Sag pretty much dumped me last night

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by Deedee75 on Wednesday, February 5, 2020 and has 97 replies.
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It was an odd conversation

He didn't actually say it, but he said it.

I’m sorry
We weren't arguing or anything.

He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us.

I asked what he was saying and he talked around it. I asked him why he would dump me after last week and not before?

He said it's not me. It's the distance and that he had a good time, a really really good time.

Then he had to go and would talk to me later. I said, "really? You drop a bomb and dump me by text and will talk to me later?"

Him: I really didn't drop a bomb. I didn't dump you.

Me: yeah, ya kind of did

No communication since. He is flying today
We had a good time last week. We get along great. He tells me he loves me all the time and I believed him.

Brought me a nice bottle of perfume.

I don't get it at all.
The conversation left me unsure but him not texting or calling later pretty much summed it up.

I just shipped his Valentine's present yesterday too. Now, he is going to think I'm a stalker when he gets it
Posted by PhoenixStorm

So maybe he was just thinking out loud saying that he didn’t like it, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s over. Did he actually say it’s over or was he just saying he doesn’t like the distance between you?


He didn't say it.

But by not reaching out later said a lot
Posted by Black-Mamba

wow you really know how to take things to the nth level.


What do you mean?
Posted by Black-Mamba
Posted by Deedee75

The conversation left me unsure but him not texting or calling later pretty much summed it up.

I just shipped his Valentine's present yesterday too. Now, he is going to think I'm a stalker when he gets it


you're turning into a paranoid anxious looney tune
click to expand


Pot meet kettle 😘
Posted by Black-Mamba

or is this like your intuition gut feeling speaking?

i don't know if i believe in that stuff anymore


Its a push/pull. He gets close and pulls back. It happens and I sometimes get curious, other timea I let it be. Depends on my hormones that day.

But he's never said something like this.
Posted by Black-Mamba
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by Black-Mamba
Posted by Deedee75

The conversation left me unsure but him not texting or calling later pretty much summed it up.

I just shipped his Valentine's present yesterday too. Now, he is going to think I'm a stalker when he gets it


you're turning into a paranoid anxious looney tune


Pot meet kettle 😘


This is why its so hard to get close to anybody, you always waiting for that shoe to drop

its a circular battle within self
click to expand


Yes!

My last relationship ghosted me after 7 years. It's hard to get passed that and not carry it with me
Posted by PhoenixStorm
Posted by Deedee75

I asked him why he would dump me after last week and not before?

He said it's not me. It's the distance and that he had a good time, a really really good time.


If this was the flow of the conversation I can kinda understand why you concluded that he was breaking up with you. So when you asked why he would dump you after last week, this was his response? But then afterward he says he didn’t dump you?

Were you actually together??
click to expand


Yes. We both travel for work and met on the road about 6 months ago. Spent a week together and pretty much clicked. It is long distance for now but we do visit as much as possible and had plans of moving in together in 18 months. We knew the timeline from the beginning.

We were together last week for 5 days and had a great time.
Posted by Black-Mamba

Anyways DeeDee hugs, this is tough. I hope for your sake you can get through this.

i know you told me you gave up on love until he came into your life and i was hopeful that one day that might happen for me

So i am going to keep the light burning for you


Thank You. It will happen for you.....for both of us
So....the present that I sent him is one of those bracelets for couples in long distance relationships. We can make the other's light up to tell them we are thinking of them.

Corny especially now.

Posted by ArilovesAqu

Granted I don’t know this situation at all but why do you assume he dumped you rather than planting a seed that you should be closer? Like move in together etc? I’m so confused. He didn’t seem like he was rejecting you at all.


We have a timeline. My son and his daughter both finish school in June 2021. We were planning on finding a place and moving in together in August. He wanted Cali, where he used to live so we were going to look out there.

Neither of us would leave our kids. That was off the table

*I hope that you are right though
"He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us."

He said he didn't like the long distance (between you). Honestly, do you...?
Posted by Undine

"He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us."

He said he didn't like the long distance (between you). Honestly, do you...?


No....I hate every second of it.
Well why did you assume the worst?? Maybe what he wanted to say was that long distance is really difficult for both of you and to consider taking things further? Maybe he wants marriage instead of dumping? People don't usually go from one to the opposite extreme. Just relax and see what happens
Posted by pisceanloves

Well why did you assume the worst?? Maybe what he wanted to say was that long distance is really difficult for both of you and to consider taking things further? Maybe he wants marriage instead of dumping? People don't usually go from one to the opposite extreme. Just relax and see what happens
I would love for you to be right
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by Undine

"He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us."

