The best way to help virgo husband to move on?
This topic was created in the Virgo forum by WitchmitchAries on Friday, June 16, 2017 and has 88 replies.
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i let my virgo husband know that i was not in love with him any more this week. but that i do love and care for him. at first he didnt want to let me go, kept hoping he could change my mind. i soo hated to see him hurt so much. he told me that he knew it was his falt for not listening to me that things were wrong. it was not all him. its a long story how we got to this point. but today he excepted that he needed to let me go. i know that was very hard for him to do. he did it because he didnt want to lose the friendship we have by hanging on to me. i know this is very hard for him. maybe some of you virgos might give me some tips to help him deal with it. or maybe there is nothing more i can do to help him. i am glad he wants to keep the friendship. i am a little lost about how to go about this so it is not harder for him.
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Your situation hits too close to home.
I have no advice. You're better of than I was.
I'm an Aries married to a Virgo... we're on year 22. We were divorced for 4 years - no contact.
Each Virgo is different. But, the egos are the same. Mine has a Cancer Moon so, no getting over it, no friendship.
He won me over by writing me like every 6 mos. for 4 years. I didn't realise it at the time...not until the 4th year. I had moved on. So, 4th year, we started dating and I saw his change.
He did not get over it (Mars Taurus). I was scared that he wouldn't and then angry at each written note.
It was his "fault" so with the ego of perfection and service, he was hell bent on fixing it.
I have no advice. You're better of than I was.
I'm an Aries married to a Virgo... we're on year 22. We were divorced for 4 years - no contact.
Each Virgo is different. But, the egos are the same. Mine has a Cancer Moon so, no getting over it, no friendship.
He won me over by writing me like every 6 mos. for 4 years. I didn't realise it at the time...not until the 4th year. I had moved on. So, 4th year, we started dating and I saw his change.
He did not get over it (Mars Taurus). I was scared that he wouldn't and then angry at each written note.
It was his "fault" so with the ego of perfection and service, he was hell bent on fixing it.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.click to expand
Posted by WitchmitchAriesI think you told me before but I forgot. What's his moon?Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.click to expand
Posted by Ram41626 Gem 8' 6"Posted by WitchmitchAriesI think you told me before but I forgot. What's his moon?Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.click to expand
Posted by WitchmitchAriesi hope he can do the friendship. a little worried it might be to hard for him. but again its because i do can for him. our differences real came to a head this year. for me they did.Posted by Ram41626 Gem 8' 6"Posted by WitchmitchAriesI think you told me before but I forgot. What's his moon?Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.click to expand
Posted by WitchmitchAriesThat's my fatherPosted by Ram41626 Gem 8' 6"Posted by WitchmitchAriesI think you told me before but I forgot. What's his moon?Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.click to expand
@Ram416 i sent you his chart on discord.
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesI saw counseling as an individual choice. He did it by himself.Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.click to expand
While dating, I met his church family. They were so happy to see me. The deacon said, "we're so happy to see you. We're tired of seeing him at the alter." His minister made he and I stand up and she profisized and blessed us in front of everyone - used us as a testimony to others. I thought she was a little presumptious at the time.
Of all the things he shares, he still won't tell me what was wrong with him. I learned what was wrong by this helpful Virgo forum. Folks bumped a thread where a Virgo male described a phase. I think it was a member named LetitBe... back when this place was about astology instead of horoscopes, and had strong outspoken personalities.
Posted by Tom_SawyerCome back to this topic after you were married for decades and say that again.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.click to expand
Posted by VenusAquariusthe counseling was his idea. but he was hoping to save the marrage. he learn that there was no saving it. so he says he is excepting it. i told him that i think the counselor would him to deal with all this. he did like the counselor he picked. i just would like to know if there is something more i can do to help him get through this.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI saw counseling as an individual choice. He did it by himself.Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
While dating, I met his church family. They were so happy to see me. The deacon said, "we're so happy to see you. We're tired of seeing him at the alter." His minister made he and I stand up and she profisized and blessed us in front of everyone - used us as a testimony to others. I thought she was a little presumptious at the time.
Of all the things he shares, he still won't tell me what was wrong with him. I learned what was wrong by this helpful Virgo forum. Folks bumped a thread where a Virgo male described a phase. I think it was a member named LetitBe... back when this place was about astology instead of horoscopes, and had strong outspoken personalities.click to expand
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesPerhaps keep an open mind?Posted by VenusAquariusthe counseling was his idea. but he was hoping to save the marrage. he learn that there was no saving it. so he says he is excepting it. i told him that i think the counselor would him to deal with all this. he did like the counselor he picked. i just would like to know if there is something more i can do to help him get through this.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI saw counseling as an individual choice. He did it by himself.Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
While dating, I met his church family. They were so happy to see me. The deacon said, "we're so happy to see you. We're tired of seeing him at the alter." His minister made he and I stand up and she profisized and blessed us in front of everyone - used us as a testimony to others. I thought she was a little presumptious at the time.
Of all the things he shares, he still won't tell me what was wrong with him. I learned what was wrong by this helpful Virgo forum. Folks bumped a thread where a Virgo male described a phase. I think it was a member named LetitBe... back when this place was about astology instead of horoscopes, and had strong outspoken personalities.click to expand
Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.click to expand
i will say this, when it comes to my virgo husband i dont bull shit around. he needs help and i need to know how best to help him.
