why is it so hard for Leo men and women to commit?
This topic was created in the Leo forum by missgemini89 on Monday, May 6, 2013 and has 37 replies.
I just realized that all the Leos that I know seem to have a hard time commiting themselves even if they seem to like the other person and they obviously know that the other person likes them back...i am overly confused with this kind of game maybe because im such a go getter..?
This may sound pompous but i don't settle down easily because i can afford everything i need to live, i can fulfil my sexual needs each weekend, and i'm still young enough to know i can have kids in the years to come. I don't need to rush because i'm not needy. i tend to go on holiday on a whim - thinking about it monday and booking it on tuesday, sometimes jetting off on wednesday. if i had a partner this would be very troublesome. It's soooo confining having a permanent partner that doesn't think like me or have the energy that i have.
Posted by xdimplez
I don't have a hard time committing. I just have trouble finding the right person to committ too.
Hi neurath. How goes it my fellow hair ball?
Lol. It goes well. Dipping in and out as needed
Hope you're well.
It depends, i'll only go for girls that can work me up enough. The recent girl from saturday night had a promise ring on. Though at the time i didn't really pay much attention to it i kind of feel like a bastard now.
See the lion's den post i made and you'll understand that i have specific needs in order to be rev'd up. It's not an exhaustive list but its also not a complete list. I guess i can't really explain how i end up with each individual girl. I did enjoy this recent tattoo'd one though.
The trick is to display leo qualities everywhere the girls go before the main club, and then in the club they'll be more receptive to advances and they'll know they'll have to pull off moves that i like in order to progress. They tend to come to be due to my leo ways even when i'd rather they didn't. I can't sit still for long though lol.
See the lion's den post i made and you'll understand that i have specific needs in order to be rev'd up. It's not an exhaustive list but its also not a complete list. I guess i can't really explain how i end up with each individual girl. I did enjoy this recent tattoo'd one though.
The trick is to display leo qualities everywhere the girls go before the main club, and then in the club they'll be more receptive to advances and they'll know they'll have to pull off moves that i like in order to progress. They tend to come to be due to my leo ways even when i'd rather they didn't. I can't sit still for long though lol.
Well i couldn't get attached because she was part of a hen party and had travelled 175 miles to my neck of the woods. Must have needed a man there and then because her mate was getting married. I don't really understand the motivations for women. I also kind of have a reputation that i want just take *any* girl home with me. I think blanking some beautiful women helps me. It's not easy to keep my attention. Tight clothes and soft skin help with that a lot though.
I'll add that the tattoo'd girl was wearing leopard suede platform boots, leopard silk skirt, and leopard tight top. This is probably why i ended up with her...i'm a leo after all, and that leopard stuff definitely made me want her.
Posted by WoundedLeo
It's not hard to for us to commit at all. But Leoliza said, "when we do, it's forever" so we don't take it lightly, then when it doesn't work out for some reason or other...we're quite devastated. Therefore, we'd rather be on our own than with the wrong person.
As Seraph points out, we won't be with you because we NEED you, we'll be with you because we LOVE you and WANT to be with you.
We don't have commitment problems.
Posted by WoundedLeo
It's not hard to for us to commit at all. But Leoliza said, "when we do, it's forever" so we don't take it lightly, then when it doesn't work out for some reason or other...we're quite devastated. Therefore, we'd rather be on our own than with the wrong person.
As Seraph points out, we won't be with you because we NEED you, we'll be with you because we LOVE you and WANT to be with you.
I agree with all of this. It isn't that we are not willing to commit, we will commit and fiercely loyal in our commitment. When we fall in love, we fall very hard. When that ends, we hurt just as hard. When we are looking for that right person, we are looking at how that person fits into our future and how they will contribute to the life. I call it prowling. I watch and observe your behavior. I would prefer now in my mature age as a "single" woman to take things very slow and evaluate my potential mate. I will watch you very carefully and determine if you are worthy of commitment. Once that determination has been made and I know you can make the same commitment back then we will move forward. If a commitment has been broken, it is very hard to walk away because essentially we are going against everything we stand for.
