Chassing Virgo Rabbit
This topic was created in the Virgo forum by kristal22 on Monday, January 26, 2009 and has 16 replies.
Help,
I met a Virgo man online (moon in Gemini, Venus in Scorpio) . We met shortly after and hit it off he kissed me first all was good. We have been speaking for about a month now in total and he lives 2 hrs away. He is a single father and so am I,(single mother) he recently divorced from a 14 yr marriage.
Daily he messages me and we will chat for hrs and we get along awesome. A couple of weeks ago he advised me how he thought he should be alone for awhile but wanted to continue getting to know me. He has initiated all contact with me since still chatting for hrs. 2 days ago he mentioned how he misses me and is afraid that I will hurt him etc how I was to good to be true. I asked when I would see him again live in the flesh as its been a month since our first meeting and his answers where I dunno.
Yesterday morning I woke up and since I thought this Virgo and I had a great connection I would drive to his house to see him. I called him when I was approx 30 min away and advised him how I was on my way to see him as I missed him. ( please note he has mentioned to me that he is a guy who will drop by unexpected and was thinking of doing it to me) I told him if me going to see him was a bad idea to tell me know and I would go home. He then gave me directions to his house. I pull up in the drive way he comes to my SUV and sits in it for no more then 2 min and then says I better give u ur hug so I can go back inside as my 4 yr old is taking a bath. I was pissed I drove 4hrs 4 nothing
WTF!!!! Excuse my language but this man as told me even 2 days ago how much he is into me and how much he likes me and how is afraid to lose this connection etc etc?then I go out of my way and he rejects me?.please note that our conversations are deep and meaningful and have been since our 1st meeting. Ive never pressured him until and advised him I will move at his pace until yesterday morning. He has sent me offline messages telling me how beautiful I am how he misses me etc?.
From a virgos perspective did I go over board by going to visit him and if so then why when I called him to advise him I was on my way why didn't he just tell me he had plans why did he proceed to give me directions to his house if he didn't want to see me
I met a Virgo man online (moon in Gemini, Venus in Scorpio) . We met shortly after and hit it off he kissed me first all was good. We have been speaking for about a month now in total and he lives 2 hrs away. He is a single father and so am I,(single mother) he recently divorced from a 14 yr marriage.
Daily he messages me and we will chat for hrs and we get along awesome. A couple of weeks ago he advised me how he thought he should be alone for awhile but wanted to continue getting to know me. He has initiated all contact with me since still chatting for hrs. 2 days ago he mentioned how he misses me and is afraid that I will hurt him etc how I was to good to be true. I asked when I would see him again live in the flesh as its been a month since our first meeting and his answers where I dunno.
Yesterday morning I woke up and since I thought this Virgo and I had a great connection I would drive to his house to see him. I called him when I was approx 30 min away and advised him how I was on my way to see him as I missed him. ( please note he has mentioned to me that he is a guy who will drop by unexpected and was thinking of doing it to me) I told him if me going to see him was a bad idea to tell me know and I would go home. He then gave me directions to his house. I pull up in the drive way he comes to my SUV and sits in it for no more then 2 min and then says I better give u ur hug so I can go back inside as my 4 yr old is taking a bath. I was pissed I drove 4hrs 4 nothing
WTF!!!! Excuse my language but this man as told me even 2 days ago how much he is into me and how much he likes me and how is afraid to lose this connection etc etc?then I go out of my way and he rejects me?.please note that our conversations are deep and meaningful and have been since our 1st meeting. Ive never pressured him until and advised him I will move at his pace until yesterday morning. He has sent me offline messages telling me how beautiful I am how he misses me etc?.
From a virgos perspective did I go over board by going to visit him and if so then why when I called him to advise him I was on my way why didn't he just tell me he had plans why did he proceed to give me directions to his house if he didn't want to see me
Also note that its going on 24hrs since my road trip to see him and he hasn't contacted me in any way
Im sorry but I think your title says it all. 
you can't chase these guys and they arn't rabbits.
Personally I don't think you can just drop by like that. I think you should have called in advance and asked him if you could come over. Not call 30 mins away.
