Can someone help me to understand what is going on in his Aquarian mind?
This topic was created in the Aquarius forum by MondayMorning on Thursday, October 26, 2017 and has 127 replies.
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Appreciate any Aquas who can give me some understanding of this because I am so confused by this guy I don't know whether he is just a manipulative person or whether I am not understanding him correctly. I am a Scorpio sun / Scorpio Venus / Mars Leo. He is an Aqua sun / Aqua Venus / Mars Pisces.
Basically, we met about a year ago and dated for a few months and and off. The attraction was very strong between us (especially on his side) and we got on great in general, but basically we butted heads on the terms of our relationship. I won't lie - I think I was possessive and demanding (sorry I am Scorpio, we do this) but I think he was also a bit unreasonable in expecting total freedom at the same time as sharing my bed which I was no way going to accept.
He had a lot of angst about whether or not he could commit to exclusivity with me - for whatever reason he saw this as a HUGE deal. He said I wanted too much too soon. Maybe I did, but at the same time I am not sleeping with any guy who is dating other women and that isn't negotiable.
He was pretty vocal about his various doubts moving forward. He was worried I was too intense (I am intense I admit). He was worried our relationship was too sexual without enough connection mentally. These doubts made me a bit angry at the time - we'd been dating a few weeks and had 5 or 6 dates and he definitely avoided too much intimacy emotionally. I always felt like I was trying to get closer to him and couldn't.
In the end, we split for a month and then he came back asking to see me again, he almost committed to trying dating me exclusively but then he panicked and disappeared on me without saying goodbye. I let him go without a word - his choice!
Six months passed and he sent me a message to tell me he had treated me disrespectfully and had been "a dick" and he was sorry for it. I accepted his apology and told him I hoped he was well. He said he felt maybe we had jumped into sex because the attraction was so strong and maybe we should have been friends first. I agreed. He said he got spooked, and he was just really truly sorry for it.
Over the next six months, he kept talking to me. He opened up quite a lot and I guess we became friends. He told me he hadn't been exclusive with anyone for years and found the idea made him feel trapped. Sometimes he told me he thought about me a lot and felt "nostalgic". Sometimes he told me that he fantastized all the time about me. Sometimes he asked me out, sometimes as friends or sometimes asked me to take a romantic trip away with him for a weekend so we could get to know each other.
I refused to see him because the truth is that I actually really like him and didn't want to get hurt. I felt like he rejected me once and now all he wanted was more of the great sex. I felt pretty sure if I did agree to see him, we'd end up in bed and then he'd disappear again.
Then I was really sick one day, feeling really low and sorry for myself, and he texted me that night by chance and when I said how I was feeling he just showed up at my house (first time seeing him for a year) and he basically took care of me.
He got me hot drinks, he brought food, he cleaned up, he held my hand and let me sleep on his chest and he just kept kissing me and stroking my face and hair. He didn't try anything sexual but he was incredibly kind and affectionate. We had a really intimate talk where he opened up on lots of stuff that was very personal and I honestly felt like I was falling in love that night.
I asked him why he did that for me, given the zero possibility of sex, and he said it was because I was a "nice person" and he said caring for people practically was his way of showing he cared about them and he wanted me to know that despite him behaving like a dick generally, he did like me a lot.
During that night he asked if we could do some things together as friends - like play sports or take a trip or swim together. He literally does NOT have women friends, so it was nice he wants to hang out but I also wondered a bit if this means he is no longer attracted to me romantically! ?? We did kiss, but that's all.
Since that night, 5 days has passed and I haven't heard a word from him and it made me feel really sad and confused.
What is all this about? I am just honestly confused about what this guy wants from me. For a long time I thought it was sex, but I don't understand why he came over to play nurse only to ignore me after. Is this some kind of jerk here or am I missing something?
Basically, we met about a year ago and dated for a few months and and off. The attraction was very strong between us (especially on his side) and we got on great in general, but basically we butted heads on the terms of our relationship. I won't lie - I think I was possessive and demanding (sorry I am Scorpio, we do this) but I think he was also a bit unreasonable in expecting total freedom at the same time as sharing my bed which I was no way going to accept.
He had a lot of angst about whether or not he could commit to exclusivity with me - for whatever reason he saw this as a HUGE deal. He said I wanted too much too soon. Maybe I did, but at the same time I am not sleeping with any guy who is dating other women and that isn't negotiable.
