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Nov 25, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 162 · Topics: 17
How do Virgos act when they are hurt emotionally? Do they blame everything on the other person or are they still able to make an objective analysis of the situation?
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Nov 05, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 201 · Topics: 21
They disappear... Just bury themselves to the ground.
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Nov 25, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 162 · Topics: 17
Shak, I've sent you a PM. I do understand it. I am sorry if I made you feel bad by asking you to comment on this thread. Best wishes...
yeah, Virgo i knew would say, 'i've been lying low'.... they become strangers...
do you think they also strike back and are mean to you like say 'hope you don't contact me again' and such things becauz they are hurt or becuz they really don't want to talk with you again.....
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
when I'm hurt, I deal with it; that's why I'm selective of the people I have in my life. makes life easy; if I get involved with a recovering addict, I had best prepare for a long list of letdowns; if I deal with scum, I get scum, it's simple. People can either do good, or bad in life; you may not be able to predict which they do, or the frequency, but they can go either way, so generally knowing that makes dealing with let downs. people are people and they screw up; I can't blame somebody else for my dirty laundry; I WORE THE CLOTHES. Virgo is not a water sign, suffer no delusions; so there's no crying need to blame another person for a personal screw up; it's your life you fucked it up, so fix it, or lament in a puddle of pitty; what'll it be?.
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
depends on the TYPE OF HURT AS WELL. So, what is the pain FFV?
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
when I hurt it's also hard to tell, becuase I don't show my hurts to anyone. I rationalize until the pain makes sense, or I drop it completely; memory deleted. whatever serves the greater purpose.
So, VE have you ever been in love? and if someone was getting too close for your comfort would you strike back at them by being mean and pushing them away, so you didn't have to look like the weak one or the mean one, but the strong one?
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Jan 18, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 13612 · Topics: 756
I truly do not understand the concept of being hurt by someone else..!!
Nobody can hurt me but me ?by my own thoughts and my own expectations about any given situations?..!
It's called disappointments . But then?. You have no right to feel ?hurt?, cause every single human being are free to do what ever they have to (note? ?they have to? not ?they want to?).
Hurt feeling comes directly from arrogances and self promoted ego? nothing more nothing less..!
Why am ?I? not being understood??. Why they do things in the way ?I? don't like..?... sort of things like this?!
Me and my disappointments makes me feel BAD? and HURT?!!
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Jan 18, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 13612 · Topics: 756
And to answer to this superficial question ?!
When the limits are reached, everyone tends to detach from the emotional ordeal..!! Be it Virgo or not..!!
Stop spreading gossips about VIRGO, we are NOT that GOOD and we are NOT that BAD!!
Astrological racists..lol
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Jan 18, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 13612 · Topics: 756
Correcting?
?everyone tends to detach from the emotional ordeal..!!?
?everyone tends to detach and then escape from the emotional ordeal..!!?
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Dec 06, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 795 · Topics: 11
Virgo tends to go into reality to escape the reality of themselves. In a way, Virgos become realistic as a form of escapism from their personal feelings.
you know, that really does work. except it doesn't make me sad, it makes me happy.. ^_^
and yes I had to observe a virgo to realize this. : P ya'll have cool solutions.
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Sep 19, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 702 · Topics: 22
I truly do not understand the concept of being hurt by someone else..!!
Nobody can hurt me but me ?by my own thoughts and my own expectations about any given situations?..!
It's called disappointments . But then?. You have no right to feel ?hurt?, cause every single human being are free to do what ever they have to (note? ?they have to? not ?they want to?).
Hurt feeling comes directly from arrogances and self promoted ego? nothing more nothing less..!
Why am ?I? not being understood??. Why they do things in the way ?I? don't like..?... sort of things like this?!
Me and my disappointments makes me feel BAD? and HURT?!!
i totally agree with this point. HURT vs HURT . what's the solution? i am hurting so i have to detach myself. my partner i think is hurting that's why he/she's taking too much of her/his space. SOO what's the solution? NOTHING!
