Sagittarius mother
This topic was created in the Pisces forum by vivalapisces on Thursday, July 16, 2009 and has 10 replies.
I am wondering if any other Pisceans here have a Sag mother... maybe even father. I don't know if male vs. female Sags differ so much...
Anyways my mom is a Sagittarius, and I seem to get along with most Sags, but she is insufferable. She gambles all her money away, and feeds off of making people jealous over her. She has treated me like garbage my entire life, yet loves me like crazy, and is clingy. I had to move away from her for my sanity, but I still work with her. She's going through a lot right now because my father has left and moved miles and miles away for his own sanity as well. At work she takes everything out on me and it's starting to affect her job... I think since it's her territory she thinks that people will look at me like I'm in the wrong, when in reality you'd have to be blind to think that how she speaks to me is okay. She even laid her hands on me once in the office getting pushy, so the boss got involved.
Yes, I am aware that I have to leave this place, but I can't just yet. The job market is tough, and I can't seem to get an interview in my field (I'm fresh out of college). For now I have to stay so that I can pay rent and live my life... but I was wondering if anyone can relate and perhaps have some advice, insight, etc. I don't know what to do anymore. They love my performance at work, I am always willing to help EVERYONE, at ANYTIME.
Has anyone gone through anything similar to this? She doesn't listen and there's nothing that I want more than to coexist with her peacefully.
Anyways my mom is a Sagittarius, and I seem to get along with most Sags, but she is insufferable. She gambles all her money away, and feeds off of making people jealous over her. She has treated me like garbage my entire life, yet loves me like crazy, and is clingy. I had to move away from her for my sanity, but I still work with her. She's going through a lot right now because my father has left and moved miles and miles away for his own sanity as well. At work she takes everything out on me and it's starting to affect her job... I think since it's her territory she thinks that people will look at me like I'm in the wrong, when in reality you'd have to be blind to think that how she speaks to me is okay. She even laid her hands on me once in the office getting pushy, so the boss got involved.
Yes, I am aware that I have to leave this place, but I can't just yet. The job market is tough, and I can't seem to get an interview in my field (I'm fresh out of college). For now I have to stay so that I can pay rent and live my life... but I was wondering if anyone can relate and perhaps have some advice, insight, etc. I don't know what to do anymore. They love my performance at work, I am always willing to help EVERYONE, at ANYTIME.
Has anyone gone through anything similar to this? She doesn't listen and there's nothing that I want more than to coexist with her peacefully.
I am wondering if any other Pisceans here have a Sag mother... maybe even father. I don't know if male vs. female Sags differ so much...
Anyways my mom is a Sagittarius, and I seem to get along with most Sags, but she is insufferable. She gambles all her money away, and feeds off of making people jealous over her. She has treated me like garbage my entire life, yet loves me like crazy, and is clingy. I had to move away from her for my sanity, but I still work with her. She's going through a lot right now because my father has left and moved miles and miles away for his own sanity as well. At work she takes everything out on me and it's starting to affect her job... I think since it's her territory she thinks that people will look at me like I'm in the wrong, when in reality you'd have to be blind to think that how she speaks to me is okay. She even laid her hands on me once in the office getting pushy, so the boss got involved.
Hi there! I'm cappysweetie
My mother's mom (which is my grandmother) is a Sagittarius -- 2nd decan. This sounds exactly like my mom's experience. She was treated horribly by my grandmother yet the woman would have a fit if my mom tried to run away! :O
Anyways my mom is a Sagittarius, and I seem to get along with most Sags, but she is insufferable. She gambles all her money away, and feeds off of making people jealous over her. She has treated me like garbage my entire life, yet loves me like crazy, and is clingy. I had to move away from her for my sanity, but I still work with her. She's going through a lot right now because my father has left and moved miles and miles away for his own sanity as well. At work she takes everything out on me and it's starting to affect her job... I think since it's her territory she thinks that people will look at me like I'm in the wrong, when in reality you'd have to be blind to think that how she speaks to me is okay. She even laid her hands on me once in the office getting pushy, so the boss got involved.
Hi there! I'm cappysweetie
My mother's mom (which is my grandmother) is a Sagittarius -- 2nd decan. This sounds exactly like my mom's experience. She was treated horribly by my grandmother yet the woman would have a fit if my mom tried to run away! :O
"Hi there! I'm cappysweetie
My mother's mom (which is my grandmother) is a Sagittarius -- 2nd decan. This sounds exactly like my mom's experience. She was treated horribly by my grandmother yet the woman would have a fit if my mom tried to run away! :O"
Hey cappysweetie,
So your mom never broke away from her? My mom is a 1st decan Sag, and I had to leave because I was at the verge of a nervous breakdown. Even just working with her pushes me sometimes. She is very manipulative... she has tried to sabotage pretty much everything in my life. How did your mom deal with it? It must have affected her emotionally, but I know overcoming it is possible, it will just take some work. I know the first thing I have to do is get another job... but I feel that when I leave this job we probably wont speak AT ALL. It's good and bad I guess... life is just too short for this nonsense. It's pretty ridiculous you know, but c'est la vie.
