Signed Up:
Feb 26, 2008Comments: 0 · Posts: 8735 · Topics: 522
Ok first off, if he felt like you would be a good candidate for his future, he would've brought that to your attention already.
If after he shut down, he sensed that it hurt you or caused you to question things, he would've def. came back & given you the reassurance that you needed, IF he was that into you
To set the record straight, Aquarian men have been known to be very non-committal in the very beginning. NOT the whole time! Not for 2 & 4 & 10 years! Huge difference.
There's a huge difference b/w "I hesitated a little in the beginning" VS "I'm still hesitating 2+ years later." It doesn't take 2 years for a man to assess your worth & figure out where you place in his life.
All this overly cautious stuff on both ends is def. killing the vibe. Caution & hesitation can be a good thing in the beginning b/c you're right, you can't let everybody in until they've proven themselves. However, if neither of you feel that the other hasn't proven themselves yet a whole 2 years later then something deeper is def. going on. Either:
1. You're both commitment-phobes in disguise, playing the "above the surface/don't get too close" mind games with yourselves & with each other.
2. You're both commitment-phobes in disguise & are just entertaining each other b/c the lack of aggressiveness & vulnerability allows you two to feel "safe." And "safe" is the ideal setting for a closet commitment-phobe who's in denial about being a commitment-phobe.
3. 1 or both of you are just using each other until something better comes along.
4. You're feelings aren't below the surface b/c you two aren't engaging in the level of conversation, intimacy or activities together that are most likely to bring forth a below the surface connection in the 1st place
Personally I think it's a mixture of #1 & #2. The only reason his hesitation doesn't bother you as much as it should is b/c you're just as noncommittal as he is. If you were a fearless warrior whose shield wasn't the size of Texas, him not offering commitment by this point would've been considered the ultimate waste of time.
The question isn't why would he stay around, it's why wouldn't he? He's a commitment-phobe, most likely for NON astrology-related reasons. If you're the 1 girl who's willing to wait around for him to "figure out what he wants" then of course he's gonna keep entertaining this friendship, relationship or whatever it is that you 2 have going on.
Signed Up:
Feb 26, 2008Comments: 0 · Posts: 8735 · Topics: 522
You allowing/enabling him to not give you reassurance after he shuts down without you having to come out of character to get it 1st is YOUR fault. If 1 or both of you are THAT afraid of vulnerability, communicating & making sound emotional decisions about the other, then neither of you have no business dating each other or dating period.
All that caution & excuse making is exactly how 2 people end up HERE, in this exact situation. Stop it
Signed Up:
Feb 26, 2013Comments: 4 · Posts: 147 · Topics: 10
The user who posted this message has hidden it.
Signed Up:
Mar 02, 2014Comments: 368 · Posts: 2669 · Topics: 7
@duchessedenemours I think CC was trying to figure what's wrong with Lindsey. She's one of us, & we hate seeing another Crab suffer. @CluelessCancer means well & we told her what's wrong with Lindsey. No need for drama as this thread wasn't made for that. Lets not fight here
Ignore them.
If they ask, politely tell them to piss off thanks.
Just because you would do it for all the wrong reasons
Also, how you dare to act like a moral police when you fucked the guy knowing he has a g/f. You obv didn't give a shit about her
Signed Up:
Jan 30, 2014Comments: 3 · Posts: 1399 · Topics: 28
it's not that it's creepy or morally wrong, but if I were the guy, I would not go near anyone under 18, because even if it seems legal on first glance, there are too many ways for the law to turn on you, and then you can easily end up as a RSO.
Treading on very thin ice...I wouldnt risk it.
Even though from 16-19, legal limits seem pretty arbitrary to me.