How do I get a cap to forgive, forget and get back
This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by verbivorehere on Wednesday, May 15, 2013 and has 15 replies.
I posted this elsewhere..but I guess I need to start a fresh topic to post a question.
So heres the prob. Things were going smooth with me adoring this cap and he reveling in the adoration and we just exchanging not quite accidental "hi'" and smiles. We interacted as a group and got together as a group. All of a sudden i hear hes shifting and i find it too hard to digest. And before I knew anything, we have a flat party at his place and I drank too hard! I just over did it! night went smooth, with me acting pretty sensible..except late into the night when vryone fell asleep i kept whispering to him not to leave, but he was deep asleep. The next morning I cudnt stop myself from messaging him that id miss him if he left and he called up all pissed and worked up about my messages..i had sent 3-4 of them. We stop communicating or seing and after 2 months he arrives and in a not so accidental manner we exchange "hi"s. Then i walk upto him saying im sorry about what happened with the messages and I dint really mean it that way. He acts as though it was none of his business. Now, its been 8 months since, I wish we got back like how we were earlier. Was it such a complete mess up that I did? Cant he forgive and forget and start to where we were? Did my sorry piss him all the more? can i ever initiate a getting back if that was to happen?
So heres the prob. Things were going smooth with me adoring this cap and he reveling in the adoration and we just exchanging not quite accidental "hi'" and smiles. We interacted as a group and got together as a group. All of a sudden i hear hes shifting and i find it too hard to digest. And before I knew anything, we have a flat party at his place and I drank too hard! I just over did it! night went smooth, with me acting pretty sensible..except late into the night when vryone fell asleep i kept whispering to him not to leave, but he was deep asleep. The next morning I cudnt stop myself from messaging him that id miss him if he left and he called up all pissed and worked up about my messages..i had sent 3-4 of them. We stop communicating or seing and after 2 months he arrives and in a not so accidental manner we exchange "hi"s. Then i walk upto him saying im sorry about what happened with the messages and I dint really mean it that way. He acts as though it was none of his business. Now, its been 8 months since, I wish we got back like how we were earlier. Was it such a complete mess up that I did? Cant he forgive and forget and start to where we were? Did my sorry piss him all the more? can i ever initiate a getting back if that was to happen?
Okay, so, this does not seem like a question of him forgiving you. I am sure he is not upset or holding some kind of grudge.
You probably just were too dramatic in this instance for him to handle. He saw your reaction, you were in the early stages of getting to know him, you are texting him like a crazy woman. It doesn't really sound like anything even happened between the two of you other than flirting from what you have written here. But yet you went crazy texting him the next day, and he's probably thinking that if you are so over the top from one night sleeping at his apartment, you are going to be more trouble than you are worth. You came off as needy, dramatic, and maybe even a little desperate.
Wow, that sounds mean after I typed it all. Wasn't meant to be. Sorry.
You probably just were too dramatic in this instance for him to handle. He saw your reaction, you were in the early stages of getting to know him, you are texting him like a crazy woman. It doesn't really sound like anything even happened between the two of you other than flirting from what you have written here. But yet you went crazy texting him the next day, and he's probably thinking that if you are so over the top from one night sleeping at his apartment, you are going to be more trouble than you are worth. You came off as needy, dramatic, and maybe even a little desperate.
Wow, that sounds mean after I typed it all. Wasn't meant to be. Sorry.
Yes..I did come across dramatic with those few messages..but i was dead silent after that...wont things get back to normal? I mean i was drunk and stupid that day and I regret it till date 
He neednt hold grudge, true..but wont he change his judgement?
He neednt hold grudge, true..but wont he change his judgement?I don't think he will, considering it has been 8 months, he has probably written you off.
was he drunk that night also? maybe he thinks the two of you well...uhhh...you know?
i sincerely hope he hasnt written me off! Dunno why, something in the way he said that hi..kind of deliberate attention after that 2 months and something tells me he hasnt forgotten or is it me hoping! I dunno
He also did drink...but i dint understand what you meant by the rest of the sentence yofaithful...if its about getting intimate..as i said after 2 months i walked upto him and apologised for the "messages". I dnt think hed go to the extent of thinking physical intimacy...
