Is this Virgo man gone for good or is he analyzing
This topic was created in the Virgo forum by taurus123 on Sunday, May 3, 2009 and has 7 replies.
Perhaps you should date other people?
He's getting on with his life and is well aware of your feelings. He's probably trying to do the right thing by you too as he is busy with his training/competitions. He doesnt want to lose sight of that.
If once thats over and you both still have the same feelings whats to say you cant pick that up? But Id suggest dating other people. You cant sit around for one man hoping when he has made it clear he doesnt want to cross the friendship line. Sometimes friendship is better than a romantic interaction.
Live your life and let him go for now
He's getting on with his life and is well aware of your feelings. He's probably trying to do the right thing by you too as he is busy with his training/competitions. He doesnt want to lose sight of that.
If once thats over and you both still have the same feelings whats to say you cant pick that up? But Id suggest dating other people. You cant sit around for one man hoping when he has made it clear he doesnt want to cross the friendship line. Sometimes friendship is better than a romantic interaction.
Live your life and let him go for now
It isn't uncommon for people who are self-absorbed to be confused about what is going on with other people ....
"I guess he meant this as a polite way of rejecting me. I was heartbroken but did not show it.
However I do not think that I am ugly."
.. and then you proceed to give description of why you don't think you are ugly, as if this has anything to do with why a person isn't into you.
That is very superficial and extremely egotistical on your part, Taurus lady .. that you would view his feelings for you according to your physical attributes. Feelings that a man has for a woman isn't based on whether she wears size 5 or 16, it isn't based on whether she has smooth skin or blemishes, etc .. yet, when you try to figure out why you were rejected by him on an emotional level, you proceeded to say that you can't figure out why and then described how you look on the outside, as if it was a determining factor for how he should feel for you.
The only way for you to figure this out ... is by first removing your ego from the equation, and to realize that if he does/doesn't like you, it will be a matter of how he FEELS for you, and not how you think he should consider your looks. Once you consider his feelings, rather than yourself .. then you'll understand what this means ..
"He said that he cared a lot about our friendship and I need to understand that."
"I guess he meant this as a polite way of rejecting me. I was heartbroken but did not show it.
However I do not think that I am ugly."
.. and then you proceed to give description of why you don't think you are ugly, as if this has anything to do with why a person isn't into you.
That is very superficial and extremely egotistical on your part, Taurus lady .. that you would view his feelings for you according to your physical attributes. Feelings that a man has for a woman isn't based on whether she wears size 5 or 16, it isn't based on whether she has smooth skin or blemishes, etc .. yet, when you try to figure out why you were rejected by him on an emotional level, you proceeded to say that you can't figure out why and then described how you look on the outside, as if it was a determining factor for how he should feel for you.
The only way for you to figure this out ... is by first removing your ego from the equation, and to realize that if he does/doesn't like you, it will be a matter of how he FEELS for you, and not how you think he should consider your looks. Once you consider his feelings, rather than yourself .. then you'll understand what this means ..
"He said that he cared a lot about our friendship and I need to understand that."
"BTW he did not even remember my bday which was at the end of April. I was crushed. He claimed to be a good friend but I cannot tell that I feel the same after that."
What is that ^^^^^^ suppose to mean?
You write this thread, upset to hell about this man .. and then you say that perhaps you don't feel the same for him now since he has forgotten your birthday?
You are crushed?
Seriously .. you need to pull yourself together here. This is just more evidence that you are thinking about yourself, in that he should be all about you .... when he's made it perfectly clear that you two are just friends.
And it's possible that he didn't forget your birthday at all, rather ignored it ... it's possible that it's because of your self-centeredness that he had decided not to pursue a relationship on the level you were hoping for.
I've lived with a Virgo for a very long time ... and I know for a fact that they are appalled at the vanity of other people. Self-confidence, they like. If you present yourself as a woman of conviction, they will adore you ... but, in your case, it just sounds like you are focused on yourself .... your looks, your feelings, your birthday .... and a Virgo might well indeed be appalled by that.
What is that ^^^^^^ suppose to mean?
You write this thread, upset to hell about this man .. and then you say that perhaps you don't feel the same for him now since he has forgotten your birthday?
You are crushed?
Seriously .. you need to pull yourself together here. This is just more evidence that you are thinking about yourself, in that he should be all about you .... when he's made it perfectly clear that you two are just friends.
And it's possible that he didn't forget your birthday at all, rather ignored it ... it's possible that it's because of your self-centeredness that he had decided not to pursue a relationship on the level you were hoping for.
I've lived with a Virgo for a very long time ... and I know for a fact that they are appalled at the vanity of other people. Self-confidence, they like. If you present yourself as a woman of conviction, they will adore you ... but, in your case, it just sounds like you are focused on yourself .... your looks, your feelings, your birthday .... and a Virgo might well indeed be appalled by that.
