Taurus bf confusing me!

This topic was created in the Taurus forum by Acj on Monday, January 13, 2020 and has 14 replies.
Hi. My Taurus BF & I (Aries) together 9 months. He has been broken up with in all his past relationships basically. We are in our 50s. I have shown insecurity about his ex gf and him not saying loving words to me. We had a talk at 6months he said he wasn’t head over heels with me. He said he didn’t know why he couldn’t say he love me. I said I’m not there yet either and I’m cautious. I said maybe we should take a break. He said no he wants me and he to continue. He said then he’s crazy about me & likes me a lot. He asked for a pass and said he didn’t know what why he said that.

Now at 9 months I’ve been happy and confident but no l I love yous. However he acts like it. He is very loving got me heart necklace and earrings perfume and tix for play for xmas. He wanted me to meet his relatives I did. He is consistent. Texts thru day. Tells me to be safe driving etc. always says gnight. He always rubs my back holds my hand makes me dinners. We both like eachs kids. He always wants to see me wknds and once weekday. Etc. Met his friends etc. I still am wondering how much he likes me and I can’t ask cause he is one who hates talking about emotions. He is on the quiet side. I can ask him but I don’t want to be insecure and that’s how he sees it. My love language is words & touch. his is touch and time together. I’m just afraid if he doesn’t love me yet or won’t love me that I’m wasting time. I’m so confused. I want to know. Pls help. He is also a very slow goer. Lots of past hurts as I’ve said
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I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend Craig for a year and this problem seems to be bothering me more and more, rather than getting better.

I met him when I was 20 and he was actually the first relationship I have ever had. He, on the other hand, has had a number of relationships in the past, and began seeing one of them when he was 17. Craig is now 24 and says that I am the one and that he would like to spend his life with me but I can't stop thinking about him having been with his exes and can't seem to get over it. Knowing that he has been so intimate with people, some of which he didn't even really know very well, sometimes makes me even think I might be happier if I left him. For me sex is something extremely intimate and having never been with anyone else myself makes me wonder whether I can accept his past and move on.

I try and talk to him about it but he says to stop being silly as he doesn't think about them anymore and that he loves me.

What makes things worse is that Craig still sees one of his exes, since after they were in a relationship, they became friends and shared a flat together. This other guy was apparently very jealous of me though because he still had feelings for Craig, who no longer felt anything for him. But once I was looking at some of Craig’s photos on his laptop and found rather intimate photos of them from when they were together. I asked Craig about it and told him it made me unhappy that he still had these photos but he told me that he didn't want to erase his past like that and delete them.

I trust that nothing is going on, but I don't know if I can get over the fact that Craig has been with other people in the past. I want to live my life with him and I love him, but don't know if I can be truly happy. I have already read loads of blogs and gossip sites about getting over your partner's exes, but none of them seem to help. I think the main reason is that Craig is the only person I have been with, and for me sex is something I couldn't do unless I was in love, while some of the times Craig has just done it to 'have fun'.

I would be very grateful for any advice you may have that could help me to move on.
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Isn't it more important to judge how he treats you?

Why does saying I love you mean you are not wasting your time? A guy could say it but not mean it, but that would satisfy you as far as you are concerned.

Anyway, wasting your time? Do you want to have a child? What's your end goal and when do you want to have it by?
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Posted by saggurl88

I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend Craig for a year and this problem seems to be bothering me more and more, rather than getting better.

I met him when I was 20 and he was actually the first relationship I have ever had. He, on the other hand, has had a number of relationships in the past, and began seeing one of them when he was 17. Craig is now 24 and says that I am the one and that he would like to spend his life with me but I can't stop thinking about him having been with his exes and can't seem to get over it. Knowing that he has been so intimate with people, some of which he didn't even really know very well, sometimes makes me even think I might be happier if I left him. For me sex is something extremely intimate and having never been with anyone else myself makes me wonder whether I can accept his past and move on.

I try and talk to him about it but he says to stop being silly as he doesn't think about them anymore and that he loves me.

What makes things worse is that Craig still sees one of his exes, since after they were in a relationship, they became friends and shared a flat together. This other guy was apparently very jealous of me though because he still had feelings for Craig, who no longer felt anything for him. But once I was looking at some of Craig’s photos on his laptop and found rather intimate photos of them from when they were together. I asked Craig about it and told him it made me unhappy that he still had these photos but he told me that he didn't want to erase his past like that and delete them.

I trust that nothing is going on, but I don't know if I can get over the fact that Craig has been with other people in the past. I want to live my life with him and I love him, but don't know if I can be truly happy. I have already read loads of blogs and gossip sites about getting over your partner's exes, but none of them seem to help. I think the main reason is that Craig is the only person I have been with, and for me sex is something I couldn't do unless I was in love, while some of the times Craig has just done it to 'have fun'.