He said he didn't like the long distance (between you). Honestly, do you...?


No....I hate every second of it.
click to expand
Exactly! He was just being honest.

Isn't that the ultimate sacrifice...to carry on doing something you hate, just to be with the one you love? He said he will be carrying on meeting you, didn't he? Maybe he was just trying to pay you a backward compliment.
Posted by Undine
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by Undine

"He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us."

He said he didn't like the long distance (between you). Honestly, do you...?


No....I hate every second of it.


Exactly! He was just being honest.

Isn't that the ultimate sacrifice...to carry on doing something you hate, just to be with the one you love? He said he will be carrying on meeting you, didn't he? Maybe he was just trying to pay you a backward compliment.
click to expand


I hope so.

I'm just going to lay low and see what happens.
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by PhoenixStorm

So maybe he was just thinking out loud saying that he didn’t like it, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s over. Did he actually say it’s over or was he just saying he doesn’t like the distance between you?


He didn't say it.

But by not reaching out later said a lot
click to expand
But he's flying right? So he gets a pass. If a week goes by and he doesn't reach out then yeah... its over.
Posted by thatlibralife
Posted by Deedee75

We weren't arguing or anything.

He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us.

I asked what he was saying and he talked around it. I asked him why he would dump me after last week and not before?

He said it's not me. It's the distance and that he had a good time, a really really good time.

Then he had to go and would talk to me later. I said, "really? You drop a bomb and dump me by text and will talk to me later?"

Him: I really didn't drop a bomb. I didn't dump you.

Me: yeah, ya kind of did

No communication since. He is flying today


This makes my heart ache.

Nobody likes long distance romances. I mean who would? You Scorps always so fatalistic. Going straight to dump mode. I feel like you put those thoughts in his head. He probaly didn't even mean it that way. I dunno but I would call him as soon as you can to straighten this out. Great love connections can be hard to come by. Fight for this!

I have determined that I'm giving my all in my relationship and not letting misunderstandings get in the way.. Screw that...wishing you well...
click to expand


Thank you.

He's a Sag sun but way more scorp like than me, thanks to his rising, mercury and mars.

I'm trying to put myself in his head right now and figure out where he is coming from.
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by PhoenixStorm

So maybe he was just thinking out loud saying that he didn’t like it, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s over. Did he actually say it’s over or was he just saying he doesn’t like the distance between you?


He didn't say it.

But by not reaching out later said a lot


But he's flying right? So he gets a pass. If a week goes by and he doesn't reach out then yeah... its over.
click to expand


A long flight too and a busy work weekend.

We are a lot alike. He called me the female version of him. We get in a work zone.

He will fly back home on Monday.
Posted by Deedee75

We weren't arguing or anything.

He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us.

I asked what he was saying and he talked around it. I asked him why he would dump me after last week and not before?

He said it's not me. It's the distance and that he had a good time, a really really good time.

Then he had to go and would talk to me later. I said, "really? You drop a bomb and dump me by text and will talk to me later?"

Him: I really didn't drop a bomb. I didn't dump you.

Me: yeah, ya kind of did

No communication since. He is flying today
He didnt say anything because he didnt want to get stabbed
Do you have vday plans with him?

Who knows maybe him saying 'I hate long distance' was the precursor to opening the convo to a 'let's move in together/get married' vibes. But you killed the mood by saying your dumping me.

I have a feeling he'll be back.
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by Undine

"He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us."

He said he didn't like the long distance (between you). Honestly, do you...?


No....I hate every second of it.
click to expand
You're actually on the same page.
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by PhoenixStorm

So maybe he was just thinking out loud saying that he didn’t like it, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s over. Did he actually say it’s over or was he just saying he doesn’t like the distance between you?


He didn't say it.

But by not reaching out later said a lot


But he's flying right? So he gets a pass. If a week goes by and he doesn't reach out then yeah... its over.


A long flight too and a busy work weekend.

We are a lot alike. He called me the female version of him. We get in a work zone.

He will fly back home on Monday.
click to expand
Try not to get too much in your head. Keep it calm cool and collected.