Posted by tiziani
I've noticed a lot of Leos do that whole "one foot in, one foot out" thing during the buildup to a commitment. I've never really understood why they look backwards in the buildup even if I wouldn't say it's commitment problems. Just surprisingly a lot of nervous energy is expended from a sign that is meant to be all heart.
Yes. Because we are all heart we don't want it broken. This is why we are cautious. Modern times means we can no longer find partners for life or it makes it unlikely. This is why i refuse to rush into anything. I need my heart to heal people. Would struggle to heal and help people if i had a broken heart.
It's very egotistical to say that you're an ego boost to a leo man. I get my ego boosts from books i write, the work i do and the things i do for my family. I'd never pin my ego on a woman because they are unreliable and usually only around to have fun with me. Once i refuse to perform they find someone else that'll perform for them. Some leo's may get a boost from this but it won't last long. My ego, like my heart, needs protecting from external interference tyvm.
Speaking solely for myself. I struggle with commitment because I want the best everything. I want the best clothes, the best house, the best car, the best career and the best partner. I find that once I am with someone , I always think what if better comes along. It's really that simple for me. The sad part is that often times, better was usually not.
I know Mama, I know. I am going to tell you a real life true story.
I had a very good guy friend that I wanted to introduce to a co-worker. My co-worker agreed to go out on a date only if I came too. She said she didn't know the guy. So I went. Well my friend brought along one of his friends. We all started dating. Me and him and them. My co-worker started getting dozens of roses delivered to work. Then he picked her up and took her to lunch. The second weekend after they met he took her to concert out of town. I was so jealous. I took it out on the guy I was dating. It did not matter to me that their incomes were quantum leaps apart. All I could see was all this "stuff" that she was getting and I was not. The relationship ended shortly thereafter. I don't want to be jealous of anyone. Therefore, I need someone who understands that and is willing to make sure I am not. Is that too much to ask?
I'm not quite at the jumping point yet, but I am getting there.
I had a very good guy friend that I wanted to introduce to a co-worker. My co-worker agreed to go out on a date only if I came too. She said she didn't know the guy. So I went. Well my friend brought along one of his friends. We all started dating. Me and him and them. My co-worker started getting dozens of roses delivered to work. Then he picked her up and took her to lunch. The second weekend after they met he took her to concert out of town. I was so jealous. I took it out on the guy I was dating. It did not matter to me that their incomes were quantum leaps apart. All I could see was all this "stuff" that she was getting and I was not. The relationship ended shortly thereafter. I don't want to be jealous of anyone. Therefore, I need someone who understands that and is willing to make sure I am not. Is that too much to ask?
I'm not quite at the jumping point yet, but I am getting there.
I'm very wary of others who "claim" commitment. When I love you I show you consistently and always, when others claim love they show you for the first while (weeks, months, years) and then slack off, change their ways in a very taking for granted manner. You are now theirs so no need to continue to make an effort. when I start to love I will show you with gestures, everyday for the length of that love, so even if its just a cup of tea in bed in the mornings because that's what you love then that is what you will get, for as long as we are together even during an argument, because it brings you happiness and you are the person I love and I want to bring you love, I will want no thanks or rememberance of this act (the tea is merely an example btw ). With others I have found they lavish the demonstrations of love for a while and then, because they think they have won me, it will slack off. Love is to be given freely without any expectation of reward in return. So I used to commit easily but get disappointed easily. Now commitment is to be debated with myself, is it worth it or not. Being alone with myself is not a scary nor undesireable prospect. Being with someone who tries to win you with their own unsustainable gestures is not required nor desireable.