I would be very grateful for any advice you may have that could help me to move on.
If you feel this way, then the only solution is to dump this guy and find yourself a virgin.

Of course your new virgin might feel the same way about you and think that you cant work in a relationship because you've been to bed with someone else.

It's certainly a conundrum...
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Posted by jeane
Posted by saggurl88

I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend Craig for a year and this problem seems to be bothering me more and more, rather than getting better.

I met him when I was 20 and he was actually the first relationship I have ever had. He, on the other hand, has had a number of relationships in the past, and began seeing one of them when he was 17. Craig is now 24 and says that I am the one and that he would like to spend his life with me but I can't stop thinking about him having been with his exes and can't seem to get over it. Knowing that he has been so intimate with people, some of which he didn't even really know very well, sometimes makes me even think I might be happier if I left him. For me sex is something extremely intimate and having never been with anyone else myself makes me wonder whether I can accept his past and move on.

I try and talk to him about it but he says to stop being silly as he doesn't think about them anymore and that he loves me.

What makes things worse is that Craig still sees one of his exes, since after they were in a relationship, they became friends and shared a flat together. This other guy was apparently very jealous of me though because he still had feelings for Craig, who no longer felt anything for him. But once I was looking at some of Craig’s photos on his laptop and found rather intimate photos of them from when they were together. I asked Craig about it and told him it made me unhappy that he still had these photos but he told me that he didn't want to erase his past like that and delete them.

I trust that nothing is going on, but I don't know if I can get over the fact that Craig has been with other people in the past. I want to live my life with him and I love him, but don't know if I can be truly happy. I have already read loads of blogs and gossip sites about getting over your partner's exes, but none of them seem to help. I think the main reason is that Craig is the only person I have been with, and for me sex is something I couldn't do unless I was in love, while some of the times Craig has just done it to 'have fun'.

I would be very grateful for any advice you may have that could help me to move on.


If you feel this way, then the only solution is to dump this guy and find yourself a virgin.

Of course your new virgin might feel the same way about you and think that you cant work in a relationship because you've been to bed with someone else.

It's certainly a conundrum...
click to expand


I just googled this and posted itLaughing Seems like a bunch of made up stories all the sudden spammed this board. I wanted to post a story too.
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Posted by saggurl88
Posted by jeane
Posted by saggurl88

I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend Craig for a year and this problem seems to be bothering me more and more, rather than getting better.

I met him when I was 20 and he was actually the first relationship I have ever had. He, on the other hand, has had a number of relationships in the past, and began seeing one of them when he was 17. Craig is now 24 and says that I am the one and that he would like to spend his life with me but I can't stop thinking about him having been with his exes and can't seem to get over it. Knowing that he has been so intimate with people, some of which he didn't even really know very well, sometimes makes me even think I might be happier if I left him. For me sex is something extremely intimate and having never been with anyone else myself makes me wonder whether I can accept his past and move on.

I try and talk to him about it but he says to stop being silly as he doesn't think about them anymore and that he loves me.

What makes things worse is that Craig still sees one of his exes, since after they were in a relationship, they became friends and shared a flat together. This other guy was apparently very jealous of me though because he still had feelings for Craig, who no longer felt anything for him. But once I was looking at some of Craig’s photos on his laptop and found rather intimate photos of them from when they were together. I asked Craig about it and told him it made me unhappy that he still had these photos but he told me that he didn't want to erase his past like that and delete them.

I trust that nothing is going on, but I don't know if I can get over the fact that Craig has been with other people in the past. I want to live my life with him and I love him, but don't know if I can be truly happy. I have already read loads of blogs and gossip sites about getting over your partner's exes, but none of them seem to help. I think the main reason is that Craig is the only person I have been with, and for me sex is something I couldn't do unless I was in love, while some of the times Craig has just done it to 'have fun'.

I would be very grateful for any advice you may have that could help me to move on.


If you feel this way, then the only solution is to dump this guy and find yourself a virgin.

Of course your new virgin might feel the same way about you and think that you cant work in a relationship because you've been to bed with someone else.

It's certainly a conundrum...


I just googled this and posted itLaughing Seems like a bunch of made up stories all the sudden spammed this board. I wanted to post a story too.
click to expand
Fair enough
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With your place and birth data I can tell you if you have a destiny and wich. Time is not neccesary only if you know it.
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Posted by Acj

Hi. My Taurus BF & I (Aries) together 9 months. He has been broken up with in all his past relationships basically. We are in our 50s. I have shown insecurity about his ex gf and him not saying loving words to me. We had a talk at 6months he said he wasn’t head over heels with me. He said he didn’t know why he couldn’t say he love me. I said I’m not there yet either and I’m cautious. I said maybe we should take a break. He said no he wants me and he to continue. He said then he’s crazy about me & likes me a lot. He asked for a pass and said he didn’t know what why he said that.