He was pretty vocal about his various doubts moving forward. He was worried I was too intense (I am intense I admit). He was worried our relationship was too sexual without enough connection mentally. These doubts made me a bit angry at the time - we'd been dating a few weeks and had 5 or 6 dates and he definitely avoided too much intimacy emotionally. I always felt like I was trying to get closer to him and couldn't.
In the end, we split for a month and then he came back asking to see me again, he almost committed to trying dating me exclusively but then he panicked and disappeared on me without saying goodbye. I let him go without a word - his choice!
Six months passed and he sent me a message to tell me he had treated me disrespectfully and had been "a dick" and he was sorry for it. I accepted his apology and told him I hoped he was well. He said he felt maybe we had jumped into sex because the attraction was so strong and maybe we should have been friends first. I agreed. He said he got spooked, and he was just really truly sorry for it.
Over the next six months, he kept talking to me. He opened up quite a lot and I guess we became friends. He told me he hadn't been exclusive with anyone for years and found the idea made him feel trapped. Sometimes he told me he thought about me a lot and felt "nostalgic". Sometimes he told me that he fantastized all the time about me. Sometimes he asked me out, sometimes as friends or sometimes asked me to take a romantic trip away with him for a weekend so we could get to know each other.
I refused to see him because the truth is that I actually really like him and didn't want to get hurt. I felt like he rejected me once and now all he wanted was more of the great sex. I felt pretty sure if I did agree to see him, we'd end up in bed and then he'd disappear again.
Then I was really sick one day, feeling really low and sorry for myself, and he texted me that night by chance and when I said how I was feeling he just showed up at my house (first time seeing him for a year) and he basically took care of me.
He got me hot drinks, he brought food, he cleaned up, he held my hand and let me sleep on his chest and he just kept kissing me and stroking my face and hair. He didn't try anything sexual but he was incredibly kind and affectionate. We had a really intimate talk where he opened up on lots of stuff that was very personal and I honestly felt like I was falling in love that night.
I asked him why he did that for me, given the zero possibility of sex, and he said it was because I was a "nice person" and he said caring for people practically was his way of showing he cared about them and he wanted me to know that despite him behaving like a dick generally, he did like me a lot.
During that night he asked if we could do some things together as friends - like play sports or take a trip or swim together. He literally does NOT have women friends, so it was nice he wants to hang out but I also wondered a bit if this means he is no longer attracted to me romantically! ?? We did kiss, but that's all.
Since that night, 5 days has passed and I haven't heard a word from him and it made me feel really sad and confused.
What is all this about? I am just honestly confused about what this guy wants from me. For a long time I thought it was sex, but I don't understand why he came over to play nurse only to ignore me after. Is this some kind of jerk here or am I missing something?
Aquarius are nurturing as long as they cre care about you.
Posted by aquarius_manCan you explain why he keeps running away and going on dates with other people?
your aqua likes you
This is so hard for me to understand as a Scorpio...it's the total opposite of how I behave if I like someone.
An Aquarius Venus isn't into your normal run of the mill relationship, he's probably testing you to see what he can get away with and what you're willing to settle for.
As far as I'm concerned we are very committed to relationships but the relationship can't be generic or unoriginal which is why he's trying to get you out of the house and establish the friendship first
We don't jump into one relationship straight after another and we are very patient people and are willing to wait as long as it takes until the right person comes along and build one from the bottom up just don't expect it to be a cookie cutter version.
As far as I'm concerned we are very committed to relationships but the relationship can't be generic or unoriginal which is why he's trying to get you out of the house and establish the friendship first
We don't jump into one relationship straight after another and we are very patient people and are willing to wait as long as it takes until the right person comes along and build one from the bottom up just don't expect it to be a cookie cutter version.
Posted by aquarius_manThank you, that's really comforting. I thought he was just playing with me, seeing if he could still have me or something.Posted by MondayMorninghe said it himself - you jumped into bed way too soon; he got cold feet. he hasn't been in a relationship for years, lost the habit of being mutually exclusive; even more, a relationship with a scorpio, which is destined to be intense. why lose all those groupies in favor of a one single woman. so many women out there, why trade them all off for one.Posted by aquarius_manCan you explain why he keeps running away and going on dates with other people?
your aqua likes you
This is so hard for me to understand as a Scorpio...it's the total opposite of how I behave if I like someone.
however, when on his own0, he started to realize you meant actually quite a lot to him, can't forget about you so easy. but he doesn't like to be tied down. when we have strong feelings for someone we show up in the middle of the night by your door to bring you hot soup. that s more than 'caring', trust me. but committing...thats a different storyclick to expand
If I care about someone the LAST thing I do is ignore them or date someone else, so this is tough for me.
