One more shot!

This topic was created in the Pisces forum by lv24 on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 and has 51 replies.
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So my Pisces and I decided to give it another shot. We had lunch on my birthday and apologized to one another. I really appreciated his apology because he acknowledged that he could have treated me a lot better on his birthday. He admitted to not including me on his special day but said it was because he wasn't exactly sure were we stood and his fear of relationships sometimes takes control of the way he acts. He recently came out of a relationship with a young female who left a bad taste in his mouth. Aside from that he admitted (finally) that he had been struggling between the two of us not sure of what he wanted or who he wanted. He said he was no longer in love with her but just comfortable and said that he realized by being with me how a relationship should be and how it feels to be treated right. He said for so long he knew she wasn't the one but that he wanted to change her. They were off and on for 2 years and he and I have been dating for about 8 months. Admitting to never being with us at the same time (sure). They were off and on and so were we but I have come to realize that the only reason why he and I were off and on was because they were off an on. We were never in a committed relationship nor have they been for some time now. Anyhow at lunch I told him that I was really fond of him and that I have grown to have a love for him that is unexplainable to me. I knew the entire time he and I were dating that he was battling with his feelings but I wasn't a hundred percent sure because he never talked about it. Now I know and understand his disappearing acts and his lack of being able to communicate. I told him that no matter how much I care for him I am not going to continue to play this game. I know what I want and if he doesn't want the same I am done with this relationship. I also told him that I will no longer continue to share the one I have grown so fond of. I asked him were he stood with the ex girlfriend and he said they were absolutely no longer together or even talking. She gave him an ultimatum, she wants to start over and have a committed relationship. He said no due to the damage in the relationship and that he has come to realize in the past 3 weeks that we had absolutely no contact that I am the one he wants to be with and that it took me standing my ground for him to realize what he had been losing and what he had been trying to hold on to (comfort). Anyhow I am giving it another shot but this time with commitment
attached to the situation. I am so scared!!!! We have been together since that talk and everything has been great! In two weeks I have only slept in my own bed once all the other nights I have been spending the night at his home. After I get out of work we meet up for dinner catch a movie, socialize with friends or family, play video games or anything else that comes to mind. We are spending so much time together its kind of scary. The scary thing is that I always hear that Pisces will be all for it one day and then disappear the next. He knows how scared I am and he will occasionally look at me and say ?I am not going anywhere?. It feels good but is it for real? Did I finally get what I have been wanting for some time now or is he using me to get over her? IM SCARED! I sometime catch him staring at me, its weird. I will ask him what and he says nothing, can't I look at you. What do you guys think should I be scared or should I take it and run with it? It feels like he's into me but I could just be acting like a na?ve little girl. What do you think?
Oh one more thing we agreed to not dwell on the past but move forward. Its hard to do because I am hurt by the whole thing. I shouldnt be right? Its not like we were commited we were just dating. It still hurts though becasue i had feelings for him...i feel like he was cheating even though he wasnt. I feel like i am trying to convince myself that it was ok for him to do...lol! anyhow he said that i can make issues out of anything i want from this point on out...lol! but to please not bring up the past because then we wont have a successful realationship. Is he pulling a fast one over on me? lol!
"should I be scared or should I take it and run with it?"
Both!
Being in love is super scary and exhilerating at the same time .. if we stop fearing the intensity and power of the passion .. it will quickly wane. Just look to your side and see his shining eyes telling you he's running with you. smile
lv24 .. everybody has a past, his is the one bothering you because it's the one that's effecting you .. but, I'm sure that you have a past, too, that is better left where it is. If you both want this to work and be fulfilling .. then you have to start from this moment .. leave history in it's place.
Besides .. a person IS the person they are today BECAUSE of their past. If he didn't have his past, and you didn't have your past .. you would both be entirely different people today.
Rock on, girl .. I can see your smile way over here. smile
But P-Angel you dont think it should bother me that he had gone back to her in between one of our fights? That doesnt feel like a past to me that feels like betrayal. What makes me think that he wont go back again. He told me in the past that they were over so how come i should believe him this time. Maybe they are just fighting. The scary part is that I really do believe him becasue he is showing it with his actions but i am just SCARED! Dont get me wrong i agree with you a hundred percent about leaving the past in the past...it just hurts to know that he was with another in between US. Although we were not commited to one another i still remained true to only him. I am supper happy right now though....I GOT MY MAN!!! YAH!!! I know i sound so wishy washy right now but that's because i have a million and one thoughts running through my mind. sorry! Thanks for the positive posts smile
"Just look to your side and see his shining eyes telling you he's running with you."

