Can someone help me to understand what is going on in his Aquarian mind?

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by pinkbird03
@lisabethur8

@geminigirl052388

It worked! I gave him space for the most part. Just an occasional text here and there. Never bother him about working 14 hour days, not texting, and not calling. Then yesterday he talked to me throughout the day a little bit (which made me happy) and superisingly at night we actually talked two hours straight. His responses were instant. Well I may have used a little sexuality to prompt him.... it worked lol he was flirty and made sweet compliments and gave me the reassurance I was looking for!

jesus...what does he do when he has to work 14 hours day??

i remmber when i was with my 2nd ex, the super ambitioius one, and ironically the aqua one. lol

he had one of those fancy swancy titles for a job, but,

he really worked those 14 hour days and i was fine with it cause i was going to school and working too.


so it's gotta be some kind of job that requires his time ALOT.



https://hbr.org/2006/12/extreme-jobs-the-dangerous-allure-of-the-70-hour-workweek

click to expand

Posted by aquarius_man

Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by aquarius_man

Posted by pinkbird03Well I may have used a little sexuality to prompt him.... it worked lol he was flirty and made sweet compliments and gave me the reassurance I was looking for!

yea. keep fishing for reassurance and see how far this gets you.

I don’t believe he knew I was looking for reassurance because I left him alone. Only really said things like good morning, how’s your week going, hope you have a nice day, etc. I waited it out to see if he was still interested in me because I was a little concerned by his lack of effort but I figured it was because of work and I didn’t nag or question him about it.

this will be a recurrent pattern unless you discuss it with him from the onset.

aqua will eventually become irritated by this. explain to him why you are like this and he will understand.

i used to be extremely annoyed when the cancer girl i was banging would start sending me mushy/ paranoid texts while i was working hard and trying to focus on anything else but her

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Posted by Wineaux15
@Saweetz1988 you’re such a cutie!

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by MondayMorning
Justin Timberlake?! ha ha.

Okay so, another day passed and there was a shift in him and he started to speak to me very affectionately, calling me by the same pet names he uses for his grown up daughter. Affection is something I have only ever seen him demonstrate to his children, he is usually a pretty cold fish so this felt authentic.

He called to thank me for being there for him and speaking to him, and this is really unlike him. When we dated we barely spoke about anything "important" or "deep" and if I tried he ran a mile and didn't call me for a week so this is a new version of him where I think we are actually becoming proper friends and that makes me feel good.

He said he has booked in time with his therapist. This is kind of amazing. A year ago I was telling him the way he lived his life was kinda sad and he was reacting in total denial about it and now he's agreeing with me and wants to change it.

I feel like he's letting his walls down completely around me, and it feels nice because he would never do that before.

Anyway, he asked me if I would go on a date with him this week, so we have one booked this week. Not saying it will work out, maybe he does just want to be friends I really don't know but I feel better about it anyway.

Words, words, words

Been there twice

Don't fall for it

An astrologer friend of mine told me, in her experience most men, if they don't get a handle on themselves by their Uranus return (mid life crisis), they rarely do

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Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by bittercupcake

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by bittercupcake
Just be patient with him. Realize that Scorpios want a lover first, friend second. Aquarius want a friend first, lover second. You're coming at different angles and if you want total control (without him realizing it) of this relationship, then come at him through his perspective and in time, he will come at you with yours.

Aquarius aren't afraid of intensity or passion. We can actually handle it very well, I think the issue is coming on too strong when the Aquarius least expects it. We like small doses and when the time calls for it.

Aqua mars is wired?? I got that placement lol... why am I strange? Lol

i remember reading the article on Justin Timberlake when he asked Jennifier out on a date, they were NOT friends...

she turned him down several times but he was persistent. lol he really liked her energy i bet.

and she finally said yes. lol

so, no, if you read closely and notice, that other signs do this, and sometimes aqua doesn't.

my husband and i weren't friends at all, we met through company, and then hit it off, ops, meaning he asked me, cause he liked alot.



forgot to add, and friends stay in the FRIEND ZONE....

Jennifer.? Or Jessica? But they had actually met before, they just weren’t friends. If we have our eyes set on you and we know we want you, sure. But most of the tim we need to ease up on things. Plus he has Sag moon so it makes him very forward.

yeah i meant jessica. smh. lol


but they weren't friends though, they saw eachother and met, and he really wanted to be with her that's why he pursued her.

men pursue, that's really awesome on his part.

yeah that fire moon makes a man forward, and he got that aquarius mars. so strange but he doesn't come off weird or funky like the aquarius mars that is from Sasha Baron. Sasha Baron's aquarius mars is really funky, but i guess that's his comedian style ...still so weird.

even Justin Theroux's Aquarius mars doesn't come off weird.

i wonder if it's because of different aspects /placements.