Im sorry I haven't much advice except give him some space, and maybe stop counting the hours.
you can't chase these guys and they arn't rabbits.Personally I don't think you can just drop by like that. I think you should have called in advance and asked him if you could come over. Not call 30 mins away.
Im sorry I haven't much advice except give him some space, and maybe stop counting the hours.
Ummmm yeah that was a strange thing to do - dont you think it would have been a better idea if you'd have discussed this with him first? and nah i dont think you should chase at all.
Sounds like he seriously isnt ready for anything REAL at this point in time....and who knows? maybe he really isnt single?? and perhaps somebody was inside? For him to not spend more time with you, to say "I'd better give you your hug"? it kinda spells out that he didnt want you there and it was meant to go at HIS pace and he's not ready for somebody to be full on.
Dunno, that's all very strange.
Man I hate online and long distance relationships....so much secrecy, deception and pain.....argghhhhh
Sounds like he seriously isnt ready for anything REAL at this point in time....and who knows? maybe he really isnt single?? and perhaps somebody was inside? For him to not spend more time with you, to say "I'd better give you your hug"? it kinda spells out that he didnt want you there and it was meant to go at HIS pace and he's not ready for somebody to be full on.
Dunno, that's all very strange.
Man I hate online and long distance relationships....so much secrecy, deception and pain.....argghhhhh
I am Aqua. I get that I put him on the spot its normally in my opinion if a guy is truly into you he will want to see you hang out with you not just talk for hrs and establish only that. I was trying to prove to him by going there that I am not a girl who is serious about him, and I am not a girl looking for a fling. I thought by showing up like that , he would of felt flattered. Not I feel like a complete Idiot!!! i just wanna hide under the covers
sorry i ment a girl WHO IS serious about him, typos there sorry guys
If he is into you as much as it sounds .. then I guarantee you that he is thinking about your drive to him. And I don't mean thinking about it in a bad way ... like thinking, damn her, what the fuck was that ... kind of thinking, I mean thinking like ... awe, look what she did for me.
Kristal these men are really wierd when it comes to actually opening up and not being afraid of emotional investments like everyone else ... they feel very awkward in physical encounters (in the beginning) because they realize that closeness with a person is apart of giving impressions to people about their feelings. It's hard to explain.
Anyway .. don't feel stupid about what you did. In fact, as much as it made you feel unwanted by him pushing you away .... in his mind, right now, he is probably thinking about how sweet that was for you to do that and it must mean you care about him.
They will "think" about endearments
They will "act" out pushing you away
And I know .. that is words not matching actions ... but, you just have to understand these creatures to get that it's not a deception .. it's like their feelings for people have to catch up, and until they do, they are very conscientious of how their actions might make a display of feelings that haven't been sorted out yet. Hopefully that makes sense.
On the other side of this ... a different angle ... it seems rather suspicious that he would turn you away, even if he was going through his weird Virgo feeling-out-routine of himself. The Virgo's I know would have invited you at least in the house to pee, to have a drink, and then to make sure you could make it back home. They wouldn't just send you away at the curb, even if they felt like you were intruding upon their personal space. Virgo's are the epitome of manners, normally and I find what he did kind of rude ... and that is out of the ordinary for a Virgo to do.
So, that might lead me to believe that somebody was in the house .. afterall, should a 4-year-old even be left in a tub by himself? Anything could happen to a child bathing, he could slip .. and shouldn't there be adult supervision standing by? Not outside, hugging in a car. I would think that there was another adult in the house.
Whatever happened ... I promise you that he IS thinking about it, thinking about it hard .. because Virgo's think about everything, every action, every word, every insinuation, every intention ... thinking is what defines them.
Kristal these men are really wierd when it comes to actually opening up and not being afraid of emotional investments like everyone else ... they feel very awkward in physical encounters (in the beginning) because they realize that closeness with a person is apart of giving impressions to people about their feelings. It's hard to explain.
Anyway .. don't feel stupid about what you did. In fact, as much as it made you feel unwanted by him pushing you away .... in his mind, right now, he is probably thinking about how sweet that was for you to do that and it must mean you care about him.