Sorry that your mom had to go through this too.
My mother's mom (which is my grandmother) is a Sagittarius -- 2nd decan. This sounds exactly like my mom's experience. She was treated horribly by my grandmother yet the woman would have a fit if my mom tried to run away! :O"
Hey cappysweetie,
So your mom never broke away from her? My mom is a 1st decan Sag, and I had to leave because I was at the verge of a nervous breakdown. Even just working with her pushes me sometimes. She is very manipulative... she has tried to sabotage pretty much everything in my life. How did your mom deal with it? It must have affected her emotionally, but I know overcoming it is possible, it will just take some work. I know the first thing I have to do is get another job... but I feel that when I leave this job we probably wont speak AT ALL. It's good and bad I guess... life is just too short for this nonsense. It's pretty ridiculous you know, but c'est la vie.
Sorry that your mom had to go through this too.
Posted by vivalapisces
"Hi there! I'm cappysweetie
My mother's mom (which is my grandmother) is a Sagittarius -- 2nd decan. This sounds exactly like my mom's experience. She was treated horribly by my grandmother yet the woman would have a fit if my mom tried to run away! :O"
Hey cappysweetie,
So your mom never broke away from her? My mom is a 1st decan Sag, and I had to leave because I was at the verge of a nervous breakdown. Even just working with her pushes me sometimes. She is very manipulative... she has tried to sabotage pretty much everything in my life. How did your mom deal with it? It must have affected her emotionally, but I know overcoming it is possible, it will just take some work. I know the first thing I have to do is get another job... but I feel that when I leave this job we probably wont speak AT ALL. It's good and bad I guess... life is just too short for this nonsense. It's pretty ridiculous you know, but c'est la vie.
Sorry that your mom had to go through this too.
My mom broke away from her but it took an awful long time for her to do it. Which is very understandable because thats her mother but as I've grown older, I think if my mom couldn't have found strength agaisnt my grandmother sooner, she would be better off.
"My mom broke away from her but it took an awful long time for her to do it. Which is very understandable because thats her mother but as I've grown older, I think if my mom couldn't have found strength agaisnt my grandmother sooner, she would be better off."
The only reason why i was able to break away is because my father called a favor from a friend, but she sabotaged that too. Thankfully I saved $ $ $ just in case. After I graduated I had to get out, and now I live in an apt with no ties to her. I almost told her the address, but instead I only let her know the area. She was being nice to me for like three days... so I was stupid and coaxed into sharing the neighborhood with her. So stupid of me. I don't plan on inviting her over here either. Wanted to, but that would just hurt me in the long run. I feel better off, but it still hurts me when she deliberately does things to get a reaction out of me. I've learned to hide my feelings from her, and control myself at work when she does it, but the relationship with her is hopeless I guess.
I got out at 23... how old was your mom cappysweetie? Did they ever get resolve anything?
The only reason why i was able to break away is because my father called a favor from a friend, but she sabotaged that too. Thankfully I saved $ $ $ just in case. After I graduated I had to get out, and now I live in an apt with no ties to her. I almost told her the address, but instead I only let her know the area. She was being nice to me for like three days... so I was stupid and coaxed into sharing the neighborhood with her. So stupid of me. I don't plan on inviting her over here either. Wanted to, but that would just hurt me in the long run. I feel better off, but it still hurts me when she deliberately does things to get a reaction out of me. I've learned to hide my feelings from her, and control myself at work when she does it, but the relationship with her is hopeless I guess.
I got out at 23... how old was your mom cappysweetie? Did they ever get resolve anything?
"The thing with Sags is that they offend you 1day and the next they like you and act like nothing happend."
Yes she is exactly like that, one second she's mad at you and cursing about you behind your back, then the next she is joking around with you, but lately she's been holding grudges on people. Long grudges for really trivial reasons. I think it's just because she is miserable, and is trying to make life for other people as miserable as possible so she's not alone. I do try to adopt that attitude (keeping in mind that she's mad one second, and cool the next), and sometimes it works. Lately I think my dilemma is just from built up anger. You're right, she is toxic, and lately I find myself shaking at work, with my stomach twitching and going it knots, it really has been acting up. I mean we all have our own problems right, so it's unbelievable to me when my mother acts like I have nothing going on in my world, and tries to blame everything wrong in her world on me. I wish it wasn't so hard for some people to look in the damn mirror and evaluate themselves. It is sad that I can't have a relationship with her... but it is what it is unfortunately.
I'm aiming to find a new place of employment and get away from this job by the end of the year. Thanks girls.
Yes she is exactly like that, one second she's mad at you and cursing about you behind your back, then the next she is joking around with you, but lately she's been holding grudges on people. Long grudges for really trivial reasons. I think it's just because she is miserable, and is trying to make life for other people as miserable as possible so she's not alone. I do try to adopt that attitude (keeping in mind that she's mad one second, and cool the next), and sometimes it works. Lately I think my dilemma is just from built up anger. You're right, she is toxic, and lately I find myself shaking at work, with my stomach twitching and going it knots, it really has been acting up. I mean we all have our own problems right, so it's unbelievable to me when my mother acts like I have nothing going on in my world, and tries to blame everything wrong in her world on me. I wish it wasn't so hard for some people to look in the damn mirror and evaluate themselves. It is sad that I can't have a relationship with her... but it is what it is unfortunately.