What am I supposed to do? Patience? Be his friend?
Posted by MondayMorningDo you want to be ignored and with a man who goes with other woman?Posted by aquarius_manThank you, that's really comforting. I thought he was just playing with me, seeing if he could still have me or something.Posted by MondayMorninghe said it himself - you jumped into bed way too soon; he got cold feet. he hasn't been in a relationship for years, lost the habit of being mutually exclusive; even more, a relationship with a scorpio, which is destined to be intense. why lose all those groupies in favor of a one single woman. so many women out there, why trade them all off for one.Posted by aquarius_manCan you explain why he keeps running away and going on dates with other people?
your aqua likes you
This is so hard for me to understand as a Scorpio...it's the total opposite of how I behave if I like someone.
however, when on his own0, he started to realize you meant actually quite a lot to him, can't forget about you so easy. but he doesn't like to be tied down. when we have strong feelings for someone we show up in the middle of the night by your door to bring you hot soup. that s more than 'caring', trust me. but committing...thats a different story
If I care about someone the LAST thing I do is ignore them or date someone else, so this is tough for me.
What am I supposed to do? Patience? Be his friend?click to expand
I am a Scorpio.....he wouldn't stand a chance with me
He sounds confused and immature, i would set him free
Posted by aquarius_manSounds exhaustingPosted by MondayMorningHmm. I don't know. Each Aqua is different. Don't throw yourself at him. Let him struggle for a while' for you. Tease him. And try to see how often he initiates contact. How much he perseveres in pursuing you. Consistency will show you if he really wants to commit or will settle for ''loving you but not having you''. Aqua likes it like this: no pressure on him to be your lover - so he can keep his freedom intact - but also close to you so he won't lose you. I would have some patience (couple of months), but would eventually tell him what's what, take it or leave it.
Thank you, that's really comforting. I thought he was just playing with me, seeing if he could still have me or something.
If I care about someone the LAST thing I do is ignore them or date someone else, so this is tough for me.
What am I supposed to do? Patience? Be his friend?click to expand
it take years to understand aqua venus.
Hmm. Tricky. It's comforting to know you think he likes me and his behavior was genuine, because I feel a bit blindsided by the "let me nurse you when you're sick" / "let me totally disappear" act. It feels like weird behavior to me and also made me feel a little abandoned by someone I let get close to me at a vulnerable moment, which didn't feel nice.
@Mystarsshine I do feel a little exhausted tbh. Like it should be this complicated, but at the same time I actually deeply care about this man now so it's frustrating.
I will try and give him a small amount of leeway on this and maybe try doing some things as friends.
@Mystarsshine I do feel a little exhausted tbh. Like it should be this complicated, but at the same time I actually deeply care about this man now so it's frustrating.
I will try and give him a small amount of leeway on this and maybe try doing some things as friends.
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!
Posted by MondayMorningHas he ever been married and when was his last relationship??? I think you got a hard one to crack
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!
If he’s dating other girls, it means he likes multiple women. Maybe one day he’ll choose one, but there’s no telling who it will be.
Is that a risk you want to take?
Is that a risk you want to take?
That Aqua venus too.... ouch....
Posted by AerialView
it take years to understand aqua venus.
lol i remember all the topics for aqua venus men in the cap forum,
cap men with aqua venus must be harder to crack than those with pisces sun and sag sun
i think the aqua sun with aqua venus, the men ive seen commit had libra or pisces in their chart. lol
oh i remember also aries sun has aqua venus.
Posted by saweetz1988Posted by MondayMorningHas he ever been married and when was his last relationship??? I think you got a hard one to crack
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!click to expand
The first girl he dated got pregnant when he was 19 and he was with her for 21 years. He said it was just habit and he was committed and never thought about it but he was never "in love" and had never had sex with anybody else. Never married her though, even after 21 years.
He's now been dating for six years and not been exclusive with anyone and he tends to date multiple women at once. I find it incredible that they accept this - I said no way!
He admits he has a problem, which is at least a start. when we dated a year ago he said he had no problem and was happy with his ways, now a year later he's saying "hmm..maybe you were right and the life style I have is kind of sad".