Posted by VenusAquariushe asked me that too. i told him that i could do that. but i real worry about giving him false hope.Posted by WitchmitchAriesPerhaps, keep an open mind?Posted by VenusAquariusthe counseling was his idea. but he was hoping to save the marrage. he learn that there was no saving it. so he says he is excepting it. i told him that i think the counselor would him to deal with all this. he did like the counselor he picked. i just would like to know if there is something more i can do to help him get through this.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI saw counseling as an individual choice. He did it by himself.Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
While dating, I met his church family. They were so happy to see me. The deacon said, "we're so happy to see you. We're tired of seeing him at the alter." His minister made he and I stand up and she profisized and blessed us in front of everyone - used us as a testimony to others. I thought she was a little presumptious at the time.
Of all the things he shares, he still won't tell me what was wrong with him. I learned what was wrong by this helpful Virgo forum. Folks bumped a thread where a Virgo male described a phase. I think it was a member named LetitBe... back when this place was about astology instead of horoscopes, and had strong outspoken personalities.click to expand
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesDon't worry about false hopes.... of all things to worry about. You spent 29... you owe it to yourself as well.Posted by VenusAquariushe asked me that too. i told him that i could do that. but i real worry about giving him false hope.Posted by WitchmitchAriesPerhaps, keep an open mind?Posted by VenusAquariusthe counseling was his idea. but he was hoping to save the marrage. he learn that there was no saving it. so he says he is excepting it. i told him that i think the counselor would him to deal with all this. he did like the counselor he picked. i just would like to know if there is something more i can do to help him get through this.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI saw counseling as an individual choice. He did it by himself.Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
While dating, I met his church family. They were so happy to see me. The deacon said, "we're so happy to see you. We're tired of seeing him at the alter." His minister made he and I stand up and she profisized and blessed us in front of everyone - used us as a testimony to others. I thought she was a little presumptious at the time.
Of all the things he shares, he still won't tell me what was wrong with him. I learned what was wrong by this helpful Virgo forum. Folks bumped a thread where a Virgo male described a phase. I think it was a member named LetitBe... back when this place was about astology instead of horoscopes, and had strong outspoken personalities.click to expand
Your Virgo is more rational, more mutable than mine. Mine is all or nothing. So, I had no choice but divorce. I tried to separate but, he wasn't having it. He was loosing his shit.
Posted by VenusAquariusi do have to say he has been handling it way better then i thought he would. i just hate seeing him in soo much pain. but it just got to the point that i just couldnt get thoughs old feelings for him back. i tried this year. but my mind said it aint happening so deal with it. so thats when i told him.Posted by WitchmitchAriesDon't worry about false hopes.... of all things to worry about. You spent 29... you owe it to yourself as well.Posted by VenusAquariushe asked me that too. i told him that i could do that. but i real worry about giving him false hope.Posted by WitchmitchAriesPerhaps, keep an open mind?Posted by VenusAquariusthe counseling was his idea. but he was hoping to save the marrage. he learn that there was no saving it. so he says he is excepting it. i told him that i think the counselor would him to deal with all this. he did like the counselor he picked. i just would like to know if there is something more i can do to help him get through this.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI saw counseling as an individual choice. He did it by himself.Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
While dating, I met his church family. They were so happy to see me. The deacon said, "we're so happy to see you. We're tired of seeing him at the alter." His minister made he and I stand up and she profisized and blessed us in front of everyone - used us as a testimony to others. I thought she was a little presumptious at the time.
Of all the things he shares, he still won't tell me what was wrong with him. I learned what was wrong by this helpful Virgo forum. Folks bumped a thread where a Virgo male described a phase. I think it was a member named LetitBe... back when this place was about astology instead of horoscopes, and had strong outspoken personalities.
Your Virgo is more rational, more mutable than mine. Mine is all or nothing. So, I had no choice but divorce. I tried to separate but, he wasn't having it. He was loosing his shit.click to expand
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesAnd, I know what you mean by doing "it his way." But, I take responsibility for my choice to do so. So, that wasn't a problem or, the problem for us. If it was a problem, I would just do things my way.Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.click to expand
Posted by Tom_Sawyeryou still have not answered my question. also you should really think about if you want to go there. because i will and you will look like a real ass. first you dont answer question with question. if your a young buck with a broken heart this is so not a place you want to go. far warning.Posted by WitchmitchAriesYou defend yourself too much for a sincere person.Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.
Did it take you 29 years to break him?
Was he always a simp like this?