). With others I have found they lavish the demonstrations of love for a while and then, because they think they have won me, it will slack off. Love is to be given freely without any expectation of reward in return. So I used to commit easily but get disappointed easily. Now commitment is to be debated with myself, is it worth it or not. Being alone with myself is not a scary nor undesireable prospect. Being with someone who tries to win you with their own unsustainable gestures is not required nor desireable.Posted by celticlioness
I'm very wary of others who "claim" commitment. When I love you I show you consistently and always, when others claim love they show you for the first while (weeks, months, years) and then slack off, change their ways in a very taking for granted manner. You are now theirs so no need to continue to make an effort. when I start to love I will show you with gestures, everyday for the length of that love, so even if its just a cup of tea in bed in the mornings because that's what you love then that is what you will get, for as long as we are together even during an argument, because it brings you happiness and you are the person I love and I want to bring you love, I will want no thanks or rememberance of this act (the tea is merely an example btw
I have trouble with this too. As a leo i love to love, and i love to write poetry and be romantic. But doing this too often or predictably makes a woman run away too. There's a fine line that i haven't found yet. It's difficult, difficult, lemon difficult. I guess i haven't found the right woman yet.
Posted by Nala13
I know Mama, I know. I am going to tell you a real life true story.
I had a very good guy friend that I wanted to introduce to a co-worker. My co-worker agreed to go out on a date only if I came too. She said she didn't know the guy. So I went. Well my friend brought along one of his friends. We all started dating. Me and him and them. My co-worker started getting dozens of roses delivered to work. Then he picked her up and took her to lunch. The second weekend after they met he took her to concert out of town. I was so jealous. I took it out on the guy I was dating. It did not matter to me that their incomes were quantum leaps apart. All I could see was all this "stuff" that she was getting and I was not. The relationship ended shortly thereafter. I don't want to be jealous of anyone. Therefore, I need someone who understands that and is willing to make sure I am not. Is that too much to ask?
I'm not quite at the jumping point yet, but I am getting there.
Oh Nala, just read this, your point on this girl getting the flowers, whisked off etc. is exactly what I am trying to say, do not do that for me if you can't continue it, I want to see how you love forever not just in the beginning before you decide to lay down with no further effort and get fat on the couch. Don't be jealous of her, that kind of beginning is false and inflated romance. How he treats you everyday is what is important and that you like it, when he continues to treat you like this going on and on and on for years despite ups and downs, when he is angry with you and still brings you a cup of tea (can't get away from this example
, this is showing enduring and real love, consistency even in the face of discord. It's not too much to ask, but grand gestures of love are unsustainable, look for the little ones and that they are consistent.Posted by WoundedLeoPosted by celticlioness
...grand gestures of love are unsustainable, look for the little ones and that they are consistent.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ This boys and girls!!!!
Don't forget these golden words.click to expand
Ok WL, I'll en-grain them for future use
Signed Up: Nov 17, 2012
Comments: 22 · Posts: 6178 · Topics: 30
Comments: 22 · Posts: 6178 · Topics: 30
Leos... trouble committing? Surely you jest?
Oh Nala, just read this, your point on this girl getting the flowers, whisked off etc. is exactly what I am trying to say, do not do that for me if you can't continue it, I want to see how you love forever not just in the beginning before you decide to lay down with no further effort and get fat on the couch. Don't be jealous of her, that kind of beginning is false and inflated romance. How he treats you everyday is what is important and that you like it, when he continues to treat you like this going on and on and on for years despite ups and downs, when he is angry with you and still brings you a cup of tea (can't get away from this example
+1 This is wise and I've found it to be true too. It goes for women as well as men.
I've never had a problem with committing, it always depended on the other persons level of commitment. If I feel abandoned, or if there is no connection or communication, it's pretty much dead.
Posted by Grey
clueless cancer shut the fuck up and get lost. cancer is the most unattractive sign in the zodaic.
Hahahaha not to be mean but +1, I hate Cancer clingzos, they aren't boring per se, mmmm nevermind yeah they are LOL
I am a Leo woman. And I have no problem committing with someone, I truly love. I won't date or talk to anyone, I have no plans dating. I don't like playing games with people. I am rare as a Leo, i think.