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Aug 16, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 435 · Topics: 28
"Virgo tends to go into reality to escape the reality of themselves. In a way, Virgos become realistic as a form of escapism from their personal feelings"
Very accurate for myself.
Once I feel dissapointed (I use that word as well my virgo buddies) I try to dettach myself completely for a while. Then I re-think and I try to understand the other person, let them know why I am bothered by something and wait to see what the response is.
If I think the response doesn't align with my expectations, then detachment is the only way for a while...the more I cared about someone...the longer I need to dissapear.
I try to be objective when I feel sadness and dissapoinment, but I also escape from my feelings but trying to be as realistic with myself as I can about the nature of human beigns. I shift my focus on something else overtime.
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Sep 19, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 702 · Topics: 22
the more I cared about someone...the longer I need to dissapear.
HUH?
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Sep 19, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 702 · Topics: 22
before i tend to hurt myself too much. too much caring about someone is killing me softly. but how far can we really put up with this fear that the more we get close to the people we love the more they will try to attack us? this is destructive reality and the more it makes me miserable and unhappy for doing such. i've overcome this fear of getting hurt by being more open to what is really hurting me.
it's like letting someone know especially the one you love what your prayer last night was about.
Yes, this is true about lying low my virgo guy saids that and he would disappear for weeks and weeks without calling or anything, But as soon as you get upset and say something he would always I love you I care about you so much. But I would have to get upset for him to come around to his self. It's crazy ..
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Aug 16, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 435 · Topics: 28
vgurl,
"the more I cared about someone...the longer I need to dissapear"
i was refering to how i operate when i distance myself from people that disspointed me.
the more i have cared about the person the higher the expectations...therefore the deeper dissapointed...and so longer time to drift away for me...because it take more time to recover. does it make more sense now?
vll
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Sep 19, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 702 · Topics: 22
i was refering to how i operate when i distance myself from people that disspointed me.
the more i have cared about the person the higher the expectations...therefore the deeper dissapointed...and so longer time to drift away for me...because it take more time to recover. does it make more sense now?
i can see from there how disappointing things may seem if your expectations are not met the way you wanted. why do you want it? why do you need it? do you realize that by doing such you care about yourself and not the person? you said you care for the other that's why you disappear. doesn't make sense to me. does it mean you'd rather not talk about it? does it mean you don't know what you'll talk about? if not, what? what's the solution? nothing. what happens -- BREAKUP.
does it mean you'd rather suffer by taking things at is it and be miserable without TRYING to compromise on the things that disappoints you? that may mean that these needs may be changed to make your relationship a more fulfilling one? that may mean your behavior needs to be more tamed for your relationship with your partner to grow? we all have our needs and wants i assume 80 percent of it is, but does the remaining 20 percent of it for compromise gone?
it's ok to deny this to me, because it takes one to know one.
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Aug 16, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 435 · Topics: 28
well, i think i was referring to the cases where i know i have placed an expectation in someone and that someone met to fullfill it.
sometimes, most of the time, i do talk about it, but it is also up to the other person to take what i say in consideration or not. when they don't or they don't seem to do it...then that is when i feel that i should go away from them for a while, so i can re-focus in something more tangible and more fairt to me.
for me to put 110% effort into something, like a relationship, i need to know there is at least some level of reciprocity as well...and a high one, otherwise, like brahn would say...why waste my time.
you got very good question for me here vgurl...and i don't know if the purpose was to make me evaluate things today but it came very handy for me right now...
"why do you want it? why do you need it? do you realize that by doing such you care about yourself and not the person?"
why do it want it?
why do i need it?
awesome questions!
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Aug 16, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 435 · Topics: 28
sometimes i act according to what i should do...but i dont ask myself these questions so much. it is fair to say that i want to make people happy, but i also need to know what is it that i need and why...there has to be a balance in any good relationship.