Or was he actually a man at some pointclick to expand
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesBut, you didn't let him help you with it? Let him take over that part. Tell him more explicitedly so that he can try.Posted by VenusAquariusi do have to say he has been handling it way better then i thought he would. i just hate seeing him in soo much pain. but it just got to the point that i just couldnt get thoughs old feelings for him back. i tried this year. but my mind said it aint happening so deal with it. so thats when i told him.Posted by WitchmitchAriesDon't worry about false hopes.... of all things to worry about. You spent 29... you owe it to yourself as well.Posted by VenusAquariushe asked me that too. i told him that i could do that. but i real worry about giving him false hope.Posted by WitchmitchAriesPerhaps, keep an open mind?Posted by VenusAquariusthe counseling was his idea. but he was hoping to save the marrage. he learn that there was no saving it. so he says he is excepting it. i told him that i think the counselor would him to deal with all this. he did like the counselor he picked. i just would like to know if there is something more i can do to help him get through this.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI saw counseling as an individual choice. He did it by himself.Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
While dating, I met his church family. They were so happy to see me. The deacon said, "we're so happy to see you. We're tired of seeing him at the alter." His minister made he and I stand up and she profisized and blessed us in front of everyone - used us as a testimony to others. I thought she was a little presumptious at the time.
Of all the things he shares, he still won't tell me what was wrong with him. I learned what was wrong by this helpful Virgo forum. Folks bumped a thread where a Virgo male described a phase. I think it was a member named LetitBe... back when this place was about astology instead of horoscopes, and had strong outspoken personalities.
Your Virgo is more rational, more mutable than mine. Mine is all or nothing. So, I had no choice but divorce. I tried to separate but, he wasn't having it. He was loosing his shit.click to expand
What else, what better, do have to do that you can't do this?
I got the feeling from your posts on your marriage and other posts, that you feel unfulfilled.
Posted by VenusAquariusi am a fixer. he bitched about anything i fixed it. i even quit college for him. i have even put my health like doctor appointment on hold so i could fix what up set him. when i car about someone i put myself to the side and just suck it up and do what i could for the person i love. but my health can handle that no more and my mind says its soo done. the only way for my to take care of me is to be on my own. he says he understands thats but he is in pain. he said he knows i have always been there for him and he understands that i need to go.Posted by WitchmitchAriesAnd, I know what you mean by doing "it his way." But, I take responsibility for my choice to do so. So, that wasn't a problem or, the problem for us. If it was a problem, I would just do things my way.Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.click to expand
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesI understand.Posted by VenusAquariusi am a fixer. he bitched about anything i fixed it. i even quit college for him. i have even put my health like doctor appointment on hold so i could fix what up set him. when i car about someone i put myself to the side and just suck it up and do what i could for the person i love. but my health can handle that no more and my mind says its soo done. the only way for my to take care of me is to be on my own. he says he understands thats but he is in pain. he said he knows i have always been there for him and he understands that i need to go.Posted by WitchmitchAriesAnd, I know what you mean by doing "it his way." But, I take responsibility for my choice to do so. So, that wasn't a problem or, the problem for us. If it was a problem, I would just do things my way.Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.click to expand
And, while trying to explain the health thing, they turn around and talk about their pain.
We have to teach people how to treat us. They think everythings okay. I feel like for men, posession really is 9/10 of the law. It seems they only listen when you're walking out the door. By then, you need a couple of years break.
Re - teach him how to love you. Start a list of all the things you need in priority.
Signed Up: Jan 30, 2017
Comments: 4555 · Posts: 7614 · Topics: 100
Comments: 4555 · Posts: 7614 · Topics: 100
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by WitchmitchAriesBut, you didn't let him help you with it? Let him take over that part. Tell him more explicitedly so that he can try.Posted by VenusAquariusi do have to say he has been handling it way better then i thought he would. i just hate seeing him in soo much pain. but it just got to the point that i just couldnt get thoughs old feelings for him back. i tried this year. but my mind said it aint happening so deal with it. so thats when i told him.Posted by WitchmitchAriesDon't worry about false hopes.... of all things to worry about. You spent 29... you owe it to yourself as well.Posted by VenusAquariushe asked me that too. i told him that i could do that. but i real worry about giving him false hope.Posted by WitchmitchAriesPerhaps, keep an open mind?Posted by VenusAquariusthe counseling was his idea. but he was hoping to save the marrage. he learn that there was no saving it. so he says he is excepting it. i told him that i think the counselor would him to deal with all this. he did like the counselor he picked. i just would like to know if there is something more i can do to help him get through this.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI saw counseling as an individual choice. He did it by himself.Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
While dating, I met his church family. They were so happy to see me. The deacon said, "we're so happy to see you. We're tired of seeing him at the alter." His minister made he and I stand up and she profisized and blessed us in front of everyone - used us as a testimony to others. I thought she was a little presumptious at the time.
Of all the things he shares, he still won't tell me what was wrong with him. I learned what was wrong by this helpful Virgo forum. Folks bumped a thread where a Virgo male described a phase. I think it was a member named LetitBe... back when this place was about astology instead of horoscopes, and had strong outspoken personalities.
Your Virgo is more rational, more mutable than mine. Mine is all or nothing. So, I had no choice but divorce. I tried to separate but, he wasn't having it. He was loosing his shit.
What else, what better, do have to do that you can't do this?
I got the feeling from your posts on your marriage and other posts, that you feel unfulfilled.click to expand
i have been telling him for years what was going on with me. he wouldnt listen. he knows i tried to warn him that i was hitting my braking point. i have dreams and for the first time in my life i am putting me first. i soo dont want any relationship. i dont want to be in any commitment. i am soo ok with that. but other act like there is something wrong with me for not wanting to be in love with no one. my commitment right now is to my dreams and myself.