That sound so romatic smile I am excited
I am positive to posts where people say good things about their partners ..
Negative when a person says bad things about their partners because they aren't here to defend themselves .. such as the last time we talked about this.
"you dont think it should bother me that he had gone back to her in between one of our fights? That doesnt feel like a past to me that feels like betrayal."
Here's a different way to think about this .. you don't know what is your favorite if you have nothing to compare it to. If you've only tasted ONE, then how do you know that something else is better? It was BECAUSE of you that he now realizes exactly why he wasn't happy with her .. he now has this "lovin feelin" to compare it to. Had he not gone back to her when he did and the two of you tried to force each other into learning to love each other .. it might NOT have ever happened.
"The scary part is that I really do believe him becasue he is showing it with his actions but i am just SCARED!"
And this is how you know it to be true .. before when you were with him, he didn't make you feel this way. That's because he didn't realize just how much he loves you until he went back to someone who didn't love him as deeply.
Sad, that we as humans do this .. we don't realize what we had until it's gone.
He realized, lv24 .. and so do you .. just embrace the love and live every moment like it's your last one.
ok smile thanks
I think I just need some reinforcement about my feeling towards the situation. thanks again.
Just trust in the love that you have now, instead of dis-trusting what you had before .. which isn't any where near as strong, then, as now.
"It still hurts though becasue i had feelings for him...i feel like he was cheating even though he wasnt. I feel like i am trying to convince myself that it was ok for him to do...lol!"
If you focus on the pain of the past, then you'll miss the joy of the future.
He didn't cheat on you, lv24 .. the two of you broke up. That's not the same .. so, STOP freaking out for nothing. That's why he said, "i can make issues out of anything i want from this point on out...lol! but to please not bring up the past because then we wont have a successful realationship."
He said, "I am not going anywhere", and he meant it .. trust it.
glad you're giving it another try... us pisces, confusing little creatures man. i confuse my own self sometimes.
the stare is good. absolutely. i stare at the bull sometimes, wondering how i found a wonderful guy like him... then sometimes i wonder, what the hell am i going to do with his stubborn ass... either way, at the end of the day, i decide to keep him. lol yay for pisces!
i think its a bad idea and everyone is wrong...........wait you'll see.
although with all that aries in u....you might be able to move foward.
CJ
Can you tell me why you think this? Your not giving me much to work with...
I'm completely lost now .. I thought I knew what was going on, but, somehow this took a turn that left me in the dust.
Who's hating? What?
Never mind .. cause my mind is obviously somewhere else.
All I know is that it feels so right smilewho knows what or where it will lead to but I am willing to take that chance.
The only thing that I am bothered with is that I have noticed that he likes to try to get me jealous. Maybe its just him trying to be playful but it just seems silly. He will make comments and then look at me to see my reaction all the while having a huge smile on his face. I always respond with a sarcatic response or throw something that will make him jealous right back at him then he gets all sensitive....so i have to say just kidding baby and jump on him and kiss him and tickle him so that he can feel secure again. You guys are a whole lot of work.......but worth it smileAre you guys known for trying to make your partners jealous? I thought that was an Aries thing...
Yeah I guess...
I just find it funny because he knows he's doing it....punk! Its a sight to see with his HUGE SMILE from ear to ear. WHO DOES THAT???!!! Lol! I cant complain though I am loving it right now smile
Perhaps, not just exclusive to a jealousy thing .. probably moreso, we'll attempt to excerpt expression from our partner, beit verbal or physical .. pretty much all the time. Because we use our "feelers", for just about everything, we will try to move a person, good or bad, if we feel the other person is devoid, or just zoning.
For instance, if my husband is just sitting there like a zombie, that's when I'll say something shocking to him, or inappropriate .. it's to snap him out. Though, I certainly understand "zoning", or "spacing" being a Pisces .. the difference is that the non-Pisces people get stuck where they are just vegetating, and will have little awareness of their surroundings, where with Pisces, though we do this all the time, it's different in the respect that we don't get stuck, nor are we completely under the enchantment of whatever has you overpowered in a day-dream of your mind .. we have a handle on that in such a way, that it would be like being in a movie theatre to you. You can "watch" a movie, but still have total awareness outside the movie .. that's our daydreams. Whereas with you and other non-Pisces, when you're daydreaming .. you're gone and someone has to poke you or yell at you to get your attention .. see?
So, perhaps, this might be a reason why he's doing this .. it's to pluck a reaction out to make sure you're not stuck somewhere, twittling your hair, compleley oblivious. Try to pay attention the next time he does this to see where you were, and what you were doing. We're really bad about that. People think we're creating a scene, such as with your boyfriend, you see him as trying to create something that's upsetting to you, when he might just be trying to tug on you to make sure you're still there.
That's why when you look over at him, he has this big broad grin ..
.. ok, she's still there and I love her bunches
.. then maybe even a big smoooooooooch
The funny thing is that he always has my attention. This guy has me right where he wants me and he knows it, that little punk! Lol! I am crazy about him.
Lets see....
EXAMPLE: He was recently looking for a new assistant and he would make comments like she needed to meet certain criteria. Then he would throw something out there like she needed to have big boobs and work late hours. He would say that they needed to fax over there measurements. Not exactly his words but close...his words were a bit more clever but it would be something silly like that. Then he would look at me to see my reaction while holding a huge grin and laughing. Then he would jump on me and say just kidding baby and of course I knew he was just kidding but why would you say that....
It doesnt bother me its silly. I just think that if I was the type of person that would let things like that get to me then we would have a problem because then I would always be wondering what the heck he was doing with his assistant and always be wondering if they were fooling around....