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Jan 18, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 13612 · Topics: 756
there has to be a balance in any good relationship.
relationship is about to give and receive?as far as I know..
"Virgo is not a water sign, suffer no delusions;" - VE
When virgos are hurt, they try as hard as possible to pretend not to be to protect a self image of being pristine which was never realistic in the first place. When they hurt you, they act like something is wrong with you for being human and capable of being hurt. Last I checked all of the above is QUITE deluded.
"Virgos many not only have a bruised heart, but bruised pride as well. It becomes impossible for them to face themselves, so they become very busy so they'll have an excuse to gloss over their personal torment." - brahn
That sounds much more in line with my experiences with a lot of virgos....it can be difficult to face your own imperfections when you are so unforgiving about the imperfections of others. Not to mention embarassing as all of the people who are used to you going off at the mouth ad infintum about what's wrong with everyone else are looking at you with a knowing smirk...
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Nov 25, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 162 · Topics: 17
VIRGOEXALTE So, what is the pain FFV?
It was just a hypothetical question. Just trying to understand virgos better... Perhaps a broken heart or some kind of failure due to other people and/or circumstances...
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Nov 25, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 162 · Topics: 17
notso07: Virgos don't get hurt. They do the hurting.
LOL! I just have to agree with that! This virgo guy that I'm interested in has hurt me a lot because he was withdrawing while I was trying to get closer. But I agree with Qbone in that it was actually ME that caused the hurt because I formed some expectations about him (he didn't know them) and I was so hurt and disappointed when he did not meet those expectations. It's silly really. But at least I know the source of my feelings (mostly, that is! ) Signed Up:
Nov 25, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 162 · Topics: 17
Roxijam: what is the latest with your virgo man??
Thanks for asking Roxi! He left town right before Christmas and I left right after. We are still on two different continents and I won't see him until mid January. I sent him a merry Christmas email the day he left, he sent me a reply a couple of days later. He was friendly in his email and I got the impression that he wanted to keep exchanging emails, so I sent him a reply but haven't heard from him yet.
I am using this time apart to evaluate my feelings for him and also evaluate the possibility of us getting closer. I hope he's using his time likewise...
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
lindawin; I have been in love....I offer my EVERYTHING.....my walls just melt....I am like puddy when I am in love.....I will kill, and die for my lover; I love the people in my life so much I just remain at a distance; I don't STRIKE as you say; not even to appear to be the stronger one; strength means only something to me if it is meant to protect my lover; to shower them with the love I have for them; love is honestly my EVERYTHING; I try to pretend that I this unloveable type, I try to initially convince people that "I love you so damned much that I will give my EVERYTHING"....that strength scares me....this deep internal fire that burns inside my soul for my lover....I don't care who's weak or strong, all I know is that my barriers melt, they fall down and I fall in love with you....I want to kiss you, I want to hold you, sing to you, hold you close, and let you go, for you to come home to me....
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
I don't play the domination game lindawin; I play the love game; I'm always thinking about love; I don't tell anyone that becuase I don't want them to realize that I can't be relyed upon; that I want my relationship to be perfect; down to the last detail; I want to love you, NEVER control you; I want my lover to feel free, and burning for me with passion, and ardor not hate, or lament; I have very intense feelings but am also very distal and windy at first, but once you have me; I change...I keep my distance to come to my senses; the NEEDING of someone is scary to me...there have been times when all I want is to go to someone and let them hold me untill I can't cry any longer....I abandoned my feelings, for a while becuase I felt so rejected, and so unwanted....I want to be someone's everything, their ENTIRE WORLD. I want to know what makes them tick so I can make their pain go away....I want to be the place they return to when the world may seem to turn on them......I want to display my love for you ANYWHERE AND EVERYWHERE....nobody knows this side of me....this passionate, and loving tender part; gives me chills.....being close to someone, and them rejecting you.....them leaving you for someone else is so painful you feel like you're on fire and they lit you a flame.....I love all the people in my life with equal intensity, and passion, but with my lover I just show more frequency....But on the outside, I seem cold, and aloof, but I'm not; it's my way of weeding out your intentions; I have my ways of finding out about people; into the inner most parts of them without trying to destroy them; I want to support them.