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesThey don't listen until you're walking out the door.Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by WitchmitchAriesBut, you didn't let him help you with it? Let him take over that part. Tell him more explicitedly so that he can try.Posted by VenusAquariusi do have to say he has been handling it way better then i thought he would. i just hate seeing him in soo much pain. but it just got to the point that i just couldnt get thoughs old feelings for him back. i tried this year. but my mind said it aint happening so deal with it. so thats when i told him.Posted by WitchmitchAriesDon't worry about false hopes.... of all things to worry about. You spent 29... you owe it to yourself as well.Posted by VenusAquariushe asked me that too. i told him that i could do that. but i real worry about giving him false hope.Posted by WitchmitchAriesPerhaps, keep an open mind?Posted by VenusAquariusthe counseling was his idea. but he was hoping to save the marrage. he learn that there was no saving it. so he says he is excepting it. i told him that i think the counselor would him to deal with all this. he did like the counselor he picked. i just would like to know if there is something more i can do to help him get through this.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI saw counseling as an individual choice. He did it by himself.Posted by VenusAquariusi got my virgo in counseling. we went today to help him. he said he would keep going. he said he didnt want to lose the friendship too.Posted by DamnataAbsolutely Damnata. Mine lost, weight, went a little cra, made the situation worse at first... He told me all about his thoughts and torments...most too dark to share (yes, even for DXP) but, he even vowed celibacy for life.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
While dating, I met his church family. They were so happy to see me. The deacon said, "we're so happy to see you. We're tired of seeing him at the alter." His minister made he and I stand up and she profisized and blessed us in front of everyone - used us as a testimony to others. I thought she was a little presumptious at the time.
Of all the things he shares, he still won't tell me what was wrong with him. I learned what was wrong by this helpful Virgo forum. Folks bumped a thread where a Virgo male described a phase. I think it was a member named LetitBe... back when this place was about astology instead of horoscopes, and had strong outspoken personalities.
Your Virgo is more rational, more mutable than mine. Mine is all or nothing. So, I had no choice but divorce. I tried to separate but, he wasn't having it. He was loosing his shit.
What else, what better, do have to do that you can't do this?
I got the feeling from your posts on your marriage and other posts, that you feel unfulfilled.
i have been telling him for years what was going on with me. he wouldnt listen. he knows i tried to warn him that i was hitting my braking point. i have dreams and for the first time in my life i am putting me first. i soo dont want any relationship. i dont want to be in any commitment. i am soo ok with that. but other act like there is something wrong with me for not wanting to be in love with no one. my commitment right now is to my dreams and myself.click to expand
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowI felt thesame way... break camp... but, only because mine was loosing his shit. If mine acted like hers, I would've done differently... counseling, separation...
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by WitchmitchAriesI understand.Posted by VenusAquariusi am a fixer. he bitched about anything i fixed it. i even quit college for him. i have even put my health like doctor appointment on hold so i could fix what up set him. when i car about someone i put myself to the side and just suck it up and do what i could for the person i love. but my health can handle that no more and my mind says its soo done. the only way for my to take care of me is to be on my own. he says he understands thats but he is in pain. he said he knows i have always been there for him and he understands that i need to go.Posted by WitchmitchAriesAnd, I know what you mean by doing "it his way." But, I take responsibility for my choice to do so. So, that wasn't a problem or, the problem for us. If it was a problem, I would just do things my way.Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.
And, while trying to explain the health thing, they turn around and talk about their pain.
We have to teach people how to treat us. They think everythings okay. I feel like for men, posession really is 9/10 of the law. It seems they only listen when you're walking out the door. By then, you need a couple of years break.
Re - teach him how to love you. Start a list of all the things you need in priority.click to expand
i cant go there. i dont want to teach him no more. i have dont that. aries here, i say whats on my mind and i am straight to the point of what i need. lol i just want to help him move on.
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowthank you. he did take off his ring today. i hope thats a good sign. he says know we still be friends helps him. but i know he can fool himself at times. the one problem we faces is that we have to live together for a while to get things like the house and other stuff taken care of. i have no place to go. i was wondering if he might be stalling. lol he does that at times. it drove me crazy. lol put he says his eyes are so open now and he wants to kick himself for not listening to me. he can be soo hard on himself about things.
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
You don't necessarily to do this cause I'm sure he will another woman by himself for a greater love and greater change but since you want to help him, introduce him to your female friends or at least him help him find another woman.
Do it. He'll smile and thank you later.
Do it. He'll smile and thank you later.
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesBe careful.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowthank you. he did take off his ring today. i hope thats a good sign. he says know we still be friends helps him. but i know he can fool himself at times. the one problem we faces is that we have to live together for a while to get things like the house and other stuff taken care of. i have no place to go. i was wondering if he might be stalling. lol he does that at times. it drove me crazy. lol put he says his eyes are so open now and he wants to kick himself for not listening to me. he can be soo hard on himself about things.
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.click to expand
Posted by Nathan912rebound relationships can be tricky. but i have thought that he really needed friends. that would be more helpful. but i do like your tip. thank you.
You don't necessarily to do this cause I'm sure he will another woman by himself for a greater love and greater change but since you want to help him, introduce him to your female friends or at least him help him find another woman.