It takes a long time for me to commit, kinda like capricorn. We need to be friends first or it will just be a come and go thing.
Posted by tizianiOooh... I like this.
"There are no pacts between lions and men"
Posted by gyspygirl84Rare.
I am a Leo woman. And I have no problem committing with someone, I truly love. I won't date or talk to anyone, I have no plans dating. I don't like playing games with people. I am rare as a Leo, i think.
How, exactly?
I have zero issues with commitment
Posted by NeurathI always thought it was my Sag rising/moon that made me hate commitment. But I agree with the post above. I feel it's sooo confining having a partner, especially if they don't MATCH ME. If I want to go on a trip on a whim, I don't want to have to deal with asking permissions, opinions, dealing with their emotions of feeling left out, or they don't have the funds.. I'm good as I am but we can be friends. Also freedom is at the top of my list, it goes hand and hand with love. I want to feel free to do as I please as well as my partner to feel free... now that doesn't mean no loyalty. But only a special someone will understand what that means for the both of us.
This may sound pompous but i don't settle down easily because i can afford everything i need to live, i can fulfil my sexual needs each weekend, and i'm still young enough to know i can have kids in the years to come. I don't need to rush because i'm not needy. i tend to go on holiday on a whim - thinking about it monday and booking it on tuesday, sometimes jetting off on wednesday. if i had a partner this would be very troublesome. It's soooo confining having a permanent partner that doesn't think like me or have the energy that i have.
I can commit, I just need to know that the person is right for me. Leos are looking for a strong partner who can match us. For me a woman who is confident enough to practically imply or state that I'm hers, will have my FULL attention.
I try to be hesitant with committing but when someone sweeps me off my feet I fall head first. Crazy how I keep opening up my big ars heart like it never been hurt before. IDK if this is true and if it is it could be because they're just careful and aware because a Leo loves hard and hurts hard.
Posted by tiziani"and get it right the first time"
Because they are Lions. And also they feel like they have a lot to give. Very often, they do. The other person just has to be in the right space to receive it, and get it right the first time.
Thats the key. Even if you don't know it…they expect you to receive them perfectly/in a timely manner.
Posted by ScorpicoYep. Otherwise, if you have to "think" about if we are right for you then most likely we aren't. Who wants that?Posted by tiziani"and get it right the first time"
Because they are Lions. And also they feel like they have a lot to give. Very often, they do. The other person just has to be in the right space to receive it, and get it right the first time.
Thats the key. Even if you don't know it…they expect you to receive them perfectly/in a timely manner.click to expand
Posted by Ssupermansomeone who gets it right the first time all the time sounds hard to come by.Posted by ScorpicoYep. Otherwise, if you have to "think" about if we are right for you then most likely we aren't. Who wants that?Posted by tiziani"and get it right the first time"
Because they are Lions. And also they feel like they have a lot to give. Very often, they do. The other person just has to be in the right space to receive it, and get it right the first time.
Thats the key. Even if you don't know it…they expect you to receive them perfectly/in a timely manner.click to expand
its kind of a persnickety approach.
does that leave you always searching for the perfect person?
Posted by ScorpicoNo, but it should be mutual. If one person has to do all this thinking then they're having doubts. Not a good way to start things offPosted by Ssupermansomeone who gets it right the first time all the time sounds hard to come by.Posted by ScorpicoYep. Otherwise, if you have to "think" about if we are right for you then most likely we aren't. Who wants that?Posted by tiziani"and get it right the first time"
Because they are Lions. And also they feel like they have a lot to give. Very often, they do. The other person just has to be in the right space to receive it, and get it right the first time.
Thats the key. Even if you don't know it…they expect you to receive them perfectly/in a timely manner.
its kind of a persnickety approach.
does that leave you always searching for the perfect person?click to expand
I can say that there are a couple factors as to why Leos tend to have this reputation of non-commitment (or struggles to)
- Leos burn up their love fast because we like to make sure others are entertained. That is why Leos are very passionate and it lures people in. Once that energy burns out it means creativity and interests runs out.