VE - WOWweee! You sound fabulous - every woman's dream... and pieces of what you said i can relate to with person i was 'with'... and yet also, other things you say are so true about Virgos -- you may be FEELING all this INSIDE you -- but how much of that passion and intensity are you REVEALING to them?.....
that i think in a nutshell is the problem/difference between Virgo and Scorpio -- everything you said is how I AM -- but i show it, speak it, say it, act it, etc. where Virgo's may feel it too, but they don't show it or say it or speak it, becuz of their inner turmoil and analyses i guess.....
it's kinda sad really,
but you do sound like a wonderful man to love or have in love with you.....
where do you live --- ha ha!!! just kidding!!!!!
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
also lindawin, I tend to 'dummy down' my feelings for my lover, becuase I know that I am usually a seething cauldron of feelings that can explode violently, or passionately; but I know that moment can set us back too far, and I want to walk forward with you; If I love you more than displaying my outright rage, I will put the brunt of my anger on the back burner, and show you a sharp glare, or something more 'gentle'....I do that with everyone I know. I just don't want to hurt them, and waste time aplogizing for a stupid, avoidable mistake. I appear light, and detached, but I have a strong undercurrent of emotions, that when roused can usually knock people on their asses! lol I only show people an anger more 'appropriate' I can tell how much people can take, so I back off; I don't want to dominate, or hurt someone just becuase I can yell louder, so I will be the bigger one, and just be logical, or hold you until you understand.
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
I can express it very easily linda, that's no problem; I'm just not that mars type; I don't explode in hopes that everyone understands that I mean buisness, and that they'd better not piss me off, I'm not that insecure; I don't cover my weaknesses up; I'm human, weakness is only apart of us; there is virtually no differences between the two of us; I tend to see the bigger picture, and do what is good for the both of us, so revealing emotions isn't hard, I just don't want to smother my lover; also, it turns me on more than anything to stock pile my passion and let it build; I might flash a smile, or a a strong glare, ya know that virgoan stare; that's code for 'let's do the damn thing till the sun comes up, then let's do it in the shower!' lol. IT DRIVES ME CRAZZZZZYYY!!! LOL!! I like a girl who knows how to tease, and burn a guy, but can control herself effortlessly; coming outright, somtimes can be boring, and lacks imagination; the fantasy is the best part......but doing it can be just a fun too now!....
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
no inner turmoil, just a whole lot of feelings boiling up....wanna get caught in my cross fire lindawin? lol Signed Up:
Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
look CancerLa, brahn is HIS virgo, not MINE since when did brahn become the embassador of the Virgoan race? lol. People are different, so just becuase we happen not to fit the 'virgoan archetype' dosen't mean we aren't. I could care less about somebody elses imperfections; I don't even worry about my own; being human is to ere, cancerla, you seem more harder on me for not fiting your mold than necessary. there's more important buisness to attend than nitpicking apart some obviously slanted bit of data that someone picked up off the internet. that is another reason why this virgo, isn't a water sign, it's about the REAL not the fraudulant. In reality things can always change and nothing can appear as it seems, so why do you appear baffled by a Virgo whom just doesn't happen to meet your criterion? What if there are two different types of virgos, who share some traits, but can generally be different? Ah, the magic of possibility.... Signed Up:
Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
why don't you seem to believe this cancerla? just curious....you're just hangin' on to this thought aren't you? ever the tenacious crab aren't we? lol....the power of the open-mind is great no? lol Signed Up:
Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
anyway linda, I'm a more distant type, I don't like being in a smothering, and paranoid relationship, it would turn me into a hateful, mean, bastard, btw,I'm not analyzing, I'm fantisizing; I need space, and freedom to explore, and express myself and all these feelings, but when I want to be close I will get very close; be vocal, tell me if I'm too distant; also I know that there is a very big difference between love, and lust, and obsession, and detatchment. I will not hold onto someone untill they are sick of having me up their ass. have some form of an independent life you know? lol That's one of the best parts of being in a relationship, spending time apart to heat up when you get together!! controling, and opressing someone isn't love; it's obsession, and I find that psychologically disturbing, and sickening. There is love, than obsession find out what you feel, and if you feel obsession, you gotta let go because that thing you love you could turn to hate....so a little detachment is a good thing so you can just think about all the things you two can do together......the abstract is my living ground, and being in reality can be such a bother all the time especially in a relationship.....gotta be imaginative. hmmmmm... love a man who knows how to speak, talk, think and articulate.... oh, but if only you were real.... ha!