Do it. He'll smile and thank you later.
Signed Up: Jan 30, 2017
Comments: 4555 · Posts: 7614 · Topics: 100
Comments: 4555 · Posts: 7614 · Topics: 100
Posted by WitchmitchAriesI don't think it's sunk in yet. The mind can play real cruel tricks.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowthank you. he did take off his ring today. i hope thats a good sign. he says know we still be friends helps him. but i know he can fool himself at times. the one problem we faces is that we have to live together for a while to get things like the house and other stuff taken care of. i have no place to go. i was wondering if he might be stalling. lol he does that at times. it drove me crazy. lol put he says his eyes are so open now and he wants to kick himself for not listening to me. he can be soo hard on himself about things.
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.click to expand
Our relationship thawed over time as I started becoming resentful towards Chris, but at the same time it felt like this was just a phase and that he'd come to his senses about making a decision. It was an extremely mentally draining time for me. But I'm very stubborn and I snapped myself out of it long enough to make Chris' decision for him.
But it fucked me up real good. Lowered my self worth almost to the ground, and forget about confidence. I felt like I gave him everything I had in me, and it still wasn't good enough for him. That's still a problem I have with Jed too, like I'm actually dreaming and I'll wake up and the last 3-4 months never happened. I have to keep reminding myself that Jed is a better man than Chris, and a more appreciative man. Both Virgos, yet so different.
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowmy virgo told me today that he is letting me go because he loves me. he said he thinks if he hanges on to me that i will come to hate him and he doesnt want that. he knows that i really tired and he could kick himself for not listening sooner. this is what he told me today. i have always had his and have taken care of anything that he was bitching about. i didnt to the point that i got lost in the relationship and he says he knows this and understand that i need to go. he is a very strong man, but i cant help but worry about him. but i always worried about him. he is still me friend. i do know he doesnt handle change very well. guess we will see.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI don't think it's sunk in yet. The mind can play real cruel tricks.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowthank you. he did take off his ring today. i hope thats a good sign. he says know we still be friends helps him. but i know he can fool himself at times. the one problem we faces is that we have to live together for a while to get things like the house and other stuff taken care of. i have no place to go. i was wondering if he might be stalling. lol he does that at times. it drove me crazy. lol put he says his eyes are so open now and he wants to kick himself for not listening to me. he can be soo hard on himself about things.
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
Our relationship thawed over time as I started becoming resentful towards Chris, but at the same time it felt like this was just a phase and that he'd come to his senses about making a decision. It was an extremely mentally draining time for me. But I'm very stubborn and I snapped myself out of it long enough to make Chris' decision for him.
But it fucked me up real good. Lowered my self worth almost to the ground, and forget about confidence. I felt like I gave him everything I had in me, and it still wasn't good enough for him. That's still a problem I have with Jed too, like I'm actually dreaming and I'll wake up and the last 3-4 months never happened. I have to keep reminding myself that Jed is a better man than Chris, and a more appreciative man. Both Virgos, yet so different.click to expand
Posted by DamnataIf i had a dollar for every time I said this - I would be rich!Posted by Tom_SawyerCome back to this topic after you were married for decades and say that again.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.click to expand
People just don't hermit because they are too young...well...
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesThere you go... a fixer.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowmy virgo told me today that he is letting me go because he loves me. he said he thinks if he hanges on to me that i will come to hate him and he doesnt want that. he knows that i really tired and he could kick himself for not listening sooner. this is what he told me today. i have always had his and have taken care of anything that he was bitching about. i didnt to the point that i got lost in the relationship and he says he knows this and understand that i need to go. he is a very strong man, but i cant help but worry about him. but i always worried about him. he is still me friend. i do know he doesnt handle change very well. guess we will see.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI don't think it's sunk in yet. The mind can play real cruel tricks.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowthank you. he did take off his ring today. i hope thats a good sign. he says know we still be friends helps him. but i know he can fool himself at times. the one problem we faces is that we have to live together for a while to get things like the house and other stuff taken care of. i have no place to go. i was wondering if he might be stalling. lol he does that at times. it drove me crazy. lol put he says his eyes are so open now and he wants to kick himself for not listening to me. he can be soo hard on himself about things.
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
Our relationship thawed over time as I started becoming resentful towards Chris, but at the same time it felt like this was just a phase and that he'd come to his senses about making a decision. It was an extremely mentally draining time for me. But I'm very stubborn and I snapped myself out of it long enough to make Chris' decision for him.
But it fucked me up real good. Lowered my self worth almost to the ground, and forget about confidence. I felt like I gave him everything I had in me, and it still wasn't good enough for him. That's still a problem I have with Jed too, like I'm actually dreaming and I'll wake up and the last 3-4 months never happened. I have to keep reminding myself that Jed is a better man than Chris, and a more appreciative man. Both Virgos, yet so different.click to expand
Think about this....
You have no place to go but, worried about helping your husband's transition.
Think about this and how this has contributed to your marriage.