I'm aiming to find a new place of employment and get away from this job by the end of the year. Thanks girls.
I'm a pisces, and my mother is a sag. I can't say.... we've ever experienced the dynamic you are speaking of. My mother is truly the greatest thing I could ever ask for in a mom, and has become a close friend of mine.
On another note, I do know a sag girl (a friend of mine), who does get out of control sometimes like you have described. From her I've learned the following:
My biggest feeling on this (or thought on it), is that your mom might feel hurt in some way (by you, or by someone else, or by everyone). And instead of admitting to this, or communicating with you about it, she is masking it by trying to take control in other ways. (Which would make sense being a fire sign... to act on feelings first.... and think about them later). Pride may have a lot to do with her acting the next day as if nothing happened. Or she may truly think it has been dealt with because the day passed.
It's truly an exercise in piscean forgiveness and patience. To be able to set aside your own feelings, and open armed "understand" your mother. It's definitely a tough thing to do, but in the end will likely prove worth it - seeing as it is your mother. (Not preaching, just suggesting possible ways to make the situation better).
On another note, I do know a sag girl (a friend of mine), who does get out of control sometimes like you have described. From her I've learned the following:
My biggest feeling on this (or thought on it), is that your mom might feel hurt in some way (by you, or by someone else, or by everyone). And instead of admitting to this, or communicating with you about it, she is masking it by trying to take control in other ways. (Which would make sense being a fire sign... to act on feelings first.... and think about them later). Pride may have a lot to do with her acting the next day as if nothing happened. Or she may truly think it has been dealt with because the day passed.
It's truly an exercise in piscean forgiveness and patience. To be able to set aside your own feelings, and open armed "understand" your mother. It's definitely a tough thing to do, but in the end will likely prove worth it - seeing as it is your mother. (Not preaching, just suggesting possible ways to make the situation better).
my mom is a 2nd decan sagittarius but she is quite the opposite of what you have described though. she is VERY controlling and very dominant (she wears the pants in my household and started the family biz all on her own). being an aries, i butted heads with her worse than anyone else (even still to this day) and she has a ridiculous amount of energy but i have so much love for her because she's a fighter and she will survive any tragedy that comes along. that said, she is very conservative and very stuck in her way...she won't listen to ANYBODY and she mouths off worse than I do (very impulsive with words. speaks first, thinks later). i love my sagi mom though
No offense, but I don't think your mother is the way she is because she's a sag... I think it's because she's abusive and obviously doesn't know how to deal with whatever it is that's making her treat you this way.
"My biggest feeling on this (or thought on it), is that your mom might feel hurt in some way (by you, or by someone else, or by everyone). And instead of admitting to this, or communicating with you about it, she is masking it by trying to take control in other ways. (Which would make sense being a fire sign... to act on feelings first.... and think about them later). Pride may have a lot to do with her acting the next day as if nothing happened. Or she may truly think it has been dealt with because the day passed."
I agree with this very much, and pride definitely has a lot to do with it. Yes I admit, she has a huge heart. She loves me, and I know that, and if I need anything she will give it to me. She has definitely sacrificed a lot to give me what she didn't have, but then again I sometimes thinks it makes her envious. She also feels if she gives you something that she can be mean and hurtful without any consequence. It's tough, lately she's been good, but I've decided that I just have to distance myself from her as much as possible. I work with her, but outside of that I have to distance myself. She is definitely abusive, and I've tried to get her to make an appointment with our primary doctor (we have the same one). I spoke to the doctor personally to mention to her a few things that have been worrying me, and she said she'll keep it in mind next time she sees her. She won't go see the doctor though or a therapist like I have suggested... she's so stubborn. Thank you for all of your input. Hopefully things will get better with her, I'd love to be able to say she is like a very close friend of mine one day too. Wish me luck.... Enjoy your weekends fishies.
I agree with this very much, and pride definitely has a lot to do with it. Yes I admit, she has a huge heart. She loves me, and I know that, and if I need anything she will give it to me. She has definitely sacrificed a lot to give me what she didn't have, but then again I sometimes thinks it makes her envious. She also feels if she gives you something that she can be mean and hurtful without any consequence. It's tough, lately she's been good, but I've decided that I just have to distance myself from her as much as possible. I work with her, but outside of that I have to distance myself. She is definitely abusive, and I've tried to get her to make an appointment with our primary doctor (we have the same one). I spoke to the doctor personally to mention to her a few things that have been worrying me, and she said she'll keep it in mind next time she sees her. She won't go see the doctor though or a therapist like I have suggested... she's so stubborn. Thank you for all of your input. Hopefully things will get better with her, I'd love to be able to say she is like a very close friend of mine one day too. Wish me luck.... Enjoy your weekends fishies.
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