If Tuesday rolls around and its crickets be like, so I guess you did dump me via phone call/text. Classy.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Do you have vday plans with him?

Who knows maybe him saying 'I hate long distance' was the precursor to opening the convo to a 'let's move in together/get married' vibes. But you killed the mood by saying your dumping me.

I have a feeling he'll be back.


Our next plans weren't until March.

We already covered the marriage/move in together stuff and had a plan. The distance was temporary and we knew it would be hard
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by PhoenixStorm
Posted by Deedee75

I asked him why he would dump me after last week and not before?

He said it's not me. It's the distance and that he had a good time, a really really good time.


If this was the flow of the conversation I can kinda understand why you concluded that he was breaking up with you. So when you asked why he would dump you after last week, this was his response? But then afterward he says he didn’t dump you?

Were you actually together??


Yes. We both travel for work and met on the road about 6 months ago. Spent a week together and pretty much clicked. It is long distance for now but we do visit as much as possible and had plans of moving in together in 18 months. We knew the timeline from the beginning.

We were together last week for 5 days and had a great time.
click to expand


Interesting im a sag and when I dated a sag I always missed him like crazy AFTER he would leave. He was the same way.

But we always talked about it. It wasnt a prelude to a breakup. It was just acknowledging our current feelings.

Then we would both go and focus on a hobby or a job and then reconnect.
Posted by DMV
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by PhoenixStorm
Posted by Deedee75

I asked him why he would dump me after last week and not before?

He said it's not me. It's the distance and that he had a good time, a really really good time.


If this was the flow of the conversation I can kinda understand why you concluded that he was breaking up with you. So when you asked why he would dump you after last week, this was his response? But then afterward he says he didn’t dump you?

Were you actually together??


Yes. We both travel for work and met on the road about 6 months ago. Spent a week together and pretty much clicked. It is long distance for now but we do visit as much as possible and had plans of moving in together in 18 months. We knew the timeline from the beginning.

We were together last week for 5 days and had a great time.


Interesting im a sag and when I dated a sag I always missed him like crazy AFTER he would leave. He was the same way.

But we always talked about it. It wasnt a prelude to a breakup. It was just acknowledging our current feelings.

Then we would both go and focus on a hobby or a job and then reconnect.
click to expand


This was by text. I may have misunderstood.

I don't know. I have to get in his head. He told me Monday that he loved me on a phone call and last week, in person.

Long distance is hard
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by Undine
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by Undine

"He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us."

He said he didn't like the long distance (between you). Honestly, do you...?


No....I hate every second of it.


Exactly! He was just being honest.

Isn't that the ultimate sacrifice...to carry on doing something you hate, just to be with the one you love? He said he will be carrying on meeting you, didn't he? Maybe he was just trying to pay you a backward compliment.


I hope so.

I'm just going to lay low and see what happens.
click to expand
Yes, calm yourself down. He may not be an expert in giving reassurance, but nobody's perfect.

It's the man who loves LDR you should be worried about Big Grin


I read his message as you paraphrased twice...he really didn't dump you, he's probably just frustrated with the long distance.

After having such a great time, he's down about the fact that he can't see you for awhile.

I've been in the same position before, so I know how he might be feeling.

He did tell you that he didn't break up with you right? He just has something he wants to get off his mind and discuss.

Have some patience and hear him out. It may not be all bad.
This is why I love DXP

You guys calm my crazy.

It's much better to freak out here than to send him a thousand irrational texts. Thank You everyone!
Gurl, you're far too hot inside & out to dump just like that ESPECIALLY after all those plans. Personally I have no experience with Sags, but from what I know: if he made it this far in the marathon to MAKE plans like that, he's hooked for the longhaul.

TL;DR: you're crazy.

But fear not! Your fairy godson is here to dispel all the crazy away with my magic wand.

User Submitted Image

Now go take a cold shower and dip your head in ice water for 30 seconds to get rid of any lingering crazy. You sizzling bishbish you.

User Submitted Image
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShow

Gurl, you're far too hot inside & out to dump just like that ESPECIALLY after all those plans. Personally I have no experience with Sags, but from what I know: if he made it this far in the marathon to MAKE plans like that, he's hooked for the longhaul.

TL;DR: you're crazy.

But fear not! Your fairy godson is here to dispel all the crazy away with my magic wand.