Posted by Tom_Sawyerwow you have got me pinned. you should be proud. one thing my husband is way stronger then thatPosted by WitchmitchAriesI'm not worried about you, i'm more interested in your methods of breaking him.Posted by Tom_Sawyeryou still have not answered my question. also you should really think about if you want to go there. because i will and you will look like a real ass. first you dont answer question with question. if your a young buck with a broken heart this is so not a place you want to go. far warning.Posted by WitchmitchAriesYou defend yourself too much for a sincere person.Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.
Did it take you 29 years to break him?
Was he always a simp like this?
Or was he actually a man at some point
You were together for 29 years,so I'm guessing your man was out of your league when you met him.
- "At first he didn't want to let me go-kept hoping he could change my mind" - Okay...
- "I so hated to see him hurt" - Uh'huh
- "He told me he KNEW it has HIS fault for not listening to ME when I told him things were wrong" - I can only imagine how hard you tried telling him that.
- "It was not ALL him" - so far so good.
- "Bs about how hard it was to let me go and he values our friendship so much, this is very hard for him" - Nothing out of the ordinary here either.
- "Maybe you Virgos can enlighten me on how I can HELP him some more? or did I mentally castrate him already? Ups."
- "I'm glad he's still blind and can't see the situation I've created for him and wants to honor our friendshit"
- "I took him to counselling" - That is nice to hear
- "I'm a little lost on how to heal him" - ofcourse you are, everyone can break, a few can fix.
Tell me again how you're not full of shit?click to expand
Posted by WitchmitchAriesYou killed me! You did what?
i let my virgo husband know that i was not in love with him any more this week. but that i do love and care for him. at first he didnt want to let me go, kept hoping he could change my mind. i soo hated to see him hurt so much. he told me that he knew it was his falt for not listening to me that things were wrong. it was not all him. its a long story how we got to this point. but today he excepted that he needed to let me go. i know that was very hard for him to do. he did it because he didnt want to lose the friendship we have by hanging on to me. i know this is very hard for him. maybe some of you virgos might give me some tips to help him deal with it. or maybe there is nothing more i can do to help him. i am glad he wants to keep the friendship. i am a little lost about how to go about this so it is not harder for him.
I am exxersizing it for a year but can't!
It's such a huge step!
I am not aware of your cituation. How long was a marriage?
Posted by WitchmitchAriesThey don't think! They just type. Ok in their eyes you pulling butter. Who cares?Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.click to expand
29 years??? Omg! Do you love someone else? Or you moving into nowhere with no one?
Posted by VenusAquariusyour right thank youPosted by WitchmitchAriesThere you go... a fixer.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowmy virgo told me today that he is letting me go because he loves me. he said he thinks if he hanges on to me that i will come to hate him and he doesnt want that. he knows that i really tired and he could kick himself for not listening sooner. this is what he told me today. i have always had his and have taken care of anything that he was bitching about. i didnt to the point that i got lost in the relationship and he says he knows this and understand that i need to go. he is a very strong man, but i cant help but worry about him. but i always worried about him. he is still me friend. i do know he doesnt handle change very well. guess we will see.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI don't think it's sunk in yet. The mind can play real cruel tricks.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowthank you. he did take off his ring today. i hope thats a good sign. he says know we still be friends helps him. but i know he can fool himself at times. the one problem we faces is that we have to live together for a while to get things like the house and other stuff taken care of. i have no place to go. i was wondering if he might be stalling. lol he does that at times. it drove me crazy. lol put he says his eyes are so open now and he wants to kick himself for not listening to me. he can be soo hard on himself about things.
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
Our relationship thawed over time as I started becoming resentful towards Chris, but at the same time it felt like this was just a phase and that he'd come to his senses about making a decision. It was an extremely mentally draining time for me. But I'm very stubborn and I snapped myself out of it long enough to make Chris' decision for him.
But it fucked me up real good. Lowered my self worth almost to the ground, and forget about confidence. I felt like I gave him everything I had in me, and it still wasn't good enough for him. That's still a problem I have with Jed too, like I'm actually dreaming and I'll wake up and the last 3-4 months never happened. I have to keep reminding myself that Jed is a better man than Chris, and a more appreciative man. Both Virgos, yet so different.
Think about this....
You have no place to go but, worried helping your husband's transition.
Think about this and how this has contributed to your marriage.click to expand
Posted by Gemitatino not in love with anyone. dont want to be in love with anyone. i fell out of love with him.Posted by WitchmitchAriesThey don't think! They just type. Ok in their eyes you pulling butter. Who cares?Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.
29 years??? Omg! Do you love someone else? Or you moving into nowhere with no one?click to expand
Posted by WitchmitchAries
but it just got to the point that i just couldnt get thoughs old feelings for him back. i tried this year. but my mind said it aint happening so deal with it. so thats when i told him.
You make the implication here that you've known for some time that your feelings for him were gone, but, you never told him. You even said, "this year", which means it's been years you've been pretending with him.
You seem to be acting like he's a helpless child, and here you are to come and rescue him ... when in reality, you've been stringing him along for years, allowing him to believe you still wanted him.
You are manipulating this situation, and that is clear as day.