They will "think" about endearments
They will "act" out pushing you away
And I know .. that is words not matching actions ... but, you just have to understand these creatures to get that it's not a deception .. it's like their feelings for people have to catch up, and until they do, they are very conscientious of how their actions might make a display of feelings that haven't been sorted out yet. Hopefully that makes sense.
On the other side of this ... a different angle ... it seems rather suspicious that he would turn you away, even if he was going through his weird Virgo feeling-out-routine of himself. The Virgo's I know would have invited you at least in the house to pee, to have a drink, and then to make sure you could make it back home. They wouldn't just send you away at the curb, even if they felt like you were intruding upon their personal space. Virgo's are the epitome of manners, normally and I find what he did kind of rude ... and that is out of the ordinary for a Virgo to do.
So, that might lead me to believe that somebody was in the house .. afterall, should a 4-year-old even be left in a tub by himself? Anything could happen to a child bathing, he could slip .. and shouldn't there be adult supervision standing by? Not outside, hugging in a car. I would think that there was another adult in the house.
Whatever happened ... I promise you that he IS thinking about it, thinking about it hard .. because Virgo's think about everything, every action, every word, every insinuation, every intention ... thinking is what defines them.
Thanks for all your advice, and I can see the logic on why virgo wants to take things slow but in all honesty I don't want my time wasted and I am having a hard time differentiating him just being slow or him wasting my time for an ego boost. I guess time will tell?.based on my own judgment from reading this forum it doesn't sound like Virgos character to waste someone's time if they aren't interested. ?.is there a secret to hurry them up? Lol
Also just curious here, if I wanted to see how Mr Virgo is in romance how he views it approaches it etc shouldn't I be looking at his Venus sign? His Venus is in Scorpio
Also just curious here, if I wanted to see how Mr Virgo is in romance how he views it approaches it etc shouldn't I be looking at his Venus sign? His Venus is in Scorpio
"it doesn't sound like Virgos character to waste someone's time if they aren't interested"
That is both true and false. Certainly, once they realized that an interest in taking it further wasn't present, they would tell you straight up that they don't want to go to the next level .. so, on one hand, no they wouldn't waste your time. On the other hand, it takes them a very long time to make the determination whether they are even interested or not.
"is there a secret to hurry them up?"
Yes .. take control of your life, rather than wait for them to make this determination whether they are interested or not. During this gruelling wait for them to decide, a part of what they are pondering is whether you are an independent person who has confidence and knows your path .. or whether you are a co-dependent type and will cling to them to make your life for you.
They have an aversion to people who are co-dependent upon them, which makes no sense really since they love to serve and provide for thier partners .. I know, it doesn't make sense. Anyway, if you appear clingy, dependent .. they will frown upon this. So, to hurry them up to make this decision, you will have to show him that you are perfectly fine in your life without him. You like him, you want him .. but, you don't have to have him to be fulfilled. This will hurry the process up, however, he'll still take eons to decide.
"to see how Mr Virgo is in romance how he views it approaches it etc shouldn't I be looking at his Venus sign?"
No .. you should be looking in his pants, as well as reaching in his pants.
That is both true and false. Certainly, once they realized that an interest in taking it further wasn't present, they would tell you straight up that they don't want to go to the next level .. so, on one hand, no they wouldn't waste your time. On the other hand, it takes them a very long time to make the determination whether they are even interested or not.
"is there a secret to hurry them up?"
Yes .. take control of your life, rather than wait for them to make this determination whether they are interested or not. During this gruelling wait for them to decide, a part of what they are pondering is whether you are an independent person who has confidence and knows your path .. or whether you are a co-dependent type and will cling to them to make your life for you.
They have an aversion to people who are co-dependent upon them, which makes no sense really since they love to serve and provide for thier partners .. I know, it doesn't make sense. Anyway, if you appear clingy, dependent .. they will frown upon this. So, to hurry them up to make this decision, you will have to show him that you are perfectly fine in your life without him. You like him, you want him .. but, you don't have to have him to be fulfilled. This will hurry the process up, however, he'll still take eons to decide.