User Submitted Image

Now go take a cold shower and dip your head in ice water for 30 seconds to get rid of any lingering crazy. You sizzling bishbish you.

User Submitted Image


💋I love you
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShow

Gurl, you're far too hot inside & out to dump just like that ESPECIALLY after all those plans. Personally I have no experience with Sags, but from what I know: if he made it this far in the marathon to MAKE plans like that, he's hooked for the longhaul.

TL;DR: you're crazy.

But fear not! Your fairy godson is here to dispel all the crazy away with my magic wand.

User Submitted Image

Now go take a cold shower and dip your head in ice water for 30 seconds to get rid of any lingering crazy. You sizzling bishbish you.

User Submitted Image


💋I love you
click to expand
That's no surprise to me. I'm a Sag rising

User Submitted Image
This doesn't sound like he's dumping you. It sounds like he's being honest and telling you that long distance is hard. Sounds like he misses you and you are being a bit dramatic, which he is used to.

Posted by NemDeux

Also on another note .....lot of tension between scorp and sags ....wonder whats up?


Good question!

Anyone?
Posted by NemDeux
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by NemDeux

Also on another note .....lot of tension between scorp and sags ....wonder whats up?


Good question!

Anyone?


My best friend who is a scorp had quite unpleasant and heated discussions with 3 individual sags just these past few days.

At work a sag is not interacting with a scorp 🥶

No idea whats in the atmosphere.
click to expand


Hmmmmm.....I would love to blame this in the stars and get back to normal soon.

Stereotypically, a sag and scorp shouldn't be compatible but when I input are exact birth info, our synastry is off the charts! Best partner reading that I have ever received regardless of what site I use. We have something special, I just hope we didn't fuck it up

Posted by Deedee75
Posted by NemDeux
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by NemDeux

Also on another note .....lot of tension between scorp and sags ....wonder whats up?


Good question!

Anyone?


My best friend who is a scorp had quite unpleasant and heated discussions with 3 individual sags just these past few days.

At work a sag is not interacting with a scorp 🥶

No idea whats in the atmosphere.


Hmmmmm.....I would love to blame this in the stars and get back to normal soon.

Stereotypically, a sag and scorp shouldn't be compatible but when I input are exact birth info, our synastry is off the charts! Best partner reading that I have ever received regardless of what site I use. We have something special, I just hope we didn't fuck it up
click to expand
Does he have Scorpio in his chart? If so, I can see why it works. And do you have Sag in yours?

You seem to worry a lot. But I don't think that's much of an issue, it would probably be cute to him. It just shows that you care.
Posted by NemDeux
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by NemDeux
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by NemDeux

Also on another note .....lot of tension between scorp and sags ....wonder whats up?


Good question!

Anyone?


My best friend who is a scorp had quite unpleasant and heated discussions with 3 individual sags just these past few days.

At work a sag is not interacting with a scorp 🥶

No idea whats in the atmosphere.


Hmmmmm.....I would love to blame this in the stars and get back to normal soon.

Stereotypically, a sag and scorp shouldn't be compatible but when I input are exact birth info, our synastry is off the charts! Best partner reading that I have ever received regardless of what site I use. We have something special, I just hope we didn't fuck it up


Yes it would be convenient to scapegoat some constellation ....but more likely it has to do with dynamics and learned/triggered behaviour. Instead of trying to understand his thinking process, use this as an oppurtunity to reflect on your previous relationships, how was your communication style , your comfort level, your emotional security ....how did things end? Suddenly? Patterns?

If your love is strong enough, it will sail over this incident.

But pressure in this difficult situation will not have the wished outcome.
click to expand


That's why I'm going to back off and not contact him. Let him figure things out.

This is both of our first LDR and we both travel for work, him more than me, but we still spend a lot of time in hotels.

We are both divorced with kids. Our youngest are the same age. We both have similar interests, likes and long term goals. When we are together, things are very smooth. We have great chemistry and enjoy each other's company.

It's the phone/text part that causes drama. He is bad at it.
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by NemDeux
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by NemDeux

Also on another note .....lot of tension between scorp and sags ....wonder whats up?


Good question!

Anyone?


My best friend who is a scorp had quite unpleasant and heated discussions with 3 individual sags just these past few days.

At work a sag is not interacting with a scorp 🥶

No idea whats in the atmosphere.


Hmmmmm.....I would love to blame this in the stars and get back to normal soon.