Posted by VenusAquariusI was trying to teach my husband how to love me and be a man. Then I moved out to another room. Keeping cooling, being nice. Occasionally flying off handles and giving him the truth. He is playing 'why you never said so'? What??? I had said it 100 times. He chooses to play dumb or honestly tunes himself out.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI understand.Posted by VenusAquariusi am a fixer. he bitched about anything i fixed it. i even quit college for him. i have even put my health like doctor appointment on hold so i could fix what up set him. when i car about someone i put myself to the side and just suck it up and do what i could for the person i love. but my health can handle that no more and my mind says its soo done. the only way for my to take care of me is to be on my own. he says he understands thats but he is in pain. he said he knows i have always been there for him and he understands that i need to go.Posted by WitchmitchAriesAnd, I know what you mean by doing "it his way." But, I take responsibility for my choice to do so. So, that wasn't a problem or, the problem for us. If it was a problem, I would just do things my way.Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.
And, while trying to explain the health thing, they turn around and talk about their pain.
We have to teach people how to treat us. They think everythings okay. I feel like for men, posession really is 9/10 of the law. It seems they only listen when you're walking out the door. By then, you need a couple of years break.
Re - teach him how to love you. Start a list of all the things you need in priority.click to expand
So when I am ready to walk - he is going to imitate heart attack...I know it'
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowThere is FB!
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by WitchmitchAriesI don't think you've fallen out of love with your husband as much as you haven fallen out of love with yourself. You lost yourself or, being who you are (paricularly in this marriage) is no longer fulfilling.Posted by VenusAquariusyour right thank youPosted by WitchmitchAriesThere you go... a fixer.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowmy virgo told me today that he is letting me go because he loves me. he said he thinks if he hanges on to me that i will come to hate him and he doesnt want that. he knows that i really tired and he could kick himself for not listening sooner. this is what he told me today. i have always had his and have taken care of anything that he was bitching about. i didnt to the point that i got lost in the relationship and he says he knows this and understand that i need to go. he is a very strong man, but i cant help but worry about him. but i always worried about him. he is still me friend. i do know he doesnt handle change very well. guess we will see.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI don't think it's sunk in yet. The mind can play real cruel tricks.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowthank you. he did take off his ring today. i hope thats a good sign. he says know we still be friends helps him. but i know he can fool himself at times. the one problem we faces is that we have to live together for a while to get things like the house and other stuff taken care of. i have no place to go. i was wondering if he might be stalling. lol he does that at times. it drove me crazy. lol put he says his eyes are so open now and he wants to kick himself for not listening to me. he can be soo hard on himself about things.
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
Our relationship thawed over time as I started becoming resentful towards Chris, but at the same time it felt like this was just a phase and that he'd come to his senses about making a decision. It was an extremely mentally draining time for me. But I'm very stubborn and I snapped myself out of it long enough to make Chris' decision for him.
But it fucked me up real good. Lowered my self worth almost to the ground, and forget about confidence. I felt like I gave him everything I had in me, and it still wasn't good enough for him. That's still a problem I have with Jed too, like I'm actually dreaming and I'll wake up and the last 3-4 months never happened. I have to keep reminding myself that Jed is a better man than Chris, and a more appreciative man. Both Virgos, yet so different.
Think about this....
You have no place to go but, worried helping your husband's transition.
Think about this and how this has contributed to your marriage.click to expand
Counseling might help you both.
Signed Up: Jan 27, 2012
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Comments: 4343 · Posts: 13269 · Topics: 69
Posted by GemitatiThey don't listen until you walk out the door.Posted by VenusAquariusI was trying to teach my husband how to love me and be a man. Then I moved out to another room. Keeping cooling, being nice. Occasionally flying off handles and giving him the truth. He is playing 'why you never said so'? What??? I had said it 100 times. He chooses to play dumb or honestly tunes himself out.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI understand.Posted by VenusAquariusi am a fixer. he bitched about anything i fixed it. i even quit college for him. i have even put my health like doctor appointment on hold so i could fix what up set him. when i car about someone i put myself to the side and just suck it up and do what i could for the person i love. but my health can handle that no more and my mind says its soo done. the only way for my to take care of me is to be on my own. he says he understands thats but he is in pain. he said he knows i have always been there for him and he understands that i need to go.Posted by WitchmitchAriesAnd, I know what you mean by doing "it his way." But, I take responsibility for my choice to do so. So, that wasn't a problem or, the problem for us. If it was a problem, I would just do things my way.Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.
And, while trying to explain the health thing, they turn around and talk about their pain.
We have to teach people how to treat us. They think everythings okay. I feel like for men, posession really is 9/10 of the law. It seems they only listen when you're walking out the door. By then, you need a couple of years break.
Re - teach him how to love you. Start a list of all the things you need in priority.