Now at 9 months I’ve been happy and confident but no l I love yous. However he acts like it. He is very loving got me heart necklace and earrings perfume and tix for play for xmas. He wanted me to meet his relatives I did. He is consistent. Texts thru day. Tells me to be safe driving etc. always says gnight. He always rubs my back holds my hand makes me dinners. We both like eachs kids. He always wants to see me wknds and once weekday. Etc. Met his friends etc. I still am wondering how much he likes me and I can’t ask cause he is one who hates talking about emotions. He is on the quiet side. I can ask him but I don’t want to be insecure and that’s how he sees it. My love language is words & touch. his is touch and time together. I’m just afraid if he doesn’t love me yet or won’t love me that I’m wasting time. I’m so confused. I want to know. Pls help. He is also a very slow goer. Lots of past hurts as I’ve said

actions speak louder then words anyday. This problem stems from you. What Happened in your past?
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Haha. You’re very right. I’ve had lots of childhood issues I’ll try and give it time. Focus on actions but I hope words come I need them.
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Anyone Else have views ? Al articles say to talk to partner about what love means to them and romance and sex and financial and love language. Ete. He shies away from this stuff. Idk how is ever be comfortable taking like this to him. He would do it but it may be uncomfortable

I also forgot to mention. He has his ex gf pics 4 of them still on fb. She ended it they were together 3.5

Yrs. there were more but he took them

Down aftwr I complained a little. We are fb friends but I’m no where to be found as his gf. Bugs me. A lot. She and he are fb friend only they don’t talk. I do believe him when he says he’s over her(they ended summer 2018). Same time I did with my ex. He has told me I’m the total pkg etc. she wasn’t etc. they never even talked about moving in together or marriage. He said it was blah toward the last year but he just stayed. (As I did with mine). But he also said about fb that he wanted to wait with us too. Just so we are good. But we are good I thought. Oh also he did post pics of he and the ex aftwr a year and a half too so. Still bothers me. That I’m not on his fb at this time 9mos.

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New here. I’m a Taurus female. The thing is, where other signs talk about love, we SHOW it. All the things you’ve written about that he does for you are his way of saying I love you. And that he isn’t doing it to others he solely showers this attention on YOU. Secondly, Taurus takes ages moving on from loved ones but that won’t mean that he’s ‘in love’ with them. Just that people once special hold a small corner in their hearts and over time it becomes a happy memory when the bitterness is gone but it won’t necessarily mean he’s always thinking of them when he’s with you.

Also Taurus (men specially) can be dense sometimes and won’t be thinking of stuff like why he didn’t post your picture on FB yet. I suggest you find a lovely picture of you two in which you look gorgeous (not hot but beautiful) and send it over asking him if he likes it? And if he does then just say ‘hey you can put it up on FB!’

As to your worries about him having been with others, well he doesn’t sound like he has any complaints with you, it’s perhaps your own need to explore sexually that’s rearing its head?
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Shotsilk- thank you very much for your insight. It really helped see it another way -his way. Makes sense. I never had worries of him with anyone else. You may be getting me confused with the other poster. I am hoping he says the words though I need those. I’ve been silent and confident mostly but it makes me not knowing if he is in this for long term or not. He’s not the player type at all so I feel he’s all in but I need confirmation I can’t ask cause he perceives that as insecure. I can I guess but not now.
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Taurus are NOT vocal people about their feelings as I mentioned before. I mean the women would be in the beginning. How about this, the next time he does something sweet and loving, turn around, hold him close and say, ‘I love you too’. If nothing, it’ll throw him off a little bit! 🤣🤣
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That’s a good idea. Maybe I will. Would you give me insight on what I posted earlier about he saying he couldn’t say he loved me and wasn’t head over heels at 6months mark. He said it aftwr I was asking him” aren’t u happy you found me?” Etc. He all of a sudden said that stuff and I was floored. Cause he gave me a lot of loving actions I did tell him I am not there yet either and that I’m cautious. 6 mons also isnt long. He had Taken me on an annual couples camp trip I had met his family friends etc. we had a 3 hr talk I was upset though. He said no didn’t want to end he told me he wa a sorry and didn’t know why he said it Etc. From then on I’ve been confident and never bring up insecure stuff. I hide it.

He had told me too that he missed my during a wknd trip he went on he acted in love! So I’m still so bugged about this even 3 mos after the fact He didn’t say he was very worried about work too not making as much then. And he said he could see himself saying loved me and I said me too. I told him we need to end this is one of us feels we can never love the other. He said “that won’t happen “ he was also worried about getting older and if we don’t love each other.

Sorry so long.

He also told me that was the first time he opened up in relationships (our talk)

Hopefully you don’t mind giving more insight. smile

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