Its not that big of a deal I role with the punches and laugh at him. I just think its funny. I am the complete opposite I try to make him feel secure. I think its just a guy thing because my ex used to do that too. MEN will be MEN!
I think its just his way of being playful...
"Then he would throw something out there like she needed to have big boobs and work late hours. He would say that they needed to fax over there measurements."

OMG, that's hilarious .. lucky bitch .. I'm stuck with a stick-in-the-mud, who would put his glasses on which are kept in shirt pocket all dorky and shit, then prune up lips and say something so fucking serious, you really have to laugh at it because it's all there is to laugh at.
I'll trade .. mine comes with money a car and everything.
Naughty little boy .. Tongue
"put his glasses on which are kept in shirt pocket all dorky and butter, then prune up lips and say something so ing serious"
LoL!
"I'll trade .. mine comes with money a car and everything."
Hmmmmmmmmm........let me think.
NO THANKS!
I am not giving this one up without a fight! Lol!
"holding a huge grin and laughing. Then he would jump on me"
Serious .. I'll pay for the boys to move, even.
Can you hanlde a 50 year old Virgo? I swear to God Winking that so long as you put-out at least once a week .. you'd be a Goddess and he'd never look at another woman, nor say anything that would cause "it" to leave .. money, even .. tons.
An I get someone with spirit .. and a sense of "freedom"
Oh, man .. I tried to make it attractive
"Serious .. I'll pay for the boys to move, even. "
LMAO!!!!!!!!!
Oh well .. there's always tomorrow