Hi Angel:
Thank you for your response. I can see your point of view and why you might think that I am a self-centered person. I was more emotionally invested in the friendship than he was. I live with a Virgo mother and she is an amazing person, although very critical to the bone. I do have a lot of self-confidence as I have gone through a lot in my life and was able to pull through all on my own. I think that it is very rude to ignore someone's birthday but I guess that has to do with my upbringing of being respectful towards my friends. Ignorance is not an excuse, but it shows immaturity and inability to deal with whatever the issue is. You said that maybe he did not forget it but he ignored it- I could care less now. I was bitter and I let it all out. As to the ego part, he had so much ego that he technically thought of himself as Jesus. I do not think that I have an ego just because I gave a physical description of myself, which I have never done before. I did not say that I am so beautiful etc etc, all what I said is that I did not think that I was ugly. On the other hand people that know me, always say that I am very humble and that I give more in a friendship than people usually do. I guess his upbringing was different than mine and he has his own way to deal with whatever he is dealing with. On the emotional level, he was not mature enough for me because he could not have a normal conversation about emotions or feelings. I do not like all that emotional butter but if I feel something I would normally say it and move on.
I do care for him though and just because he does not want a relationship, it does not mean that I would think anything less of him. He is a great person for himself.
Thank you for your response. I can see your point of view and why you might think that I am a self-centered person. I was more emotionally invested in the friendship than he was. I live with a Virgo mother and she is an amazing person, although very critical to the bone. I do have a lot of self-confidence as I have gone through a lot in my life and was able to pull through all on my own. I think that it is very rude to ignore someone's birthday but I guess that has to do with my upbringing of being respectful towards my friends. Ignorance is not an excuse, but it shows immaturity and inability to deal with whatever the issue is. You said that maybe he did not forget it but he ignored it- I could care less now. I was bitter and I let it all out. As to the ego part, he had so much ego that he technically thought of himself as Jesus. I do not think that I have an ego just because I gave a physical description of myself, which I have never done before. I did not say that I am so beautiful etc etc, all what I said is that I did not think that I was ugly. On the other hand people that know me, always say that I am very humble and that I give more in a friendship than people usually do. I guess his upbringing was different than mine and he has his own way to deal with whatever he is dealing with. On the emotional level, he was not mature enough for me because he could not have a normal conversation about emotions or feelings. I do not like all that emotional butter but if I feel something I would normally say it and move on.
I do care for him though and just because he does not want a relationship, it does not mean that I would think anything less of him. He is a great person for himself.
Chatz:
Thank you. That is exactly what I am going to do.
Thank you. That is exactly what I am going to do.
Play then ... get burned .... your loss.
You know ... you don't really know what you're talking about, you are simply reacting to emotional stimuli, as with most people in the world when they are faced with a truth.
Because once I pointed out somethign you didn't want to hear, you said in defense of your integrity things to discredit him, and exhalt yourself, such as ....
"I think that it is very rude to ignore someone's birthday but I guess that has to do with my upbringing of being respectful towards my friends."
***** in other words, you are respectful and he isn't due to conditioning of the family unity .. eventhough, he told you straight up .. "He said that he cared a lot about our friendship and I need to understand that."
"Ignorance is not an excuse, but it shows immaturity and inability to deal with whatever the issue is."
**** yet, you came here wanting to know how to get him back in the original OP, while taking a defense posture that he is immature with an inability to deal .. yet, you want him. Perhaps, the confusion is yourself .. as in self-absorbed. Are you saying the man of your dreams that you are waiting for is immature and cannot handle his life-issues?
" ... (he is an athlete). He moved to continue his training on the East Coast.
****** sounds to me from that ^^^^^^ that he is perfectly capable of making just decisions for himself, that are mature and goal oriented for his future's security.
"You said that maybe he did not forget it but he ignored it- I could care less now. I was bitter and I let it all out."
****** of course you care now ... hence: the existence of this thread. Again, you are just reacting to emotional stimuli and floundering with responses that are in contridiction to your intentions.
" .. he had so much ego that he technically thought of himself as Jesus."
****** again, bad-mouthing him, while making a plea to people, asking how you get him.
What is it you want? Do you know?
You have a bad view of him as a person ... and want him.
That doesn't sound like his problem or something he needs to fix .. it sounds like something YOU need to fix in yourself.
You know ... you don't really know what you're talking about, you are simply reacting to emotional stimuli, as with most people in the world when they are faced with a truth.
Because once I pointed out somethign you didn't want to hear, you said in defense of your integrity things to discredit him, and exhalt yourself, such as ....
"I think that it is very rude to ignore someone's birthday but I guess that has to do with my upbringing of being respectful towards my friends."
***** in other words, you are respectful and he isn't due to conditioning of the family unity .. eventhough, he told you straight up .. "He said that he cared a lot about our friendship and I need to understand that."
"Ignorance is not an excuse, but it shows immaturity and inability to deal with whatever the issue is."
**** yet, you came here wanting to know how to get him back in the original OP, while taking a defense posture that he is immature with an inability to deal .. yet, you want him. Perhaps, the confusion is yourself .. as in self-absorbed. Are you saying the man of your dreams that you are waiting for is immature and cannot handle his life-issues?