So when I am ready to walk - he is going to imitate heart attack...I know it'click to expand
Posted by VenusAquariusi did loose myself. then has i started to find myself again thats when i started to fall out of love with him.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI don't think you've fallen out of love with your husband as much as you haven fallen out of love with yourself. You lost yourself or, being who you are (paricularly in this marriage) is no longer fulfilling.Posted by VenusAquariusyour right thank youPosted by WitchmitchAriesThere you go... a fixer.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowmy virgo told me today that he is letting me go because he loves me. he said he thinks if he hanges on to me that i will come to hate him and he doesnt want that. he knows that i really tired and he could kick himself for not listening sooner. this is what he told me today. i have always had his and have taken care of anything that he was bitching about. i didnt to the point that i got lost in the relationship and he says he knows this and understand that i need to go. he is a very strong man, but i cant help but worry about him. but i always worried about him. he is still me friend. i do know he doesnt handle change very well. guess we will see.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI don't think it's sunk in yet. The mind can play real cruel tricks.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowthank you. he did take off his ring today. i hope thats a good sign. he says know we still be friends helps him. but i know he can fool himself at times. the one problem we faces is that we have to live together for a while to get things like the house and other stuff taken care of. i have no place to go. i was wondering if he might be stalling. lol he does that at times. it drove me crazy. lol put he says his eyes are so open now and he wants to kick himself for not listening to me. he can be soo hard on himself about things.
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.
Our relationship thawed over time as I started becoming resentful towards Chris, but at the same time it felt like this was just a phase and that he'd come to his senses about making a decision. It was an extremely mentally draining time for me. But I'm very stubborn and I snapped myself out of it long enough to make Chris' decision for him.
But it fucked me up real good. Lowered my self worth almost to the ground, and forget about confidence. I felt like I gave him everything I had in me, and it still wasn't good enough for him. That's still a problem I have with Jed too, like I'm actually dreaming and I'll wake up and the last 3-4 months never happened. I have to keep reminding myself that Jed is a better man than Chris, and a more appreciative man. Both Virgos, yet so different.
Think about this....
You have no place to go but, worried helping your husband's transition.
Think about this and how this has contributed to your marriage.
Counseling might help you both.click to expand
Posted by WitchmitchAriesBecause none of us wants to leave the house I am keeping shut. I did tell h more than once I will divorce him. Like a water off duck back.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowthank you. he did take off his ring today. i hope thats a good sign. he says know we still be friends helps him. but i know he can fool himself at times. the one problem we faces is that we have to live together for a while to get things like the house and other stuff taken care of. i have no place to go. i was wondering if he might be stalling. lol he does that at times. it drove me crazy. lol put he says his eyes are so open now and he wants to kick himself for not listening to me. he can be soo hard on himself about things.
Yikes. Even with just a Virgo moon, leaving my ex really fucked me up for a very long time. He faces a long dark road and I don't wish it upon anyone.
Unfortunately, I think having you around even as a friend will do more damage than good. I don't believe he's accepted the marriage is over, I think he thinks there's still a slim chance. I think this is him stalling.
He needs to get used to the idea of you not in his life, and you can only help him with distance. Even photos of you should go.click to expand
If I will be ready to walk - he will be like 'why? What happened?'
Wtf! Are you serious man???
Posted by Tom_Sawyermore of a man then you. thats for sure.Posted by WitchmitchAriesI know right, he's a real superman at the moment?Posted by Tom_Sawyerwow you have got me pinned. you should be proud. one thing my husband is way stronger then thatPosted by WitchmitchAriesI'm not worried about you, i'm more interested in your methods of breaking him.Posted by Tom_Sawyeryou still have not answered my question. also you should really think about if you want to go there. because i will and you will look like a real ass. first you dont answer question with question. if your a young buck with a broken heart this is so not a place you want to go. far warning.Posted by WitchmitchAriesYou defend yourself too much for a sincere person.Posted by Tom_Sawyeri am not pulling any shit. i fell out of love with him. it does happen. where did you get the idea that i was pulling shit? i have been by this mans side and did it all his way for 29 years. 29. there is no bull shit here. i care about him and love him but not in love with him. please tell me what shit i am pulling? i really want to know you would think that.Posted by DamnataHe will get over her once he fully realizes the shit she's pulling.
Waiting for this topic to fill up with BS Virgo answers to the tune of "Oh he will get over it".
He won't get over it. Virgo does not get over it. Relationships are one thing...marriage is another.
If he loved you deeply, it's all downhill now for his health on all levels you can imagine: mental, emotional, etc.
Pls don't take this the wrong way, it's not a guilt trip by any means and you have to do what is right by yourself but if the question is how to help to move on..he won't move on.
Only thing you can do is be caring and keep an observant eye out for his behavior/patterns.
I'm not buying it.
Did it take you 29 years to break him?
Was he always a simp like this?
Or was he actually a man at some point
You were together for 29 years,so I'm guessing your man was out of your league when you met him.
- "At first he didn't want to let me go-kept hoping he could change my mind" - Okay...
- "I so hated to see him hurt" - Uh'huh
- "He told me he KNEW it has HIS fault for not listening to ME when I told him things were wrong" - I can only imagine how hard you tried telling him that.
- "It was not ALL him" - so far so good.
- "Bs about how hard it was to let me go and he values our friendship so much, this is very hard for him" - Nothing out of the ordinary here either.
- "Maybe you Virgos can enlighten me on how I can HELP him some more? or did I mentally castrate him already? Ups."
- "I'm glad he's still blind and can't see the situation I've created for him and wants to honor our friendshit"
- "I took him to counselling" - That is nice to hear
- "I'm a little lost on how to heal him" - ofcourse you are, everyone can break, a few can fix.
Tell me again how you're not full of shit?click to expand
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