Posted by aquarius_mansee??Posted by lisabethur8what does it mean aqua venus? im aqua venus. moon pisces. sagitt rising. also pisces and libra in my chart. ive stayed committed in 2 relationships spanning over 9 yrs. not committed in between.Posted by AerialView
it take years to understand aqua venus.
lol i remember all the topics for aqua venus men in the cap forum,
i think the aqua sun with aqua venus, the men ive seen commit had libra or pisces in their chart. lol
oh i remember also aries sun has aqua venus.click to expand
you can commit...
like this guy!
Posted by saweetz1988george clooney type!Posted by MondayMorningHas he ever been married and when was his last relationship??? I think you got a hard one to crack
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!click to expand
Ha ha, he's no George Clooney.
He has some amazing personal qualities, it's a shame he doesn't choose to give people any real chance for proper connection.
He has some amazing personal qualities, it's a shame he doesn't choose to give people any real chance for proper connection.
Call him now that youre okay. Disguise it as a thank you call. He will most likely be very pleased if not outright happy you called.
The disappearing after nurture is him not wanting to give an impression he expects a date out of you because "i nursed her back to health, only me, myself and I". Or coming too strong. But he'd like one for sure.
The disappearing after nurture is him not wanting to give an impression he expects a date out of you because "i nursed her back to health, only me, myself and I". Or coming too strong. But he'd like one for sure.
Posted by lisabethur8imagine venus square uranus whelp.Posted by AerialView
it take years to understand aqua venus.
lol i remember all the topics for aqua venus men in the cap forum,
cap men with aqua venus must be harder to crack than those with pisces sun and sag sun
i think the aqua sun with aqua venus, the men ive seen commit had libra or pisces in their chart. lol
oh i remember also aries sun has aqua venus.click to expand
Posted by MondayMorningIt's not really a problem but it's a problem for scorp mind set. I have lots of Aqua so for me it's kind of normal. If you think about it, being exclusive or marriage doesn't prove someone's loyalty at alll. I never believe in status or title myself. It doesn't prove anyone's love. This is how I see it anyway. so many couples cheat on each other. etc... I actually think we r all a free soul who is in this life to achieve the highest good and for me love should be freee. It shudnt feel like a trap. An ultimatum. I like that free feeling I get... the moment men ask me for exclusivity n I'm not ready I run pretty fast lol... Ofcoz I changed throughout the years and no I'm not an Aqua but this is the same for my Aqua girlfriend ... n the Aqua I'm talking to.. freedom is nice... to know that you can fly anywhere anytime without someone always bugging or getting angry when we return is the best feeling. I can't date a scoriocfor this reason. They want exclusivity on the first date .. I know that for a fact.... lol.. I can't do it n that's my moon n mars in Aqua talking... even if my sun in Taurus... n they get all revengeful at me n block me afterwards... but I just keep moving forward n never looking back lol.. maybe your Aqua misses you n has feelings for you but I don't know just becareful he's not being nice just to get in bed with you again. Men r tricky lol.. esp Aqua men.. seriously they are. That's why it's better to start off with honestly . B true friends with him. Know who he is deep inside n out.... n if it's meant to be it will flow on its own without being forced... I don't know this is how I see it....Posted by saweetz1988Posted by MondayMorningHas he ever been married and when was his last relationship??? I think you got a hard one to crack
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!
The first girl he dated got pregnant when he was 19 and he was with her for 21 years. He said it was just habit and he was committed and never thought about it but he was never "in love" and had never had sex with anybody else. Never married her though, even after 21 years.
He's now been dating for six years and not been exclusive with anyone and he tends to date multiple women at once. I find it incredible that they accept this - I said no way!
He admits he has a problem, which is at least a start. when we dated a year ago he said he had no problem and was happy with his ways, now a year later he's saying "hmm..maybe you were right and the life style I have is kind of sad".click to expand
Posted by Mr_PinchyI already did text him to thank him, and he was standoffish and distant
Call him now that youre okay. Disguise it as a thank you call. He will most likely be very pleased if not outright happy you called.
The disappearing after nurture is him not wanting to give an impression he expects a date out of you because "i nursed her back to health, only me, myself and I". Or coming too strong. But he'd like one for sure.
That was 5 days ago now and he didn't continue the conversation. He is so strange! I know from experience this means he has headed off to his doubts again so I leave him alone. I think he finds it comforting after being intimate with one woman to be quickly intimate with someone else. Maybe a defence mechanism
They nurture you if they think you are vulnerable. They like strong women. So, don;t rely on them in the future. Be strong, for yourself. They are extra.