- Leos attracts a lot of people, I don't know how or why but there is always multiple people in line and that makes us indecisive. Because there is so many options, we also feel (maybe subconsciously) that if this person doesn't interests us that much then there's others waiting that might. (If Leos are really in love with the person though, they won't stray and commitment isn't an issue)
- Others signs are not aware of this but we tend to internalise our hurts, and will pretend that everything is fine. We will think we are ready to give love and receive love and shove all traumas under a carpet. Then when we meet someone we like we tend to self-sabotage due to unresolved issues and unknowingly take it out on that person and drive them away. Then we ask ourselves why it didn't work out. It's very subtle but Leos do this a lot. Some don't even realise they are doing it.
- Leos don't like being alone. I think it depresses us ? Some Leos are less like this than others, but they want the stability of a relationship with someone to pamper them but still want to have that freedom to connect with others who might grab their attention if they don't love the person they are with. (Leos often confuses love with lust)
- Leos don't like feeling like they are being owned. It feels that we are getting hidden away or becoming more boring. Clingyness, telling them what they should or shouldn't do, possesiveness scares us. A little display of jealousy flatters us because it shows that you care, but once you get into an arguement with them as to why you saw them flirting, or getting mad that they're receiving attention from others, Leos response will be 'you don't own me, so why the hell are you questioning me?' Or 'you should be proud and show me of, not Getting jealous'.
- Leos have a knack for getting involved with someone they can't have. Wether it is personal circumstances, or whatnot. If they are attracted to someone, they will not stay grounded and charge in anyways. Most of the time because they think things might magically change and it will work out. It generally dont.
- It's hard for Leos to find someone who will love them as much as they love themselves. This really is the bottom line. Commitment doesn't last long or never manifests because it will be very apparent early on wether the person can give Leos the amount of love they expect to get.
- Leos burn up their love fast because we like to make sure others are entertained. That is why Leos are very passionate and it lures people in. Once that energy burns out it means creativity and interests runs out.
- Leos attracts a lot of people, I don't know how or why but there is always multiple people in line and that makes us indecisive. Because there is so many options, we also feel (maybe subconsciously) that if this person doesn't interests us that much then there's others waiting that might. (If Leos are really in love with the person though, they won't stray and commitment isn't an issue)
- Others signs are not aware of this but we tend to internalise our hurts, and will pretend that everything is fine. We will think we are ready to give love and receive love and shove all traumas under a carpet. Then when we meet someone we like we tend to self-sabotage due to unresolved issues and unknowingly take it out on that person and drive them away. Then we ask ourselves why it didn't work out. It's very subtle but Leos do this a lot. Some don't even realise they are doing it.
- Leos don't like being alone. I think it depresses us ? Some Leos are less like this than others, but they want the stability of a relationship with someone to pamper them but still want to have that freedom to connect with others who might grab their attention if they don't love the person they are with. (Leos often confuses love with lust)
- Leos don't like feeling like they are being owned. It feels that we are getting hidden away or becoming more boring. Clingyness, telling them what they should or shouldn't do, possesiveness scares us. A little display of jealousy flatters us because it shows that you care, but once you get into an arguement with them as to why you saw them flirting, or getting mad that they're receiving attention from others, Leos response will be 'you don't own me, so why the hell are you questioning me?' Or 'you should be proud and show me of, not Getting jealous'.
- Leos have a knack for getting involved with someone they can't have. Wether it is personal circumstances, or whatnot. If they are attracted to someone, they will not stay grounded and charge in anyways. Most of the time because they think things might magically change and it will work out. It generally dont.
- It's hard for Leos to find someone who will love them as much as they love themselves. This really is the bottom line. Commitment doesn't last long or never manifests because it will be very apparent early on wether the person can give Leos the amount of love they expect to get.
Posted by MontgomeryPosted by gyspygirl84Rare.