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Posted by MondayMorning
Yeah, I can see we are very different. Every time I try and read him I get it totally wrong. He's a complete mystery to me, but then he says he feels the same about me so maybe we just totally confuse each other.

It's quite annoying that I am so attracted to someone I completely can't read or control. This is difficult for Scorpios, seriously!

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by pinkbird03
@lisabethur8

@geminigirl052388

It worked! I gave him space for the most part. Just an occasional text here and there. Never bother him about working 14 hour days, not texting, and not calling. Then yesterday he talked to me throughout the day a little bit (which made me happy) and superisingly at night we actually talked two hours straight. His responses were instant. Well I may have used a little sexuality to prompt him.... it worked lol he was flirty and made sweet compliments and gave me the reassurance I was looking for!

jesus...what does he do when he has to work 14 hours day??

i remmber when i was with my 2nd ex, the super ambitioius one, and ironically the aqua one. lol

he had one of those fancy swancy titles for a job, but,

he really worked those 14 hour days and i was fine with it cause i was going to school and working too.


so it's gotta be some kind of job that requires his time ALOT.



https://hbr.org/2006/12/extreme-jobs-the-dangerous-allure-of-the-70-hour-workweek

click to expand

Posted by saweetz1988

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by MondayMorning
Justin Timberlake?! ha ha.

Okay so, another day passed and there was a shift in him and he started to speak to me very affectionately, calling me by the same pet names he uses for his grown up daughter. Affection is something I have only ever seen him demonstrate to his children, he is usually a pretty cold fish so this felt authentic.

He called to thank me for being there for him and speaking to him, and this is really unlike him. When we dated we barely spoke about anything "important" or "deep" and if I tried he ran a mile and didn't call me for a week so this is a new version of him where I think we are actually becoming proper friends and that makes me feel good.

He said he has booked in time with his therapist. This is kind of amazing. A year ago I was telling him the way he lived his life was kinda sad and he was reacting in total denial about it and now he's agreeing with me and wants to change it.

I feel like he's letting his walls down completely around me, and it feels nice because he would never do that before.

Anyway, he asked me if I would go on a date with him this week, so we have one booked this week. Not saying it will work out, maybe he does just want to be friends I really don't know but I feel better about it anyway.

Words, words, words

Been there twice

Don't fall for it

An astrologer friend of mine told me, in her experience most men, if they don't get a handle on themselves by their Uranus return (mid life crisis), they rarely do

How old is this mid life crisis thing? lol

click to expand

Posted by aquarius_man

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by aquarius_man

Posted by MyStarsShine

An astrologer friend of mine told me, in her experience most men, if they don't get a handle on themselves by their Uranus return (mid life crisis), they rarely do

nah. as an aqua man myself, i will say its around the age of 30 that aqua males either get their shit together & grow up. or at all. 30 is not quite mid life crisis, is it.

But i was talking about men in general, not particularly Aquarius ones

that is a most ...irrelevant thing to say about men. in general

click to expand

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by saweetz1988

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by MondayMorning
Justin Timberlake?! ha ha.

Okay so, another day passed and there was a shift in him and he started to speak to me very affectionately, calling me by the same pet names he uses for his grown up daughter. Affection is something I have only ever seen him demonstrate to his children, he is usually a pretty cold fish so this felt authentic.

He called to thank me for being there for him and speaking to him, and this is really unlike him. When we dated we barely spoke about anything "important" or "deep" and if I tried he ran a mile and didn't call me for a week so this is a new version of him where I think we are actually becoming proper friends and that makes me feel good.

He said he has booked in time with his therapist. This is kind of amazing. A year ago I was telling him the way he lived his life was kinda sad and he was reacting in total denial about it and now he's agreeing with me and wants to change it.

I feel like he's letting his walls down completely around me, and it feels nice because he would never do that before.

Anyway, he asked me if I would go on a date with him this week, so we have one booked this week. Not saying it will work out, maybe he does just want to be friends I really don't know but I feel better about it anyway.

Words, words, words

Been there twice

Don't fall for it

An astrologer friend of mine told me, in her experience most men, if they don't get a handle on themselves by their Uranus return (mid life crisis), they rarely do

How old is this mid life crisis thing? lol

Astrologically, i think it happens around 42/43 yrs, saweetz

click to expand

Posted by saweetz1988

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by saweetz1988

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by MondayMorning
Justin Timberlake?! ha ha.