Stereotypically, a sag and scorp shouldn't be compatible but when I input are exact birth info, our synastry is off the charts! Best partner reading that I have ever received regardless of what site I use. We have something special, I just hope we didn't fuck it up


Does he have Scorpio in his chart? If so, I can see why it works. And do you have Sag in yours?

You seem to worry a lot. But I don't think that's much of an issue, it would probably be cute to him. It just shows that you care.
click to expand


He has scorpio Mars, Mercury and Rising and a Gemini moon, Sag Venus. He also has a first house stellium so very Aries like.

My only Sag placement is Neptune but I have a Gemini rising and heavy Aries placements.
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by NemDeux
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by NemDeux

Also on another note .....lot of tension between scorp and sags ....wonder whats up?


Good question!

Anyone?


My best friend who is a scorp had quite unpleasant and heated discussions with 3 individual sags just these past few days.

At work a sag is not interacting with a scorp 🥶

No idea whats in the atmosphere.


Hmmmmm.....I would love to blame this in the stars and get back to normal soon.

Stereotypically, a sag and scorp shouldn't be compatible but when I input are exact birth info, our synastry is off the charts! Best partner reading that I have ever received regardless of what site I use. We have something special, I just hope we didn't fuck it up


Does he have Scorpio in his chart? If so, I can see why it works. And do you have Sag in yours?

You seem to worry a lot. But I don't think that's much of an issue, it would probably be cute to him. It just shows that you care.


He has scorpio Mars, Mercury and Rising and a Gemini moon, Sag Venus. He also has a first house stellium so very Aries like.

My only Sag placement is Neptune but I have a Gemini rising and heavy Aries placements.
click to expand
That's probably the reason you guys mesh so well. He's a watery Sag and you're a Fiery Scorpio. It keeps things interesting smile
Posted by Undine
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by Undine
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by Undine

"He said that he didn't like long distance. It's hard for both of us."

He said he didn't like the long distance (between you). Honestly, do you...?


No....I hate every second of it.


Exactly! He was just being honest.

Isn't that the ultimate sacrifice...to carry on doing something you hate, just to be with the one you love? He said he will be carrying on meeting you, didn't he? Maybe he was just trying to pay you a backward compliment.


I hope so.

I'm just going to lay low and see what happens.


Yes, calm yourself down. He may not be an expert in giving reassurance, but nobody's perfect.

It's the man who loves LDR you should be worried about Big Grin
click to expand
This!
I'm sorry but, where did he tell you that he was done with this or breaking up? I see it as he was saying "I had a really good time together, this being apart sucks balls"

That does not equate a breakup, maybe a change of how the situation is currently going but for cereals - don't push him away cause of what you THINK is goin down.
Posted by NemDeux

Also on another note .....lot of tension between scorp and sags ....wonder whats up?
Hadn't noticed any tension.

I barely know any scorpios irl
I'm Scorpio dominant btw, in Pullen at least...n Mars. Sag and Aries are tied 2nd not more than a degree or two less...anywho. I feel like you jumped a few Bridges and decided on YOUR OWN how HE feels instead of asking and HEARING what he is saying to you...
Posted by CuddleBug1288

I'm Scorpio dominant btw, in Pullen at least...n Mars. Sag and Aries are tied 2nd not more than a degree or two less...anywho. I feel like you jumped a few Bridges and decided on YOUR OWN how HE feels instead of asking and HEARING what he is saying to you...


Story of my life
Posted by Deedee75
Posted by CuddleBug1288

I'm Scorpio dominant btw, in Pullen at least...n Mars. Sag and Aries are tied 2nd not more than a degree or two less...anywho. I feel like you jumped a few Bridges and decided on YOUR OWN how HE feels instead of asking and HEARING what he is saying to you...


Story of my life
click to expand


Sorry to hear. ☹️😘💛

But. Biggest mistake with a Sag, which you may understand (having Sag placements) is to tell us, or set a place of actions or values, etc, on us because we don't want to be boxed in. We want to be ourselves, if people can endure that, cool beans...if not, it's gonna be a little more difficult to get us to stay out for too long
Posted by tiziani

This is the heartbeat ring




I like that!

I saw a heartbeat pillow online but couldn't find a way to order it. I was excited for the bracelet. He should receive it on Tuesday. Hopefully, things will be patched up by then.
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