Posted by Ariescorpisces
I told him I'm taking it a day at a time with him, however he told me to tell him if I ever decide to date anyone else so he can let go of hope. He has to have a lot of time under his belt in order to prove to me he is committed to sober living and has to make amends to me, my family and friends. He put me in a really rough spot where I had to terminate the lease and was left paying a lot of his bills because it would directly affect my credit ( cosigned the lease). He has to pay me back amongst other things. He said he is prepared to do that as he works the 12 step program, which making amends is one of the steps. I haven't told him that I am still so ridiculously in love with him, but I have told him I hope he can get through his recovery and come out a better person. I don't want to give him false hope because I am not sure if it is the best thing for my future children/ myself. I guess he just needs a lot more time to prove himself. Deep in my heart I know he can do all of these things, but there's a small part of me that says " what if he relapses?" What then? I'm stuck in a town with no-one in possible financial ruin? What if I had children? It all just seems impossible and so far away of us being together. But I have so much hope it all works out. UGHN. so again, letting go or holding on is a major dilemma.