Posted by Mr_PinchyYay that or just a quick message that she's grateful? Hasn't she sent anything to say thank you yet?
Call him now that youre okay. Disguise it as a thank you call. He will most likely be very pleased if not outright happy you called.
The disappearing after nurture is him not wanting to give an impression he expects a date out of you because "i nursed her back to health, only me, myself and I". Or coming too strong. But he'd like one for sure.
Posted by compyYeb this is very true. They only love strong women.... after a while don't expect that nice treatment for long hehehe ... they want to know u can handle life crisis all on your own.. they want a whole person not a half... seriously I have grown to b so omg , strong since meeting this Aqua.. the fire just keep coming coz he secretly pushes that side out of me. God knows how he did it, but Mayve now he's regretting it lol... Aqua is crazy, one min they want u to b strong the next min they r kind of sad if u r too strong or stronger than them...
They nurture you if they think you are vulnerable. They like strong women. So, don;t rely on them in the future. Be strong, for yourself. They are extra.
Posted by MondayMorningPosted by Mr_PinchyI already did text him to thank him, and he was standoffish and distant
Call him now that youre okay. Disguise it as a thank you call. He will most likely be very pleased if not outright happy you called.
The disappearing after nurture is him not wanting to give an impression he expects a date out of you because "i nursed her back to health, only me, myself and I". Or coming too strong. But he'd like one for sure.
I think he finds it comforting after being intimate with one woman to be quickly intimate with someone else. Maybe a defence mechanismclick to expand
Yeah.. very true. I think he's taking his Time to analyse eveything that has happened. What u see is 5 days is 1 day for him. Hang in there.
Posted by MondayMorninglel, you come to the womans house in the middle of the night with food, clean up her and her germ infasted place, risking infection of your own and all you get is a text. And that is after youve been rejected already.
I already did text him to thank him, and he was standoffish and distant
I think he finds it comforting after being intimate with one woman to be quickly intimate with someone else. Maybe a defence mechanism
I think he is distant because he is drowning in your gratitude. 😂😂😂
That was sarcasm btw, call, dont text...
Okay, I am going to hang in there just a little longer.
If I listen to my gut it tells me that he does like and care for me, but it also tells me that he's not going to change or get past this and he will be one of those guys mentioned above who's old and alone and just "dates".
He's very wealthy, so I guess there will be and endless supply of women on Tinder willing to "date" him while he does whatever he likes in the hope he'll settle down and pick her.
If I listen to my gut it tells me that he does like and care for me, but it also tells me that he's not going to change or get past this and he will be one of those guys mentioned above who's old and alone and just "dates".
He's very wealthy, so I guess there will be and endless supply of women on Tinder willing to "date" him while he does whatever he likes in the hope he'll settle down and pick her.
Honestly @Mr_Pinchy - I was very grateful and sweet to him and he was left in no doubt that night that I want to date him. Also, I wasn't infectious and he came over about 7pm
))) I've never left him in doubt since we met that I care about him and want to be with him, so honestly it is me who gets rejected over and over.
))) I've never left him in doubt since we met that I care about him and want to be with him, so honestly it is me who gets rejected over and over.Posted by Mr_PinchyPosted by MondayMorninglel, you come to the womans house in the middle of the night with food, clean up her and her germ infasted place, risking infection of your own and all you get is a text. And that is after youve been rejected already.
I already did text him to thank him, and he was standoffish and distant
I think he finds it comforting after being intimate with one woman to be quickly intimate with someone else. Maybe a defence mechanism
I think he is distant because he is drowning in your gratitude. 😂😂😂
That was sarcasm btw, call, dont text...click to expand
true.. maybe give him a call.
listen to mr punchy :p Posted by MondayMorningLook idk him or whats making him act like he does but i reread your opening post and stuff like that just isnt available to any run of the mill girl.
Honestly @Mr_Pinchy - I was very grateful and sweet to him and he was left in no doubt that night that I want to date him. Also, I wasn't infectious and he came over about 7pm
Opening up, telling you about fantasizing, at some point he was either very very infatuated with you if not downright crushing over you.
So he tried a few times to get close to you and i guess it didnt work out. "I want to be friends with you" is codespeak for "I wanna get in your pants". Who says "i wanna be friends anyway" to a woman he wanted to date without an ulterior motive?