Okay so, another day passed and there was a shift in him and he started to speak to me very affectionately, calling me by the same pet names he uses for his grown up daughter. Affection is something I have only ever seen him demonstrate to his children, he is usually a pretty cold fish so this felt authentic.

He called to thank me for being there for him and speaking to him, and this is really unlike him. When we dated we barely spoke about anything "important" or "deep" and if I tried he ran a mile and didn't call me for a week so this is a new version of him where I think we are actually becoming proper friends and that makes me feel good.

He said he has booked in time with his therapist. This is kind of amazing. A year ago I was telling him the way he lived his life was kinda sad and he was reacting in total denial about it and now he's agreeing with me and wants to change it.

I feel like he's letting his walls down completely around me, and it feels nice because he would never do that before.

Anyway, he asked me if I would go on a date with him this week, so we have one booked this week. Not saying it will work out, maybe he does just want to be friends I really don't know but I feel better about it anyway.

Words, words, words

Been there twice

Don't fall for it

An astrologer friend of mine told me, in her experience most men, if they don't get a handle on themselves by their Uranus return (mid life crisis), they rarely do

How old is this mid life crisis thing? lol

Astrologically, i think it happens around 42/43 yrs, saweetz

You know I do agree with this. !!

click to expand

Posted by aquarius_man

Posted by MyStarsShine

It's an observation by an astrologer i know.......not fact. She studied many charts and knew many men and saw a pattern

did she say anything about when females grow up? i think it's 30-35

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Posted by MondayMorning
Achhhhhhhhhhh! My date was a total disaster!! I have no idea WTF happened here.

We went to a show and that part was great, we were holding hands and laughing. Got outside and we were holding hands and talking about where to go for dinner. He stops and pins me up against the wall and starts kissing me like crazy and it's really hot and passionate.

All good so far...

Then he says to me he is freaking out because he wants me really badly but he feels like he can't handle it. I ask him what he means and he says it feels "too intense" and he has never felt that before with a woman and he finds it uncomfortable and confusing. I tell him that's a good thing to feel that way and we carry on walking into the restaurant.

Then we sit down, and he says to me that his problem is that with me he feels out of control. He says I have all the "power" and he feels like I am in control of him or have him under a spell of some kind and that he doesn't like it because he's not used to this dynamic with women. I gently explain that isn't my intention and I like him as he is.

He then says I am the only woman who refused to put up with his BS and he says most women are happy for him to date more than one woman at once and he says I am head strong etc.

He says I baffle and puzzle him, because I am so passionate and come on so strong but then I back away and don't react to the way he behaves and while most women get angry or scream and cry, I am just calm and keep my head.

He is saying all this like it's not a good thing, but like he is annoyed that he can't get me to do or feel or say what he wants.

Then he pretty much says that he knew early on that we weren't a match and I am sitting there wondering WTF I am doing sitting at a dinner table a year later if this is how he feels. He says to me that maybe he has intimacy issues but that he has dated other women much longer than he dated me (heaps of dates he says) but that with me he knew early on that he didn't feel anything in his heart.

I am sitting there with my blood boiling because if that's true, why was he lying to me at the time saying he just needed to move slow? Grrr. I am trying to be patient by I feel like he's trying to pick an argument with me because it's degenerated into him saying really mean things as if he is trying to make me cry or react.

Then he says he wants to be friends, and I say I don't think I want to be friends and I look over and he is CRYING at the dinner table!

I pretty much got up and left, and he says to me that he wants me to think it over and come back to him if I change my mind. I am just thinking nothing that transpired tonight feels anything like the way "friends" behave. He starts hugging me in the street, and then we're kissing, and then he gets really upset and leaves.

So that was about the worst night ever! I have no idea WTF he was doing, but it seemed like he was trying to be as mean as possible to get me to go away.

Posted by Wineaux15

Posted by MondayMorning
Achhhhhhhhhhh! My date was a total disaster!! I have no idea WTF happened here.

We went to a show and that part was great, we were holding hands and laughing. Got outside and we were holding hands and talking about where to go for dinner. He stops and pins me up against the wall and starts kissing me like crazy and it's really hot and passionate.

All good so far...

Then he says to me he is freaking out because he wants me really badly but he feels like he can't handle it. I ask him what he means and he says it feels "too intense" and he has never felt that before with a woman and he finds it uncomfortable and confusing. I tell him that's a good thing to feel that way and we carry on walking into the restaurant.

Then we sit down, and he says to me that his problem is that with me he feels out of control. He says I have all the "power" and he feels like I am in control of him or have him under a spell of some kind and that he doesn't like it because he's not used to this dynamic with women. I gently explain that isn't my intention and I like him as he is.