" ... (he is an athlete). He moved to continue his training on the East Coast.
****** sounds to me from that ^^^^^^ that he is perfectly capable of making just decisions for himself, that are mature and goal oriented for his future's security.
"You said that maybe he did not forget it but he ignored it- I could care less now. I was bitter and I let it all out."
****** of course you care now ... hence: the existence of this thread. Again, you are just reacting to emotional stimuli and floundering with responses that are in contridiction to your intentions.
" .. he had so much ego that he technically thought of himself as Jesus."
****** again, bad-mouthing him, while making a plea to people, asking how you get him.
What is it you want? Do you know?
You have a bad view of him as a person ... and want him.
That doesn't sound like his problem or something he needs to fix .. it sounds like something YOU need to fix in yourself.
"Ignorance is not an excuse, but it shows immaturity and inability to deal with whatever the issue is."
What if the issue is you, and that he thinks you are self-absorbed?
Could he actually approach you with this, and you be honest with yourself about it?
Or would you contridict yourself .. like you did with me when I approach this issue with you?
If you cannot face yourself .. then who is the immature one, with an inability to deal?
Taurus lady .... I didn't say that you said you were beautiful .. I said that you described your physical attributes just after expressing that you cannot understand why you were rejected by this man. That is an indication that you are measuring how you look on the outside as you think should be a determining factor with whether you are rejected or accepted as a person.
I realize that you didn't grasp that ... nor did you grasp that because of that ^^^^ you degrade yourself and devalue yourself as a person because it makes conclusion that your assessed value of yourself is founded on the superficial.
"I did not say that I am so beautiful etc etc, all what I said is that I did not think that I was ugly. On the other hand people that know me, always say that I am very humble and that I give more in a friendship than people usually do."
You thinking you are not ugly is fine, we should all think this .... but, for you to make verbal expression of it, especially to people who cannot even see you .. is screaming insecurity, and not really humble, btw.
What if the issue is you, and that he thinks you are self-absorbed?
Could he actually approach you with this, and you be honest with yourself about it?
Or would you contridict yourself .. like you did with me when I approach this issue with you?
If you cannot face yourself .. then who is the immature one, with an inability to deal?
Taurus lady .... I didn't say that you said you were beautiful .. I said that you described your physical attributes just after expressing that you cannot understand why you were rejected by this man. That is an indication that you are measuring how you look on the outside as you think should be a determining factor with whether you are rejected or accepted as a person.
I realize that you didn't grasp that ... nor did you grasp that because of that ^^^^ you degrade yourself and devalue yourself as a person because it makes conclusion that your assessed value of yourself is founded on the superficial.
"I did not say that I am so beautiful etc etc, all what I said is that I did not think that I was ugly. On the other hand people that know me, always say that I am very humble and that I give more in a friendship than people usually do."
You thinking you are not ugly is fine, we should all think this .... but, for you to make verbal expression of it, especially to people who cannot even see you .. is screaming insecurity, and not really humble, btw.
Leave Your Feedback
We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.
Related Topics
asking a question for everyone...... do all virgos act hot and cold in the beginning of their first relationship
@gypsyqueen
Joined: Jan 12, 2009 · Topics: 3 · Posts: 8
we've only a while to dream. Love is sweet.. but swift as a candle's gleam.... anyway... to a good friend... who r
@FUMRedFairy_tales
Joined: Jan 22, 2009 · Topics: 53 · Posts: 1685
>>>>>>>>>>>>I've posted and lurked here for years, watching many women come here with their aqua man problems. Wonderin
@Scorpiosity
Joined: Jan 16, 2009 · Topics: 10 · Posts: 94
I have read up on scorpio men, but still cannot seem to understand. I have been talking to a scorpio for 1 month 1/2 and
@SINGLE33
Joined: May 03, 2009 · Topics: 1 · Posts: 23
Scorpios are known to be reserved and mysterious and they dont' go putty over compliments/flirtatious girls. They are no
@Versuvius
Joined: Mar 20, 2009 · Topics: 3 · Posts: 89
........abroad being anywhere other than america naturally......... do you attempt to speak the language? do you lik
@Roxanne
Joined: Aug 27, 2008 · Topics: 30 · Posts: 649
(This is from Astro.com - thought I'd share it.) You are Sagittarius Centaurs are mythic figures, half-horse and hal
@brianafay
Joined: Oct 11, 2006 · Topics: 372 · Posts: 30581
Hi, I'm RagingMoon. (Aries/Sun Cancer/Moon)I guess you can say I start fires in and out of bed...(sorry about that I'll
@RagingMoon
Joined: Apr 16, 2009 · Topics: 8 · Posts: 65
here's a cute page on voodoo inspired art: http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6394392
@queriamas814
Joined: Jan 31, 2008 · Topics: 38 · Posts: 74
@virgoking
Joined: Dec 08, 2008 · Topics: 207 · Posts: 2929