It is also very possible that he sensed you wanted to date after that night and has now retreated to mull it over. Sometimes thrill of the chase is better than shackles that come on after a succesful "hunt". Sorry speaking in metaphores, wannabe writer here.
If he calls you or makes contact you can confront him with "is this going anywhere" this wouldnt naturally be the beat advice when dealing with aquas but you two have history already.
Idk go with your gut i suppose. Lots of wildcards in his description that make it almost impossible to predict him (46yo, with money, already has a kid).....
Posted by Mr_PinchySometimes thrill of the chase is better than shackles that come on after a succesful "hunt".I think this is it!!!click to expand
Posted by MondayMorningDo you really or do you really think this is it only because it backs up your gut?
I think this is it!!!
Posted by MondayMorningThis sounds like a complete headfuckPosted by Mr_PinchyI already did text him to thank him, and he was standoffish and distant
Call him now that youre okay. Disguise it as a thank you call. He will most likely be very pleased if not outright happy you called.
The disappearing after nurture is him not wanting to give an impression he expects a date out of you because "i nursed her back to health, only me, myself and I". Or coming too strong. But he'd like one for sure.
I think he finds it comforting after being intimate with one woman to be quickly intimate with someone else. Maybe a defence mechanismclick to expand
Posted by aquarius_manYes thisPosted by MondayMorningwow. tough. he acts very immature for his age. confront him directly then - either you want me and commit, or let me be. go to your women, you could add, for dramatic effect.
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!click to expand
I was with two aqua men.....they were faithful to me but I never felt they were ever fully present
I find aqua men not to be the best in one to one intimate relationships, especially for Scorpio women
Honestly...
I think is that he's got an aversion to being in a committed relationship or even trying dating exclusively to see what happens and he literally needs to alternate women, not seeing one for more than one night a week which breaks the flow of connection and stops any one woman from meaning too much to him.
I think he is in denial on multiple levels (1) because he believes the right woman will change his pattern and I personally think the "right woman" would probably tell him to go to hell like I did. (2) because he turns his own commitment issues onto the woman by focusing on her flaws as reasons not to give it a try rather than just getting to know her.
I do think his physical attraction for me is off the chart, but I also think he thinks I am kind and smart and generous and patient but I think he knew from day one that with me it was going to be the real deal and not Netflix and Chill and I think that was an uncomfortable place for him from the start.
I think he wants it, I think part of him regrets it but I think he tells himself we're "incompatible" because that makes it easier for him to lose something I think he actually wants and misses.
Obviously after dating a few weeks and seeing each other 5 or 6 times what do you really know in terms of compatibility? At that stage all he knew was he found me very hot and attractive and he liked me as a person and really that should be the starting point for investment but he never made the investment.
He made himself feel better by saying "yeah but it was purely physical" but he hasn't got the balls to admit he only allows it to be physical.
Back then, he saw one side of me: the side of me that is dating someone who wants to date other people. And that;s not my best side. I am assuming it's not the best side of most women. He doesn't know what it feels like to wake up in the morning with me because he's never tried it. He doesn't know what it feels like to call me and tell me something good happened that day because he never tried it.
He's too chicken shit to try it, and he comforts himself with his BS about compatibility. He's probably sitting there thinking he better ignore me and date someone else so I don't get any ideas about commitment or a relationship from his night as my nurse. So he communicates to me with his silence that I am not important to him.
No message is also a message, right?
I think when we were dating, he gave himself all these reasons I wasn't "the one" but he never actually took time to get to know me in order to make that judgement. It's easier for him that way to lose precious things and not feel too bad about it.
I do think over the past six months when we were talking but not seeing each other it was easier for him to open up and get closer because I was no real threat. I don't think he gets pleasure from sleeping with a variety of women. I think he's lonely and he fills the time with meaningless things because he's too scared to play a real hand at the table.
In my gut, I think he likes me. I maybe even think he might love me. I just don't think he is going to do anything about it and I think maybe the best thing I can do for him is to walk away.
I think is that he's got an aversion to being in a committed relationship or even trying dating exclusively to see what happens and he literally needs to alternate women, not seeing one for more than one night a week which breaks the flow of connection and stops any one woman from meaning too much to him.
I think he is in denial on multiple levels (1) because he believes the right woman will change his pattern and I personally think the "right woman" would probably tell him to go to hell like I did. (2) because he turns his own commitment issues onto the woman by focusing on her flaws as reasons not to give it a try rather than just getting to know her.