* sullenly hangs head
I lucked out girl I have a guy who makes me happy and on the plus side he is very well off.......YES!!! Just Kidding!!! Being well off is just an added perk. I love him for the person he is or I should say the person he has been showing me he could be.
"sullenly hangs head"
You're silly!!! Lol! Thanks for the laught today smile
oops....laughs
Girl .. you got a great one. Believe me, if you were living with a person with absolutely NO sense of humor .. you would eventually rot .. trust me, I know.
But, you have someone who knows himself so well that he fears no threat to his masculinity .. he can poke around with this kind of humor and knows that you know, that it's no threat to your feminity.
People who are trying to make you do that, don't do it that way. If someone's trying to make you jealous, they aren't going to be smiling from ear to ear and then rip your clothes off .. they are looking for a mixture of anger & enamourment .. he's playing, being naughty .. it's apparantly hot to him, 'cause it caused him to jump on you.
See, I guess I just look at things differently.
You see something along the lines of that because he did this action, that he's trying to make you jealous.
Where I see .. when he said this, it turned him on, because he then jumped on me .. Huummmm, maybe he likes dirty talk, perhaps later when he comes over tonight I can pretend to be an assistant coming in for an interview .. oh, I could work late that night, too. Winking
Yah maybe your right. I think our sex life is great! I think he is pretty satisfied as well. I have wanted to wear lingerie for him I havent gotten the guttttssssssssss to do it because I dont know how to go about it. Thats one area I am not too sure of. Do I tell him hold on while I go change...that just seems silly to me. Help! Suggestions please.
Oh and another thing I am not very insecure about myself but the lingerie thing intimidates me because his ex girlfriend models lingerie.....I dont want him to be disappointed. I have no idea what she looks like but the image that sticks in my head is LINDERIE MODEL! Lol!
I KNOW I SOUND SILLY RIGHT NOW!!!! TELL ME TO STOP!!!!!!!!
Listen .. do this ..
The next time he comes over, be all showered and shaved and all, but, just in regular clothes. Give him a beer, or whatever he drinks and when he sits on your couch, hand him a piece of paper ..
Then hurry to your room, put on sexy underwear (what kind of lingerie is it that you have?) and then a mini-mini skirt and button down blouse .. unbuttoned to just cleavage, put your hair up in something really loose, put on stockings and garder, high heels .. quickly.
He's out there reading your resume .. it will take him a few minutes ..
Walk in and introduce yourself .. you're there for the job interview. Be assertive and keep talking about qualifications .. sit across from him, make sure he gets tiny peeks occasionally during the job interview by switching your crossed legs back and forth and leaning down to pick up your drink on the table.
Don't worry .. he'll know exactly what to do and start asking you about your "other" qualifications .. have fun Tongue
"I am not very insecure about myself but the lingerie thing intimidates me because his ex girlfriend models lingerie"
Then don't model with it .. Pisces LOVES role playing.
What does your lingerie look like.
P-Angel you will love this one since you seem to like a sense of humor. So last night I go over his house he gets in the shower while I get comfortable in bed. So he gets out of the shower and comes over to me while my eyes are closed because I am starting to dose off while he's in the shower.....all of a sudden.......I feel pressure on my face....I open my eyes to a bare ass directly on my face........gross!!! Keep in mind I am a germ freak and he knows it thats why he does stuff like that. Lol! Silly boys!!!! Lol! It sound a bit more gross than it actually was. It was funny actually.
I dont have much I am actually fairly new to the lingerie world. I have little simple things. What I need to buy are naughty costumes...hmmmmm. I have some shopping to do.....be right back!! Just kidding. No really I am going to look into buying something I can role play in. Thanks for the advice on this subject.
"Then don't model with it"
Never thought about it like that. You're right there's a diffrence between the two. Hmmmmmmmmm....
"crossed legs back and forth and leaning down to pick up your drink on the table"
You seem just a little too good at this stuff....lol! P-Angel has a freaky side. Lol!
"he gets out of the shower and .....all of a sudden.......I feel pressure on my face....I open my eyes to a bare ass directly on my face........"

lol, damn, he's giving you signs all over the board .. you got to love those Fish, eh? There's no guessing what we like, you just have to watch. Doesn't sound gross at all.
< salad tosser

You don't need fancy lingerie or role playing outfits, necessarily .. just SEXY bra and matching thong .. maybe some leather straps hanging around wouldn't hurt .. roles don't have to include certain clothes .. you could be his sex slave, that doesn't require much.
"< salad tosser"
LMAO!
Really I wouldnt have even thought of that...I just thought he was being silly. He was laughing his ass off. I was trying to break free and he was applying more pressure. Then got off and took off running. Keep in mind this is a 32 year old grown man....lol! He's silly smile
Your guy has it made. You must do role playing for him. Lucky guy smile
I'm sure he was just playing and being silly .. but, then there's the subtle clues
For instance .. every person, male or female, that I've ever slept with are normally very 'shy' about their anus being in somebody's face if they didn't feel 'comfortable' in that position.
Think about that .........
Oh, please .. I'm married to a Virgo .. he wouldn't know erotic if it came up and sat on his face.
He'd have to find his shirt, you know, where the glasses are kept in their little case, along with his ink pens .. and make note .. "Angel's getting frisky again. I guess she needs a talking to about being a lady again."
Then I rush to toilet to puke.
Do it, do it, lv24 .. alls you need is sexy bra and panties and your resume.
He probably likes anal penetration, too .. every male Pisces I know does. There's all kinds of fun stuff you can do and all's you need is your imagination.
"He'd have to find his shirt, you know, where the glasses are kept in their little case, along with his ink pens .. and make note .. "Angel's getting frisky again. I guess she needs a talking to about being a lady again."
LMAO! Thats pretty bad P-Angel....
im not hating anyone.....just stating my opinion, i am a student of human behavior and its my opinion that he will pull the same kind of stuff he did before. just because im the only one not saying go for it.....doesnt make me hate anyone unless u dont like someone who has a different opinion than yours which im sure is the right one. smile
wow thats a late answer huh?
"its my opinion that he will pull the same kind of stuff he did before"

Perhaps, he will and perhaps, he won't .. it really doesn't matter in the whole scheme of things in life, for nothing lasts forever. A person can't decide how long another person will be dedicated and commited to them, so it's really a matter of what kind of happiness can you find with this person while it lasts.
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