i don't like to be smothered either.... but i do like to be given love and attention.... had it with the one (long distance affair), but when you are both in other situations, you can't really, and when one gets too emotional, the other V -- pulls away... that is basically what happened....
i know the feelings were mutually -- the conversations, the wanting, but when it comes down to brass tacks, the V analyzes and realizes i can't do this, whereas the S thinks only of the love/emotions/relationship she wants.... i'll think about the hows later...
i love that song by Snow Patrol - Chasing Cars....
"why don't you seem to believe this cancerla? just curious....you're just hangin' on to this thought aren't you? ever the tenacious crab aren't we? lol....the power of the open-mind is great no?"
ahhhh...pointless babble from the confused youth considering thearapy...lol
...and shaka..there are way more virgos in my life than some lame ex.....if you feel that what I say about them is untrue, then just beg to differ and support that. Typical virgo who can't deal with a critique...many posters of virtually all signs have agreed time and time again with my comments based on their own personal experience with virgos.....we all can't be just "venting"....
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Sep 19, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 702 · Topics: 22
"love a man who knows how to speak, talk, think and articulate...."
this holds something true and real. that when you choose someone you want to marry, you have to choose someone you can communicate with. we all have our needs in a relationship but no soul in this earth will ever have a clue what these needs are. women most often the not gets frustrated with men who are insensitive. count me in. i am one. but little do they know that men doesn't neccessarily have to jump in and fix things, when emotional turmoil arise within the union, a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, or by simply just being there and not distant will make things a whole lot better.
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
If I had a nickel for every crab that turned salty; I'd be rich CLA; what a low-balling assualt; you obviously are a bitter, lonely little person, whom needs the couch-time more than I do. Don't take your personal bias for your ex out on me, becuase I've nothing to do with it. Sheesh, if you want to talk that's one thing, but just venting when I'm explaining my self is downright selfish; emotional people are selfish, I supose that settles it. You really don't like Virgos? Good! Join the club! just one less person who we have to share our intellect with. To criticize is to care deeply for something, and I wouldn't give you, or anybody else the time of day to help them with it. I critique myself, and everyone else can do in oblivion for all I care. People just aren't THAT interesting. It's like I said; distance is necessary from driving a person insane with envy, and bitterness;
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
Although I'm in the process of getting my shit together, I'm not stuck in the past over one lousy lay. You're burning inside and it's eating YOU alive CLA; lol pathetic really; resorting to personal assaults to strike a nerve lol......you'll get yours; may the cogs of fate turn in your favor, becuase you seem to really be stuck. I pity you.
"If I had a nickel for every crab that turned salty; I'd be rich CLA; what a low-balling assualt; you obviously are a bitter, lonely little person, whom needs the couch-time more than I do."
lol...me and lonely have never been an item....and as far as "couch time" is concerned...aren't you the one on another post having a meltdown of some sorts?
"Don't take your personal bias for your ex out on me"
like i've said a thousand times, I have many virgos in my life and I care for them...still, that doesn't mean that there are not patterns among them that I've noticed...if you can't handle that, its more your problem than mine. Maybe maturity in years to come will handle that for you.