I do think his physical attraction for me is off the chart, but I also think he thinks I am kind and smart and generous and patient but I think he knew from day one that with me it was going to be the real deal and not Netflix and Chill and I think that was an uncomfortable place for him from the start.
I think he wants it, I think part of him regrets it but I think he tells himself we're "incompatible" because that makes it easier for him to lose something I think he actually wants and misses.
Obviously after dating a few weeks and seeing each other 5 or 6 times what do you really know in terms of compatibility? At that stage all he knew was he found me very hot and attractive and he liked me as a person and really that should be the starting point for investment but he never made the investment.
He made himself feel better by saying "yeah but it was purely physical" but he hasn't got the balls to admit he only allows it to be physical.
Back then, he saw one side of me: the side of me that is dating someone who wants to date other people. And that;s not my best side. I am assuming it's not the best side of most women. He doesn't know what it feels like to wake up in the morning with me because he's never tried it. He doesn't know what it feels like to call me and tell me something good happened that day because he never tried it.
He's too chicken shit to try it, and he comforts himself with his BS about compatibility. He's probably sitting there thinking he better ignore me and date someone else so I don't get any ideas about commitment or a relationship from his night as my nurse. So he communicates to me with his silence that I am not important to him.
No message is also a message, right?
I think when we were dating, he gave himself all these reasons I wasn't "the one" but he never actually took time to get to know me in order to make that judgement. It's easier for him that way to lose precious things and not feel too bad about it.
I do think over the past six months when we were talking but not seeing each other it was easier for him to open up and get closer because I was no real threat. I don't think he gets pleasure from sleeping with a variety of women. I think he's lonely and he fills the time with meaningless things because he's too scared to play a real hand at the table.
In my gut, I think he likes me. I maybe even think he might love me. I just don't think he is going to do anything about it and I think maybe the best thing I can do for him is to walk away.
Posted by bittercupcakeHehe sorry. Coz I love you too much! Joking. 😂😂😂
@saweetz1988 why do you keep quoting me and hiding your comment? lol
@Op. it's good to be confident and strong but oh my, you really sound like you have it all togheee and you are the hottest woman on the planet.... be humble just a little tiny bit.... just tone it down a bit...
Posted by tizianiit is for me. I've met other scorpio men in the past and i just couldnt get past friendshiip. they're really good guys. no complaints.Posted by aquarius_manone of the best relationships in the zodiac imho.Posted by MyStarsShinePosted by aquarius_manYes thisPosted by MondayMorningwow. tough. he acts very immature for his age. confront him directly then - either you want me and commit, or let me be. go to your women, you could add, for dramatic effect.
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!
I was with two aqua men.....they were faithful to me but I never felt they were ever fully present
I find aqua men not to be the best in one to one intimate relationships, especially for Scorpio women
i dont think they match, scorpio's not good for aqua, either. thats why i am always surprised to find out there are such relationships at allclick to expand
but my man got all the ingredients.
that's not me at all sorry if it came across that way.
sorry if it came across that way.He phoned me today to ask how I was. He told me he had a bad date last night and wasn't sleeping well.
I said to him "I actually think we would be really great together" and he said "really?" (Seemed suprised ) and i said "yes".
So first of all he weirdly didn't seem to know I wanted to be with him and second he wasn't really considering me as a potential romantically. Or it seemed that way!!
Then he said "interesting. You're a really good friend and I feel strong physical desire for you but is that enough?"
So I don't know what the heck to make of that but I guess he sees me as a friend he's attracted to but that's all.
I said to him "I actually think we would be really great together" and he said "really?" (Seemed suprised ) and i said "yes".
So first of all he weirdly didn't seem to know I wanted to be with him and second he wasn't really considering me as a potential romantically. Or it seemed that way!!
Then he said "interesting. You're a really good friend and I feel strong physical desire for you but is that enough?"
So I don't know what the heck to make of that but I guess he sees me as a friend he's attracted to but that's all.
Posted by MondayMorningIt didn't
that's not me at all
The guy seems flakey as hell, especially in view of his age
Don't waste your time on him....I sense he will be one of those aqua men who will end up lonely
Posted by tizianiReally not Tiz........two Aqua men laterPosted by aquarius_manone of the best relationships in the zodiac imho.Posted by MyStarsShinePosted by aquarius_manYes thisPosted by MondayMorningwow. tough. he acts very immature for his age. confront him directly then - either you want me and commit, or let me be. go to your women, you could add, for dramatic effect.