I am a Leo woman. And I have no problem committing with someone, I truly love. I won't date or talk to anyone, I have no plans dating. I don't like playing games with people. I am rare as a Leo, i think.
How, exactly?click to expand
Right. These are typical Leo traits ?
Posted by BadCeceI couldn't have said it any better ????
I can say that there are a couple factors as to why Leos tend to have this reputation of non-commitment (or struggles to)
- Leos burn up their love fast because we like to make sure others are entertained. That is why Leos are very passionate and it lures people in. Once that energy burns out it means creativity and interests runs out.
- Leos attracts a lot of people, I don't know how or why but there is always multiple people in line and that makes us indecisive. Because there is so many options, we also feel (maybe subconsciously) that if this person doesn't interests us that much then there's others waiting that might. (If Leos are really in love with the person though, they won't stray and commitment isn't an issue)
- Others signs are not aware of this but we tend to internalise our hurts, and will pretend that everything is fine. We will think we are ready to give love and receive love and shove all traumas under a carpet. Then when we meet someone we like we tend to self-sabotage due to unresolved issues and unknowingly take it out on that person and drive them away. Then we ask ourselves why it didn't work out. It's very subtle but Leos do this a lot. Some don't even realise they are doing it.
- Leos don't like being alone. I think it depresses us ? Some Leos are less like this than others, but they want the stability of a relationship with someone to pamper them but still want to have that freedom to connect with others who might grab their attention if they don't love the person they are with. (Leos often confuses love with lust)
- Leos don't like feeling like they are being owned. It feels that we are getting hidden away or becoming more boring. Clingyness, telling them what they should or shouldn't do, possesiveness scares us. A little display of jealousy flatters us because it shows that you care, but once you get into an arguement with them as to why you saw them flirting, or getting mad that they're receiving attention from others, Leos response will be 'you don't own me, so why the hell are you questioning me?' Or 'you should be proud and show me of, not Getting jealous'.
- Leos have a knack for getting involved with someone they can't have. Wether it is personal circumstances, or whatnot. If they are attracted to someone, they will not stay grounded and charge in anyways. Most of the time because they think things might magically change and it will work out. It generally dont.
- It's hard for Leos to find someone who will love them as much as they love themselves. This really is the bottom line. Commitment doesn't last long or never manifests because it will be very apparent early on wether the person can give Leos the amount of love they expect to get.
Posted by vybz
Theyre full of shit n r liars...cats r sly n always lurking
Good question. It's funny that I have read so many general sun-sign things that say Leo is so loyal and so relationship-oriented.
I have been wondering whether or not I am a commitment-phobe or not.
I just wonder if there even is a such thing as one person who will meet me on all levels (physical, emotional, mental) but then again I think my standards are skewed... I have been attracting more attention than usual lately but when I try to picture myself with these guys and I'm like "meh"... don't really feel a need to pursue anything. I came out of a situation where I was about to be married and sometimes when I was with them, I was trying to drown out the thoughts of "I feel trapped". Didn't work.
It would probably just take the right person. But Leo is not a sign that has a easy time with long term relationships. Sure we like attention but then we don't like to be bored or caged in (even if we have "clingy" or "jealous" tendencies ourselves).
Sorry if this answer was convoluted. I guess the short version is, it takes the right one and we are more high maintenance than most.
I have been wondering whether or not I am a commitment-phobe or not.
I just wonder if there even is a such thing as one person who will meet me on all levels (physical, emotional, mental) but then again I think my standards are skewed... I have been attracting more attention than usual lately but when I try to picture myself with these guys and I'm like "meh"... don't really feel a need to pursue anything. I came out of a situation where I was about to be married and sometimes when I was with them, I was trying to drown out the thoughts of "I feel trapped". Didn't work.
It would probably just take the right person. But Leo is not a sign that has a easy time with long term relationships. Sure we like attention but then we don't like to be bored or caged in (even if we have "clingy" or "jealous" tendencies ourselves).
Sorry if this answer was convoluted. I guess the short version is, it takes the right one and we are more high maintenance than most.
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