"Although I'm in the process of getting my butter together, I'm not stuck in the past over one lousy lay. You're burning inside and it's eating YOU alive CLA"
now that's truly laughable...and assumptive as usual. Since you insist on ignoring the other 10 or 12 virgos in my life and focusing on this ex, lets just state the facts of that situation....IN REALITY (let me introduce you lol) I'm happily in another relationship. The virgo ex is in therapy (where they belong) after trying to force two subsequent relationships that didn't work in an attempt to try and replace what they had with me (which they confided in a mutual friend). They also had a friend of theirs move in with them to try to help them cover the rent----and of course they drove that person crazy and they moved out. The now former roomate is also a mutual friend, who while venting about the virgo mentioned that they still log online to see if my profile is back up...which of course it isn't because I deleted it when I got involved with someone new who did not have their issues...now THAT'S "pathetic"...lol
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Jul 11, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 3318 · Topics: 123
if you are happy all is well. I didn't intend to hear the mind-numbing drivel and lies you concoct; truth be told I could care alot less about your 'fantasy relationship' and don't bother trying to validate yourself; it only makes you look less convincing. You know the truth, so, why the crying need to bemoan the loss, and faults of Virgos; what, is it for real CLA they got a little to close for comfort with the truth? Perhaps it's your own dirty laundry that needs cleaning, and the ALEDGED 10 OR 12 VIRGOS IN YOUR LIFE GOT SICK OF BEING THE CLEAN UP COMMITY TRYING TO CLEAN UP THE FLOOR THAT BECAME YOUR LIFE. I'm offering a new way of looking at this situation; I know that you just can't let a Virgo go, and ulitmately; your loss; and yes, you burn even brighter now. crabs, anyone? lol
"ALEDGED 10 OR 12 VIRGOS IN YOUR LIFE GOT SICK OF BEING THE CLEAN UP COMMITY TRYING TO CLEAN UP THE FLOOR THAT BECAME YOUR LIFE."
lol..this from a person whose life is in shambles.
"The huberis of the defeated..." rotf
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Apr 13, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 44084 · Topics: 685
I don't know about anybody else, but . . I love being a bitch . . I have extra salt for whomever needs a pinch.
"since you keep on going into broken record mode from time to time but in the end find yourself in most cases merely cookiemonstering about whatever your ex did to you (even most of the time when no one asked you about it) its quite remarkable that you dont mention those other "less annoying" virgos that often, I suppose you just "conviniently" skip any positive influences they may have had on you, because yeah you need to get over this ex so what a better way to do that than starting a cookiemonsteringfest on the whole sign of virgo using your ex as the sacrificed goat,"
lol...interestingly enough shaka, the ex has only been mentioned when the topic of discusion was EXES....Eureka. Most of my comments about virgos are general and based on my experiences with ALL of them. Not to mention I've given credit where it is due on good virgo qualities such as:
- loyalty
- truth
- work ethic...and I've also had more than a little to say how good of friends I am with several virgos....so if anyone is conveniently leaving out information.....its you...which of course is not surprise being that you're a ....
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Apr 13, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 44084 · Topics: 685
Back to the original question: How do Virgos act when they are hurt emotionally?
My husband cries, snuggles into my arms and shutters until the immediate pain is past. Once he feels like himself again, which sometimes it can take awhile to release his grief, then he wants space to meditate, then he picks himself up and faces whatever it was with intent that's honest to how he feels . . however the cards lay, so be it . . he knows he's true - if he's wrong he faces it, if the other person is wrong, he faces it - and he knows that I stand next to him because I know he's true to himself.
There . . that's my experience when a V gets hurt.
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Apr 13, 2005Comments: 0 · Posts: 44084 · Topics: 685
From my experience . . the only time my Virgo blamed me for something is when I was wrong.