybody w/o once ever having thought about it at all!
It hurts to the person being cheated on to learn the REAL truth that the person who cheated actually DID think about it BUT choose to go along with it anyway, BUT that is almost always the case & the truth. And especially with emotional cheating b/c it requires 10 times more effort, thought & time to build an emotional connection than it does a physical one, hence the reason some people feel that emotional infidelity is WORSE & is more unforgivable than physical cheating
Probably just very socially awkward, so he buries himself in work, where he feels is his element and where he's comfortable.
Sleeping with the door closed is a habit, probably feels more secure that way. I can't sleep with the door closed because I want to be able to hear if someone is in my house, however, there was a time I didn't feel secure unless the door was closed. Just what he's used to.
The sitting outside at a diner, well, the air makes the food stale or it allows flies and mosquitos to bother you.
This man is comfortable and set in his ways. There's not a lot that is going to entice him out of his comfort zone.
*just my two cents*
Sleeping with the door closed is a habit, probably feels more secure that way. I can't sleep with the door closed because I want to be able to hear if someone is in my house, however, there was a time I didn't feel secure unless the door was closed. Just what he's used to.
The sitting outside at a diner, well, the air makes the food stale or it allows flies and mosquitos to bother you.
This man is comfortable and set in his ways. There's not a lot that is going to entice him out of his comfort zone.
*just my two cents*
Posted by isthistheone
What do you think?
That you're a cunt who is using sex as emotional blackmail.
Posted by tiki33
stop being insecure as in thinking the worst, give the guy a chance, kiss him, let him kiss you
and don't make this into a situation where he has to bail out on you because you're behaving as if you're both in a real relationship when you're not.
Well stated.
With Bulls, there are no gray areas. No assumptions. No room for abstract, ambiguous, or misguided subtle hints from a prospective partner. You're in a relationship with a Taurus or you're not. Attempting to connect the two by creating your own 'labels', (especially if it's a label of 'ambiguity'...We're not exclusive, but you're still off the market...I do not have to reciprocate any aspect of affection, but I can't be friend-zoned) will leave you on the sidewalk, baffled.
The are no gray skies full of clouds....stay as close to reality as possible. Re-read your post, and understand the role you played in this situation.