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!
I was with two aqua men.....they were faithful to me but I never felt they were ever fully present
I find aqua men not to be the best in one to one intimate relationships, especially for Scorpio women
i dont think they match, scorpio's not good for aqua, either. thats why i am always surprised to find out there are such relationships at allclick to expand
Posted by MyStarsShineTiz is right. i am with a Scorp.Posted by tizianiReally not Tiz........two Aqua men laterPosted by aquarius_manone of the best relationships in the zodiac imho.Posted by MyStarsShinePosted by aquarius_manYes thisPosted by MondayMorningwow. tough. he acts very immature for his age. confront him directly then - either you want me and commit, or let me be. go to your women, you could add, for dramatic effect.
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!
I was with two aqua men.....they were faithful to me but I never felt they were ever fully present
I find aqua men not to be the best in one to one intimate relationships, especially for Scorpio women
i dont think they match, scorpio's not good for aqua, either. thats why i am always surprised to find out there are such relationships at allclick to expand
you've missed out on two good men. don't mess with the third if there's any
Posted by AerialViewLucky escape from two weird men........thank youPosted by MyStarsShineTiz is right. i am with a Scorp.Posted by tizianiReally not Tiz........two Aqua men laterPosted by aquarius_manone of the best relationships in the zodiac imho.Posted by MyStarsShinePosted by aquarius_manYes thisPosted by MondayMorningwow. tough. he acts very immature for his age. confront him directly then - either you want me and commit, or let me be. go to your women, you could add, for dramatic effect.
this Aqua is 46 years old!!!
I was with two aqua men.....they were faithful to me but I never felt they were ever fully present
I find aqua men not to be the best in one to one intimate relationships, especially for Scorpio women
i dont think they match, scorpio's not good for aqua, either. thats why i am always surprised to find out there are such relationships at all
you've missed out on two good men. don't mess with the third if there's anyclick to expand
You are with a woman....different story
Lol
He took your notes to heart and is trying to slow down the physical and open up emotionally.
All the aquas I know were friends first before getting into a relationship with their so
All the aquas I know were friends first before getting into a relationship with their so
Posted by MondayMorningThis is just a ruse on his part. Acting all ignorant and unknowing. He feels it too, if he wouldnt he wouldnt be texting you out of the blue or come to you when you were sick.
I said to him "I actually think we would be really great together" and he said "really?" (Seemed suprised ) and i said "yes".
When he said "really" he was just buying time for a real answer and put the ball back to you to see what kind of reasoning youd come up with for that statement. Its like a little test of conviction "how much do you want me".
Posted by MondayMorningTwo main ingredients for something long term from an aqua perspective right there.
Then he said "interesting. You're a really good friend and I feel strong physical desire for you but is that enough?"click to expand
However, id still advise if going forward to stick to your guns and demand exclusivity. He will respect you more (which is a third ingredient).
And if he cannot offer that....say fuck it and au revoir. He'll come texting back in a few months with "honey ive changed i was so wrong to let you go blablabla".
But then it might already be too late.
Damn i just hope i dont end up like him....😨
Posted by MyStarsShineHow does that saying go....third time's a charm?
Lucky escape from two weird men........thank you
Lol
😂😂😂
Maybe he's digesting what I said. He did seem happy to hear it but maybe that's his ego. Can't read him at all.
We talked a lot more today and it was pretty playful and fun which was nice. I opened up and talked a lot and usually when I do that he doesn't reply but this time he did and said "you always freak me out with this shit but it's you being you and I love you for it".
At least I feel coming away like I told him how I felt and he knows. If he doesn't choose me at least I know!
It's obvious now that he values my friendship but as much as he value his too I can't stick around as a friend if he sees me as only that. I like him romantically so that would he hurtful!
We talked a lot more today and it was pretty playful and fun which was nice. I opened up and talked a lot and usually when I do that he doesn't reply but this time he did and said "you always freak me out with this shit but it's you being you and I love you for it".
At least I feel coming away like I told him how I felt and he knows. If he doesn't choose me at least I know!
It's obvious now that he values my friendship but as much as he value his too I can't stick around as a friend if he sees me as only that. I like him romantically so that would he hurtful!
Posted by Mr_PinchyHaha, in this case, third time is madness lolPosted by MyStarsShineHow does that saying go....third time's a charm?
Lucky escape from two weird men........thank you
Lol
😂😂😂click to expand
Is that Aquanoz?
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