He then says I am the only woman who refused to put up with his BS and he says most women are happy for him to date more than one woman at once and he says I am head strong etc.

He says I baffle and puzzle him, because I am so passionate and come on so strong but then I back away and don't react to the way he behaves and while most women get angry or scream and cry, I am just calm and keep my head.

He is saying all this like it's not a good thing, but like he is annoyed that he can't get me to do or feel or say what he wants.

Then he pretty much says that he knew early on that we weren't a match and I am sitting there wondering WTF I am doing sitting at a dinner table a year later if this is how he feels. He says to me that maybe he has intimacy issues but that he has dated other women much longer than he dated me (heaps of dates he says) but that with me he knew early on that he didn't feel anything in his heart.

I am sitting there with my blood boiling because if that's true, why was he lying to me at the time saying he just needed to move slow? Grrr. I am trying to be patient by I feel like he's trying to pick an argument with me because it's degenerated into him saying really mean things as if he is trying to make me cry or react.

Then he says he wants to be friends, and I say I don't think I want to be friends and I look over and he is CRYING at the dinner table!

I pretty much got up and left, and he says to me that he wants me to think it over and come back to him if I change my mind. I am just thinking nothing that transpired tonight feels anything like the way "friends" behave. He starts hugging me in the street, and then we're kissing, and then he gets really upset and leaves.

So that was about the worst night ever! I have no idea WTF he was doing, but it seemed like he was trying to be as mean as possible to get me to go away.

Oh God you poor thing. He’s in love with you and doesn’t know it. He’s a fool who’s never been in love and will sabotage it because he doesn’t know what it feels like or what it’s supposed to look like. Leave him be before you get hurt. Scorps love with their full being... if you continue you will fall so deep it’ll be hard to turn back... turn back while you can! He does have deep feelings for you... but he’s fighting them hard for whatever reason. Do you really want a man who will fight AGAINST his love for you versus FOR his love for you? I wouldn’t. Move on while you can.

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Posted by MondayMorning
I interpreted the evening's events as him saying "I like you a lot and want to be your friend and I also want to sleep with you, but I don't like you enough or feel enough to want a relationship with you and I am annoyed / angry that I can't hang out with you without this desire to have sex with you".

Did you all hear something different in the story?

Posted by saweetz1988

Posted by MondayMorning
I interpreted the evening's events as him saying "I like you a lot and want to be your friend and I also want to sleep with you, but I don't like you enough or feel enough to want a relationship with you and I am annoyed / angry that I can't hang out with you without this desire to have sex with you".

Did you all hear something different in the story?

Why can't you be friends without the sex?

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Posted by aquarius_man

Posted by MondayMorning

He then says I am the only woman who refused to put up with his BS and he says most women are happy for him to date more than one woman at once and he says I am head strong etc.

......

He is saying all this like it's not a good thing, but like he is annoyed that he can't get me to do or feel or say what he wants.

Bollocks. This man of yours, how old is he again?

He s so full of contradictions, and not in a good way.

What kind of woman is happy for him to date (as in ffuucckk) more than a woman? is he a player and a pimp and a celeb? Is he dating 16-yr olds with daddy issues?

what this man is actually saying to you is: i like you coz you re a strong woman but... i don't like strong women. im not man enough for them. im a puss. i like tarts and skanks who make me look like am a man and a stud and a hustla. im actually afraid of real, strong, & independent women.

dont waste your time on this a $ $ . you come across as a decent woman, he looks like me when i was 22.

drop his $ $ . ask him to let go of his old ways and embrace the new, or to bugger off.

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Posted by MondayMorning
Thanks @aquarius_man

He didn't say that, it was kind of worse! He said he'd be faithful for the right woman and he was ready to stop dating around but apparently not for ME!

Posted by aquarius_man

Posted by lisabethur8

sounds like my husband. he dont like independent women. not in the "true sense" ..independent...meaning like Oprah Winfrey independent. lol

thats his eastern european cultural heritage, must be.

but now, dont get me wrong and excuse meee but i agree w him: i dont like oprah winfrey independent either

i like lindsay lohan independent like

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Posted by aquarius_man

Posted by lisabethur8

OMG why did you show me this

It hurts

Poor Lindsay, looking like she has the runs

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Posted by aquarius_man

Posted by lisabethur8

sounds like my husband. he dont like independent women. not in the "true sense" ..independent...meaning like Oprah Winfrey independent. lol

thats his eastern european cultural heritage, must be.

but now, dont get me wrong and excuse meee but i agree w him: i dont like oprah winfrey independent either

i like lindsay lohan independent like

click to expand