He also did drink...but i dint understand what you meant by the rest of the sentence yofaithful...if its about getting intimate..as i said after 2 months i walked upto him and apologised for the "messages". I dnt think hed go to the extent of thinking physical intimacy...
Why are you holding on to him?
You are torturing yourself. There are plenty of other men out there. Probably better than this one.
You are torturing yourself. There are plenty of other men out there. Probably better than this one.
yes physical was what i meant...is it possible that he's currently in a relationship?
That again is that a problem of a libran mind? or is it coz of the 'theory of rejection' on the 'brain in love'? Im unable to let go of this fellow! Day in day out i wonder..if only that single instance can be erased and we could get back as just friends
he appeared way too wary when i interacted with anyone else...is it possible he gets into another relation so fast? i mean a days folly changed it all so fast? Hed actually stare if i walked up to anyone even to ask a doubt!
Please stop, he isn't interested and your a cool chick that could be very happy with someone who will give you the love and attention you desire! Go find that man cause everyone deserves to be happy and I foresee you beating yourself up and torturing yourself over someone who isn't worth it....
"We stop communicating or seing and after 2 months he arrives and in a not so accidental manner we exchange "hi"s. Then i walk upto him saying im sorry about what happened with the messages and I dint really mean it that way. He acts as though it was none of his business. Now, its been 8 months since, I wish we got back like how we were earlier."
He has not missed you enough to contact you in 8 months.
8 months is a long time!
It has been my experience that if you haven't heard from someone after about two weeks, they are never going to call you again.
Honestly, experience has told me that in most instances, if you have not contacted me in 5 days, you are never going to contact me again. But I did have two Taurus fellows who would contact me every other week or so. Just about when I was ready to write them off, they'd show up. Those Taurus boys are players and they have a 6th sense about it.
Everyone else, 5 days.
Then if I liked them, I'd contact them, and they would say they weren't feeling it, met someone else, had experienced a personal tragedy, etc.
You deserve to find someone who loves and appreciates you!
He has not missed you enough to contact you in 8 months.
8 months is a long time!
It has been my experience that if you haven't heard from someone after about two weeks, they are never going to call you again.
Honestly, experience has told me that in most instances, if you have not contacted me in 5 days, you are never going to contact me again. But I did have two Taurus fellows who would contact me every other week or so. Just about when I was ready to write them off, they'd show up. Those Taurus boys are players and they have a 6th sense about it.
Everyone else, 5 days.
Then if I liked them, I'd contact them, and they would say they weren't feeling it, met someone else, had experienced a personal tragedy, etc.
You deserve to find someone who loves and appreciates you!
Lots of good advice!!
I think you just scared him off. Caps like calm and cool, not emotional and dramatic.
And, stop beating yourself up! Consider it a lesson hard learned and move on.
I think you just scared him off. Caps like calm and cool, not emotional and dramatic.
And, stop beating yourself up! Consider it a lesson hard learned and move on.
Awww, that's too bad :/
I agree with what the others are saying about moving on now, but I wish you would've posted something earlier. If you posted this soon after the incident, we could've been more helpful. It doesn't seem like liquor is your friend, so I would've told you to stop drinking around him and to find a way to be in a situation where you can show off positive things about yourself. Talk is cheap to Caps but him seeing an improvement in your actions/behavior could've helped him change his mind about you.
Now that it's been 8 months, I don't think things will go back to how they were. So I guess you'll just need to look for another guy.
I agree with what the others are saying about moving on now, but I wish you would've posted something earlier. If you posted this soon after the incident, we could've been more helpful. It doesn't seem like liquor is your friend, so I would've told you to stop drinking around him and to find a way to be in a situation where you can show off positive things about yourself. Talk is cheap to Caps but him seeing an improvement in your actions/behavior could've helped him change his mind about you.
Now that it's been 8 months, I don't think things will go back to how they were. So I guess you'll just need to look for another guy.
Yup one night of drinks! I dint drink around him after that..as in we were never "around" after that. Was hoping for a second chance...to start afresh and never trouble! not irking you all here...i have already irked one capricorn! Thanks a lot everyone for the advice..il try to!
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