"to see how Mr Virgo is in romance how he views it approaches it etc shouldn't I be looking at his Venus sign?"
No .. you should be looking in his pants, as well as reaching in his pants.
No .. you should be looking in his pants, as well as reaching in his pants........hahahahaha
well thanks again and i will keep u updated on to what happends...still havent heard from him and i will not be contacting him either, he knows where to find me
well thanks again and i will keep u updated on to what happends...still havent heard from him and i will not be contacting him either, he knows where to find me
Hee hee...
A bit out of topic... but this thread reminds me of Scott Speedman (he played Ben in the past series 'Felicity'). He is also a 'Virgo' born in year of the 'Rabbit'.
A bit out of topic... but this thread reminds me of Scott Speedman (he played Ben in the past series 'Felicity'). He is also a 'Virgo' born in year of the 'Rabbit'.
Okay in my defense, now that some time as gone by and I;ve given it some thought my behavior was totally iritic and impulsive yes. I should of known better to go to his house knowing there was a child there but I was driven by emotion and not logic. In reality what I was trying to prove to this individual is that I was serious about him and taking things further. I was trying to calm his fear of falling in love etc. I assumed with our in depth conversations we had that if he would of felt that I was unsafe for his child/children to be around that he would of stopped things from progressing. I also thought since he mentioned multiple times about stopping by my house sporadically that he wouldn't of mind. I also never asked or mention to meet his child.
In all honesty I've had my time wasted by so many men who just wanted a chat buddy and not make things real I was worried that this was happening again. He would confuse me by telling me how he wanted to see me all the time and wished I was closer so he could see me how he missed me etc, how he should just stop by unannounced how I was perfect for him but when ever I would ask when we would see each other again his replies where always ?I dunno?. I was afraid that since 4 weeks went by that if we didn't see each other I would have been out of sight out of mind so to speak.
I'm not desperate just don't want my times wasted. My time is very valuable meaning I am also a single parent I work two full time jobs I just was trying to weed the garden so to speak. Didn't want to be only his emotional life line, I want something real.
Well its Thursday and still nothing from him, lol guess I scared Mr Virgo away
In all honesty I've had my time wasted by so many men who just wanted a chat buddy and not make things real I was worried that this was happening again. He would confuse me by telling me how he wanted to see me all the time and wished I was closer so he could see me how he missed me etc, how he should just stop by unannounced how I was perfect for him but when ever I would ask when we would see each other again his replies where always ?I dunno?. I was afraid that since 4 weeks went by that if we didn't see each other I would have been out of sight out of mind so to speak.
I'm not desperate just don't want my times wasted. My time is very valuable meaning I am also a single parent I work two full time jobs I just was trying to weed the garden so to speak. Didn't want to be only his emotional life line, I want something real.
Well its Thursday and still nothing from him, lol guess I scared Mr Virgo away
On Sunday when I left his place I did call him to apologize if my behavior freaked him out and things seemed normal, he didn't seem upset or anything like that. Now you guys got me contemplating if I should call again to give a more thorough explanation of my behavior. Or would that be pressuring him?
yeah Id disappear for a while and make him wonder here YOU got to...if he's so inclined
You did something on a whim, you didn't realise you'd probably have to analyse the bejeezus out of it later..I wish people were more spontaneous..jeez!..Just leave him to it..so what if he's got a kid inside, not the end of the world..a reasonable human being would've at least invited you in..whatever his reasons, you'll soon find out..Just carry on with your life..Its a chance you took, it just didn't go the way you intended..period.
well update,
its been 5 days since my road trip and haven't heard from him since, realized this morning that he deleted me from his MSN so i guess he took the closest exit.....Road trips and adventures are so over rated
Wonder if i'll ever hear from again, to bad that i will run into him at the race track this yr....did my pride ever take a back seat.....
its been 5 days since my road trip and haven't heard from him since, realized this morning that he deleted me from his MSN so i guess he took the closest exit.....Road trips and adventures are so over rated
Wonder if i'll ever hear from again, to bad that i will run into him at the race track this yr....did my pride ever take a back seat.....
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